- September 26, 2021 at 9:08 pm #548800Cece XParticipantRegistered On: April 8, 2020Topics: 34Replies: 152Has thanked: 3433 timesBeen thanked: 1043 times
Going to church on Sunday morning is very important to me. It serves as an anchor for my week, and grounds me in so many ways. I always feel like I am in the right place when I am in church.
My church is a mainline denomination, not fire and brimstone evangelical, so we never hear any talk about alternative lifestyles. On the other hand, I also do not hear any messages that affirm my identity as a crossdresser, nor do I expect I ever will. No one in my church community knows I cross dress.
Does anyone have any POSITIVE stories to share about houses of worship as it relates to crossdressing? Please do not respond with negative church experiences here. I respect that this topic may bring up hurtful experiences, but really I am hoping that our community will celebrate the good and healing experiences that CDs may have had in church.
Total of 29 users thanked author for this post. Here are last 20 listed.
- November 24, 2021 at 8:45 pm #580199Michelle BrownRegistered On: August 23, 2015Topics: 3Replies: 239Has thanked: 5733 timesBeen thanked: 968 times
CeCe,I was raised Catholic,having attended Catholic grade school and Catholic high school.I have not been to Mass since covid started,I am a covid survivor who spent eight days in the hospital,I believe God knows and sees all we do .If God was angry with me I believe He would have told me about my service in VietNam and some very hairy missions.I am still here and He has not said anything to me yet and I know He sees me crossdress .I believe He has shown me how to be more secure in life and how to appreciate the gifts He has given me.I do apologize if I sound preachy,but I know He is ok with my dressing.Now if on that day I meet St Peter first I hope my heels are not too high for him.hahaha lol
- November 24, 2021 at 1:06 pm #580083Araminta PurdyDuchessRegistered On: January 23, 2020Topics: 10Replies: 499Has thanked: 1059 timesBeen thanked: 1889 times
Regardless of one’s beliefs, religious communities are a major means of mitigating the loneliness of individuality and the means to become a valid and functioning member of a definable community. One of the loneliest activities is cross-dressing. (“All dress up and no place to go!”) Thus one’s religious society may well be a major means of not only normalizing one’s desire to be feminine but to present that desire in such a manner as to facilitate the authentication of gender variancy as a valid and reasonable, human state.
I have only read a few stories (the majority of reports) of a successful integration of one’s gender identity into such forms of community that were happy ones. The key seems to be to consult with one’s pastor/rabbi/minister/priest/etc. before any big reveal.
Rhonda Lee wrote above, “A side benefit: I managed to upgrade the dress code of some other congregants who were not into dressy attire until they saw me having such enjoyment from it!” I cannot emphasize enough the importance of this. As cross-dressers, when in public, at this time, we represent and epitomize every other cross-dresser. It is incumbent, then, to present within certain bounds of conventionality. I would not say that a bikini (if you are fortunate enough to be able to convincingly wear one) is out of bounds in certain settings, even ecclesiastical ones, but generally it would be unwise. Also, cross-dressers are often the best exemplars of femininity through athenization and amongst the foremost champions of more decorative and presentable forms of attire consisting of ingenuity and creativity. By being engaged, in feminine presentation, in a public venue perhaps we should be held to another standard than most women. One should be, and be seen as, a lady. At least for now.
- This reply was modified 10 months ago by Araminta Purdy.
- November 24, 2021 at 12:48 pm #580072
- November 16, 2021 at 2:09 pm #576703Jennifer EcclesLadyRegistered On: November 8, 2021Topics: 0Replies: 23Has thanked: 195 timesBeen thanked: 124 times
I’m a member of the local Unitarian Universalist church. While I’m not “out” myself to the community there about my dressing, I personally know several UU members who identify as transgender, and they are unconditionally welcomed and accepted, as indeed anyone LGBTQ would be. It’s a core value.
While Unitarian Universalism may not be everyone’s cup of tea, I do recommend the UU church for those seeking a more open-minded, diverse spiritual community if it’s a local option for you.
