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  • #567060
    Amiliah Rougeheart
    Participant
    Registered On: October 29, 2021
    Topics: 1
    Replies: 5
    Has thanked: 2 times
    Been thanked: 33 times

    Late last night October 30th and earlier tonight Halloween night I had a coming out party and it was incredible….

    Hello everyone I’m Amiliah Rougeheart, I’m a rather new cross dresser even though I’m in my thirties and I have an experience I would like to share with you all since I am still a flutter about it. As the header and title suggests I had a coming out party, I had been doing some research and inquiries by that I mean I was getting people’s views on Cross Dressers and Sexual Transitions, and testimonials from others that are further along than myself. So after some careful deliberation I decided to talk to each of my friends, supporters and family members individually about how they would feel and what would they think of me if I were to decide to cross the great gender divide, I being publicly bisexual was easy but coming out as anything more would naturally be difficult, and would get me mixed emotions, various reactions. So after two weeks of  “negotiating the peace talks” I finally worked up the courage to out myself. So I went online and rounded up all of my friends and closest confidants, and I told them they are important to me but that my life was about to change and that in my mind it’s for the better. So on October 30th 2021 during a friend’s live stream session I outed myself to everyone of my friends and got abundant support  and was dedicated the rest of the stream with songs to encourage my decision and images of femininity and beauty which I did not expect, unlike the day before, that led to an end of the world fight with my blood sister to whom there is a chance I will never talk to again, mind you she gave me her support for my decision but still ended our estranged relationship because of some other matters.
    Anyway there were only two who had anything negative to say. And I was filled with joy.

    Now it came time to tell my family…

    With great Anxiety I confronted my catholic step mother about the subject matter and I talked to her indirectly about my decision I told her how my niece had transitioned and what did she think of transgender people and gender reassignment and cross dressing. She told me that as far as cross dressing to each their own if it makes me happy she is for it, then on the more intense matter she put up a wall of resistance saying “I think it is unnatural, God made us the way that we are for a reason only he knows but no matter how much we oppose him he knows best and doesn’t make mistakes, we as people do!” Then a strike of hostile curiosity in her voice why are you asking me about this, are you planning to change??! I gave her the most honest answer I could give her…No! I’m not planning to change yet, I plan on cross dressing to feel more comfortable with myself because I like feeling pretty and I like women’s clothes and always have they are comfortable to me, but gender reassignment has been on my mind for some time because I am afraid of the judgements I will get from cross dressing if I do stand out to much…. I say that out loud while I start to reflect on past experiences internally….in my head I think “ that moment was traumatizing to me and I never want to feel like that again….” “What if cross dressing isn’t enough to make me feel like myself, I do want to transition but how far is to far, after all this decision is permanent and can’t exactly be undone I want to go into it with no fear and come out of it with no regrets I best do some more research and contemplating!” But I felt encouraged over all by the positive feedback from al my peers and and friends, all my siblings were behind me though I have yet to talk to my youngest brother who is like my oldest son since there is 20 years 2 months and 3 days between us not to mention he is 3 years 2 months  and 14 days between him and my actual oldest son, I will talk to the babes in due time for now I just have to ease into she situation and let them open up to it.

    So there you have my coming out party story I hope you find joy and comfort in it as I do knowing that we need not be afraid to come out as who we really are because you never know what you can do until you try and you can’t assume other people’s reactions or where  you will find support as they say in the network marketing industry “ invite everyone even if you don’t think they will say yes, you never can tell who is actually gonna support you and you will be pleasantly surprised when they do, and if you get a no it is never a definite it just means not right now if your product is truth everyone comes around eventually, narrow minds can be opened, crossed arms uncrossed, and locked doors unlocked, opportunities are everywhere and they are a knocking.”

