• Creator
    Topic
  • #432518
    Aoife
    Participant
    Registered On: October 11, 2018
    Topics: 65
    Replies: 321
    Has thanked: 823 times
    Been thanked: 1147 times

    So, the pink fog had been really bad for a while and I was really thinking about slowly building a collection and I started actually doing it yesterday.

    I looked around my nearby cheap clothes sources and while getting to know the selection, opted to pass. Later on though I saw some very opaque black tights on sale and just grabbed them. Not the most stylish or comfortable, I was aware, but after so many years in drab, anything that could cover that leg hair was ideal. Figured I would wait until I saw something I LOVED or had an unusual amount of time to myself.

    Well, this morning my wife remembered she had to go to the DMV. Thinking I’ve got the whole morning to myself!

    I go back to Burlington and quickly grab some panties and a very cheap skirt. I get home and change right away. The panties fit perfectly and feel amazing. The skirt is a little small and the stretchiness really shows why the cost was so low! Did some serious damage to the waistband immediately, but I still got it up and mostly closed. Pretty comfortable apart from the zipper drifting downwards. Put on the tights after that and I was feeling great apart from the masculine bulges.

    Figured I would be rocking that look for at least another hour when all of the sudden my wife bursts through the door. I’ve never heard of anyone successfully being in and out of the DMV that quickly! She could have seen it all through the window if she had been looking that way so it was a real heart attack! I managed to bolt out of there without her seeing anything and getting all the “wrong” clothes off and burying them back into my closet. I was naked from the waist down when I saw her again seconds later and managed to spin everything she saw in a way that actually left her feeling really great. This was all with CDH still up on my computer! Cannot believe I got away with all of that!

    Unfortunately, it was a pretty clear sign I need to slow down in terms of dressing (though I don’t think I’ll resist seeing things I love and are likely to fit in person). However, the panties (Fila boyshorts as I’m sure everyone will wonder) are *very* gender-neutral so I may be able to integrate them into my regular rotation. I will have to spend some time with them in front of a mirror when I’m alone before I determine that, but I definitely won’t be purging those.

    Either way, it was a time of highs and lows for sure. Felt so good to be en femme again, even if just in the lower half, but I think I really did get ahead of myself there.

Viewing 9 reply threads
  • Author
    Replies
    • #433648
      Wendy Me
      Lady
      Registered On: July 20, 2020
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 45
      Has thanked: 15 times
      Been thanked: 241 times

      I just wanted to add, When I told my wife to be that I had a secret I had to tell her, when I did I could see she was shocked and we talked a lot more. Finally she said she was actually glad because as I was hemming and hawing about telling her that I didn’t do something criminal. She asked if wanted to be a girl and I honestly told her no. She said okay she could live with that just keep it at home between us which all I was looking for. I only went out dressed for Halloween.
      And it was a nice feeling when the kids where small and asleep, I would say I’m going upstairs to change and she would say okay. Back then I had to hide my clothes not from her but from the kids, since they all have moved out my clothes are in my closet and dresser and she doesn’t mind, oh and one rule never wear her stuff without asking first.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #433157
      MelanieElizabeth
      Lady
      Registered On: January 9, 2021
      Topics: 5
      Replies: 47
      Has thanked: 103 times
      Been thanked: 256 times

      Pardon the pun but I feel like I’ve walked a mile in your shoes. I told my wife a couple years ago. She was not pleased but seemed relieved it wasn’t something worse. I feared she would either catch me or find some of her things damaged or out of place. I didn’t think that was right. We had been married for 10 years or so at the time. She recently found my things but didn’t say much about it. When she told me about her discovery my heart sank I was transformed into that kid who is being called to the principals office. It’s one thing to tell someone about dressing it’s another for them to actually see the clothes. It would be entirely another to present myself to her. Who knows how she would react. I stopped wearing her things and have my own. She knows about this part of me and while she doesn’t love it I know she loves me. I still only do it when no one is around which is very infrequently due to COVID. Whenever she knows I’m home alone she asks me “what did you do today?” I don’t specifically fess up but she knows what I’ve been up to. I’m definitely afraid of being caught because I don’t know how she would react but at the same time she already knows. So at this time I’m stuck in a similar spot.

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #433121
      Aoife
      Lady
      Registered On: October 11, 2018
      Topics: 65
      Replies: 321
      Has thanked: 823 times
      Been thanked: 1147 times

      The most frustrating part about being back in a skirt and tights again is realising how much it *is* just clothes. How can what cloth we use to cover our body carry so much weight to risk a marriage? It’s really insane. I worry that when I talked to my wife about this it was just so extreme. I was in an unusually intense place and honestly answered with a lot of “I don’t know”s. Maybe if I had just suggested the idea of wearing something I saw with her she would have seen it that way a bit more. I put on those panties, those tights, and that skirt and was bothered more by how I *can’t* wear them than how I *need* to wear them.

      • #433621
        MelanieElizabeth
        Lady
        Registered On: January 9, 2021
        Topics: 5
        Replies: 47
        Has thanked: 103 times
        Been thanked: 256 times

        I can’t agree more Aoife. I know it’s off topic but I have to respond to what you said. It’s sad that we worry more about why we can’t versus why we want to. Unfortunately as humans we can’t control what we love or who we love it’s really out of our control. Hiding urges and denying feelings will tear anyone apart. I agonized for years about telling my wife about myself, it wasn’t healthy. The moment I told her I regretted it but I know it was the right thing. The guilt and embarrassment was frightening. Fear of being caught and why we can’t dress  shouldn’t out weigh the exploration of why we love to dress.  I’m sure therapists would agree. I think if my wife knew how much of a struggle it has been she would be more tolerant. After all like you said it’s just clothing. I know things can change and I feel this journey is progressing but I know it’s not going  away. We are better people when we explore ourselves rather than hide from ourselves.

