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    • #680692

      I am curious as to the support and or knowledge of our wives or significant others of us being on Crossdresser Heaven CDH. Does your spouse or significant other know you are on Crossdresser Heaven? Do they support you being here? Do they know? Do they know you have photographs on here? Do they know but restrict topics or photos? Is your SO on here too? Do they not know you are on here? Do they not care one way or the other? Do they think it is good, or bad for you?

    • #680787

      Yes she knows.  She encouraged me to join, she is super supportive and encourages me to be active.  She doesn’t have an account and I doubt she will join although she is a huge supporter of trans rights. She would be fine if I posted pictures, I don’t due to my overly conservative career.

      Susan.

      • #680841
        Davina
        Lady

        How wonderful to have a supportive wife! So happy for you.

    • #680818

      Yes, my wife knows and supports my position here.  She is not on this board but has her own boards that she interacts with.  My wife will make recommendations on my outfits, photos and accessories.  She is also a supporter of LGBTI and Woman’s Rights and we often talk about interactions in the community and on the various boards.  When I was getting ready for Diva Las Vegas, she would review my outfits and make suggestions like “do you have a simple silver bracelet to go with that, otherwise I’ll look to see what I have in my jewelry, I think the gold one is just too much” and “that jacket looks perfect with that dress, I wish that you had one in my size too” or nope, you just don’t have the hips for that” or worst of all and making a yucky face, “put it in the Goodwill bag”.  So, yes my wife knows what goes on here but please know that we’ve been on a journey with Intersex, ADHD and Asperger’s for many years.  It’s only been in the last 10 years that we both really got to a place of understanding, acceptance and balance.  It wasn’t always easy and it really did take a lot of effort from both of us to make it all work out.  As a result we both make an extra effort to pay it forward and contribute to the various communities whenever we can.  Thanks April for this very thought provoking question.         Marg

      • #680825

        Thanks for the thoughtful and honest response the comments and responses all help others and myself in one way or another to navigate our own paths and relationships. It is a journey with ups and downs, excitement, euphoria and isolation with winding paths. I appreciate being here and the thoughtful contributions of others. I also love my wife dearly and want happiness together.

        Thanks April

        • #680941

          Thank you April.  It is definitely a journey.  I’m wishing you and your wife the very best.

          Marg

      • #680840
        Davina
        Lady

        So happy for you!

        • #680939

          Thanks Davina, that’s so nice of you to say.   Marg

    • #680824

      Yes, my wife knows I dress but has no idea I wish I was a real girl. She doesn’t want to do, or know, anything about Paula. At home I can wear panties 24/7 but to dress further I have to get a room.
      I see several have supporting spouses….ones who encouraged them. But do, or would, they support your wanted to do girl stuff with a guy?
      xjoxo Paula

    • #680838
      Davina
      Lady

      No my wife is not aware that I am on CDH. No particular reason for not telling and I will do so at  an appropriate time. Unlike others whose SO support them fully, my wife is a work in progress. Initially shocked, said ok but grudgingly, knew I had bought clothes but said nothing, to seeing me in a bra, panties and nightgown, to now allowing me to wear a padded bra with inserts around and outside of the house full time. When we go out I wear a bra without inserts, but when in the car the inserts are in, including when we go drive through fast food places to get food.  Next up is to talk about wearing dresses and blouses/skirts at the house with her. Many of my CDH friends don’t have these issues, but I am trying to take it slow with my wife.  I believe my wife will be supportive of me being in CDH but would not be supportive of any public pictures being posted. I don’t pass as a female when dressed so I have to be careful, plus insuring my other loved ones don’t see pictures and recognize me. I apologize for the long response.

      • #680852

        Thanks Davina yes I understand that completely you have to be considerate and not force your way need to take it slow for sure. I understand the photos also. 😉

    • #680864
      Carolyn Kay
      Baroness - Annual

      My wife knows that  I dress, let’s me dress in her presence, goes shopping with me, but won’t let me leave the house. She has her rules, posting pics and sharing with others is definitely breaking those rules. She knows I do something, but it is a – don’t ask, don’t tell, sort of thing that works for us, sort of, lol.

      • #680909
        Leonara
        Ambassador

        Carolyn, as you know I envy you that to a point you can share your CD with your wife. I am a firm believer in “don’t ask don’t tell”. Thanks for sharing…Leonara

    • #680868

      Hi April no my wife doesn’t know I’m on CDH, she even doesn’t  know I’m a crossdresser I’m still in the closet, this is the biggest secret that I’ve kept from her, I’m not really sure that i will ever tell her after being married for such a long time X

      Hugs Rozalyn X 💋

    • #680906
      Caty Ryan
      Baroness

      No, she knows about Caty, but as I have often stated on this wonderful site, “She does not want to know”. We sleep in separate rooms, (lousy sleepers, both of us..). and once found a pair of breast forms in my room. So she hardly goes in there and most of my lingerie breast forms and some sleepwear are “hidden in plain sight” in my wardrobe and chest of drawers

      Caty

       

      • #680912
        Leonara
        Ambassador

        Caty, our CD experiences are the same when it comes to our wives..sleep in separate rooms, found my breastforms and continues to process my CD revelation. She refuses to open my walk-in closet where my dresses are co-mingled with my pants and jackets… and my built dresser is stuffed with panties, etc.etc. AFTER 50 years, I guess don’t ask don’t tell prevails… even as I am on CDH chat late at night… hugs, Leonara

    • #680931
      Robin Snow
      Duchess

      Hi April,

      I wasn’t really sure what to pick because the answers didn’t seem to apply to my situation.  So here is my best attempt at answering your questions.