- November 16, 2021 at 11:21 am #576680StephanieLadyRegistered On: May 17, 2020Topics: 7Replies: 65Has thanked: 223 timesBeen thanked: 315 times
I love your post here…I am a pastor and have been for years and did become discouraged with the messages, and quite frankly left for a season…I actually began attending again after I began cross dressing again, however when I didn’t look for a cd friendly churches, I looked for one that would fulfill my only desire for the church…corporate worship..I did attend several that made it clear that I wasn’t their cup of tea..so I left..I know that this will be a search but I did attend one in Texas that gave me the most encouragement..during my search I had no problem with any pastor or elder sitting down and discussing this from scripture..all of my argument are exact things this post has discussed..as I said earlier I attend for the worship..which for me includes the ability to dance and use flags, and this Texas church offered the opportunity to do exactly that, so out of respect I approached the leadership and asked them if I could be permitted to use my flags..(how cool that would be to dance in church in a dress)..ultimately they decided against it because the didn’t want to explain or seem to agree with my selection of clothing style especially to the kids, however I can continue to attend so I did..I attended for 5 more weeks..here is where it started to change for me..several young girls came up to me and told me I was beautiful..my god I started crying I was so moved..then a few moms and dads started to warm to me..in the weeks I did attend all of my interactions were positive including to rejection..all of this drove me to one place qnd that was right back into the arms of the father who I know loves me as I am and has not rejected me..quite honestly I find he is more pleased with me as I am now..the most important relationship I have is with the one who gave me a fresh start at the cross..if he isn’t condemning me then why should I accept the condemnation of people..they will not judge me in the end..and the same goes from me..Christ calls us to love as the most important characteristic of my faith and walk with him, it isn’t being in the building.. I now attend church in Vegas and every week I show up I hold up my head, i smile and say hi, then go worship in my dress, and I don’t worry as to whether they accept me..I accept them right where they are..I can now love them because Jesus has taught me how to love myself…
Keep attending keep living life for him and don’t lose yourself in the building lose yourself in Christ
- November 22, 2021 at 10:21 pm #579211SutekinaLadyRegistered On: January 27, 2020Topics: 4Replies: 125Has thanked: 1805 timesBeen thanked: 423 times
I’m a minister as well and I would have answered the same as the church you mentioned, “…didn’t want to explain or seem to agree with my selection of clothing style especially to the kids.” That will probably not be a popular response, but we can’t kid ourselves and allow any and every expression on the planet inside the sanctuary. If the church has established itself as affirming and welcoming people of any respectful attire, then all blessings to you. Notice, “respectful attire.” If you are a nudist and appalled at the thought of having to cover oneself when this is how it was before sin entered the world, you would insist on your expression in the church too. I know Naturist churches exist. But it doesn’t mean that all churches must honour your right to not wear clothes in their buildings. And it doesn’t matter if there’s a group of you raising your voices about it. No one can expect or insist on their rights to a fashion choice. I am a crossdresser through and through. I would refrain if I knew a single person would stumble over this (but it doesn’t stop me from underdressing). “All things are lawful for me,” but not all things are helpful. “All things are lawful for me,” but I will not be dominated by anything.” 1 Cor 6:12. I dare say it would be better to dress in a manner that does not bring any attention to yourself, in either female or male mode. If you really need to dress and receive affirmation so you can move on and TRULY worship, then find a church (where truth is preached) and worship there.
It won’t always be like this. Unfortunately, for our generation and possibly our children’s, we’ll have to suffer through the ignorance. Just look at history. What scandals were created when women began wearing pants? Look back further into history…what scandals were created when women stopped wearing head coverings while worshipping? How long did those scandals last until the church looked beyond those choices and worshipped in peace and unity? How long before LGBT is accepted in mainstream churches? We can wish for it now, but I don’t think it will be in my lifetime.
I’m not saying to give up trying either. We can inform and educate and be learners ourselves. Try not to be overly disappointed when the church you grew up in all your life is not accepting of things they don’t understand. It’s a work in progress. We’ll get there someday.
And by the way, nothing I’ve written even matters.
The only thing that matters is, “When you enter a sanctuary, where is your mind?” Is your mind on the injustices and your inability to express your true nature in your clothing of choice? Or is your mind on God? A time is coming when you will worship the Father neither on this mountain nor in Jerusalem. Perhaps another time is coming when you will worship the Father with either this type of clothing or that type of clothing.
- November 16, 2021 at 8:01 am #576631Barb WireDuchess - AnnualRegistered On: September 16, 2021Topics: 17Replies: 704Has thanked: 4026 timesBeen thanked: 3323 times
- November 16, 2021 at 1:21 am #576584Bridgette VonSmirffLadyRegistered On: October 18, 2020Topics: 49Replies: 1375Has thanked: 19862 timesBeen thanked: 5677 times
I am on a committee at my church to get a congregational vote to officially become a Reconciling in Christ church. I am also out to my pastor as transgender, non binary. My wife isn’t cool with more than the pastor knowing yet, but he’s cool with it. We also have a lesbian couple in the church. Lutheran, by the way. I don’t really want to go to church dressed en Femme as I don’t want people to be focused on me though, that takes away from why we’re all there.
