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Are you strictly a Crossdresser or will you Transition.
Strictly a Crossdresser.
At the age of around 16 or 17 the thought of exploring transitioning was nagging away at the back of my mind but looking back I was never serious about it.
I had loads of time on my hands and every opportunity I got to dress I took. I got more and more daring and confident when dressed so maybe that was the reason I was thinking of taking things further.
Then I got a job, girlfriends followed and loved my sport. Had a great time into my 20’s. Love being a man, dad and husband but still love my girly time too.
I’m strictly a Crossdresser…now. There was a time (a long time ago in a life far far away), where I seriously considered transitioning, looking into therapists, doctors, costs, procedures, time involved, and reading about a number of successful transsexuals. If things had gone differently in my life, I might have at least started transitioning. But life didn’t work out that way. I married, had a child, divorced, and wound up with (eventually and fully desiring) custody of that child. Being a single parent makes you seriously reconsider major life events. So, I married again (this time it took!) had some more kids, and now I’ve come to accept where I am. I think I still have a few years left to work and enjoy my desires, so I’ll stay what I now am.
There was one moment that might have changed my life. I got a degree from a well known university and at the same there was professor in another department who had previously transitioned but kept it quiet. Eventually, upon reading alumni news I discovered who it was and if I had known about her I might have looked her up and talked to her. Sometimes all that is needed is a little encouragement from someone else. Facing the unknown by oneself can be disheartening at times. I’m glad there are places like here. Maybe if they existed back in that distant (galaxy and) past, things might have been different for a lot of us.
i would transition tomorrow but i have hurt my wonderful wife enough for a lifetime
I would love to transition but im afraid. I don’t know what I’ll do. I have a young son and now his mom and me aren’t together. She doesn’t accept any of this. I have a very good business and career though too but have thought seriously about selling everything including my house I own clear which would give me a very significant amount of money going away for a couple of years or a bit more fully transitioning though I don’t think I’d get bottom surgery but I would do everything else to make me look as much a genetic woman as possible and then slowly easing back into my business as a completely different person and hoping nobody would realize who I was
When I was young, I was such a misfit in the guy world that I wondered whether I was “supposed” to have been a girl; but I did OK for the next 60-plus years as a guy. Now, my age and medical history make it impossible; otherwise, I would be thinking about it, at least. Never know for sure what my answer would be.
Bettylou
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Hi Kathleen !
I selected cross-dresser only. I have been spending plenty of time wondering if my upbringing had been different would I perhaps have felt different if I could have embraced the feminine things as a child and what if I had at least an open minded parent who was willing to let me explore some things….. There is no way to tell. I only know that I suppressed any feminine feelings and desires for so long and I that I was wrong for feeling that those desires were wrong and so it goes round and round.
There is something I am sure of….. I really need that white dress with the pink flowers….. and shoes….. omg the shoes….
Hugs
Autumn
Autumn
Hey girl!! Are we dreaming about a white dress with pink flowers again!! “Oh you silly ”
Very pretty indeed 😁…
Autumn,
I feel much the same as you; from the age of 7 on, I grew up in an all-male environment. Seven cousins, all boys, and Bettylou still lurked in the background. In hindsight, I have to wonder, what if…?
I am a crossdresser only because I enjoy certain parts of being a male. My feminine side comes out when I dress but has to go back in as no one knows other than the ladies on this site. I may have thought about transitioning earlier in my life and I tried some aspects of the female life but due to my age and family situation I am perfectly content just crossdressing.
Definitely on the path to transitioning but I expect I will not go the whole way.
For now I’m just a cross-dresser, if something transpired in the future where as I could transition I would do it without hesitation, I think my female side is getting stronger the older i get, when I read a magazine i always look at the female fashion’s first when I’m out shopping I’m always looking in the shop windows at the women’s fashion’s, it’s something i would never have done many years ago, well no one can predict the future we shall see what happens when it happens xxxxx
Like so much inside my head I am quite conflicted about this, and I didn’t vote. I’m not sure I’d ever go all the way, but right now, this second, if there were no consequences (yeah right…) I’d love to have the curves, the boobs, the smooth skin, no annoying shaving of the beard, and still be able to wear wtf I liked (in this fantasy world I would like to keep my man parts, and my wife…. 🤔. All other parts of my life/hobbies/work etc are easily compatible with this)
S x
I would if I could but at my age, it won’t happen. I basically live as Coral 24.7 I have a fairly nice relationship which allows me more freedom to be me. We shop and dine together and most of our friends are also very accepting. I hardly ever wear male attire and I recently pierced my right ear and wear earrings almost everywhere now. If I were younger I would but I am very grateful to have these freedoms. Better late than never I guess.
Actually, “None Of The Above” would be appropriate.
I have essentially transitioned, socially. My identification is transgender, non-binary. The only thing left would be a name change, but that would cause too much confusion I think. I am dressed 80% to 90% of the time when I leave the house. The vast majority of people here know me as DeeAnn. Very few have met Don, who sometimes appears as a matter of convenience. I have no plans to physically transition as I don’t have dysphoria, fortunately. However, what I came to realize is that I am a combination of male and female energies, personas, or whatever you choose to call it.
