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  • #518240
    Natalee Brooks
    Participant
    Registered On: July 7, 2021
    Topics: 2
    Replies: 16
    Has thanked: 102 times
    Been thanked: 71 times

    Hi Ladies,

    Got 2 current issues in facing.  First, there is a local toy shop that I go to for clothes toys etc. The shop owner there is super sweet and friendly.  She’s been super helpful for me helping me get new heels, clothes, etc.  She knows that I’m a crossdresser and is totally ok with it.  I’ve worn an outfit underneath my clothes twice now to go shopping at her store and I want to show it to her but I’m unsure how to go about it.  Any tips/advise?

    Second,

    I’m going on a vacation back home and seeing friends and family.  I have an old friend that I’m stopping to see.  He and I have fooled around some in our past.  Now there’s a chance to re visit our situation that never had closure from before.  What should I expect or not expect going forward with this visit.

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    • #521175
      Brianna Rizzoli
      Duchess
      Registered On: November 10, 2020
      Topics: 6
      Replies: 41
      Has thanked: 124 times
      Been thanked: 195 times

      Hi Nat:

      I cant advise on the second dilemma but I can on the first.

      I do a lot of my in person shopping at a local, Norther California lingerie shop. It is a small shop that carries costume clothing, fetish clothing and straight up racy lingerie. It was always fairly empty and the young goth girl who worked during the day seemed pleasant and not perturbed about me shopping there.

      One day she approached me and asked if I needed help. I looked at her and smiled a bit. She immediately asked me if this was for my wife. Well, I don’t know what came over me but I decided to seize the moment. I turned fully to her, smiled broadly and simply said, “No, they are for me”.

      OMG!!!! She “SQUEEEE”D”. She got so excited that she was fairly jumping up and down. The thing to understand is that, as an adult, no one inn the world even knew that I dressed. I was about 56 at that point. I was standing there in a nice pair of wool slacks, a tweed waistcoat, a herringbone wool blazer, watch chain and fob, wingtips on my feet and a beautiful grey and black banded Stetson fedora. I mean I could not have looked more “male” if I tried. It was a moment of utter surprise. I kind of expected her to simply nod, point out sizes that might work and then ignore me. It was the total opposite.

      I stood there in wonder and then we started to SHOP!!!! We went through every rack and discussed all sorts of styles. I was experiencing my first gurl’s shopping day!!!! We had so much fun. She was so accepting and so curious about all of it. She was no stranger to CD’s. In fact, I didn’t realize it but that store had more than its fair share of us gurls who shopped there. She asked all about the why’s and when’s and how’s of my dressing. She asked about my wife and her attitudes and she was totally supportive and sweet and giggly.

      I piled up a substantial amount of clothing on her counter that day. I had never felt so free before. Towards the end, when I was paying, I started to cry. I was so happy and filled with joy. She was so sweet about it. I think that, over the last three years, I have spent a few thousand dollars in her shop. I know that the owner appreciated it a lot.

      Well, that is the back story. What I am leading to is that I asked her if I could try some things on. She told me sadly that the owner did not allow males to try things on in the store anymore after one person came in, tried on some clothing and left a “mess” in a pair of panties. That had happened quite a few times so they disallowed it. Still, I have almost always gotten a great haul for there.

      She had a co-worker who was the niece of the owner. I got to know her as well and I got the same reaction. Her and I became even better friends. She was a make-up artist and we discussed make-up all the time. I was supposed to go to her salon and have a make-over and photo session but the holidays came along and we pushed it out… then came Covid. Now, she doesn’t work there anymore. Considering how I dressed for work, she dubbed me “The Dapper Man”. I liked her a lot too.

      I am quite sure that, if I asked if I could show up en femme, that they would have been not only fine with it but would have been so excited…

      BUT…

      I would have asked first. Especially in light of me favoring silicone masks. That could be a bit jarring for them if I simply walked in. They would not know it is me and, in the light of day, it can be a bit jarring unless I get every detail perfect.

      My point is this, once you know they are supportive and nonjudgmental, I feel that it is pretty safe to ask the question. Especially if you have made friends with them. If one is not “creepy” about their dressing, I am coming to understand that there is no shortage of supportive and sweet genetic girls who are delighted to meet Brianna. I say the word “creepy” because the unfortunate truth is that there are some CD’s who are inappropriate. I feel that those ware the ones where this is only a sexual fetish for them. Not everyone who has that fetish is like that but those that do sometimes give us Gurls a bad rap.

      This is a whole different world and the younger people in it (depending on where you live) are so much more accepting.

      There is also the thought that since you are spending so much there that she might be concerned about not losing you as a customer if she were not accepting. However, that is a cynical thought. I think that I prefer to fall on the side that she simply likes you.