- November 15, 2021 at 11:24 pm #576571Rhonda LeeBaroness - AnnualRegistered On: September 29, 2021Topics: 2Replies: 108Has thanked: 133 timesBeen thanked: 528 times
- November 15, 2021 at 11:04 pm #576567AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
Hello, Cece! It’s about time someone brings up this subject, and I thank you for doing so. Your faith will see you through this, and I know you will find a place to worship freely. I find great strength in Romans 8:
What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? 33 Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. 34 Who then is the one who condemns? No one. Christ Jesus who died—more than that, who was raised to life—is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. 35 Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? 36 As it is written: “For your sake we face death all day long; we are considered as sheep to be slaughtered.” 37 No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. 38 For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
I will be. Praying for you, and your search. If you want to talk, I’m just a click or two away!
- November 15, 2021 at 10:56 pm #576566Elizabeth(Liz)LadyRegistered On: October 7, 2021Topics: 34Replies: 393Has thanked: 2719 timesBeen thanked: 1781 times
I see the many comments and many different views there are on it. Here in Northern Ireland there are a few Churches but not too many are welcoming for people like us. Even if I could crossdress as I like, I certainly couldn’t go to my local Church en fem.It is slowly changing here, but I still believe there’s still a long way to go. Also even if I could I don’t think I would attend a Church en fem. Might go wearing a pair of tights or something under my clothes, but that would be the maximum.
All of us have to do what is right for us.
- November 15, 2021 at 8:43 pm #576561Rhonda LeeBaroness - AnnualRegistered On: September 29, 2021Topics: 2Replies: 108Has thanked: 133 timesBeen thanked: 528 times
As I wrote, MCC offered me a multitude of very positive experiences. The Atlanta church even offered a changing room for those who felt uncomfortable entering en femme and needed a place to change and store clothes. A lady on their admin staff for many years is a CD. More mainline churches that are that welcoming are rare, but you can find lists of “welcoming” churches online, and some of them are truly accepting… i.e., you can easily participate as your femme self, get involved with women’s group activities, attend Bible studies, or whatever you like. At MCC I was more than one of the girls. Women saw me as someone in whom they could confide things they would not likely have even shared with others, even their partners. Being comfortable in your own skin is an attribute that breaks down barriers and fears others would likely have if presenting en drab.
One of my more enjoyable activities at MCC is hosting college students who travel cross-country on their breaks to do charity work. They are hugely accepting and interested in me, as I am in them, and great fun to be around. The experience often ends in a group hug. I marched with other members of my daughter’s Atlanta UGG church in a large Pride parade and have participated in many other enjoyable events there and elsewhere.
Welcoming churches can be found in all denominations…I know both Catholics and Protestants, as well as Universalist and others who may not fall into those categories, who warmly welcome CDs and don’t make you feel the least bit uneasy if attending en femme. I have attended many different churches en femme… universally positive experiences. I Do, however, always learn about the church in advance, as I suspect the majority of churches would not be so approving.
- November 15, 2021 at 5:57 pm #576505Rhonda LeeBaroness - AnnualRegistered On: September 29, 2021Topics: 2Replies: 108Has thanked: 133 timesBeen thanked: 528 times
I am surprised that no one has mentioned Metropolitan Community Church as one very welcoming of all. They are part of the National Council of Churches, accepting of all faiths and are, I understand, the only ones able to offer communion in a way acceptable to all. I discovered them years ago when a tg related a conversion experience there. I was curious. I grew up as a very rigid fundamental… even dogmatic.. Christian… a discussion leader in International Bible Study and Community Bible Study for about 11 years. My wife was a leader also. Then our lives caved in on us and the impossible happened… we divorced, with CDing being central to the reason. It forced me to do what I should always have done… associate with others of different faiths to better understand them than condemn.
I started attending MCC, which is largely populated by LGBT folks with whom I was never before comfortable. It is a “hospital” for those who have been wounded and made to feel uncomfortable attending other houses of worship. I quickly discovered they knew much more about love, acceptance and sacrifice than me.
Yes, I greatly enjoyed wearing pretty dresses to church, and it is fantastic to be warmly welcomed and accepted as Rhonda without any pretense. I became a regular pianist and even played at the invitation of a lesbian couple when they had a “holy union”… basically a wedding, except such was not legal in my state then, so they married in NY a week before the ceremony. One of the brides donated dresses to me and I wore one for the event… a highlight of my life.