DeeAnn,
It seems there many girls here in the same situation: Socially TG, but barred from any action by age and/or medical history. And I don’t think it’s all about dysphoria. Can you be a girl without being transformed into one? I believe so.
I already have mentally but due to age and medical history I can’t.
Strictly a crossdresser. I’m happy at home to just change my pants into a skirt, and sometimes my top into a more feminine top (I’m usually wearing a woman’s top that is close enough to unisex that people don’t notice). I don’t need a bra, breast forms, makeup, or to do something with my hair. But I’m just as happy if I do some or all of these. If I go out, I definitely go all the way. But it doesn’t bother me when my (adult) children call me Dad. My daughter will call me Alison if we are out in public, because she understands not to embarrass me. But at home I’m still Dad and I’m happy with that too.
Another friend who started coming out in public and later decided to live full time en femme once said “What’s the difference between a crossdresser and a transgender? About 3 years.” But after 10 years of being seen by others, I still have no desire to transition. So it may be true for some but not for everybody.
Stictly a crossdresser… I may be “underdressed” almost 24/7, but the “male me” comes through at least 80% of the time.
The balance… when I can, (and especially these days with the BUG), is pure Catherine Louise Ryan.
Eventually……. The “bug” will pass and Caty will come back with a vengeance.
Happy dressing
Caty
None of the choices are a good fit for me. I consider myself gender fluid.
I feel more comfortable presenting as a female. I’ve had laser hair removal, my brows are shaped androgynously, and supplements have given me small man boobs. I experience dysphoria when I haven’t dressed in a while. I’ve thought about transitioning many times and can’t rule it out.
However, I’ve grown accustomed to many of the things being a guy affords me. It would be hard to give that up. Decades of social conditioning did that. I’ve always felt like an outsider in guy circles, and I have no interest in living the life most guys want. It’s like I’m role playing for the sake of convenience. I’m okay with that. Switching between genders works for me.
Emily
Hi Kathleen i do not believe i could of answered this question in the past because i just did not know what i was considered. My teenage years i was considered a IT. Yes I T. The term crossdresser some how i never connected to in the past but now i do.. Maybe a crossdresser considering transition some how strikes a cord with me now. I would like to look more feminine naturally. Sounds strange but thats what i would like. I want my waist to be smaller or least to shift stored fat to my hips and thighs. I would love it if my hair would stop receding and maybe start to grow. I am just not ready to have my breast grow. I am not sure why. That is the one thing that is holding me back from requesting HRT. Maybe not ready yet to commit yet. So Crossdresser considering transition fits me the best right now. Maybe labels do have value. . Enjoy the gift of femininty it is what makes us special luv Stephanie
I voted I’m a Crossdresser only, which I think describes me well. There is a However to this. There are times when transitioning seems rather attractive to me. In particular I’d love to have my own breasts.
Another poster said about fat redistributing itself to my hips and bum, though I don’t have much belly fat, but it would be nice to have a femme figure without having to use shapewear all the time
Several things are stopping me. I do still like being a man in a lot of my life, and do have a bit of an established male persona in some aspects of it. That would be a tough bridge to cross. Plus my wife of many years wouldn’t like it very much. She doesn’t mind my dressing, and we go together sometimes, but to change gender, that would be too much for her.
Then there’s having the medical procedures. Call me some kind of a chicken, but I just had a small operation on my hand, to correct a long developing problem, and I was basket of nerves for the couple of weeks before hand. So with what I’d have to go through with SRS, I don’t know if I could do it.
Though I think that if I really was unhappy with being male, I would know it by now, and all those things stopping me would simply be bridges I need to cross, instead of reasons I can’t do it.
So, for my foreseeable future, I will just fantasize about having a beautiful female body.
Amy
Wow, what a topic. For me, I dress almost daily, but not out or and I am not out to anyone. I think it may get to a point where I would want to live fulltime, but with FFS (perhaps), hair removal (whatever I could afford it all), perhaps HRT, but the FINAL surgery, not sure about that. I have been searching for a therapist (on hold now, of course) to help me through. I know JaiymeLynne makes me whole. Having the support and outlet here is a wonderful thing. So I do think of transitioning, but there is more to learn about myself before that committment is made, at this stage of my life. Thanks for listening.
JaiymeLynne
Although I selected “I want to transition”, it doesn’t mean I can transition. As a healthy 62 yo, I know I can handle the physical rigors of transitioning but I don’t know if I can handle the psychological trauma of hurting those in my immediate circle and that trauma of being cut off. Being married and having adult children and little grandchildren is both a blessing and, in a twisted way, a curse. If I was single, no issues right? How times were different growing up on the 60’s and 70’s. My childhood had a dreadful impact on me as well which influenced how I viewed myself then and how I progressed through life during my early adulthood into my later years. Where is the “reset” button?
I don’t see myself as a crossdresser or a trans anything.
I guess I’m more of a gender bender. I like the mix of masculine and feminine. Kinda like Maxwell Q. Klinger did in Television Show M.A.S.H.