      •  Does your spouse or significant other know you are on Crossdresser Heaven? 
        • She knows I participate in online forums regarding crossdressing

       

      • Do they support you being here?
        • She doesn’t seem to care as long as I am not talking to her about crossdressing

       

      • Do they know?
        • She knows I’m a crossdresser

       

      • Do they know you have photographs on here?
        • No, then again she never asks me anything when it comes to crossdressing

       

      • Do they know but restrict topics or photos?
        • see previous answer

       

      • Is your SO on here too?
        • She has absolutely no interest

       

      • Do they not know you are on here?
        • She doesn’t know about CDH but does know I am active on several CD Forums.  She really could care less which ones they are.

       

      • Do they not care one way or the other?
        • As long as I don’t talk to her she doesn’t care one way or another.

       

      • Do they think it is good, or bad for you?
        • She feels it good for me to have some kind of an outlet where I can talk to people about my “little hobby.”

      Hope this helps!

      Sorry … I can’t get the format right.

      Robin

      • This reply was modified 1 year ago by Robin Snow.
      • This reply was modified 1 year ago by Robin Snow.
      • This reply was modified 1 year ago by Robin Snow.
    • #680970

      The simple answer is to the best of my knowledge she doesn’t know I’m on here.

      When I first came out to her I went online looking for a support group and found this site.  I told her about it and she looked at it herself.  Her comment was that she was surprised by the pictures she saw.  We talked about it and she said part of our agreement was that I needed to keep my dressing in the house and she didn’t feel being here was keeping with that.  She didn’t say I couldn’t, so I joined to be able to get advice and talk to others.  I think it was one of the best things I did for myself along with therapy.  I have made many friends during my time here, received advice and as time has gone on and I have learned offered advice to others.  At one point my wife mentioned a support site her therapist mentioned to help her understand about crossdressing and suggested it may help me as well.  She went to it and learned a couple things but had no interest in participating.  I looked at it and decided I wasn’t interested as I was already here.  I did think of mentioning being here to her but decided not to as I was afraid she would see how long I’ve been here and it would create issues.

      So bottom line, she doesn’t know I’m here, she isn’t and due to our agreement I don’t have any photos and even if I did wouldn’t post them.  I have had a couple video chats with a couple ladies from here which was nice.  I am very happy that I am here and enjoy the time I spend in chat and sharing on the forums.  I have made some good friends and the advice I have received had helped me on my journey.

      As some of you may know I am usually only here in the early morning (Eastern US time) and occasionally at other times when I have the opportunity.

      Sorry for being so long winded.

      XOXO
      Suzanne

    • #680975

      My wife knows of my crossdressing and is supportive. She is well aware of my online activities – I make mention of some of the pertinent things I have read but it is not a major topic of conversation between us. She is also well aware of the photos here and elsewhere – she has helped me choose the ones to post!
      I am very fortunate – her acceptance and participation has allowed my persona to flourish. I’m still very much in the closet, but she is in there with me!

    • #681014

      My wife does not know or support me in my crossdressing. She would not be happy if she knew i was on this site. She has made it abundantly clear that crossdressing is NOT going to happen here at all. I have kept it on the down low and avoid talking about it with her. It is not what i want but accept what is and deal with it. Thank goodness for this site.

    • #681052
      Trish White
      Baroness

      Hi April, my wife and I have been married going on 48 years. I came out to her before we were married.
      For most of those years I had to hid my crossdressing. She is a very black and white person. She is tolerant but that’s about it. She has no desire to meet Trish.

      How ever in the past few years she has been mellowing out somewhat. She is aware I’m on CDH and supports me. She is even thinking about joining the SO’s group. She knows I post pictures and is fine with it. I also recently joined 2 CD social groups in Vancouver and am going for a tea and luncheon with my new girl friends in a couple of weeks. All with my wife’s blessing.
      I guess, in my case, taking it slow with her has finally started to pay off. I can even see her asking to meet Trish down the road. And if not, I will still count my blessings. For her she has come a long way and Trish is very happy.

      thanks for this post April,

      love,

      Trish ❤️

      • #681055

        That’s awesome so happy for you Trish slow and steady the tortoise and the hare. Steady is paying off enjoy your time out with the girls glad your wife is supportive to a good degree.
        Thanks April

    • #681245
      Amy Oxley
      Lady

      My wife knows I’m on CDH and doesn’t mind one bit. She has even read some of the topics and actually took my cover photo.

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