- July 25, 2021 at 7:45 pm #522990Abbie NormalParticipantRegistered On: June 13, 2021Topics: 10Replies: 472Has thanked: 835 timesBeen thanked: 1687 times
Hello again ladies…
So I finally got out for a second drive. This probably seems ridiculously tame for many of you and probably absolutely terrifying for others? The first trip a week ago was very short, just up the road and back. Today’s trip was more of an excursion. I spent all of last week as Abbie and it seemed to normalize things for me, my confidence level was up, I had time and a potentially unreliable vehicle at my disposal. I did bring a ‘ditch bag’ in case I had to man-up as they say but it went unused. I also noted which properties had pride flags displayed, a surprising amount actually, in case I needed to pull in somewhere friendly but really I was just being careful.
I drove around the island I live on for 1 hour and 45 minutes! I passed many people out walking their dogs. Narrow and twisty roads means going slow especially around people and their dogs. It was hot so my windows were down making me feel a bit more exposed. Several men and one woman looked at me, smiled and waved, just being friendly, they didn’t know me. No one recoiled in shock or horror which was nice 😊. I actually stopped on a few quiet roads and took some photos. I also stopped at a beach access point with cars parked. They were empty but my adrenaline was flowing a bit at this point. I walked over to the beach stairs to get a few shots, I could hear people talking on the beach. I got away unseen and unscathed.
As I started to head back I stopped at one final pull-off with an amazing view, I thought “just enough room for me”, the road was fairly busy (a car a minute, lol). Anyway, as soon as I got out and walked around to the passenger side to take in the view a Trans Am (how appropriate) with the top down pulled in right behind me. Thankfully it was an older gentleman and his girl trying to get a look at the view. I didn’t realize this and quickly walked back around and got in my truck and started fumbling with the keys (the first time I’d shut it off on the whole trip). While I was doing this they pulled out. I was in full view, they didn’t say anything. I’m sure they saw me, they were only 10 feet away. I was super self conscious about my hands for some reason. I really need to get some distracting jewelry. Anyway, I got out of the truck again and got my shots and had a great rest of my drive.
I will do this again.
— Abbie 🥰
- This topic was modified 1 month ago by Abbie Normal.
Total of 41 users thanked author for this post. Here are last 20 listed.
- July 29, 2021 at 2:24 pm #524666RachLadyRegistered On: January 16, 2021Topics: 1Replies: 20Has thanked: 32 timesBeen thanked: 97 times
Abbie, what a great story! Thank you for sharing. Your writing captures the emotions of the event well. As I read the post, I simultaneously relive my first experiences and imagine myself in the car beside you.
The constant battle between fear and excitement can be overwhelming, but it’s a fun ride!
1 user thanked author for this post.
- July 29, 2021 at 3:15 pm #524674
- July 29, 2021 at 5:55 am #524543GenevïēveLadyRegistered On: July 28, 2020Topics: 47Replies: 1712Has thanked: 13555 timesBeen thanked: 7106 times
Sorry I’m late to the party…
Wow, you look fantastic. I doubt anyone would think twice. As Miss Plumb mentioned, people will see you, register a ‘Woman’, and carry on.
Congratulations on your second drive and getting out in the world. It’s a wonderful feeling isn’t it.
I’m at the same point in my journey as you. Twice now I have driven to work dressed (sans makeup), then change into a drab work uniform once there. As you mention… a bit ‘tame’, however we are all at different stages of our journeys.
Looking forward to reading about your third adventure…
- July 28, 2021 at 1:32 pm #524312Amanda BurtonBaroness - AnnualRegistered On: January 15, 2020Topics: 47Replies: 1971Has thanked: 10982 timesBeen thanked: 7820 times
Congratulations Abbie, I bet you feel wonderful. Love the pic, you look amazing. As you quickly noticed most people see you but actually don’t see you., in other words they see what they are expecting to see a female driving or walking. Now you have the confidence to venture out driving it opens a whole new world of freedom for you to enjoy. Lol Amanda xx
- July 27, 2021 at 11:54 am #523848
- July 27, 2021 at 11:12 am #523830Michelle McQueenLadyRegistered On: June 14, 2021Topics: 12Replies: 404Has thanked: 1511 timesBeen thanked: 1963 times
Congratulations Abbie. Your pic looks great and so do you sweetie. Keep on getting out and soon you won’t think much about what others see or think. Confidence is our greatest weapon against our detractors. Baby steps.
