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Living a high stress life I need to have outlets that I can let loose. I find that after a long weekend of fully dressing I am much more relaxed and calm. It’s kind like my meditation.
Do any of you use your dressing as a form of stress relief?
Cindy,
Not sure that i would say that i use it as a form of stress relief and there are times when even dressing is very stressful. However, as you say since i feel more at ease and natural dressed en femme i do find that i am much more relaxed and feel more myself when dressed and even for a bit afterwards having had some time to be my authentic self.
hugs,
suzette
Hello Cindy
I do agree with Suzette, I am definitely 100% more relaxed when dressed, but there again, when I’m out and about En femme, there are elements of stress in that too…so it’s a bit of a mix really. ( fighting for the last bargain on the sale rail with two other girls can be a smidge stressful… especially if you don’t get it..haha) ❤️ grace xx
I guess getting to see me complete externally provides some therapy , I’m feminine inside so adding the makeover gives me as close to full female as I can get.
It’s certainly relaxing & soul filling 🌹🌹😊😊
Yes, that’s a big part of my reasons for dressing.
The feeling of the last finishes to the look is so de-stressing that I feel joyful to step outside and get on with living, freed from my day to day worries – it’s like a holiday from myself, except that I am being myself, only in a more authentic, happy and relaxed way.
Small things become sources of wonder and enjoyment, nothing seems to be a problem with no solution – I dream up solutions to all kinds of things that seem minor road blocks in my male life, most of which seem to work.
One issue I do face from this is that prolonged periods in drab make me question whether I’m imagining this phenomena… My male side can get so negative without a regular dose of Laura!
Love Laura
I chose yes. When I put on makeup, a wig and clothes I feel like my true self. There is a feeling of being congruent and complete.
Besides dressing being therapy, my therapy resulted in dressing. The more I worked on myself, the result was Kay stepping out from the shadows. Kind of a two way street.
I agree with Suzette…I do not necessarily use it as stress relief, It is more like I’m incomplete and scattered when I’m not Mary Ann. She makes me whole and then the world makes sense when I am completely her. I just feel more in my element so therefore the stress of my living my life as my male self seems to melt away.
I hope that somehow make a little bit of sense.
Hugs, Mary Ann
Interesting question and one I’ve been thinking on recently. I am currently quite rundown and stressed and haven’t dressed in some time. In the past, a good dressing routine has helped me alleviate that. I answered “yes” but as another poster as Mary Ann says, I think its more a case of feeling whole. Not dressing, feeling slightly scared almost of re-engaging with the femme side, is part of the reason I’m not relaxed. So, it would be a therapy to dress, but not because it is therapy, but because I am lacking it in my life at the moment.
Definitely, I find it very relaxing to dress as it lets me express the real me. No ugly clothes, some pretty stuff and Heather just shines on through. I used to commute 45 minutes to work and used to love wearing a nice pair of heeled boots in the fall and winter, if I had a bad day put my boots on for the drive home and felt much better by the time I got home.
I have been working on my physical and mental health due to the time I have related to the pandemic. I had always wondered about this and finally acted out on my impulses. I honestly felt that how I have been conditioned by society that when I do something, I’d just be like I’m glad I tried it but it isn’t for me; I honestly kept thinking that I might feel a little bit sick about it or something. To my surprise, every time I try on something new I feel good about myself. I feel confident and sexy. I feel like it is doing wonders for me, I just feel like if I revealed what I am doing to others in my life that they wouldn’t be so understanding. So while I feel that what I am doing is therapeutic, I’m doing it privately.
I absolutely love being Patty. I dress everyday. When I’m all dressed and made up, I feel so good. I love how I look and feel. It seems to put off stress and worries I may be having. If I go out, now I’m totally distracted from those stress and worries and totally focused on my going out, with all the fear, excitement, thrills and rush that comes with it. Being Patty is like an escape. I become someone else.
Yes, it is a nice form of stress relief as it makes me happy. Makes me whole. On the other hand dressing is also stressful in and of itself. ‘what will the kids say? What will the neighbors think? Lions, and tigers, and bears, oh my!”
I will say that, for me at least, it is becoming less stressful as the wife becomes more accepting (yay!).
So more relief than stress these days.
Keep all these interesting views coming LOL XOXO
yes I use also as therapy. more mood relax and testosteron discipline control and decrease.
also There are other reasons to be a woman.
Caty has been a part of my life for 40 something years. In those early years she was “stress relief” from a broken marriage and this contiuued until the turn of this century.
