- This topic has 24 replies, 21 voices, and was last updated 2 years ago by Heather Harrison.
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- November 14, 2021 at 8:10 pm #576177
Well gurls, I didn’t think I’d be out much and I wasn’t. My wife and I needed to clarify a few things, understand each other a bit better, and talk about it all more. I needed to understand better how my choices and actions were affecting her on a daily level, and she needed to understand better how all of this ties in to my personal sense of self worth and how it seems to wrap around my personal set of depression triggers.
I’m deep into my Journaling again, subsumed covering pages a day trying to sort out my thought processes. It helps to put things into actual words, because you can’t write down exactly how you feel if you can’t put it into words, so it forces you to confront yourself and do a spot of self analysis. Those of you who have read much of my previous posts on the topic of depression may remember me harping on Journaling as a useful tool.
One of my wife’s issues with my progression, let’s say, is that I was teaching the point where I was wearing almost a complete female wardrobe even to work, just without much makeup or wig. We’re talking jeans, not skirts or dresses because of the industrial environment of a large shipyard. I was also pushing to go out more often en Femme, and she was missing husband time. She said she was starting to feel like she was watching the man she fell in love with disappear, being replaced by Bridgette. That was never my intent, it just sorta happened, and I had to pull back for a week to get my head straight.
We’ve now come to a better understanding of each other, and codified our boundaries better. She acknowledges my need for partial dressing, and I acknowledge some specific boundaries of how far is too far when in drab. She needs to see Wil after all, not some chick all the time.
So now we’re both happier, and I’ve got some appointments with counseling coming up. She’ll also get some, then we’ll likely both go together for some after a while.
It’s good to be back! I’ve missed you all so very much. This is my safe space for being able to talk to people about all this stuff, and I need you all. ❤
Bridgette
- November 14, 2021 at 8:19 pm #576178
Hi Bridgette, nice to see you back, and especially that you and your spouse have a better understanding of each other, and are will to meet each other’s needs. I’m not pushing my own boundaries, but I do know that for relationships to be successful, both sides have to share their feelings as well as agree to and follow through on the boundaries that each expects. You certainly have an understanding spouse, keep her and keep working out both your feelings.
Hugs
Chloë- November 16, 2021 at 1:04 am #576579
Respect is very important, respecting reach other, the boundaries we set, and each others feelings. Reading back thru my journal entries over the last year, I now see where I got off the rails, and started pushing into unsatisfactory territories. I did it to myself.
Bridgette
- November 14, 2021 at 8:46 pm #576183
So glad to see you back Bridgette!!!
Great to hear that you and your wife have sorted some things out.
Love and hugs, Stephanie 💖 - November 14, 2021 at 8:46 pm #576184
Welcome back.
Hugs, Liara
- November 14, 2021 at 8:48 pm #576186
Hi Bridgette!
Glad to hear you and your wife have gotten things worked out in a way that works for both of you.
Hugs,
Autumn
- November 14, 2021 at 9:18 pm #576190
All good news Bridgette. So happy that worked out for you the way it did, getting back in equilibrium as it were. I’ll also take yours as a very useful cautionary tale. I can see a lot of myself in your experience. Thank you for sharing.
C- November 16, 2021 at 1:07 am #576580
Always put your wife first, then you won’t go wrong. Part of it was pink fog creeping in, and part of it was dealing with mounting stress at work, then that resulting in mounting stress at home because I was going too far and too fast. I was starting to lose sight of what was most important. My wife.
Bridgette
- November 14, 2021 at 9:25 pm #576191
Welcome back Bridgette
Loz
- November 15, 2021 at 1:25 am #576227Anonymous
Bridgette…welcome home💐
I think it was a great move to take a step back and sort things out….before it ruined everything wonderful you have both built up.
I can see both sides, your wife ” losing ” her man, and you wanting bridgette more and more…..it’s a very fine line….
I hope you can now go forward, and you will both be happy.
Huggs, grace xx
- November 16, 2021 at 1:10 am #576581
I believe we’ll be fine. We just needed to take a round turn on our communication and expectations of each other. I also need counseling, she’ll get some too, then we’ll likely both get some together, but we’ll see. First things first as they say. It’s great to be back!
Bridgette
- November 15, 2021 at 1:33 am #576228Anonymous
Always good to step back and look, glad your wife is happier, family is all we have. Welcome back.
- November 15, 2021 at 2:03 am #576230
Thats wonderful, Bridgett, I am glad you were both able to work things through.
Welcome back
Hugs, Regi👸💖 - November 15, 2021 at 2:31 am #576234
Outstanding B.
Diane
- November 15, 2021 at 3:35 am #576260Anonymous
Bridgette, I can only imagine the turmoil. It’s actually what I fear most and I don’t think my wife has a boundary, other than, 0%. It wouldn’t kill me to not crossdress, but I don’t think I have the willpower to stop. Hence, Raquel is my secret. I’m glad you and your SO, worked thing out.
Much love,
Raquel
- November 15, 2021 at 5:28 am #576324
Welcome back Bridgette. It is good to hear you have got things into perspective. I am like you in that I write things down. It can all be jumbled but reading it through again seems to find the important things and it just makes me feel better. I hope you remain strong too and that you find a way forward with your wifes blessings.
- November 16, 2021 at 1:12 am #576582
Reading back over the last 12-15 months I was able to see where I was going wrong, how I got off the track. Journaling is so very useful.
Bridgette
- November 15, 2021 at 6:05 am #576332
So happy to have you back Bridgette. Hoping you BOTH will keep the lines of communication open and find what you both need and want.
. . .Cassie
- November 15, 2021 at 4:17 pm #576482
Welcome back Bridgette!
Alice
- November 15, 2021 at 5:30 pm #576493
Hi Bridgette so happy you are home and things are better in the home front per say.. Keep the communifications going its a winner for you both hugs girl ..
Stephanie
- November 15, 2021 at 11:08 pm #576569
Welcome back Bridgette and good to hear the talking & listening is helping both of you xx
- November 15, 2021 at 11:44 pm #576572
Welcome back Bridgette. Good to hear from you again.
PaulaF
- November 16, 2021 at 2:28 am #576590
Selflessness and plenty communication, so pleased to here. Pyxx.
- November 16, 2021 at 1:02 pm #576692
Dear Bridgette ,
I´m so glad you are back and things are going better for you !
Love Sylvia.
- November 16, 2021 at 2:06 pm #576701
Great to see you back Bidgette!
Commication has played a key part in my relationship with my wife; something to revisit every so often.
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