- July 27, 2021 at 11:28 am #523840
- July 27, 2021 at 11:08 am #523829LaylajLadyRegistered On: June 7, 2020Topics: 0Replies: 55Has thanked: 426 timesBeen thanked: 194 times
- July 27, 2021 at 11:27 am #523838
- July 27, 2021 at 8:58 am #523759Michelle TrottDuchessRegistered On: April 7, 2021Topics: 1Replies: 307Has thanked: 554 timesBeen thanked: 1374 times
Hi Abby. You look great out on your ride. I can remember being scared to hell the first many times I went out. It gets easier and easier but the first times are also so exciting. I would stop and help a pretty lady like you anytime your semi reliable vehicle quit.
- July 27, 2021 at 10:42 am #523818
- July 27, 2021 at 8:38 am #523748Tonya JohnsonLadyRegistered On: July 17, 2021Topics: 1Replies: 105Has thanked: 153 timesBeen thanked: 305 times
Congratulations Abbie. Sounds like you had fun. I’m sure your confidence will continue to grew. I started off slow but now I walk around with almost no worry as Tonya. I love it.
- This reply was modified 1 month ago by Tonya Johnson.
- July 27, 2021 at 10:41 am #523817
- July 27, 2021 at 8:23 am #523743Jin CrockerLadyRegistered On: November 15, 2019Topics: 4Replies: 420Has thanked: 29 timesBeen thanked: 1260 times
- July 27, 2021 at 3:45 am #523666Patty PhoseDuchessRegistered On: May 7, 2016Topics: 0Replies: 1742Has thanked: 1318 timesBeen thanked: 4965 times
Congratulations on you second drive and even getting out of the car. So you were seen. That’s great. I know how nerve wracking that can be but afterwards the experience can be such a rush.
For me, I did little things just like that, then began doing more and getting a bit bolder each time. Still, I was always nervous and often chickened out. But eventually I went and did the adventure.
- July 27, 2021 at 3:17 am #523660Marie LawDuchessRegistered On: June 27, 2021Topics: 2Replies: 42Has thanked: 104 timesBeen thanked: 196 times
- July 26, 2021 at 12:08 pm #523301stephanie plumbBaroness - AnnualRegistered On: November 17, 2018Topics: 176Replies: 2412Has thanked: 3813 timesBeen thanked: 11508 times
Well done on the start of your outside journey. Confidence is the key, and yours will increase as you realise the following things:-
You are not the centre of the Universe
You don’t have a neon sign above your head flashing “Look! A man in a dress!!”
No one is interested in what you are doing, they are too busy doing whatever it is they are doing.
No one is staring at your hands! (they are more likely to notice your boobs.)
Judging by your photo you will be accepted as being female even as close up as 10 feet. You are fully capable of “hiding in plain sight.”
Most people only give casual glances – they don’t actually register much except – its a woman. Five seconds later they won’t be able to describe what colour your hair was.
So, get out there girl and own your space!
- July 26, 2021 at 12:36 pm #523315Abbie NormalDuchessRegistered On: June 13, 2021Topics: 10Replies: 472Has thanked: 835 timesBeen thanked: 1687 times
Thanks so much Stephanie! It’s jarring to realize that after all the work that goes into being our femme selves most people won’t even notice, also, what a relief.
My next big adventure might be testing the waters with my wife. She knows I dress and she’s seen me in underthings but she’s never seen Abbie. I think I’ll ask rather than showing her unexpectedly though, no point in ruining a perfectly acceptable situation. If that fails for now, I’ll always have the car drives, I have another planned this Sunday.
Now if I could just stop staring at my hands when I’m feeling a bit exposed and exude the confidence required…
Thanks again for your words of encouragement and compliments, I’ll carry them with me on my next adventure.
