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My situation is in a state of flux; but the only items I have ever purged are those I bought and which turned out to be unusable. My femme wardrobe is all fairly new, and fairly small (but growing). The closet is getting crowded, but that’s because I’m a packrat; I have loads of guy clothes which I haven’t worn for ten years or longer (some new), so as I need space,
my guy wardrobe is going into boxes for storage in the attic, under the bed…anywhere. I expect to be replacing worn-out clothing before I actually ever run out of space, but we shall see.The single problem is with shoes; they require lots of storage space, and the old-style hanging shoe caddies my wife and I both use are no longer being sold.
Hi Girls, i must admit, every so often i have a purge, not because i’m getting despondent but because of the ever increasing sheer volume of clothes. New styles, colours play a part too. They dont go to waste though, they go to a charity shop so at least someone is benefiting plus it helps the charity too. I dont purge much however, usually clothes i have had a long time or clothes i have bought where they were too big or small etc 🙂
Fiona-Ann xxx
Fiona,
Thank you for clarifying purging in your reply.
To me purging is negative and as you mentioned “getting despondent”. I have gone through despondency and “guilt” and purged at the time, my small wardrobe With counseling, I have accepted my feminine alter ego and express outwardly as a woman
when the opportunity presents itself…. Now I buy a dress, skirt, or tops and donate to charity the item being replaced…Leonara
Well I wouldn’t call it purging. I do remove items from time to time that we no longer wear for whatever reason, and I do seasonally re-organize the main wardrobe area for ease of use. Any items being retired go to local charity, alot of male items are thread bare, so tossed, few to be replaced.
There are certainly a few items from my beginnings that have sentimental value that I’ve kept.
I admit I have amassed clothing. I’ve had to send some to the charity shop recently : anything that either didn’t fit well, or didn’t suit me. My problem is resisting buying something that looks nice. I hated clothes shopping en homme but now I keep seeing things that whisper to me “I’m so pretty, take me home”. As I need clothing for everyday I do have a lot of fairly straightforward tops, skirts, jeans but there is something about some dresses that makes me happy. I got a new rainbow coloured frock today that will be ideal for next Summer, but I’m giving it a trial run tonight because it put a smile on my face.
I’ve only purged my collection of swimsuits 3 times….but never all of them. The first 2 times, I was in relationships during those times and was hoping they would be what breaks me out of the will to crossdress. Fortunately, I kept some because 1. I was unsure if I was actually going to stop and 2. I was unsure if those relationships were going to last forever. The 3rd time, it was because I had a few that I didn’t really like and I knew for sure I was never going to wear them again.
During my 66 years of crossdressing I have gone through many pair of pantys and bras and worn out or outgrown A ton of clothes, but have never purged due to guilt feelings or to hide them from anyone. When I no longer can use anything it goes to salvation army, but like several of us I keep some things that have A special place in my heart like the first bra my wife bought me back in 1963 or the blue baby doll my sister gave me in 1956 they no longer fit me but I can’t part with them, I still have A poodle skirt and petticoat from the 50’s. My dresser is packed and have A huge closet filled with lovely things, the few male things I have are in A stack on the closet shelf. I have A lot clothes that still fit but I don’t wear often that are stored in rubbermaid containers. some things like heavy sweaters and wool skirts are also put into containers until needed. Shoes and boots go on the shelves in the closet along with wigs gloves ect. My wife has her own closet for her things so there is no conflict between us as to storage space.
I haven’t purged (intentionally) in some 20 years.
From time to time I may either sell on eBay or just give away clothes I may know I wont wear anymore or just that are out of style/not my size anymore.
Gaby 💜
Like most of you, my female clothes greatly outnumber my male clothes. Being retired, I gave most of my male work clothes (slacks, shirts, ties, dress shoes) to charity. That made more room to allow my en femme attire to grow even larger. But that extra space was quickly used up. So now I occasionally purge my femme clothes (for reasons of style, size, or quality) and they go to charity so possibly some other CD can use them. My SO knows I am a CD so my clothes are not hidden. I’ve even offered that she can use any of my clothes if she’d like but she’s never taken me up on my offer (that I’m aware). Along with my three closets where clothes are hanging, I have three very large chests of drawers mostly occupied by female wear and accessories. Luckily I have a very large bedroom but it would be nice to get rid of one chest of drawers – so more purging of both male and female clothes will be necessary. I guess it is a nice problem to have. Hugs, Krista
Honestly, it makes me want to cry thinking about how many times I’ve purged in my lifetime. I wish I could go back in time, talk to my younger self and tell him to fully accept Stacey. I think life would have been a lot easier/happier…and I may still have some of the bloody gorgeous clothes I’ve had over the years…and all those lovely shoes…and don’t get me started on the knee length boots I used to have (brown suede which really hugged my calves and 3 inch square heels…divine!!!). Ok, I may not currently be able to fit into lots of what I used to have but in a few more months I will (I will be a size 10; I will be a size 10; I will be a size 10(UK).