If I was a female I would be labeled a “Tomboy”. I love my beard, chest hair and everything thats makes me a male.
But having a girly side mixed in is awesome. Love womens jeans, skirts, leggings and painted nails.
So am I a crossdresser or something else
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If I wanted to physically transition, it would probably be necessary for me to self-fund. I don’t think I could make a case for it being a psychological necessity and that would be a major hurdle. I know there are people who have had affirmation surgeries in their 60’s and I believe also in their 70’s…
Looking through the comments there isn’t one comment what would the neighbours think? Most except the closet world which is fine! For far too long 42 years in fact I tried to manage my yearnings as a cross dresser in this fashion, enclosed in your own prison. But I can say hand on heart your prison his of your own making.
Once Jessica Scarlett got out of Pandora Box her yearnings became more prevalent indeed it’s now 24/7 everyday. Infact I feel more comfortable as if was ment to be so I have approached my GP to move forward with gender reassignment.
Since childhood I could not relate my body of a male to my mind of a female. I wanted female things and cross dressed from the age of 12. I loved the smell of nail varnish and the fresh colours of makeup. I looked at my sister and wondered why I was not her she drove me crazy. At the age of 54 I have moved forward to finally come the female I so wish to be. I know the odds are stacked against me but I now I will beat the odds and consider it a gift to be both male and female in one lifetime.
Love to all the girls reading this. Jessica Scarlett..
So many great replies.. for myself I remember being 5 years old and always loved wearing a nightgown to bed. I vividly remember the night I was told that I’m not allowed to wear a nightgown to bed anymore. I cried like a….5 year old? Lol
Around 7-8 I would always ask my older sister and her friends to practice makeup on me, as well as the clothes. I thoroughly enjoyed it and couldn’t wait till the weekend, when my sister had friends over and I felt so right… Eventually I was told that “boys aren’t supposed to do this, and you’re not allowed to anymore”
I couldn’t understand at the time, and lived the next 32+ years in confusion… Never understood why I was disgusted by having sex with females…. even got married lol..
Instead of a honeymoon she bought implants and I bought a Ford Ranger… Talk about a match made in heaven… It didn’t turn out well, but when she left I found a ton of clothes she left behind …
The second I looked at myself in the mirror I had never felt so….. (loss for words)
That was ’06, and as much as I tried to ignore or deny it. . It was my nightly “dirty secret” up until a couple months ago. I love being myself and trying to get there..
I wear panties all the time, and the boys are a really aggravating.. I can’t stand them, don’t want them, and they’re nothing but a constant annoyance. If I could ever afford it, they would be gone… but that’s all..
I realize that even the thought of penetration by me makes me feel nauseous, and I have a lot to think about. But have been in therapy for over a year now and it’s been great…
Life is beautiful, but when I realized it wasn’t my actual life, it’s a struggle. But I haven’t felt so comfortable in my own skin since…. .?🤔🤷
Jessica Ray…my dear, best wishes as you move forward in your journey to transition. I hope your transition is smooth and easy and that you experience positive vibes the entire way. I believe your transitioning will result in your finding and enjoying new friendships as well as enjoying peace, happiness and contentment when you finally become the woman you were meant to be. Anne
Thankyou so much for these words of encouragement. It is so nice to voice comments with understanding knowledgeable people.
I have a councillor arranged to discuss and help me through my transition and its Corona Virus which is my only obstical.
In the meantime my wardrobe expands has my waist contracts. I have never been as fit and ready to go as I am now.
Lots of Love! Jessica Scarlett.
The name’s Dresser………Cross Dresser.
I have friends with two passports, and EU one and a Canadian one. Same with my dressing.
I love the things and activities my male life affords.
I love the delicious sexual energy I have in female mode.
Vive la difference!
I’d consider doing a mild transitioning when/if I start living alone, far from my family.
That mild transitioning would involve spending some time at the gym working out hips and thighs, hair styling, makeup, and so on.
IMHO, HRT and gender change surgery seem too extreme, and the side effects are quite complicated to cope with. I think I wouldn’t be brave enough to follow this path.
xoxo
Daisy
Hi girls.
My stance on this has changed as I have become more mature.
In my 20’s I was primarily a cross dresser and reasonably happy with that. As time has passed I have slowly changed my position to what it is now – some 30 years later – when I am more aligned with wanting to transition and about to start hormones.
I particularly want my moobs to fill out – I would like full 38D’s – and to develop fuller hips and derriere so that I look a bit more womenish. I’m not sure about lower surgery though but only because of the thoughts of being under the knife. Then again, it would be great to wake up and have female bits down there.I
Take care girls.
Anne-Marie
You have as far I am concerned the Powers Method of transition hormone therapy in the USA. I am in the U.K. And lack accessibility to it here but he has had surprizing results from his patients. It might be worth a look at his Facebook page and lectures on YouTube. He has also managed to get improvements on those that have had been hormone therapy for some time.
I myself am on a 2 year waiting list to get to the gender clinic which in my mind is absolutely stupid when your own GP could put you on hormones from the onset.
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