The minister once asked me if I’d give a sermon. I had never done this before but was honored. I spoke on the 2 greatest commandments… love your brother and love God. Nearly all religions have some form of the Golden Rule and can relate to this. One must first love one’s self and remove the boulder in one’s own eye before removing the pebble in one’s brother’s eye so as to love one’s brother.
This is what I learned when accepting my CDing. The boulder for me was my inability to appreciate the gift of being a CD… trying to change who I was because I thought I knew more than my Creator. I sincerely apologized to the congregation for the rigid dogma that had led me to be one of those who drove them to find a more welcoming place to worship, who could not love them for who they are.
A turning point for me was when I was asked the question during a Story Corps interview I gave for NPR soon after I realized I was a CD and struggled to accept my inability to change it: “How do you reconcile crossdressing with your faith?” For me apologetics pertaining to Deut. 22:5 miss the heart of the subject. The answer for me is found in the NEW testament, in Christ’s greatest commandments. How can I love my brother if I cannot accept myself as a creature of my Creator, wondrously made and intimately known? How can I fail to accept others who differ from me? Who am I to judge? I no longer feel compelled to try to correct or condemn others for what they believe or how they act and it is tremendously freeing to realize such is not my calling. I think EVERYONE understands certain truths not so visible to others. We are made of many-colored threads. We all need each other; none of us can stand alone, proclaiming ourselves to be the sole arbiter of truth. None of us has all the answers, or needs to. And that is freeing and truly wonderful!
I know faith is an issue that divides. It has guilted many CDs into suppressing who they are and trying to change what cannot change. It can also unify. I have gathered sources to help others like me who have struggled with such issues, often dividing partners. I co-founded a local group of pastors and counselors of various faiths and worldviews who have learned to share their truths with each other and with newcomers to the area seeking a comfortable religious venue. I don’t want to cause division in this group by getting deep into religious matters. But if any face such issues, I am happy to share resources of this nature or converse if you care to PM me. And by all means put on a pretty dress and find an MCC if you want to be truly welcomed while wearing a dress! That is a bucket list item for many CDs.(A side benefit: I managed to upgrade the dress code of some other congregants who were not into dressy attire until they saw me having such enjoyment from it! The women are especially welcoming!)
- September 27, 2021 at 10:00 pm #549409AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
Being raised in a Holiness church, and being pushed into a Fundamentalist youth group was part of my struggle to accept being Bi, let alone my femme feelings.
It was drilled into me from an early age that just the thoughts were a grave sin, and I was to deny, even punish myself for having them. I struggled with shame and guilt for so long.
I never gave up on God though (and I’m certain he never gave up on me) but I did give up on his followers!
I’m currently looking for a church that will accept me as I am, but this area is so homophobic, it may not be possible.
I will keep my faith regardless, and while I am no theologian, I’m sure that I am finally what I was made to be, and God doesn’t make mistakes , or punish us for being what we are.
- September 27, 2021 at 1:38 pm #549180AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
I think the church is a wonderful place I am not a regular church goer. My view is the christian church doesn’t have any problems with us girls, the problem only arises when some of the so called christians show their distaste towards us. They are not true christians in the eyes of god we are all equal.
Love you all
- September 27, 2021 at 1:34 pm #549179Rae SunshineRegistered On: July 16, 2020Topics: 0Replies: 7Has thanked: 2 timesBeen thanked: 53 times
One of the reasons I am responding to this is that I don’t see any clergy responding. I have been a minister for decades. I was serving as a seminarian in a Protestant denomination. I was a very loving church and proved it when a crossdresser in preparation for complete transformation began to attend our services. The only agreement was that the women’s restroom was not to be used until after the transformation was complete. I had not yet started to crossdress but felt a need to befriend such a courageous person.
There is only one passage in the whole Bible (O.T.: Leviticus) that forbids men and women from wearing each other clothes. I am a Christian and not Jewish so I feel no need to claim the O.T. as equal to the N.T. Leviticus also forbids wearing clothes of two different threads; such a prohibition is violated in every church I know of without evil effects.
Jesus used the word “hell” only in situations where he was talking about people who diminish others by their words or lay artificial rules on others to gain control. The Letter of James notes how evil the tongue can be. It is only those person’s who condemn crossdressers who need to fear what judgmentalism is doing to their souls.
