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Well gurls, I didn’t think I’d be out much and I wasn’t. My wife and I needed to clarify a few things, understand each other a bit better, and talk about it all more. I needed to understand better how my choices and actions were affecting her on a daily level, and she needed to understand better how all of this ties in to my personal sense of self worth and how it seems to wrap around my personal set of depression triggers.
I’m deep into my Journaling again, subsumed covering pages a day trying to sort out my thought processes. It helps to put things into actual words, because you can’t write down exactly how you feel if you can’t put it into words, so it forces you to confront yourself and do a spot of self analysis. Those of you who have read much of my previous posts on the topic of depression may remember me harping on Journaling as a useful tool.
One of my wife’s issues with my progression, let’s say, is that I was teaching the point where I was wearing almost a complete female wardrobe even to work, just without much makeup or wig. We’re talking jeans, not skirts or dresses because of the industrial environment of a large shipyard. I was also pushing to go out more often en Femme, and she was missing husband time. She said she was starting to feel like she was watching the man she fell in love with disappear, being replaced by Bridgette. That was never my intent, it just sorta happened, and I had to pull back for a week to get my head straight.
We’ve now come to a better understanding of each other, and codified our boundaries better. She acknowledges my need for partial dressing, and I acknowledge some specific boundaries of how far is too far when in drab. She needs to see Wil after all, not some chick all the time.
So now we’re both happier, and I’ve got some appointments with counseling coming up. She’ll also get some, then we’ll likely both go together for some after a while.
It’s good to be back! I’ve missed you all so very much. This is my safe space for being able to talk to people about all this stuff, and I need you all. ❤
Bridgette
Hi Bridgette, nice to see you back, and especially that you and your spouse have a better understanding of each other, and are will to meet each other’s needs. I’m not pushing my own boundaries, but I do know that for relationships to be successful, both sides have to share their feelings as well as agree to and follow through on the boundaries that each expects. You certainly have an understanding spouse, keep her and keep working out both your feelings.
Hugs
ChloëAll good news Bridgette. So happy that worked out for you the way it did, getting back in equilibrium as it were. I’ll also take yours as a very useful cautionary tale. I can see a lot of myself in your experience. Thank you for sharing.
CAlways put your wife first, then you won’t go wrong. Part of it was pink fog creeping in, and part of it was dealing with mounting stress at work, then that resulting in mounting stress at home because I was going too far and too fast. I was starting to lose sight of what was most important. My wife.
Bridgette
Bridgette…welcome home💐
I think it was a great move to take a step back and sort things out….before it ruined everything wonderful you have both built up.
I can see both sides, your wife ” losing ” her man, and you wanting bridgette more and more…..it’s a very fine line….
I hope you can now go forward, and you will both be happy.
Huggs, grace xx
Always good to step back and look, glad your wife is happier, family is all we have. Welcome back.
Bridgette, I can only imagine the turmoil. It’s actually what I fear most and I don’t think my wife has a boundary, other than, 0%. It wouldn’t kill me to not crossdress, but I don’t think I have the willpower to stop. Hence, Raquel is my secret. I’m glad you and your SO, worked thing out.
Much love,
Raquel
Welcome back Bridgette. It is good to hear you have got things into perspective. I am like you in that I write things down. It can all be jumbled but reading it through again seems to find the important things and it just makes me feel better. I hope you remain strong too and that you find a way forward with your wifes blessings.
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