• Creator
    Topic
  • #627532
    Tina Que
    Participant
    Registered On: April 14, 2021
    Topics: 54
    Replies: 281
    Has thanked: 1166 times
    Been thanked: 1700 times

    We all aspire to or actually dress en femme in differing degrees. Some of us solely identify as our male persona and some solely identify as our female persona.

    For those that identify as both, how do you reconcile the two personas in one being?

    The easy answer is that the persona we identify with depends on how we are dressed. How does this take into account underdressing? Deep down I am CD but my outward appearance must be male to keep my job or at least keep the water cooler talk from occurring.

    I want to identify as Tina more often, but am afraid to share my true self with others not knowing what the outcome will be.

    My sister is visiting from another province and I have almost told her several times in the past 24 hours but have always balked at the last second. I don’t know why I want to tell her other than being true to myself and who I am. I guess I want people to know the true me. I have always said I am the same person wherever I am. I cannot say that anymore. I am not being honest with others and more importantly I am not being honest with myself.

Viewing 18 reply threads
  • Author
    Replies
    • #631135
      Kelly Wood
      Lady
      Registered On: March 16, 2022
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 27
      Has thanked: 112 times
      Been thanked: 134 times

      this one made me think thank you for this post i have never went out in public dressed as a woman i no what im like as a male but as a woman ive never been out of my house i only have fantasies about it i should take a road trip and go out as kelly to see what she is realy like she is most likey a nervous wreck

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #630196
      Lauren Mugnaia
      Registered On: November 1, 2021
      Topics: 6
      Replies: 175
      Has thanked: 1687 times
      Been thanked: 890 times

      For me there is no longer any duality, as I have come out fully to almost everyone that matters that I am a transgender woman. At my age, after hiding myself since I was 4 years old, the sincere need to become who I truly am became more important than it has ever been before. I could no longer tolerate that hidden part of my life. On this March 31st it is International Transgender Day of Visibility and it is the day that I reveal my true self at work, everybody in the building where I work will know and I have their full support. In fact, I wasn’t aware of the significance of March 31st until a staff member who knows I am trans came and told me that I’d better be visible that day. They know who Lauren is and what she looks like already and have been waiting for me to truly come out and show up full time. So on TDOV 2022, March 31st, Lauren will debut. I am both excited and a bit scared all at the same time, but knowing I have so much care, support and encouragement from my co workers will make it an easy and wonderful day to debut!!

      3 users thanked author for this post.
      • #630200
        Tina Que
        Lady
        Registered On: April 14, 2021
        Topics: 54
        Replies: 281
        Has thanked: 1166 times
        Been thanked: 1700 times

        So far, I have told more female friends and family than male. I found females are more accepting. I did tell my very good male friend yesterday. He did not react very much at all and we did not have a conversation reagarding it.

        I would love to take the same step that you are taking. I will definitely be thinking about it on March 31. Maybe I will do something subtle yet visible. Maybe I will be ready March 31, 2023.

    • #628183
      Amanda Lavender
      Lady
      Registered On: April 6, 2020
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 15
      Has thanked: 180 times
      Been thanked: 65 times

      I like what you have said. I have enjoyed the comments as well. We all are indeed on similar paths in crossdressing. It does give me comfort to know that I am not alone in this. Young crossdressers are as bold as can be now. We older ones still have a bunch of stigma to deal with though. Cheer on sisters, We’ve come a long way!

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #628150
      Jill Quinn
      Lady
      Registered On: July 24, 2021
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 129
      Has thanked: 1092 times
      Been thanked: 579 times

      Hello Tina,

      I don’t know if this applies to you or if you’ll understand what I’m trying to say, but your post got me thinking about being honest with people and ourselves. From my point of view, my feminine side, my “Jill” side, is for me and me alone or those that I trust with this knowledge about me. Would others benefit from knowing that I’m a cross dresser, transvestite, or whatever label they feel the need to slap on me? Most wouldn’t. In some cases, it would certainly hurt some of my family and friends. Therefore, I don’t tell them.

      If such information is none of their business, and it isn’t, then not telling them isn’t being dishonest. The dishonesty would be to deny questions or accusations regarding my cross dressing. To say, “No, I don’t wear women’s clothing. I’m not one of THOSE guys.” would be dishonest. To go along with others when they ridicule guys like us, would be dishonest.

      This is intimate knowledge of us that most people never need to know. Think about it this way: Do you run up to everyone you know and meet and and tell them the size of your penis? Probably not. And why? Because that is intimate knowledge that they probably don’t want to know, and frankly, it’s none of their business. That is for you and a very small circle of people you trust. I would say that your cross dressing is the same way. YOUR business, YOUR intimate knowledge of yourself. None of theirs. We love to wear women’s clothing, for God’s sakes, (and don’t get me started on my love of wearing panties) we’re not out there committing crimes. We’re not harming anyone. Not telling others about our cross dressing isn’t being dishonest. It’s something special about ourselves that we share only with special people, until we’re ready to share, if we ever are, with everyone. I hope this helps you,

      Hugs, Jill

      • #630190
        Stephaniewy
        Lady
        Registered On: September 24, 2021
        Topics: 17
        Replies: 169
        Has thanked: 688 times
        Been thanked: 945 times

        Jill so well put and I couldnt agree more!!  At least for me.