Crossdressing gives each one of us pleasure. It does not bring physical or psychological damage to anyone. In fact it is a gift to be able to identify with women in the way that we can. I often remember the words of a contemporary rabbi who said: “since God feels our every feeling, to pass up a pleasure that does not hurt yourself or another is to rob God!” I quote this often when I ask for my dessert to be brought with my meal in a restaurant. If I died during the meal and didn’t have chocolate I would arrive in heaven with a scowl on my face and who wants to do that!! Perhaps if we arrive in heaven in heels and mini skirt God will smile and say: “where did you get that great outfit!”
- November 15, 2021 at 7:41 pm #576548
- September 28, 2021 at 11:20 am #549689LadyRegistered On: January 27, 2020Topics: 4Replies: 125Has thanked: 1805 timesBeen thanked: 423 times
I think the passage you are referring to is Deuteronomy 22:5. But Jesus said he came to fulfill the law, not abolish it. So we can’t discount the OT like that. Everyone would prefer to ignore that verse, but I think you’ll find this explanation encouraging.
Many OT laws are obscure, but it doesn’t mean it’s irrelevant to us. The specific law may not apply, but the principle of the law, the reason it was given, applies to us today. For the clothing with 2 different kinds of threads: the clothes we buy in Western societies are usually pre-shrunken. So when we put them in the dryer, it won’t shrink. If you buy any garment in Asia, bring it home, launder as usual and put it in the dryer, it will shrink. Imagine 3000 years ago and washing clothing. They don’t have dryers, but I’m sure each type of yarn stretched differently.
There’s other passages that talk about disease on the wall. In our terms today, that’s mould. And if it’s inside the walls, you need experts (priests in OT) to come and inspect it. It has to be cleaned and if that doesn’t work, it has to be ripped out…exactly what we do today.
There is a weakness in the English language. Most other languages distinguishes male/female and singular/plural. But in English, the word, “you,” could mean either male/female or singular/plural and you can’t always tell by context. In the Bible, the word “you” is usually plural, but in our individual mindset, we see it as singular. (The promise in Jeremiah 29:11 is plural, to the community, not singular.) What’s more, in Greek, there are 4 different terms for “love” but it’s all translated simply as love. When Jesus asked Peter 3 times if he loved Him, on the 3rd question, the Greek word is different. And this directly relates to De22:5.
De22:5 appears condemning to cross-dressers, but it’s not. The Hebrew word for male clothing and female clothing are different. But, again, English simplifies the translation. The Hebrew word for men’s clothing could be defined as ‘utility’ and for women, it is ‘garment.’ Taking context and applying it to both terms, I re-translated it as, “A woman must not bear arms nor a man don an apron.” If you look at a sample of 10 commentaries on this one verse, you will get at least 3 different interpretations. But the best that I’ve found (that also corroborates with the NT) is an interpretation from The JPS Torah Commentary, where if a man dressed as a woman, he would be able to move freely among the opposite sex in a gender-segregated society. The author explains that it would increase opportunities for forbidden sexual contact with women.
This corroborates with Paul’s comment in the NT that women must cover their heads in worship while men must not. We know from the culture of the time that it was shameful for women not to cover their heads. But the rule for men relates to the principle of De22:5. For the god Dionysius, only women were allowed to serve and observance of this god often included sexual acts. Men could serve too, but only if they dressed as women, and they too would be involved in sexual acts, either with each other or with patrons. The principle of the OT law and Paul’s rule is for Jesus believers not to have the appearance of the worship of other false gods. In 1st century Israel, if a man dressed as a woman, it indicated that she was a priestess for Dionysius. In our context today, I could say, “Don’t use Buddhist prayer beads when you are praying to Jesus.”
I could go on about other obscure laws in OT and how they still apply to us today. But 2 points I want to put out:
1) Don’t discount the OT. Find the principle, or purpose the law was given.
2) I gave an interpretation of Deuteronomy 22:5. Don’t settle on that interpretation for the rest of our life. Keep examining that verse and others because there’s always nuggets of truth we can dig out in God’s words.