        2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #433086
      Caly James
      Lady
      Registered On: November 2, 2020
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 53
      Has thanked: 95 times
      Been thanked: 147 times

      Now that’s a close call and wit figured it would be a fast day at the DMV. What would her reaction have been if she saw?

      Caly

      1 user thanked author for this post.
      • #433117
        Aoife
        Lady
        Registered On: October 11, 2018
        Topics: 65
        Replies: 321
        Has thanked: 823 times
        Been thanked: 1147 times

        She would have been crushed by the secrecy. It’s really hard to ever talk about. She’s not in denial about anything but she always starts getting anxious about it going to the worst possible place. I always have hope that she will come to some kind of small step and bring it up, and a bit less hope that something may just adjust in her as it does with some women as hormones change (hoping for two more pregnancies.)

    • #433073
      Aoife
      Lady
      Registered On: October 11, 2018
      Topics: 65
      Replies: 321
      Has thanked: 823 times
      Been thanked: 1147 times

      Thank you everyone. My wife knows this side of me, but isn’t exactly accepting. Seeing something would be very bad. I will have to remove anything incriminating, which luckily is not much. Definitely needed to dip my toe in the water though and I’ll keep seeing what I can do to help her come to terms with this.

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #433040
      Julie Shaw
      Lady
      Registered On: September 3, 2015
      Topics: 5
      Replies: 30
      Has thanked: 133 times
      Been thanked: 128 times

      Tough Love Post —

      I have always felt that a relationship with secrets is doomed from the start.  I have always been up front with potentiat “significant other”s – it has always gone well.  I realize you can’t go back in time, but my advice (for what it’s worth) is to be up front as soon as possible.  The longer the truth is hidden, the harder it will be for her to accept it.

      I wish you all the best, Sweetie!

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #432709
      Emily Alt
      Duchess - Annual
      Registered On: August 24, 2019
      Topics: 11
      Replies: 490
      Has thanked: 394 times
      Been thanked: 2212 times

      Hi Aoife,

      This brings back memories except I got caught fully dressed by my ex. Things went badly and never really improved. We eventually split.

      I agree with the other girls that’ve posted. It’s way better for your wife to find out on YOUR terms. There’s a decent chance things will work out. You’ll be happier not carrying around a giant secret. Chances are you’ll be able to dress more often and see where things go.

      Coming out to my girlfriend and being myself is one of the smartest things I’ve ever done.

      Hugs, Emily

      5 users thanked author for this post.
      • #439383
        Candace Baci
        Lady
        Registered On: October 19, 2020
        Topics: 42
        Replies: 89
        Has thanked: 327 times
        Been thanked: 705 times

        Oh Emily I could only wish to have your brave courage to tell my wife! I am getting closer, but I am so terrified more so just of thought of telling as opposed to her reaction. Anyway you’re my heroine!

        Hugs and Kisses

        Candace

        2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #432700
      Robyn Devine
      Duchess
      Registered On: October 24, 2020
      Topics: 15
      Replies: 592
      Has thanked: 1879 times
      Been thanked: 2526 times

      Aoife

      WHEEEEW!!  YIKES!!

      Talk about skin of your teeth!  I was married for many years and its my opinion…her radar is already up and going.

      Just like Bettylou said, you might want to re-think having that talk.  For 2 reasons.

      1.  The sooner she knows, the less you hide from her.  Hopefully she takes it well.

      2. For your own sake. Why?  Because its clear so like many other Girls here can attest, your feminine side Aoife, is only getting stronger and its harder to keep in the closet.

      Trust me,  I don’t advocate dropping bombshells on a marriage, but its better to talk before being caught.  For everyone.  Sure its very scary…but so is living the rest of your life not being the TRUE you!

      XO Robyn 🤗❤️

    • #432578
      Wendy Me
      Lady
      Registered On: July 20, 2020
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 45
      Has thanked: 15 times
      Been thanked: 241 times

      There is the problem with many CD’ers, you hid it for years from your SO. How do think she will react when you land that bomb shell on her?. Some where along the line you will screw up, like leaving an item out or her finding your hidden clothes. In most cases not to well, I will not offer advise in your situation, but to others tell your SO ahead of time about your desires. If it is a meaningful relationship you can work out a compromise or end it because the feeling never really goes away and people will be hurt emotionally when it comes to the surface

    • #432520
      Bettylou Cox
      Duchess
      Registered On: May 26, 2019
      Topics: 18
      Replies: 1835
      Has thanked: 3390 times
      Been thanked: 6289 times

      Hi Aolfe,

      I haven’t seen you online recently; nice to have you back. I’m glad you were avoid the sudden outing, but your story does highlight the problems we girls have when we try to keep secrets from our spouses. Perhaps you should re-think about having The Talk?

      Hugs,
      Bettylou

      6 users thanked author for this post.
Viewing 9 reply threads
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Join our mailing list to receive the latest news and updates from Crossdresser Heaven.

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Log in with your credentials

or    

Forgot your details?

Create Account