Viewing 7 reply threads
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    • #573994
      Amiliah Rougeheart
      Lady
      Registered On: October 29, 2021
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 5
      Has thanked: 2 times
      Been thanked: 33 times

      Hello to all thank you for all your support and encouragement, it has been wonderful having such a warm welcoming and such a great support group. You all eased the process. Now I would like to give you all an update to my situation…

      October 30th was my coming out party, now it’s November 9th and after coming out and having a couple of intense arguments with my family about my new identity and respective life choices, my wife took back her ultimatum to take her and my children out of my life if I started dressing like a woman in public, and is now saying if it is what I want to do she is fine with it so long as I keep it a secret from my children and her family and she doesn’t have to see me that way and she doesn’t hear talk of it around town, “for my sake and the sake of my family”, since we are moving from Accepting California to Old fashion Missouri in 3 days time and moving in with her family’s house they are not exactly the most accepting of people (a little racist and very homophobic, anti trans and very strongly opinionated). I feel very distraught because all my efforts to become brave enough to come out was all for not now that I have to put my new found self back in a box in the closet to only see the light of day when no one is home and won’t be for hours, or in public far far away from the house so long as I change after leaving the house and before I get back and with no one they know so it doesn’t get back to her family. That whole concept strips the legitimacy of my decision to be who I really am and my sexual and gender identity. I would appreciate feedback, and thanks again in advance for your time, comments and support.

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #570150
      Stephanie Bass
      Princess - Annual
      Registered On: November 30, 2019
      Topics: 16
      Replies: 2549
      Has thanked: 34395 times
      Been thanked: 8758 times

      Hi Amiliah Nice to meet you and your wonderful coming out party you are so brave as im one of the hens in this bunch to family that is..  Came out to wife just after we were married which now been 38 years  but as for family  way to much non support things and community people around us will never happen love my wife to death but if i were outed to family or friends it would be a hard moving process to another hidden area  but for you so happy its starting to go your way  good luck girlfriend and happy you joined us girls here..

      Stephanie Bass

      1 user thanked author for this post.
      • #573976
        Amiliah Rougeheart
        Lady
        Registered On: October 29, 2021
        Topics: 1
        Replies: 5
        Has thanked: 2 times
        Been thanked: 33 times

        Thanks for the encouragement.

        1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #570124
      Autumn Valiant
      Duchess
      Registered On: July 14, 2019
      Topics: 44
      Replies: 1261
      Has thanked: 20382 times
      Been thanked: 3711 times

      Hi Amelia!

      Love your names!

      Welcome to CDH!

      Congrats on the coming out party! Absolutely wonderful. I think you are very brave. I can tell because I am a chicken. (Insert hen noises here. Can’t use “cock-a-doodle-do” since that’s the rooster’s voice)

      It always amazes me…..

      CD/TG : “I’m a crossdresser/Transgender”

      Self proclaimed religious person : “You are acting in a way that is contrary to how God made you!”

      CD/TG : “God made me this way. I am acting exactly how God made me.”

      Perhaps in time your sister will have a change of heart.

      Hugs,

      Autumn

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #567376
      Amiliah Rougeheart
      Lady
      Registered On: October 29, 2021
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 5
      Has thanked: 2 times
      Been thanked: 33 times

      Thank you all for your lovely comments, and support but I don’t think myself as brave just yet but I’m one step closer to becoming truly brave.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #567168
      Sarah Du Hessisse
      Lady
      Registered On: September 16, 2020
      Topics: 28
      Replies: 815
      Has thanked: 5580 times
      Been thanked: 3240 times

      Hi Amiliah

      Well done you for being honest and open, my very best wishes to you I hope everything turns out how you wish.

      Love Sarah

      xx

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #567077
      Abbie Normal
      Duchess
      Registered On: June 13, 2021
      Topics: 13
      Replies: 622
      Has thanked: 1171 times
      Been thanked: 2530 times

      Congrats Amiliah! It sounds like an overall positive experience. Families are complicated anyway so a little turbulence is to be expected.

      — Abbie 🥰

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #567076
      Angela Booth
      Lady
      Registered On: August 1, 2020
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 616
      Has thanked: 1594 times
      Been thanked: 2964 times

      I can share with you as I did the same. I had planned it, aborted it and replanned. I hoped for the best, expected the worst and took what came. The acceptance was overwhelming and, like you, there were doubters, but they still accepted me and I didn’t lose any of my family or friends and made even more over time. It is a great experience to share.

      I am so happy for you.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #567068
      Michelle Trott
      Duchess
      Registered On: April 7, 2021
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 368
      Has thanked: 764 times
      Been thanked: 1661 times

      Your a brave girl. I hope it works out well for you.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
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