- September 27, 2021 at 10:04 pm #549410
- September 27, 2021 at 8:59 pm #549397Rae SunshineRegistered On: July 16, 2020Topics: 0Replies: 7Has thanked: 2 timesBeen thanked: 53 times
To all of those sisters who responded in encouraging ways to my post, I am ovecome with a desire to hug every one of you. To anyone who has ever struggled with this issue, to anyone who has ever been shamed in any way using religion as a weapon, to anyone who has fled organized religion for any reason, I offer this shread of truth: the center of the universe is love, the secret to happiness is giving others happiness, the essence of spirituality is the healing of the broken heart in sacred solitude, the challenge of life is nourishing our souls, the essence of faith is the blending of reason and emotions into intuition, the path to heaven is to never hate, the cross that we must carry is to challenge what is efficient by standing for what is nurturing. Our gift to the world is our ability to empathize with another gender. Empathy is a muscle that when it goes undeveloped leads to building walls and hating those who are different. If we can reach over a gender barrier then there is hope that other barriers can be crossed. I refuse to give up hope that tomorrow will be better than today, that hatred will not have the last word, that those shamed by little minds today will be proven to have a far greater impact in shaping tomorrow than those who shamed them. Many blessings to all of you, RAE
- September 27, 2021 at 8:19 pm #549378Liara WolfeLadyRegistered On: August 14, 2021Topics: 3Replies: 1607Has thanked: 3155 timesBeen thanked: 5432 times
- September 27, 2021 at 8:26 pm #549381Rae SunshineRegistered On: July 16, 2020Topics: 0Replies: 7Has thanked: 2 timesBeen thanked: 53 times
If I can lift any burden that anyone is carrying for a minute or hour or forever then I have done what I believe is my mission in life. My favorite verse comes from the 22 chapter of Luke. Jesus says to his disciples: “I am among you as one who serves.” If my words have given you a bit of truth, a moment of joy, a new way of looking at something then I am made happier by your response. Thank you. Rae
- September 27, 2021 at 7:01 pm #549338Raquel SmithLadyRegistered On: August 26, 2021Topics: 19Replies: 912Has thanked: 3057 timesBeen thanked: 3005 times
- September 27, 2021 at 8:27 pm #549383
- September 27, 2021 at 11:25 am #549130BrielleDuchessRegistered On: August 14, 2021Topics: 6Replies: 487Has thanked: 2444 timesBeen thanked: 2053 times
My daughter goes to a church in DC that is totally affirming to all LGBTQA people that want to worship. My wife and I have attended a couple of times and I can see nothing amiss. It’s called The Table Church https://thetablechurch.org/ and here is the link if anyone is interested.
If I lived in DC this would be my church, for sure.
- September 27, 2021 at 11:01 am #549118Liara WolfeLadyRegistered On: August 14, 2021Topics: 3Replies: 1607Has thanked: 3155 timesBeen thanked: 5432 times
I have not attended church for awhile but I am a Christian. I did struggle with my faith and CDing for a long time. I finally came to accept who I am, a Christian Cross Dresser.
- September 27, 2021 at 6:03 am #548986Raquel SmithLadyRegistered On: August 26, 2021Topics: 19Replies: 912Has thanked: 3057 timesBeen thanked: 3005 times
This touches on perhaps the deepest topic we will ever discuss.
And the straight answer is, I haven’t any personal positive stories about a place of worship embracing CDing or Transgenders, but I haven’t gone looking.
I worship under the Catholic Faith. I recognize that I do so because I was raised Catholic. My spirituality, though, is guided by the principle that God is Love.
Over the years, I have reflected on my relationship with God and I have come to the conclusion that I simply do not believe that one has have the same structure in their relationship with God as I do, in order to attain eternal life with God, which is what I strive for.
That also means, that the God I believe in would not condemn someone who is a “good” moral person. Actually, evil people condemn themselves.
I believe that God has presented himself/herself/themselves in as many ways as possible to bring as many people to them.
Even if one declares oneself agnostic or atheistic, but is good, I would hope that I would be with them in the afterlife.
I refuse to accept anyone’s assertion that my crossdressing harms my relationship with God. I am not damaged by actions that harm no one. I may be damaged by other things, but CDing isn’t one of them.
I could go on , but I hope I have made my point.
I would be happy to discuss this further with any of you.
- September 27, 2021 at 4:25 am #548908Michelle DavisDuchessRegistered On: August 19, 2021Topics: 12Replies: 125Has thanked: 1332 timesBeen thanked: 603 times
I often fantasize about being able to wear a pretty dress and heels to church services and being accepted and welcomed. Don’t know why but it’s probably my jealousy of how great the ladies look that dress for church.