— Abbie 🥰
- July 27, 2021 at 5:21 am #523687Jeannie JonesDuchessRegistered On: October 9, 2020Topics: 12Replies: 646Has thanked: 2136 timesBeen thanked: 2255 times
Yes asking her first is the right way to go rather than just a reveal.
- July 27, 2021 at 1:58 am #523649stephanie plumbBaroness - AnnualRegistered On: November 17, 2018Topics: 176Replies: 2412Has thanked: 3813 timesBeen thanked: 11508 times
In the not to far distant future you will look back and laugh at your self-consciousness.
A tip I have learned – oversized sunglasses (bling optional) – are amazing for your self-confidence because you have something to hide behind if you are feeling nervous (and conceal a lot of things! especially if you haven’t had time to do your lashes and eyebrows.)
A face-framing wig + sunglasses + lipstick …… and not much of your face can been seen. As for the hands, just curl in your fingers a bit and they look a lot smaller. Or hold the strap of a cross-body purse – that only leaves one with nothing to do.
- July 27, 2021 at 8:12 am #523731Abbie NormalDuchessRegistered On: June 13, 2021Topics: 10Replies: 472Has thanked: 835 timesBeen thanked: 1687 times
I’ve been thinking about purses lately, I feel a bit dumb all done up and my wallet sitting on the passenger seat. Plus a girl needs a few other things with her.
— Abbie 🥰
- July 27, 2021 at 8:47 am #523753stephanie plumbBaroness - AnnualRegistered On: November 17, 2018Topics: 176Replies: 2412Has thanked: 3813 timesBeen thanked: 11508 times
Sure do. I have a smallish burgundy leather one. Looks good with any outfit.
Great for car-keys when you set off on a walk. I carry a fold-up brush, compact mirror, tissues, lippy and brow pencil. And mobile phone and sunglasses.
- July 26, 2021 at 12:29 pm #523311Aurora EdenLadyRegistered On: June 29, 2021Topics: 19Replies: 157Has thanked: 738 timesBeen thanked: 688 times
Well said, Stephanie,
Those things reflect the very same that I have also experienced.
In general, most people are too wrapped up in what they are doing to notice anything out of the ordinary in someone else.
- This reply was modified 1 month ago by Aurora Eden.
- July 26, 2021 at 9:01 am #523194Angela BoothLadyRegistered On: August 1, 2020Topics: 3Replies: 263Has thanked: 337 timesBeen thanked: 1160 times
- July 26, 2021 at 9:09 am #523197
- July 26, 2021 at 8:44 am #523186Aurora EdenLadyRegistered On: June 29, 2021Topics: 19Replies: 157Has thanked: 738 timesBeen thanked: 688 times
You look great, if I may say so.
I remember the feeling of going out for a drive the first time; the self-consciousness and fear of being spotted. After a time, with the odd exception, I realized that most people are more concerned with what they are doing and not what someone else might be wearing.
Anyway, you really do look great and if the older gent and his lady had spoken to you it would very likely be only remarks on the wonderful day.
Keep doing what makes you happy, Abbie and congratulations on taking that first big step into the outside world.
- July 26, 2021 at 9:11 am #523201
- July 26, 2021 at 8:43 am #523185Bianca EverdeneLadyRegistered On: April 11, 2017Topics: 27Replies: 873Has thanked: 3539 timesBeen thanked: 3648 times
Thanks for sharing Abbie. Bet you felt fabulous.
I totally get your terror at others in close proximity to you, but from your photo you have nothing to worry about.
Next time (and there will be a next time) you will be calmer, more relaxed, maybe even try some eye contact, a smile, a wave, 99.9% sure any casual interaction will be reciprocated and believe me it really is the icing on the cake. The start of you ‘relaxing into Abbie’ realising ‘what’s the worst that can happen’ even if somebody does realise you are more than you seem to be.