Oh well, no point in crying over spilt milk!!! 🙂 I’m just thankful that I’m in Vietnam, am happy and healthy.
Things could be a lot worse! 🙂
Stacey xxx
My wife and I cane to an agreement about 10 years ago to dedicate one closet for my femme attire. I put a lock on the door to keep anyone out who shouldn’t be looking. My wife is happy because everything is in one place, not hidden all over the house. When I first started using the closet it was only about a quarter full. Now it is totally full and I have to purge a little, to make space, when I find new items. The closet is about 8 foot long with double doors. I put a shoe rack on the back of one door and a jewelry holder on the other. I built in some drawers in the middle for my delicates and have space up top for my wigs. If you look at my profile page part of the closet is shown as my backdrop for my picture.
I never get rid of shoes unless they are falling apart and really can’t be worn anymore. The same goes for bras, panties and pantyhose. Recently I’ve been going through my Patty clothes and found there is many dresses and tops I rarely if ever wear. They looked so cute on the rack or in a picture. But on me I don’t like how they look fit or feel. I like my dresses to be comfortable. Some I had just were of stiff or coarse fabrics. I had a few skater dresses that looked great in a photo. I had to have them and bought the dress in several different colors. Once I got them, I found them to be cheap looking and the fabric was coarse.
I also have some dresses that do not flatter me at all but I love wearing them. I enjoy wearing them in the house but I won’t wear them out. They are keepers.
So I put aside the clothes I was not wearing. I will donate them to someone. Maybe someone else can benefit.
Purge? That’s a petty strong word. That says getting rid of all or most of my girl things, I have “let go of a few items, but I’ve work long and hard to build my wardrode. Much of it is going into storage soon as I am moving and promised my SO I’d pack it away for now. But I refuse to just get rid of it.
Hi Fiona,
I love your polls.
I am not over run with cloths yet.
However I am to the point when I need to start evaluating cloths purchases.
I purchased a lot of cloths under the excitement of being able to buy feminine cloths and not really taking time to determine if it would really work out in public.
I must admit I like slutty cloths. LOL
So I will start going through things and reevaluating those purchases.
I am in the middle of move and that doesn’t help except I plan to build more closet space and maybe some more girly closet space.
Love Patty
I will never purge due to personal guilt or shame. I’ve accepted and embraced that I’m gender fluid and that wearing women’s clothes is part of me.
I hope I’ll never have to purge due to discovery from my immediate family. I’m in secret concerning them. If I am discovered and have to stop, I will donate what I can to my CD/TG support group.
I have a small to medium full wardrobe(half bought by me and other half free from my support group clothes swaps). Last clothes swap I donated a skirt that was a size too big and couldn’t be returned due to final clearance. I’m always shopping and adding to my wardrobe. I don’t go on large sprees(due to budget and to prevent my wardrobe from over-whelming me).
I keep my wardrobe in locked storage boxes in my garage loft. I also keep an inventory catalog, so I know exactly what I have.
I had a mad and slightly desperate purge of everything except one bag of items I couldn’t bear to be without when we moved house 6 years ago.
I’m trying to adopt more of a Marlene Dietrich attitude, but I regretted that for ages – I had some amazing items, but the thought of it all being discovered, and the potential awful outcome was too much.
Since my first talk with my SO, I have been keeping most of my garments in the drawers next to my bed – and am rapidly running out of space!
Yes, I amass clothing, almost unashamedly.
I still don’t like the somewhat guilty feeling I get when a package arrives on the wrong day. Worse when it’s more than one, and my wife hands them too me silently.
I need thicker skin!
I’m going to trim down my drawer contents by moving the summer stuff to bags for cupboard storage until next summer, and review them in the spring, and as summer goes on.
There are items that can go to charity shops.