      So, when you pick up those shoes, ask her if she would like to meet you as “YOU”!!!! I am sure that she will be, in the very least, interested… but I believe that she will be excited and delighted to meet your female self. Please come back here and let us know how it all went. Good luck Sister.

       

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #519910
      Jeannie Jones
      Duchess
      Registered On: October 9, 2020
      Topics: 11
      Replies: 554
      Has thanked: 1655 times
      Been thanked: 1935 times

      For the store I would just ask her if she would like to see you enfemme on your next visit. For the friend I would take an outfit in the car and ask him if he would like to fool around with you dressed.

      1 user thanked author for this post.
      • #521133
        Natalee Brooks
        Duchess
        Registered On: July 7, 2021
        Topics: 2
        Replies: 16
        Has thanked: 102 times
        Been thanked: 71 times

        Hi Jeannie and Laura,

        When I return home, I should have a new pair of heels waiting to be picked up and that’s what I’ll do.  I’ll ask if she would mind me coming in dressed so maybe we can find me some actual going out clothes and makeup.  All I have is lingerie and there’s a few festivals and parades in NOLA where wearing lingerie is fine but I have only a couple of shirts and jeans that just aren’t really good for going out.  IMO. As far as my friend, I did that Monday and he turned me down but left me with hope, so maybe it’s just not the right time.  Mardi Gras 2022 is coming up soon and he’s never been.  I think that’s when it might happen.  He’s fine with me dressing up for him and he says I’m beautiful but he’s still grieving over the loss of his wife last year. I am respectful and understanding of that too.  We talked alot Monday and cleared the air between us.  It felt good too.  So, fingers crossed, I can at least get my shop keeper to keep helping find my inner woman and maybe even be a better and more thorough woman when he comes down for MG 22.  I’ll follow up next week on my shop friend.  She’s been a breath of fresh air lately being understanding and so helpful finding heels for me since I do wear a size 16 heel.  She’s a wonderful woman and I’m thankful I found her.  Y’all have a great day.  Thanks for all your support and advice. It helps.

        Peace n love 💕,

        Natalee

        1 user thanked author for this post.
        • #521164
          Jeannie Jones
          Duchess
          Registered On: October 9, 2020
          Topics: 11
          Replies: 554
          Has thanked: 1655 times
          Been thanked: 1935 times

          😊💋

    • #519001
      Sutekina
      Lady
      Registered On: January 27, 2020
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 115
      Has thanked: 1493 times
      Been thanked: 368 times

      For store girl, ask if you can show yourself dressed because you want her opinion and advice.

      2 users thanked author for this post.
      • #519895
        Natalee Brooks
        Duchess
        Registered On: July 7, 2021
        Topics: 2
        Replies: 16
        Has thanked: 102 times
        Been thanked: 71 times

        Thank you Sutikena!  I hope it is that simple.

         

        1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #518738
      Laura Lovett
      Lady
      Registered On: March 26, 2020
      Topics: 22
      Replies: 1256
      Has thanked: 3998 times
      Been thanked: 6035 times

      Hi Natalie

      As I know nothing about your situation, I cannot advise on the 2nd issue – but, for the first, there are 2 nice ways to play it:

      First, and this is what I would do, since she knows, you could ask straight out if she would mind if you came into the shop dressed.

      Several years ago, my chiropractor, who has two businesses (the second being a more exotic version of massage!) asked me if I wanted to have a massage from her newest employee, who is a trans girl.

      I declined, for personal reasons, and said straight out that I would rather turn up wearing a dress myself – which, of course, is the truth!

      She laughed long and loud, then said “I’d really like to see that”.

      Naturally, I obliged, much to her surprise and delight, and now she insists that I go to my sessions as Laura, and only calls me Laura in communications and in person.

      Before each session, we have a cup of herbal tea and a girl chat – it’s so lovely to have someone who has completely accepted this side of me!

      The second approach, since she knows, could be just to turn up in your outfit and surprise her.

      If you’re not fully mentally prepared, it could be awkward, so you’d need to be in a calm place inside – difficult when your heart is pounding with adrenaline, but nevertheless exciting, and not as safe as the first option!

      So, it depends on how you want to play it.

      Obviously, I’m only pushing towards what worked so well for me – but I hope this helps, and have fun. I am sure it will be a blast!

      Especially the walk from the car to the shop – assuming you do that rather than go in underdressed and remove the drab in the changing room, although whatever makes it work best!

      Hope it goes well, and DO report back!

      Love Laura

       

      5 users thanked author for this post.
      • #521173
        Brianna Rizzoli
        Duchess
        Registered On: November 10, 2020
        Topics: 6
        Replies: 41
        Has thanked: 124 times
        Been thanked: 195 times

        What a delightful situation!!!!

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