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I came out a few months ago and everything has been great. Brandy’s wardrobe has gotten bigger she got some cute heels and boots. I started thinking am I a crossdresser or is it I just like to play dress up or both. I sometimes get into my own head. How about you Is it crossdressing, playing dress up, or like to crossdress because it gives us a chance to play dress up??
Thinking out loud.
It was playing dress up, when I was staying with my cousin ( a girl a year older than me).She had lots of hand down clothes that her mom gave her. Everything from lingerie to skirts and dresses. She even had heels that were outdated. After some coaxing she got me to agree to let her dress me in some of these clothes. At first I refused because I was a young boy and I thought that wearing women’s clothes were for girls and not boys She was able to convince me to at least try and I agreed to let her.At first I wasn’t to enthused about it, but she applied makeup and a wig that changed the way I looked from a young boy into a passable looking girl. She showed me how to walk in heels and sit as a girl dose by crossing my legs. The deciding thing was that she let me wear her panties and her bra. This changed my mind about letting her dress me up. My voice hadn’t changed yet so when I spoke I sounded like a girl She convinced me to go to the movies with her as a girl and thats when I realized that I enjoyed being seen as a girl She interduced me as her cousin from out of town and everyone was convinced that was who I was Thats when I became a crossdresser. Of course it was years later that I acquired my own female clothes and lingerie and I’ve been wearing women’s clothes ever since. So Brindle, I guess that it started by playing dress up and escalated into me being a crossdresser. I hope this helps you understand that there is a difference between dress up and crossdressing, at least there is a difference for me I actually attended her wedding dressed en femme and I was one of her bridesmaids. She was the only one who knew that I was a crossdresser
Wow Jannie, I enjoyed reading your story so much, I am so envious of you for having such a wonderful cousin, to show you how to dress at a young age and also introduce you to the mysteries of makeup early and then your first public outing as well! I wish I had had someone to tutor me at that age, that’s for sure. And to cap it all off you were a bridesmaid at your cousins wedding – how much fun was that? My hat’s off to you Jannie you have lived the life that many crossdressers dream of, I hope you are still loving it and may it continue to bring you joy.
With much admiration, Diana 💋
This is actually a great question Brandy!
For me personally, it definitely started out as ‘playing dress up’. That time when I was a child I put down to curiosity and intrigue. At the time, I wouldn’t have understood what it really meant.
When I gave into my thoughts at the beginning of this year and dressing, it was definitely the feel of the clothes, the bra, the panties that did it for me. Wearing them gave me happiness and pleasure that I hadn’t felt before. I did this for a while and it was great and I believe during this time, it was nothing more than dressing up.
Then I hit a point where I wanted more. I wanted to wear different outfits, different shoes and I think this was the turning point from dressing up to being a crossdresser. For the first time in my life, I was thinking about clothes in a completely different way and as items to love rather than taking all of about 10 seconds to choose a t shirt and jeans or a suit (back in the olden days when I sometimes went to an office hehe).
For me, soon as I started thinking like a woman, that was the pivotal moment. When I started thinking that things were cute or pretty and wondered if a dress would look good on me, it stopped being dress up.
To clarify, I absolutely love the dressing up bit. I love the clothes, and I’m excited for the other bits I’ve not tried yet like make up, nails and jewellery. They all make me feel gorgeous, beautiful and femme and that feeling is amazing.
But, what I also love now is the fact my mind is also changing and that shows me I’m growing as a crossdresser.
Love Rachel
For me, the desire to dress in girls clothes came first, and I got into acting and dressing up purely for the chance to wear the clothes.
Unfortunately, none of my acting roles have given me that opportunity – although I enjoy acting, dressing up and being someone else for a while – it’s always a disappointment that I never get a female role. There isn’t much call for a 6’4″ lady, not even in pantomime. The dame part usually goes to a guy who is properly shorter than 5′ 10″ in my experience.
It’s a sad case of “Why am I never the bridesmaid, still less the blushing bride”.
#violins
Love Laura
Hi Brandie
For me it is more dress up, I don’t think I could ever pass anyway and I dress in private for my own pleasure. When I first joined CDH I posted a message asking if this was appropriate for the site. So many girls on here are committed to life changing journeys I felt my desire to put on high heels and a dress somehow trivialised what they where going through. I have come to realise there are lots girls with different aspirations for themselves and all are welcome.
Jen
Hi Jen
What you are doing in no way trivialises what others are doing – we’re all sisters here, honey!
You understand the desire to dress in a way that is not traditional for the male sex, and that makes you a valuable member of this site.
I assume that you also are curious about why you feel that way, and how to take the next step, if you have one in mind – in which case you’re no different to the rest of us, except for the fact you’re different and individual… oh you know what I mean!
Big hugs!
Laura.
Thank you Laura for your lovely supportive message. When I first joined I was unsure what was acceptable on the site. Was it for people who wanted to transition , or people who just enjoyed a bit of fun in feminine clothing, The great thing is, it is for everybody.
I don’t know if I would take a next step. It’s whatever you are comfortable with
love
Jen
Playing dress up? Are you kidding?
I am Polly… I have to have clothes otherwise I cannot go out! I have but few drab clothes left except my most memorable of favourite items.
I have no drab underwear at all! I don’t even possess any androgynous clothing either.