A new and loving relationship came along about then and Caty had a few years sabbatical. But post that she came back with a vengance and now when she can be herself, fully made up, dressed and “out in the world”, its feeling of inner peace thats almost impossible to describe
Escept to say. “Hi Caty, how are you today?”. Response. “Just fine thanks” I am “me”.
Caty
i certainly do dress to ease stress, anxiety and when dressed it is so soothing and relaxing and so calming.
Like others have said, I don’t consciously dress to reduce my stress but I do feel a lot calmer while dressed and afterwards. My wife has also commented on this, occasionally saying “go and put a skirt on or something, you are so worked up right now”.
Is it the process of concentrating on ones self, a little bit of pampering and feeling better about ones self afterwards? Putting number one first for a little while? A nice distraction from whatever situation large or small?
Anyways, I just love it, and all you lovely ladies here on CDH 💘
PennyJ
That is a wonderful question. When I started crossdressing with any seriousness a year ago I felt a level of self love that I had never experienced before. In fact I received the love from myself that I had never received from anyone else. The loving caress of my soft hairless skin. The luxury of shaving my legs and the amazing feeling of actually feeling my skin against fabrics. The act of looking in the mirror and loving how I look. Feeling beautiful and complimented. I had never, sadly, experienced a love anywhere close to that from my parent’s, wives or anyone in my life. The simple act of experiencing the love of self was so foreign to me, any simple act of self love was a revaluation to me. Being able to embrace the feminine portions of my being have had an enormous impact on my self esteem and my creativity. Releasing the self doubt and genuinely, openly, embracing me in all its complexity is the most liberating form of therapy I can imagine. So I guess the question “Do I use dressing as therapy?” for me not just therapy or the act of therapy, but an actual reveling of the inside expression’s of the love I feel for myself, inside, becoming tangibly visible on the outside.
Hugs
Diane
All the time!! My work environment is with “neanderthal ” guys with woman who do not think I am too much of a man because of my short stature and build, my interest are not considered manly, my demeanor is not aggressive. I am trapped in a blue collar job for pay and benefits. As karley, I am that short sweet girl, the guys fuss over and be protective of………….eager to tell and teach me things…………….the girls see me as a little sister they want to be protective of …………and also want to tell and teach me things…………….
Dressing helps keep me balanced emotionally and psychologically by exploring past hurts and misunderstandings as the girl I think I should have been. I think my mom wanted me to be a girl but could not communicate that because of the other boys and her mental condition. So when dressed, I will explore and relive as a girl……………..karley
Great Anwsers
I,voted no because I am able to dress as Roberta almost everyday.Twenty years ago I would have said yes.Back then I was working in my old office.It wasn’t a high powered job I was a clerk at the lowest grade.But as I took a lot of pride in my work I would take any brickbats thrown at my team personally.This led me to book the next day off.Going instore to buy some new clothes and pantyhose/ tights and going home to try them on served as great therapy.
I definitely do. I work a high stress, fast paced job. It requires a lot of my time and energy both mental and social energy. At the end of the day I’m weighed down with decision fatigue and everything else.
I don’t dress fully at home due to SO, but I have developed a nightly routine. I kiss the wife, shower, and spend some time applying lotion before slipping into my panties for the night. The whole thing takes away the days stress.
When I do have time to fully dress Jocelyn has no stress. She’s carefree and enjoying sitting at home with a glass of wine and cuddling up with a good book or just chatting online with other girls.
My automatic response was yes and that is true, I do use CDing as a form of self therapy. However, I think that is the wrong way to look at it.
If I were in a sealed room, running out of oxygen, would taking a quick breath from an O2 tank be a form of therapy? Sure, it would make me feel better for a while, but that is because I need O2 to live. Just as I need O2, I need to express my feminine side. The reason I started to come out was that my mental health was spiraling in a dangerous way, my head was in some dark places. I have been out to my family for about a year. My mental health has been way better and my relationships with my family have been better.
D.
Oh my, yes. A sort of escapism. Honestly, sometimes I want so badly to share this side of me with someone but sometimes I find comfort in having a little secret all to myself. 😊
I need to get dressed some days. I might lose my mind without it!!
This is a good, thought provoking question.
One might say their stress is environmental – job, family life, etc. On the other hand, stress might be the result of gender dysphoria. The need to present as one’s true gender exists regardless of environmental stresses, or lack thereof. Either source of stress can trigger a desire to dress. But psychologically they are much different.
15 years ago I would have said I dress to relieve the stresses in my life. Escapism. Now I do it to align my appearance with how I feel. Presenting as a woman brings me closer to feeling “whole”.