But I will never purge again, as in simply throw clothes away – ridiculous waste of good clothing.
I amassed a nice little collection over the last week – two beautiful pairs of shoes, two skirts, 6 tops, a pair of trousers, 4 bras, 2 bags, a coat and 9 dresses – and an incredible silky jumpsuit – for around £150.
I should do a fashion show – they’re all lovely items that I have fallen in love with!
Finding drawer space has been a real challenge…
Love Laura
If I had the space I would probably would amass too much stuff. However I have a limited amount of space to store my ‘secret stash’ of clothes in, so it requires careful management.
I usually keep about 4 skirts, 10 tops, a cardigan and a dress (or two) plus a selection of bra/tights/panties. I have one handbag. I tend to cycle out clothes as the seasons change; so as we are going into Autumn I’ll be donating a few items to charity to make space for some new purchases. I like shopping, but have to keep what I buy to a minimum – so I try and focus on what I need 🙂
Shoes take up loads of space so I wear gender neutral flats, that way I can wear them in man mode too.
Coats use a lot of space, I have a selection of unisex style anoraks (lightweight up to parka).
Yes I am prone to buying too much femme attire, especially lingerie.
At home I have dresser drawers containing almost all of my collection of the above. Plus my breast forms. (As mentioned in this forum before my beloved and I sleep in separate rooms, so I do have some “latitude”.)
The rest, make up jewellery shoes wigs etc is stored in a storage unit about half an hour from home. All my dresses, tops, skirts etc are hung on a double rung “retail dress rack”.
I have the only key!!!
Memo to Laura Lovett. Surely “up” where you live service has self service parcel post lockers??
We have them “down here” and that’s how I have all my Caty stuff delivered.
Keeps “prying eyes” away from my purchases…. But then I get enough wine delivered to the house to keep those “eyes” happy.
Happy dressing everyone
Caty
Hi Cary,
Not in my immediate vicinity – I live out in the sticks.
I used to use click and collect services, but the places offering them have been stopping, seemingly on an ever-widening radius of where I live…. is it co-incidences?? /grin
As far as I’m concerned, it shouldn’t be a problem. I’m simply observing the uncomfortable situation, and will strive to improve it.
A few items of clothing do not deserve icy silence – I wouldn’t do that to anyone else, so I don’t deserve it.
Karma will sort it.
Que sera sera.
Love Laura
Years ago, when I was confused and guilty about the CD thing, I purged several times. That’s more than 30 years ago – maybe 35! When I came to grips with this proclivity, I have been at peace with who I am and have no need to get rid of the stuff. I believe that quality reading – even some of the early Virginia Prince stuff – helped me understand that I’m a pretty good person with an unusual hoppy. When the internet hit us full-bore, I knew that it was not as unusual as I’d thought.
Which brings us to today. I am overrun with women’s cloths, shoes, underwear, and foundation garments. When skinny-jeans and tights became the thing, I must have gone nuts. I have so many variation of jeans that I’m afraid to count. I’ve sorted them several times by color, rise, and leg opening. While I prefer really skinny, I frequently wear straight leg or flare, when I’m going out and want to take the focus off my feminine footwear. You can hide some nicely heeled sandals and booties under a gentle flare. Now, I may have only one pair of men’s jeans that I never wear. My Old Navy women’s jeans fool almost everyone.
But, I need to clean house. I’ve sold several hundreds of dollars of stuff on ebay and now Poshmark. But that takes time to stage, photo, upload, package and send. And . . . I don’t have the space for staging. I think I’m just going to have to bite-the-bullet and send some of it off to the thrift store. The problem is, when I start going through the storage containers, I find old item that I love and can’t part with. I’ve never thought of myself as a hoarder, but I certainly am in my feminine wardrobe!
I hang my clothes up in their own wardrobe…..my SO complains that I take up too much space with all my dresses, tops and skirts.
As for the bathroom……my makeup everywhere….lol
What a great poll! Thanks Fiona;
I really don’t like to use the word Purge, and when I’ve done that it’s close to everything.. Never Again!.
Now I occasionally “Prune” the collection, but it’s still mostly in a growth phase.
-Molly.
Hi Molly, in retrospect, the word ‘purge’ was a little too strong really. Yes!! prune is a more diplomatic way of putting it 🙂 . Sorry for using the word ‘purge’ , i consider myself told off lol.