- September 27, 2021 at 7:03 pm #549339LadyRegistered On: August 26, 2021Topics: 19Replies: 912Has thanked: 3057 timesBeen thanked: 3005 times
- November 16, 2021 at 7:20 am #576626Kayla OlsonLadyRegistered On: June 15, 2020Topics: 1Replies: 107Has thanked: 924 timesBeen thanked: 366 times
I agree 50%. There are some ladies and even a few guys that dress up. At the church I attend in south Florida. Generally, ladies dress up more than the guys but a large portion of the congregation, both men and women do not dress up. If I went dressed up I would go wearing a cute dress, pantyhose and high heels.
As it is, in drab mode I were a nice t-shirt or polo shirt with shorts or slacks and sneakers.
- September 27, 2021 at 8:32 pm #549384Octavia LongLadyRegistered On: January 31, 2021Topics: 67Replies: 147Has thanked: 972 timesBeen thanked: 1203 times
Born and raised Catholic. I married a Methodist and grandparents never came to the wedding. Her grandmother told her to never marry a Catholic. We were such rebels. I still don’t think that I can dress from church.
- September 27, 2021 at 4:04 am #548876Hope RobertsBaronessRegistered On: May 24, 2021Topics: 0Replies: 32Has thanked: 20 timesBeen thanked: 145 times
I attend church regularly also and am an active Catholic in my church. Nobody has any idea that I am a TG/CD. This as you said is a difficult issue for us to deal with. In many aspects, I too find myself wondering “why” I am like I am? God does not make mistakes. We did not do something wrong. Yes God created us male and female, but all of us have chromosomes of the opposite sex.
I try to thank God for who I am and for Him to keep my desires to explore womanhood healthy. I came out to my wife (after a layoff of 10 years) again a year ago and she has embraced the “new me” and we have gone out shopping many times as girls and have a blast. She says I look like a woman and walk like a woman.
So are we “wrong” to explore our femininity? Does this make us better husbands, caregivers, workers, neighbors? I think the core question we have to ask ourselves is “are we trying to be a better version of ourselves and allowing God to move within us to deepen our relationship with Jesus?”
I know the Catholic Church is very clearly anti gay/CD/TG. But I also know that I am loved and forgiven and able to ask for mercy each Sunday as I reflect on how much I love Jesus and need Him in my life.
Here is my 2 cents on this difficult subject.
- September 27, 2021 at 1:07 pm #549173MichelleLadyRegistered On: October 14, 2020Topics: 0Replies: 35Has thanked: 10 timesBeen thanked: 185 times
My reply to God doesn’t make mistakes is you are right. God knew me before I was created in the womb, and God knew I would be transgendered. My belief is God placed this on me to see how I could use this to glorify God. I think that if I can show someone that, no matter how the world views us we are loved more than anything we can imagine.
Also as a side note, God said let us create man in our own image and likeness. God is not gendered. Found that interesting.
- September 27, 2021 at 3:57 am #548875Jamie WilliamsLadyRegistered On: July 26, 2021Topics: 15Replies: 132Has thanked: 311 timesBeen thanked: 982 times
Church is also a very big part of my life. I can’t say that I’ve had any positive experiences, as nobody at my church knows of my dressing. However, As Mary Jane said, it’s not about what I’m doing but what Jesus did. My church is very accepting of flawed people. That is why the church exists. The challenge is to find a place of worship that accepts a person regardless of a behavior that they may not approve of.
- September 27, 2021 at 3:49 am #548873Peta MariLadyRegistered On: September 30, 2020Topics: 29Replies: 571Has thanked: 914 timesBeen thanked: 2878 times
I’m a church goer. And conservative, somewhat fundamental Christian.
I don’t try and reconcile / excuse my cding with my faith. I don’t believe its “the best for me.” But instead recognise something is broken in my psyche. If I wasn’t broken, I wouldn’t hide. As cds we tend to hide from self, family, friends, society, church, other forms of fellowship. Even on here, we hide using anonymous names, and photoshoped pics (some anyways.) And or no pic, and no profile.
Within my faith understanding its not what I do, but instead is on what Jesus has done. Everything else falls under that. That covers every thought, word, and deed. Including those not thought, not said, and not done.
- September 26, 2021 at 9:33 pm #548809Stephanie RobertsDuchessRegistered On: May 20, 2020Topics: 24Replies: 1227Has thanked: 11014 timesBeen thanked: 4843 times
Like you Sunday church is an important part of my life.
I attend a Pentecostal church which doesn’t know about my crossdressing.
It is a great community of people and I have some really great friends there.