Emily
That was easy to answer; until I started thinking about it. Though I like being dressed and am happy when I am, my main reason for dressing is because I’m not a nudist!! I think being dressed doesnt help so much with stress as it does make me look a little bit cuter while stressed… 😅. So I guess it helps a bit.
Scented bubble bath, glass of wine, and classical music. Now That helps stress!
Stevie
Interesting answer, Stevie!
I am a naturist – fully signed up to British Naturism, mainly because in the summer, when it gets really hot, I fail to see the point of clothing altogether – my brain cannot compute the logic of wearing clothing when it’s too hot to do so.
I didn’t have to come out to my wife on this one – I took her to my favourite naturist beach after we’d been seeing each other a short time, and let her choose with absolutely no pressure.
I had to hold her hand, walking from the dunes to the sea, but it only took her a short time to decide – and we’ve returned on numerous occasions at her request – it’s like being in heaven, sharing such a beautiful place with the s/o, fully as nature intended – maybe except for the sun cream…
It’s another great way to relax – there is something deeply life affirming about being completely free of clothes, just lying in the sun, swimming in the sea – or simply walking around.
It’s not better than being fully femme, but it’s on a par, in my experience!
The only problem is the meerkats…
😎
Love Laura
hello
When I stopped dressing in my late teens I never thought a moment that I might dress again… but just having lost my work in my mid thirties and at the time little chance to find a new job…”it” suddenly came over me after a “fancy dress” party where the husbands were dressed in their wifes clothes and the wifes in their husbands…that was the beginning again and dressing at that time “de-stressed” me completely as well as I enjoyed it very much! (and also gave me some “sexual” satisfaction)…now, many, many years later and being a “mature” woman, I continue dressing – now both for pleasure and de-stressing, so yes, I dress to destress as it gives me a wonderful feeling being “Helene”; going out and being accepted as a female!
For sure!
All day at work when the pressure is on and it’s all I can do to grab a quick bathroom break and a sip of water, the thought of what I’m going to wear when I get home (after washing off the stink and sweat and ‘male’) is the only thing keeping me from pulling out my hair and running screaming into the street!Thank you for the topic. Like many others I would say yes and no. Stress relief is definitely one my main reasons. I do notice that the more stressed I am the thicker my pink fog tends to be. That being said, dressing is definitely relaxing especially the process of bathing, shaving, filing down the foot callouses, etc. if I’m going to dress, it usually is a long relaxing process for me and try to savor it. On occasions, it can take all day just to get to the finale of putting on my outfit, lol. The other part of it for me is to experience the wonderment of the feminine process. Realistically it’s unlikely that your average GG goes to the lengths I do, at least all at once or on a regular basis. Probably only more so like if they are preparing for their wedding day or really special occasion perhaps. I guess that’s just my personality, sort of if I’m going to do it, I’m going to do it all the way and experience as much as possible.
After a bit of thought on this question, yes I do. I look forward to dressing. I can’t very often, so I like to plan when I can, like working from home last week. I had planned to do so the week before, and it didn’t work out, so I felt added stress. I had planned a nice evening outing with my wife for next month when my son was going to be camping with friends, but now he can’t go…covid. so now I don’t know when I’ll be able to have an evening out with my wife. That stresses me. I know I won’t be able to over the holidays, unless for a few minutes at a time in my room, that stresses me. And when I do dress, I feel all that stress melt away, and I feel good.
I like being in guy mode too, don’t get me wrong. And I don’t always underdress either. In guy mode I’m the guy I always was. But I need to dress some of the time. I think if I had the option to dress all the time, I still would not. Just when I want to, which would be a lot more often than I can right now.
Bridgette v
Absolutely. Know how hard it is getting yelled at over people’s money? It’s rough. I let me other side deal with it, and when I’m Annaleigh, I’m a care free woman.
Hi Cindy yes I find it very therapeutic I can just be Sarah, and forget everything else. When Sarah emerges from the closet a song comes to mind for many reason’s. Nothing Else Matters by the brilliant Metallica.
Best Wishes
Sarah xx
I crossdress because I have a woman inside me thats gradually taking over and I want it too. As im useless at being a male. When I was little I used to look at women with great envy all the beautiful clothes and shoes and all the freedom to be who I want to be is a major factor as ive always felt different
I answered “no.” I like feeling feminine and wearing panties and a bra do that for me. Weather had me locked indoors for a couple of days. I wore a bra and forms all day for a couple of days. It just seemed so natural for me to be enfemme once I’m used to having those clothes on. But, I not aware of feeling any release from stress.
