- This topic has 10 replies, 11 voices, and was last updated 5 years ago by
.
- Posts
I am just curious if anyone had A family member that is A crossdresser? When I started crossdressing at 15 I was informed my father and my uncle were into crossdressing also. It was A family secret and I was sworn to secrecy and have lived my life keeping it to myself until both of them have passed on. I wonder if I am the only one that had family with more one crossdressing member in it. Or could it be that crossdressing runs in my family, maybe its hereditary?
Sarasue
Hi Sarasue, I have long believed that one factor involved in cross dressing could be hereditary. I think its quite feasible. We are born, with our mothers, fathers, grandparents etc genes and traits to some extent. An example being, say, your mother played the piano, its highly likely, you could be musically minded. My wife plays musical instruments, her mother was a pianist and our son also plays the piano….uncanny! no not really, just a gift passed down, like crossdressing!
Fiona xxx
Fiona,
ay, ay, ay! With the risk of upsetting a good percentaje of those who may read this…
if the grandma plays the piano and the mom plays the piano chances are I would be interested in playing the piano too. But not because a “piano gene”! More likely because it is likely that a) there was a piano available at the household and b) kids will learn by watching what adults in their family do!
And I’ll give you one hereditary reason too, to be fair. People in the family may be interested in playing music also because they may have inherited a good musical ear, or good hand coordination, etc.
Is it possible that there may be more than one CD/TG family member because of genetics? Of course it is! Because there may be families where the avg height is low for boys so girls clothes may fit better or maybe because whatever… but then again siblings had the same absent father figure or emasculating mother or role model Aunt or whatever other reason!
Phew… ok disclaimer Fi… I don’t own the truth ( I don’t even make monthly payments on it) and I may be totally wrong. And this answer is not personal to/against you. But I would really like to have people stop for a moment and realize that whatever made them pick up an interest in dressing up, that is really not relevant. Having a reason why you started shouldn’t be as important as to how you live your life from this moment and into the future. Having a “pink gene” reason doesn’t make a cd more or less responsible from their every day actions.
Ok, said my part. Exiting on the right side of the stage now.
Gaby 💜
I’ve pondered the genetic link myself. My youngest daughter has always insisted on wearing men’s clothes (including boxer shorts) and, last year, announced to me and her mother that she was FTM transgender. I’ll never forget that night; she broke down crying and I’m sitting there thinking “if they only knew what I’m wearing under my jeans”!!
Hugs,
Elise
Since many with a CD leaning are ‘in the closet’, and the LGBTIQ community is somewhere between 5-12% of the population on some figures I’v seen, then the answer is ‘almost certainly’.
Whether the percentage ‘bites’ in your case may depend on how big your family is, and if they are open about it.no one in my family ever x dressed. there is the question some one asked? why did my x dressing come from???? good question! i believe mine came from wearing tights for a school play i was hooked, from there i wanted to go further soon i was dressing up all the way from head to toe. now in my 50s i have my own collection of make up, perfume, ear rings, dresses, bras, panties, pads, heels, nylons,nail polish. wife knows and lets me dress up only when no one is home still have a 20 year old living at home. she also admitted i have more female cloths then she does, that’s true. who know i dress up? wife, daughter i think she knows but not sure, my niece maybe she does for i had her dress me up and do my make up for me for Halloween one year. other then that no one else, besides the people on flickr, u r not alone and cross dressing heaven.
This is something I’ve struggled with and thought about for many, many years. My father is gender dysphoric. He never openly dressed. He likely never even admitted it to anyone other than his therapist until I was probably out of the house. But I had clues. When I was a kid, I found a pair of high heels under my parent’s bed – I knew they would not fit my step-mother. I found an old-fashioned ‘cross your heart’ type bra once when I was very young, before he married my step-mother. Other little clues and hints. He finally came out when I was in my early 20s, to a select few, including myself. I said, ‘good for you. Live your life on your terms, and don’t let anyone make you feel bad about it.’ But that was all I could give him.
For many years, I blamed many of my personal problems – including my need to dress, my hidden femininity – on my father. I have never had a great relationship with him, mainly owing to the fact that the woman he married was so much the ‘wicked step-mother’ it was almost cliche, and he rarely stood up for me in the face of her oppressive, draconian treatment of me and her blatant favoritism for her two natural daughters. I was kicked out of the house (by her, with him standing meekly by) before I was finished with high school, and ended up living with friends. I do talk to him still – time and distance can go a long way towards making things hurt less, but I have zero desire to bond with him over much, let alone our commonalities dealing with gender issues – in fact that is the last thing I would ever discuss with him. I have never, nor will I likely ever tell him about my own needs and issues.
For many years, I blamed him for many of my problems (sometimes deservedly so), including the need to dress – that need I buried, hid, hated and suppressed. I wanted to be ‘normal’, and not feel like a freak. I didn’t want to be singled out, made fun of, picked on. I didn’t want to have marital problems with the woman I truly love more than anything else in the universe.
When my first daughter was born, my first thought upon hearing ‘its a girl!’ was thank fucking god. I literally cried with relief – I’m sure everyone thought they were tears of joy. I didn’t want a boy, because I was sure he would grow up ‘afflicted’. At least a girl can get away with wearing clothes of the opposite gender. Times are much different now. My daughter is lucky – when she came out as queer when she was in 5th grade, no one batted an eye – society is changing for the better for our children. If I had had the opportunities and acceptance that my daughter has, who knows how different my life would be right now.
It has taken me years of cycling through secretly dressing, hating myself, then purging to reach the point where I’m at now, but I still occasionally struggle with the depression, the guilt. I know my father does too. It probably sounds heartless or cruel, but, apart from acknowledging his coming out, and letting him know that I support his choices, I have no desire to broach the topic for any reason with my father.
My father MAY have been a CD…. As a child I do remember him prancing around the house in a bra, but nothing other than his male clothes else.. I had a step grandfather who, (tho it may have been just a childhood dream) whom I saw putting on what I thought was a red corset. 50/50 on that one, cos I can clearly remember the exact location in granma’s house where I was standing.
- The forum ‘General Chat “Life as it Goes On”’ is closed to new topics and replies.
Recent Comments