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Forums are probably one of the best things about the internet. They are usually focused around a single topic or interest so joining one allows you to immerse yourself in that single interest and share it with others that are just as passionate about it.
If you stick around long enough you inevitably start to make connections with other people. And by and large these connections are usually casual, but since you share this same interest it feels more than say a casual conversation you might strike up with a stranger while sitting next to them in a bar or on a plane.
Occasionally, though a deeper connection occurs and through private message the conversation goes deeper. You are more free to share additional details about your life and experiences. Thirty years ago people would have scoffed at the idea of making meaningful friendships with people you may never meet in person. It’s funny though, because it has happened to me on more than one occasion on various forum sites. But it occurred most recently for me here on CDH. Many of us come here because we are alone or are seeking answers. Both of those reasons apply to me. Here I find community in an area of my life that if spoken about publicly would be heavily rediculed and in some circumstances be met with hostility or violence. That is why this forum is such a valuable place. Here we can connect and discuss freely our joys, problems, and concerns. And when we do we are greeted by caring words, encouragement, and kindness.
Not too long ago I private messaged another member and that single conversation has grown into what I consider a good and wonderful friendship. Like all good friendships it happened when I wasn’t necessarily looking for a friend, but our words back and forth caused one to form, and for that I am immensely grateful.
Last night my friend presented me with a gift. It was handcrafted and personalized. The affect of this gift was probably much more impactful than my friend would have expected. It reminded me of my mother who I lost when I was 8yo and it validated who I am today or rather who I have always been. To capture that much of a person through a single gift represents a rare talent.
I tend to be a bashful gift giver myself so I will refrain from naming my friend as she knows who she is, and she is a very awesome woman! I thanked her last night, but it didn’t feel like enough. I hope this message conveys the level of gratitude I felt last night when I opened her email.
To my friend – thank you. I will treasure this gift with as much care as I treasure this friendship 💕.
~darcy
What a wonderful story Darcy! I have also had the pleasure of meeting some very special women and I have also made some very special friends here on CDH. You know when you meet someone for the first time and your personalities just match, that is what has happened to me here and I am very grateful of our friendship.
My advise is try to open up. Write a story in one of the forums. Read the forums and other people’s stories. One might just stand out and make you feel different such that you can relate to what they are saying.
If you find one that does that to you then try replying back, look at their profile and ask to be a friend or, even, send them a private message telling them how their story had an affect on you.
Good luck and enjoy your time here at CDH.
Darcy,
What a wonderful and heartfelt post! Makes me misty reading this and puts a smile on my face that will probably last for days. I feel warm and fuzzy inside! You are amazing and your special friend is lucky to have someone you in her life.You make the world a better place Darcy 😘
Hugs,
BettyHaving been here for over seven years now, this doesn’t surprise me at all. When I joined there were only about 100 members (and the chat room didn’t exist yet. Thus ALL communication was through the forums and PMs. I too have made many great friends here-many of whom I’ve been able to meet in person while attending conferences like Esprit and Keystone or on vacation trips. I’ve been lucky enough to meet over 100 members including close to half the staff. While I have hundreds perhaps thousands of acquaintances here, there are dozens I consider fairly close friends and a core group that are “almost family” (more so in some cases than my biological family. Sometimes I met these friends in person shortly after meeting them onsite; others it was months or even years later. Though I can’t possibly list them all, I was lucky to meet Jas in person last October after talking with her in PMs, public and private chats, texts, video calls for the last 7 years! So in conclusion -yes you can most definitely make true friends here , and-if you’re lucky-maybe get to know them in the ‘real world’ too.
Cyn
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