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Yes, beards. My beard has been a part of my persona for over 30 years. Shaving would be a big and obvious change. Also, I kind of don’t like my face without it. I’d almost HAVE to do SOMETHING else to improve it, and make up is so expensive.
Good to know I’m not alone.
Hey, have you tried Transformation Labs hormone stuff?
I’m trying to find out what works and if I have to see a doctor to start.
I totally understand. I still have zero makeup skills either, but I made the decision to lose the beard (mostly) a few months ago when I realized it was grayer than I really wanted it to be. 🙂
I mostly hated my beardless look at first too, but I’ve grown used to it. (And it grows quickly enough that if I get lazy for a few days, it grows back.) My wife has said she appreciates me being less prickly-faced, too.
Thanks Amy. I appreciate that.
The beard is what keeps me from exploring make-up. That and money. 🙂
I’ve seen guys with beards wearing lipstick and mascara, and cross dressers with beards out in public – and why not?
It’s all about the clothes and getting a look you like, not fitting into other people’s stereotypes.
As long they’re not immoral or involving the hurting of anyone, live your dreams. Dare to be different!
Love Laura
Thanks Laura.
I get what you are saying, but there really is a kind of visual dissonance between beards and that feminine smoothness.
Personally I just couldn’t allow myself to present as a woman with a beard.
That’s just me.
🙂
Yes, definitely money. And time. I wish I had the time to dedicate to learning makeup.
I do agree – it’s a personal style decision. But I’m with you – if I’m going to put the effort into dressing up, the beard sort of breaks the image for me.
Elisa;
My beard was young by comparison as it only go to about 16 years. I eventually got rid of it and succumbed to the siren’s call of looking more femme.
It was the last of the hair “below my nose” that was taken and I struggled for a good six months and then did it one day on a whim knowing that I was having a dermatologist check my skin for ‘concerns’ from the doctor.
Admittedly this happened after I’d attended a local group, and realized that I’d prefer to present fully femme than retain the beard.
On the plus side… Now that I’m older, the lack of beard has been attributed with taking 10 years off my appearance.
-Molly
Elisha,
My hair is military short and a sport a nearly trimmed goatee. My wife adores both, and was not a fan of the result when I explored growing out my hair. I also love my short hair which I have had since high school. The low maintenance of the style being the most appealing aspect.
That being said, neither prevents me from wearing the clothes that I find most comfortable. My preference is dresses and skirts. And aside from work, that is my usual attire. I also do not mask that I am a man.
MacKenzie Alexandra
I shaved my beard around the time I first started dressing up. I’d only had it for something like 2 years at the time, so it wasn’t that drastic of a change… but I do kind of miss it sometimes, and any time when I go without dressing up for an extended period of time (like most of this summer) I let it grow back in.
I guess I’m weird in that I like the way I look as a guy with the beard, but I would never dress up while I had the beard (the only exception was one time when I dressed up before I started shaving again… but with a mask covering the lower half of my face so you couldn’t even tell it was there.) I like guy-me with the beard, but girl-me can’t have one. Something about the clash of male-looking and female-looking features just really bothers me — same reason I’d never take pictures of my legs, chest, etc. while I’m dressed up as Vanessa if they weren’t shaved. Facial/body hair and Vanessa do not mix.
Hi girls
Beards, personally no way, I really need the fully femme look…. ( well, the best I can manage, anyway!!)
For other girls ???….your choice my darlings, I don’t love any of you any less because at the end of the day…there are NO rules…if you feel comfortable, go for it, be yourself…huggs, grace xx
This has never really been an issue for me personally as even at 59 i really cannot grow a beard. i think it is fine for a CD to have facial hair they are just expressing themselves but as you say hard to really get the full femme look with a beard and it seems to me it say i do not want to be a girl just want to dress in woman’s clothes which again is fine and to me is what many CDs want to express themselves in a more feminine way through fashion. Thinking about this question i also thought of women i have know who have pretty heavy mustaches and the judgement and trouble they go through in life and think who am i to judge everyone should be able to express themselves as they see fit and let there own inner beauty shine!
suzette
I had a red van dyke (goatee? Whatever) for decades. Lost it all last year and I love not having it, tho I hate shaving every day…..
Is there a permanent hair removal for use on the face, I would be happy to never have to shave this mug again. Never bothered drab me too much, but drives Stevie nuts!
Stevie
My facial hair is probably my biggest dysphoria trigger. I shave at least twice a day. I don’t judge others on this, we are all free to walk our own path.
Kay
Marlene, I’m in the USA, in Georgia.
Where are you?I too wear a van dyke and I am not shaving it off. Presentation is not a consideration for me because I only fully dress in private, either alone or with people close to me. Any feminine apparel I wear in public is covered by men’s wear. This could change in the future but this is where I sit quite comfortably at the moment. I applaud your decision to keep your beard if that is what you prefer.
I am with you Grace. If you are going to CD as a woman then no beard. I don’t mean any offence to anyone.
Kathleen
I can’t grow a beard to save my life but a weeks worth of stubble has been my mask for 30 plus years. As I have only recently started going out in somewhat feminine clothing I find myself obsessed over removing facial hair but I’m not that practiced at it and I always have 5 o’clock shadow only a few hours later.
I also have a short beard that I’ve had for the better part of a decade. Both my wife and I like it. Like you, it’s definitely part of my male persona. I will sometimes trim it very tight when I’m going to dress at home, but I will shave it completely if I’m going to dress up for a photo session or go out in public and neither happen very often. My rule is that I need at least a day to play in femme to make it worth it. I won’t shave for an hour or two of dress up. It takes about 2 weeks to grow out, which isn’t that long to me. Whenever I dress up, I always take a reference photo of my outfit. At first, having the beard was off-putting for me to see, but now I look through it and just judge how the ensemble is working. I doesn’t bother me anymore.
I don’t shave my body at all, but I picked up a great tip from Jill Marshall on this site. I now use clippers to gradually fade my leg hair from the calf down. I don’t trim it all the way, but down do about a quarter inch. When I’m wearing maxi skirts it looks like my legs are shaved from the shin down. I like it! Here in California, I wear shorts a lot in the summer and I don’t think anyone has noticed.
Marlene. I’m very inexperienced in going out en femme. I don’t know of any special places.
Elisa,
wish i could help, hon, but facial hair is the one curse testosterone did to me. No muscles, no size, but i can grow a beard like a lumberjack. Soooooo depressing. Body hair? Hardly any (yay) but i’ve got a five o’clock shadow richard nixon would bomb cambodia for. If someone knows how to make the face fuzz go away, please, please, please, tell us the secret!
i went to a drag queen contest where they sang, danced and told a story. this was to be the crossdresser queen for a gay bar for the year. the one that won was beautiful in every way except for the over grown chest hair sticking out of her dress. when i think of being womanly, i dont see a hairy body. the other were just as good. i didnt think she should have won.
i have a mustash for 25 years when i wes married. for 25 years she wanted me to shave it off. one day i did and she never noticed. that was before i started dressing. thought id miss it, but i dont. spend alot of money on shavers trying to keep the jungle tamed. i really think if im going to dress like a woman i should be smooth like one. even if im not totally passable.
I don’t like having a beard period. On the other hand I hate to shave my face too. My fiancé got me a nice set of trimmers because of this. Every couple of days I run the trimmers over my face to knock the stubble down a little and I actually shave maybe once every 2 weeks. I would totally do electrolysis on my face so I would never have to shave again. I have no desire to ever have a beard and I like my face smooth but lord I hate shaving.
With all that being said, I love shaving my legs. Go figure. I’m a weirdo.
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