Fiona-Ann xxx
Fiona;
Please don’t consider that a telling off.. It isn’t. I love your imagination with the Polls! I’ve just got too much negative association with the word purge… Some things just sound funnier spoken rather than written. 🙂 I’m trusting that it was also humour in your response.
Thanks for the thought provoking polls
-Molly
Cheers Molly 🙂 . Lol no offence taken! sometimes i type words without deeply looking into their meaning. I think the word ‘purge’ is generally disagreeable and not just crossdressing, i.e, purging a sink, purging with eating disorders etc etc. I really hoped that people would just collect clothes as i agree, its heart breaking to let them go. Its not too bad if you are swapping them for more clothes, like an upgrade, if you will, but yeah, the replies so far have been interesting! please keep them coming!! 🙂
Fiona-Ann xxx
Loved your response Molly, I’m exactly the same every now and again I pass on an a couple of items mainly to charity shops, however I do buy more that I shed so like you I also have a growing wardrobe. My biggest challenge now is where to hide it all as unfortunately Stephanie is still in hiding.
Stephanie x
I have one small closet in the back bedroom that I keep the few drab clothes in that I still have and a small dresser that was mine when I was a kid for some drab things.
All of the other closets have my true wardrobe. Now it sounds like I am a clothes horse, but I’m not really over run, yet. One closet has my summer things, another my winter clothes, and another my outdoor clothing for the in-between weather time. Dressy clothes have their own space too. The shoes for each season are kept with the clothes, and it’s just a matter of transferring them to my main closet at the right time of year.
The day I move them around is usually the day I decide which ones go to Goodwill or to the dumpster as they are worn our or have a tear or some kind of stain I just cannot get out. That’s why I picked that I purge occasionally, but it’s needed to make room for new things.
Paula
I voted “other” because I still have room for clothes — and I keep buying them! But I’m slowly going through my things and will donate those that I’m sure I won’t wear again. When I started seriously cross dressing I experimented with great bargains. I look back on that as a learning experience. I now have a better idea of what works. I spend a little more money but get higher quality. I hope everything I donate will make someone happy. I justify the expense by considering that I don’t play golf and I don’t own a boat. The preoccupation that means so much to me is cheaper than many of the usual alternatives.
Yes , definitely have to do some wardrobe management. I go through once in a while and find things and think, why did I by this anyway. Also a lot of my older collection is not my style or age appropriate anymore. Another factor is my wife complains I’m hogging the closet. We’re empty nesters now so I’ve moved a lot of my less worn articles into another closet, formal wear, winter stuff in the summer and visa versa. Wardrobe management is a must.
HaHaaa I can’t hardly believe I’m saying this; I use two closets. One is where I keep most of my garments such as seasonal or event specific. My daily closet is where I keep 6 pairs of shoes and 2 dresses. 4 sets of skirts and blouses. I purge often as I’ve only been Dressing for a year. I’ve found that I actually like many of the things I thought I would never even try and of course many things I thought would be the hot item ended up as a donation item. So as a Newbie, I had no idea where to start with in sizes. I had no idea how many names there are for each item. Say for example; skirt, bra, stockings or heels. I say skirt. I’m thinking a skirt is a skirt but …. Oh No my Friend! And it’s that way with each item in the Feminine World. I don’t imagine I’ have to purge as often as I did this first year now that I have a better idea of what I like and what’ll fit. I’ve some how managed to keep a surprising amount of the items I first started with. I do have a list of items I’ve purged that I regret having let go. I naïvely thought, “I can always get another if I change my mind” I have a small reserve of wigs and shoes to go along with the garments in my secondary closet. I purge often. I’m just starting my second year as a Dresser. It’s in my mind that now that I have a better idea of what I like and what styles and cuts fit my body type. I can invest in a high quality of items
I need to reduce. I’m over whelmed of what I have. In my younger years I throw out and start over. That was a big mess of money.
Today I went from a few pieces to way too much. I have become addicted to shopping and wearing
Maybe I should get addicted to selling some to gain some of my loss money.
But can’t help it Crossdressing is just so much fun for me.
I am going to have to say I have quite a mass of clothes (sorry for the pun).
If something is no longer wearable, I might get rid of things in ones or twos. But generally I keep what I buy. Only once did I have to do a semi-purge. But I have a lot of space to store things. So if I do have to make space it will be on a very selective basis.
🙂
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