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This has been on my mind and I wanted to share and get it off my chest.
When I was at the ripe old age of 20 I was diagnosed with stage 4 leukemia after an accident at work. I did my research and went through family photos of me and figured out that I had it when I was a pre-teen. What followed was a bunch of tests. I had nuclear medicine scans and a bone marrow biopsy. The Bone Marrow biopsy was the worst pain in my life they can numb you going in but not coming out I passed out from the pain. When everything was said and done the cancer was in my blood, Lymphnodes, and worst of all in my bones. I was given a choice chemotherapy which would be 2hr treatment one week then a week to recover. The rest week I would go back to my oncologist and get a chest xray to keep track. I was told I can refuse and if i did make funeral arrangements. I chose chemo everything you heard about this is true. For 2 days after I could not taste anything, food was bland and the drinks as well. I could only drink water and to this day I hate water. One of the shots they gave me would make you smell stuff that not there I would smell was unreal cakes or those cheap bowl deodorant you hang on the side of the toilet. To this day I can not use a public restroom if those cakes are in there. I did not lose my hair simply because I have psoriasis chemo kills the quick growing cells aka cancer hair etc. Psoriasis grows quicker than hair so the chemo was attacking the Psoriasis and not my hair. When the chemo was done I had to go to radiation therapy it was everyday for a moth if I missed a day I had to start over. That was not as bad It burnt and scared my esophagus my chest was burnt like I had a sunburn. What many people don’t say is the side effects of all this the radiation I asorbed damaged my thyroids, salivary glands, gallbladder, scarred my throat so no girl voice, and major heart damage.
I can not forgive my family tho why you ask? I had no support group I was treated as a burden I was left at my oncologist because my mom and sister in law did not check her messages. They showed up 1hr after the office closed my dad said his treatment take exactly 2hrs I have timed it. Later for christmas and new year the family wanted to goto Mrytle Beach I got permission from my oncologist and we went. On they way there my brother decided he wanted the window open going over the mountains in december he said he was hot. I asked sevral time to please close it the cold air was hitting me in the face and I can not get sic. I was blessed out and told to shut up you brothers hot and your doctor dont know anything. When we got there I was indeed sic all I wanted to do is rest in the room. I was yet again blessed out for not wanting to leave the room and go out and have some fun. I had to chase down my sister every damn night. My mom finally broke down and got me some nyquil I had one cup of it and my sister seen it and took it all. When we went out to eat I was made fun of for not eating allot and wasting money. My siblings and in law picked and made fun of me and made my life hell for the entire time.
Hi Brandie,
That’s a tough road you have travelled – I hope your health is better now. All the stranger because the prevalence of various cancers means that a lot of people will be touched by it in their lifetime.
My wife had breast cancer, got over it, with good friends and family around, and had another 8 or so years before it came back, having spread, and apart from palliative radiotherapy that did for her.
It couldn’t have been more different. So many people expressed concern, and wanted to help, that she had to shut them down and say “don’t worry, I’m sorted thanks”. She didn’t spurn friends at all but made it clear she didn’t want to be overly fussed over by them. She had her own idea of ‘end of life’
Let’s hope your family has an epiphany, if only because one of these days there’ll be one of them in the same position. And they will be so ever so grateful for sympathy and help!
Wishing you all the best.
Marti xxx
I can relate as i too had cancer and went thru Chemo & Radiation. Although I was much older, its still very hard to describe, what you go thru. You are obviously tuff enough with withstand near anything. My compliments to you for coming out of it and now finding a happy place to be.
They say everyone hits a bad spot in the road. I suppose it is what helps make us stronger.
Sending my love
Roberta
Brandie
That’s awful! How can a family be so selfish and unfeeling?
I really hope they wake up and take a good long look at themselves and feel ashamed.
Connie
xxx
Cancer sucks. It’s taken more than it’s fair share of my family. But what’s worse is when your own blood doesn’t care or doesn’t believe the doctors. That being said, it has made you stronger, sister. Keep fighting.
hello and that was very rude of your family to make fun of you and say things, my son had a tumor in his head and was a type of cancer, cannot remember the name of it. but our son had to go to Roswell cancer Hospital every day for 10 min of radiation. 25 min ride there and 10 min of radiation. he had a mini stroke that was caused by this tumor, he was at work when it all happened, they were treating him with mulitple scrois , speeled wrong M.S for short. when i heard about the same day i knew he had a stroke. it took the hospital 5 weeks to figure it out. with all the tests were done nothing was found wrong. 9 days later after being released to go home our son was back in. so they did a brain scan. from there they found it was a tumor. now our son is going though home therapy, then to a hospital for more therapy every other day. his left side went dead kind off. it’s going to be a long road back to recovery. i had open heart in 2010, i am doing great. i wish our son would have had a heart attack and made it through like i did. a stroke kills the left side of your body if the tumor was on the right side, if the tumor was on the left side your right side would go dead. but our son has all the spirits and power to get better and beat this cancer i pray every night for our son to be cured of this and many other people with this cancer. well i hope the best to you and get well. cancer is not a fun thing to have. my mom, my mother-in-law and some other family members have passed away from this. but we all will get something and have to deal with it and be strong and kick it. i have C A D . coronary artery disease, panic attacks, hiatal hernia. well i will pray for you to get better and thank you for sharing your story.
There is a saying ” What doesn’t kill you, only makes you stronger ” i heard it when I was in the Army. It made an impression on me. I hated the Army, but I got through it. My father died of cancer at age 79. He fought it right to the end. My son in law is going through his 3rd bout of cancer. He has been through a lot. Sometimes things happen in your life that there are really no answers for why they happened.
Hi Brandi,
Wow! I can relate, somewhat.
My SO got Hodgkin Disease in her early 20s. She was at stage 4A. She went through chemo and radiation treatment and came out of it well and had a normal life with kids and an odd, but loving husband.
Fast forward 22 years later, she gets the bad news that she now has breast cancer. It was all the radiation she got in her 20s that caused it. She required a double mastectomy.
So, what saved her life the first time gave her cancer the 2nd time.
She’s absolutely fine now. Sure, the psychological scars are still there, but she did have lots of support. I can’t imagine what you’re going through, but I do hope our prayers and love is some consolation for you.
Take care,
Big Hug! Barb
(Having a good cry now… )
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Wow Brandi you’re a tough survivor for sure.
Many of us have terrible families or no families at all which we never had a choice in joining in the first place. I hope you got away from those people who didn’t care about you and are around people who do care about you now.
Hope you continue to be healthy and enjoying each day. Nobody knows what they will have to go through before we leave this dirt ball.
You have my sympathy. I know from personal experience that toxic family members do have an uncanny knack of making a bad situation a damn sight worse.
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