Love and hugs, Stephanie 💖
- September 27, 2021 at 8:55 am #549083AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
So am I, and my church folks don’t know about Bettylou, either. I had a brief internal struggle when I realized that I’m a CD, but quickly came to terms with it. Doing nothing illegal,causing no harm, and I am at peace with Bettylou.
- September 27, 2021 at 10:30 pm #549416Stephanie RobertsDuchessRegistered On: May 20, 2020Topics: 24Replies: 1227Has thanked: 11014 timesBeen thanked: 4843 times
- September 27, 2021 at 10:30 pm #549417Stephanie RobertsDuchessRegistered On: May 20, 2020Topics: 24Replies: 1227Has thanked: 11014 timesBeen thanked: 4843 times
- September 27, 2021 at 8:53 pm #549394LadyRegistered On: January 31, 2021Topics: 67Replies: 147Has thanked: 972 timesBeen thanked: 1203 times
Bettylou legality can change with a stroke of the pin. Two of my guns that I bought legally are soon going to make me a felon. I have only shot them both one time and then cleaned and put in them in a safe. Mans laws are very flexible. I believe in Gods laws. They are not flexible. If you throw a brick straight up in the air it might hit you in the head. Gods law is that brick will come down. I do agree with you for the most part but mans laws are flawed.
- September 27, 2021 at 9:08 pm #549400AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
The 18th Amendment and the Jim Crow Laws validate your argument; but I was speaking to the act of being a CD. Dressing is not a crime anywhere in Western society, and any attempt to make it a crime would be quickly rebuffed.
You are so right about gun laws (all of which violate the 2nd Amendment); I have a shotgun which became a “Destructive Device” by the stroke of a pen in 1994. I didn’t lose it, but it is now an NFA registered device, just like a machinegun.
- September 27, 2021 at 3:07 am #548859
- November 24, 2021 at 1:39 pm #580104LadyRegistered On: January 27, 2020Topics: 4Replies: 125Has thanked: 1805 timesBeen thanked: 423 times
A great book that almost nobody will read is, “Exclusion and Embrace, Revised and Updated: A Theological Exploration of Identity, Otherness, and Reconciliation,” by Miroslav Volf. He said, “Let us cast out exclusion and embrace those who do not fall within our narrowing circle of comfort.”
Another book that all ministers should read is, “Is Your Church Too Comfortable,” by Mark Buchanan. He doesn’t address transgenderism, but there’s a chapter on a lesbian couple who wanted to join his conservative church. He said to them that there’s so many liberal churches to choose from, why his? They said it was the kind of church they grew up in. I won’t give you anymore details, but it does have a positive outcome.
- November 24, 2021 at 1:29 pm #580099LadyRegistered On: January 27, 2020Topics: 4Replies: 125Has thanked: 1805 timesBeen thanked: 423 times
Thank God, you were lead to a place of healing. Kudos to you for not giving up either.
I met a grandma, who for the last 3 decades thought she was lost and going to hell because after a divorce, the Catholic church excommunicated her. Amazing how such crimes against humanity continues to this day. Absolutely nothing in the Bible about God rejecting sinners.
I’m against divorce, BUT I’m pro-life. If a woman is facing physical, mental, or emotional abuse, get out of there!
- November 24, 2021 at 1:16 pm #580087Araminta PurdyDuchessRegistered On: January 23, 2020Topics: 10Replies: 499Has thanked: 1059 timesBeen thanked: 1889 times
The only reason that I can see why some people get so upset about cross-dressing is fear. When people have strong beliefs these beliefs give them a sense of security and certainty in their sense of the Universe and their place in it. When those beliefs are challenged they fear that loss of security and they panic. This applies to far more than cross-dressing.
For example, most males regard themselves as ‘heterosexual’. When they see another male being feminine and they find that male attractive they question their own sexuality and that really frightens them.
Open cross-dressing, when feasible, can alleviate those fears by allowing a wider understanding. It won’t be easy but it can be done.
- This reply was modified 10 months ago by Araminta Purdy.
- November 24, 2021 at 12:03 pm #580054Elizabeth(Liz)LadyRegistered On: October 7, 2021Topics: 34Replies: 393Has thanked: 2719 timesBeen thanked: 1781 times
Bobbi I understand your views entirely, but that shouldn’t put you of going to your place of worship.
Still only you can decide what you want to do.
People don’t know I’ve these inclinations but even I’ve been badly treated by people I thought where friends in Church. I don’t go to Church to please anybody, I’m not looking for approval from them. I go to Church to worship, praise and thank God for what he’s given me in life. That should be our main focus.
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