I only have clothes that serve Polly… I have business suits (female style), various dresses, skirts and tops, cardigans, sweaters, parkas, lingerie of various sorts (some to tempt my wife!)… But I don’t ‘play’ dress-up.
I’m not even a cross dresser in the strictest sense of the word… I AM POLLY, a somewhat newbie woman… an apprentice woman if you will but I am deadly serious about what I am!Polly
” Apprentice woman”. That’s a fascinating way to look at it, Polly. Thank you.
To me both terms are really one and the same…crossdressing in women’s clothes, dressing up in women’s clothing… yep
💖
For me its more of a way of life. I wear 24/7 and my crossdressing is a lot different then most. I more an androgynous crossdresser. I like to mix both genders of clothing together. Example would be like. Leggings and/or skirts combined with men’s tee shirts or a dress with my beard and chest hair popping out everywhere.
See I am a Twisted Sister.
Just kinda like them 1980s heavy metal hair bands.
Hippie
I largely agree with the previous post, unless your tg it’s playing dress up. But I believe everyone plays dress up, ggs included. When women get dressed to go out for an evening (makeup , heels etc) they are playing dress up. Their motivation may be different Ie to get attention from the opposite sex or to simply feel good about themselves knowing they look good. I don’t believe people spend that much time and discomfort without a payoff. Most of us want to look attractive in whatever we wear even in drab. I feel when we look good we feel good. It just happens to be many of us like the way we look in clothes not associated with our born gender. One nice thing being a straight dresser is having a built in audience of one. He always loves when Melanie plays dress up or whatever it is she calls it.
If I’m playing “dress up”, it’s on a permanent basis. Every bit of clothing on my body has been ladies’ wear for the past year – including coats and hats; and it feels right and natural for me to be wearing them.
I think everyone starts as playing dress up. I “dressed up” off and on for years but only as a closet dresser. It changed when I came out to others, especially when I went public. When Beth came out to the world she was serious. Now my male persona never leaves the house because he has no mens clothes. Beth is the only one who goes out. She is in charge, she loves her man side just as much as ever, but they have switched primary and dependant roles.
Personally it’s a bit of both. I consider it crossdressing when I’m in something comfortable. Like a skirt and a cute top, jeans and a tshirt, sundress, and so on. It’s dress up for me when in a costume, a business suit, a cocktail dress, a lovely LBD, killer heels. Hope I’m offending anyone by this.
I guess I don’t really differentiate the terms, other than the, “play” part. I feel like Birel is part of who I am, not some pretend game or something.
It’s an interesting question though, as many of you know, I have been struggling to figure out my own identity. I have noticed a change in my own feelings about dressing lately though. If I put on a dress or skirt, I’m still terrified that I would be viewed as an imposter or something. Where, if I’m just hanging out around the house in a skimpy t-shirt and short shorts, I feel natural. I feel like me. I feel like, “Why can’t I just go out for a walk and enjoy the weather like this?” Know what I mean?
Birel
I crossdress and seriously considering transition. When I was younger and exploring, it was dress up.
Oh it’s more than crossdressing for me. I love the feeling of slipping into hosiery, the feel of the slip, the way the dress falls across my boobs and it’s so sexual sliding my foot into a pair of heels. It just makes me feel alive and excited to be so feminine. It’s no pretending because it’s just me feeling the need to let my girl out for some fun.
When the urge to dress and the chance is there I love to dress up fully. Really enjoy the sensations of getting dressed and the whole transition into suppose another me with a different personality.
When dressed sometimes just enjoying relaxing in one outfit. Other times and more usually i change into different outfits and different looks. Constantly changing shoes tights and various accessories so guess that is kind of dressing up but wouldn’t classs as playing as such.
Intresting point.
There’s some fantastic answers below, which collectively really highlight both the similarities and differences between us.
For me, clothes I wear enable me to present the gender I feel closest to at that time. Soooo the teaser is, if I feel female at the point I put my clothes on, am I crosdressing at all. But then, calling it dressing up doesn’t do it justice. Why can’t I just be getting dressed?
Hmm, I better go and gave a lie down and think about it.
Didi💋
being a cross dresser by definition means you like to “dress up” I think we all too much try to “label” what or how we do. At the end of the day, if you enjoy dressing up, then just do it to the extent and amount that suits you. I enjoy dressing up, the look and feel of the clothes, applying the make and perfume. I think over time, what and how we dress up evolves and changes based upon how much we accept it and are willing to go with the flow!~
Interesting thought, Brandie. A few months back I started to write an article here wondering if we all had a desire to be a ‘princess’ or maybe a teenager going to prom. Writing something more than 3 or 4 paragraphs is difficult for me( by that time I start to loose my train of thought and get bored writing any more.
Ahh
Ahh
Ahh what was i talking — oh yea.
Since most of us never had the experience of playing dress up or dressing for the prom in a lovely gown, we want to try that to see how we look or how it feels.
For many after years of cross dressing dressing in jeans and tennies and a nice top may be enough to get in touch with our feminine side
Just wondering. SandyMerriam Webster has more to say about dressing up… It’s not just a game – it can have more serious purposes.
“to attire in clothes suited to a particular role”
Wearing clothes is dressing up 😁😍😍😍😍🤗
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