- July 26, 2021 at 9:22 am #523206DuchessRegistered On: June 13, 2021Topics: 10Replies: 472Has thanked: 835 timesBeen thanked: 1687 times
Thanks Bianca! I still feel fabulous today 🥰. I’m feeling so supported which will really help on my next excursion. I tried some eye contact but I realized later that I had sun glasses on while driving LOL. I should have been flashing my eyes though, my makeup worked out alright that day. Still a work in progress…
— Abbie 😘
- July 26, 2021 at 8:22 am #523175Stephanie KennedyPrincessRegistered On: March 15, 2019Topics: 19Replies: 1112Has thanked: 7847 timesBeen thanked: 4661 times
Hi Abbie thank you for sharing what appears to be a very nice day. I love the dress I looked at one similar and almost bought it but the size was questionable for me. You look lovely and it should be a picture you keep if nothing else a reminder how pretty you were when the years get the best of your beauty. Just keep on doing what you are doing.The very worst that can happen is some might say to themselves I thought I saw a man wearing a cute dress and she was stunning. Good for you for expressing that special part of you that we al have kept hidden for whatever reason. Stay pretty as long as you can for as long as you can. You will have no regrets.
- July 26, 2021 at 9:07 am #523196
- July 26, 2021 at 7:25 am #523146helenmarieLadyRegistered On: August 1, 2018Topics: 11Replies: 171Has thanked: 6 timesBeen thanked: 548 times
Hello Abbie, Good for you to go out for a drive dressed a Abbie. Your confidence will grow as you go out more. Try going out & then stopping at shopping centre (Mall) just get out & walk around the car park at first, then maybe you can venture inside, it all takes time. I have only been going out in public for about a year now, started slowly then I got more confident, now I will go out all day fully dressed, go to the shops/supermarket & visit places of interest, Castles/Houses/Gardens etc. So take your time & enjoy when you go out, it is a great feeling when out fully dressed as a lady. love, Helenmarie
- July 26, 2021 at 7:49 am #523160DuchessRegistered On: June 13, 2021Topics: 10Replies: 472Has thanked: 835 timesBeen thanked: 1687 times
Thanks for the words of encouragement Helenmarie. The little island I’m on doesn’t have an indoor mall with parking garage but I could adapt your ideas for what I do have I’m sure. I’m a bit hooked on going out now. It seems to be a bit of thrill seeking and large amount of new found freedom to be explored.
— Abbie 🥰
- July 29, 2021 at 4:01 am #524516helenmarieLadyRegistered On: August 1, 2018Topics: 11Replies: 171Has thanked: 6 timesBeen thanked: 548 times
Hello Abbie, I am pleased that you like my ideas, & that you will try & go out in which ever way you feel comfortable. As we all say it will take time, slowly at first. I had a first the other day, went in to a clothes shop & liked this dress, so I asked the assistant if I could try it on, she said yes. So went into the changing room tried it on, was ok, came out & bought it. Never tried on a dress in a shop before. The morjority of people & shop assistants are very nice & helpful to us CD, so do not worry about reactions to you in CD mode. love, Helenmarie
- July 26, 2021 at 7:01 am #523135Trisha SmithDuchessRegistered On: August 24, 2020Topics: 23Replies: 303Has thanked: 128 timesBeen thanked: 1445 times
I love driving around. For some reason I see different things when driving enfemme. ‘He’ sees deer and dogs ‘she’ sees flowers and views. It really is a mindset thing. Plus the looks I get are priceless. Especially since I am usually driving a 3/4 ton truck. Maybe I should buy some cowgirl boots to go with my skirt and blouse.
- July 26, 2021 at 7:07 am #523138DuchessRegistered On: June 13, 2021Topics: 10Replies: 472Has thanked: 835 timesBeen thanked: 1687 times
- July 26, 2021 at 7:11 am #523141Trisha SmithDuchessRegistered On: August 24, 2020Topics: 23Replies: 303Has thanked: 128 timesBeen thanked: 1445 times
I live in a very rural area. It is about 20 minutes from Columbus Ohio but it may as well be an hour the way the city drops off and cornfields spring up. And I do love it there.
I will say tho, Trisha would live an cute little fiat convertible.
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