I love reading all the different responses
Wow, Cindy
I did not expect the overwhelming ‘yes’ response to your poll. I, myself answered ‘no’ as I love the positive stress it gives me dressing en femme.
Thanks Polly xx
Stress is a big motivator to escape reality and while dressed your able to do that.
Hi Cindy,
After answering‘ no’, I though some more about it and would like to say, in addition, I love being Polly and my cross dressing has nothing to do with stress relief. I am Polly and my drab alter ego is less and less important. While I will not go the whole way to transitioning (except for real boobs) but… stress relief… I can do that in a hundred different ways!
Love to you all (y’all, in American) xxx Polly
I have been stressed for the last 50 years pretending to be male, and now I am out and dress as myself every day I feel so much less stressed. I have had a constant anxiety that I have lived with for so long that I didn’t realise until the last 6 months. Everyone else is stressed by the current environment, myself and my colleagues, friends and family are constantly checking in on each other for stress, but I have never felt better, I no longer feel broken inside. Everyone else looks worn down, and yes I do feel the stress, but it is not as bad when you don’t have that stress sitting on top of a base stress anxiety that you have lived with your whole life.
The escape from the stultifying burdens of responsibility in being masculine (i.e., kill the spider in the bathtub) and the resisting of the more distasteful elements of that gender (agressiveness, ‘being a man’)is a major motive for being feminine.
Araminta.
Great response
I have a very stressful job and life in general. This is absolutely a de-stressor. I always find my happy place in drag.
Holly👩💼
Me too. It has always been that way for me.
Any day before today I would have said no. My answer now is not really. Cryptic right. Here is why
Had a super crappy day Monday. One hit after another. Got home and there on the porch was a new nightie. Steel grey super soft. Like wearing a sheet from Purple. (Anyone with a purple bed knows the sheer joy those sheets bring) I showered my day off slipped on my jockey bralette with my forms and slinked into my new nightie.
Every thing just kinda melted away. I felt perfectly relaxed. So used as therapy. No. Provided therapy. Yes.
Trisha.
Been stressed all day. Got to come home get dolled up and relax. Yes I always use dressing as my stress reliever.
i voted no. i always think positive and have no time for stress. i have a job i like and i’m my own boss. i just dress to get away from a fairly normal day and be someone else for a change. when i’m dressed , i’m free to be what or who i want to be. have fun and enjoy everything and everyone around me. i have no stress either way. think positive and don’t worry. things will work out. male side does all the work and female side has all the fun. either way its a win.
All the time. Theres nothing like being able to get away and be someone else even if just for a few hours
It helps with stress. Feels kinda weird calling it a therapeutic technique/therapy. I work in mental health. We make everything clinical.
Ive heard jokes/using humour being used as a therapeutic technique. I refer to t.v or colouring as coping/distraction technique in my job. These are just two examples that come to mind. Not that they’re wrong in being those things it just different to phrase them in those clinical terms.
In short, cross dressing for me is a better stress relief when I don’t view it as therapy. On the flip side, seeing it as a therapy helps motivate me to dress when I’m not wanting to do it but need to. So, it’s complicated.
Fun question,
Sivvi
What a great escape Cross Dressing is. It allows us to be free without the stresses of my everyday life!!
Hi Cindy,
I think you forgot a button “other”. I do dress for a couple of reasons. One is yes to lower my stress, being Katey really brings me home and lowers the stress. Two, I feel I am really Katey with just a male outside covering me up. I feel so safe, proud, and comfortable being Katey. Thank you for your post, Hugs – Katey
A big yes from me, i always find that when I’m Dressed as Rozalyne my stress levels seem to disappear,
Before the lock down i was able to dress quite a lot but since we have been locked down I’ve not been able to let Rozalyne out of the closet so my stress levels are rising a little,
Hugs Rozalyne x
My days begin when I get out of bed wearing my silky nightie and having my morning coffee. I feel refreshed with no feelings of stress. I will stay dressed in my nightie for as long as possible and keep myself focused on feeling feminine so as not to start thinking about what I have to face that day living my male lifestyle.
If only I could get dressed in a pretty dress and spend the rest of the day enjoying femininity, I think I would live a stress free life.
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There are stressors at work and home. The feel of a bra or cami against the skin can bring a calming feeling.
yes I do really, but its more about the fact that my female side and male side are too different extremes due to borderline personality “disorder”. So Ashleigh is calm, peaceful, no ego etc and is so happy, much happier dressed than not and the stress relief comes from the fact that Ash keeps the dangers of my male side at bay and when Ash is dressed, she rules the roost…so yes, I do
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