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This has been on my mind and I wanted to share and get it off my chest.
When I was at the ripe old age of 20 I was diagnosed with stage 4 leukemia after an accident at work. I did my research and went through family photos of me and figured out that I had it when I was a pre-teen. What followed was a bunch of tests. I had nuclear medicine scans and a bone marrow biopsy. The Bone Marrow biopsy was the worst pain in my life they can numb you going in but not coming out I passed out from the pain. When everything was said and done the cancer was in my blood, Lymphnodes, and worst of all in my bones. I was given a choice chemotherapy which would be 2hr treatment one week then a week to recover. The rest week I would go back to my oncologist and get a chest xray to keep track. I was told I can refuse and if i did make funeral arrangements. I chose chemo everything you heard about this is true. For 2 days after I could not taste anything, food was bland and the drinks as well. I could only drink water and to this day I hate water. One of the shots they gave me would make you smell stuff that not there I would smell was unreal cakes or those cheap bowl deodorant you hang on the side of the toilet. To this day I can not use a public restroom if those cakes are in there. I did not lose my hair simply because I have psoriasis chemo kills the quick growing cells aka cancer hair etc. Psoriasis grows quicker than hair so the chemo was attacking the Psoriasis and not my hair. When the chemo was done I had to go to radiation therapy it was everyday for a moth if I missed a day I had to start over. That was not as bad It burnt and scared my esophagus my chest was burnt like I had a sunburn. What many people don’t say is the side effects of all this the radiation I asorbed damaged my thyroids, salivary glands, gallbladder, scarred my throat so no girl voice, and major heart damage.
I can not forgive my family tho why you ask? I had no support group I was treated as a burden I was left at my oncologist because my mom and sister in law did not check her messages. They showed up 1hr after the office closed my dad said his treatment take exactly 2hrs I have timed it. Later for christmas and new year the family wanted to goto Mrytle Beach I got permission from my oncologist and we went. On they way there my brother decided he wanted the window open going over the mountains in december he said he was hot. I asked sevral time to please close it the cold air was hitting me in the face and I can not get sic. I was blessed out and told to shut up you brothers hot and your doctor dont know anything. When we got there I was indeed sic all I wanted to do is rest in the room. I was yet again blessed out for not wanting to leave the room and go out and have some fun. I had to chase down my sister every damn night. My mom finally broke down and got me some nyquil I had one cup of it and my sister seen it and took it all. When we went out to eat I was made fun of for not eating allot and wasting money. My siblings and in law picked and made fun of me and made my life hell for the entire time.
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