        1 user thanked author for this post.
        • #631129
          Jill Quinn
          Lady
          Registered On: July 24, 2021
          Topics: 1
          Replies: 129
          Has thanked: 1092 times
          Been thanked: 579 times

          Thank you, Stephanie. I hope it helps some of us. Jill

      • #628211
        Tina Que
        Lady
        Registered On: April 14, 2021
        Topics: 54
        Replies: 281
        Has thanked: 1166 times
        Been thanked: 1700 times

        I feel reconciliation with my duality has hit a wall as I have told so few people, I don’t feel I can dress as I want when I want. That does not mean I want to dress en femme all the time but a lot of the people I know are unaware. I don’t want to keep it secret but have a difficult time revealing this part of me to anyone. If I like to dress both masculine and feminine, I should share with more people so I can choose without it being a big surprise. Eventhough I dress in private, I am very much closeted.

        1 user thanked author for this post.
        • #628728
          Jill Quinn
          Lady
          Registered On: July 24, 2021
          Topics: 1
          Replies: 129
          Has thanked: 1092 times
          Been thanked: 579 times

          Tina,

          I’m so sorry you’re going through this. All I can say is, maybe you could ask the people that know you CD, to go with you to tell others that you want to know about your CDing. Maybe they could give you that courage to tell others. I hope this helps.

          Hugs, Jill

          1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #628139
      Simone C
      Lady
      Registered On: January 23, 2019
      Topics: 9
      Replies: 182
      Has thanked: 73 times
      Been thanked: 742 times

      Re-posting an earlier comment which I hope helps, like many I think the alphabet soup is a bit confusing and silly in the end. We are who we are and respect each other for it.

      Hi Girls!<br style=”box-sizing: border-box;” />I’ve read a lot and thought a lot about this topic, and come to the conclusion that I (and many others when I read about) fit the category of “dual-role transvestite”. This is someone (of either gender) who dresses temporarily in the clothing of the opposite gender to experience what it is like to be or to take the role of the opposite gender. There is no desire for reassignment treatment, and it is not a fetish for clothing as such.
      <br style=”box-sizing: border-box;” />Actually it used to be more women doing this because male-dominated society didn’t allow intelligent women into certain places and roles, so they dressed and behaved as men to experience it without prejudices. There is plenty of literature of women dressing as men for that reason, and I am sure many of them shared our fears of how society, family and their SO would react if they had been found out. There were happily also notable cases of the SO or male friends supporting them, recognising the hypocrisy of society then, and science and literature are better for it. There were of course some for whom it was sexual, many though simply recognised they could not experience or achieve something without temporarily presenting as male. Of course, women have the advantage here that it is easier as a woman to pass as a rather small, fresh faced man than it is for a large, athletic male to pass as a demure, svelte woman. I also think society then and now is more forgiving of women presenting as men (no one reacts to women in jeans, try wearing a skirt as a man though!)
      <br style=”box-sizing: border-box;” />The real dilemma for me in the past was how to align this with the obvious thrill of wearing soft, sexy clothes. Surely that is a fetish? It was when I was talking though to a GG friend it fell into place. She said “I LOVE wearing something sexy, you think we buy all that lace and lingerie for men only? I get SUCH A BUZZ walking around knowing that underneath my plain business suit is a super hot set of lingerie. Wow! And at night that long slinky nightgown isn’t only for seduction, it feels good!”
      <br style=”box-sizing: border-box;” />That nailed it for me, for those of us who want to experience being a woman sometimes OF COURSE getting that buzz from sexy lingerie is part of the whole thing. And yes, that is what I want. How does it feel to be a GG, sometimes in loose weekend clothes, sometimes in more sexy dress. I am being a woman, not fantasising about lingerie as such. When I am Simone I take on a feminine persona as much as I can, to experience as much as I can what that means.
      <br style=”box-sizing: border-box;” />This has had some really great moments, being out and a woman admiring my dress. Yes, and I do say a woman, as she clearly saw me as a fellow woman at the time. It was an appreciative comment, woman to woman, which felt great.
      <br style=”box-sizing: border-box;” />I’ve also experienced the downside of aggressive men trying to come on to the woman I was at the time and not taking the “no!”. The anger and fear I felt as a woman at that moment was real. It was not a fear of being outed, so what if I were? In some ways fun to see the idiot’s reaction to finding he was trying to hit onto a MAN! No, it was the fear that as a woman I was both at a disadvantage culturally, and that somehow this idiot thought it was OK to leer at my boobs and make lewd suggestions.<br style=”box-sizing: border-box;” />Being in my two alternative genders lets me get a real understanding and respect for BOTH genders and the pluses and minuses of each.
      <br style=”box-sizing: border-box;” />I have no desire to change permanently (I quite like my alternative), just wish I could alter the body shape as easily as I slip into the mental state of Simone. Damn, and figure out how to get the make-up right!!<br style=”box-sizing: border-box;” />Best wishes to all of you across the spectrum, where you are is yours, I’ve found mine.<br style=”box-sizing: border-box;” />S
      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #628135
      Maggie Anderson
      Lady
      Registered On: March 9, 2022
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 2
      Has thanked: 15 times
      Been thanked: 35 times

      This topic is interesting and shows the diversity of humanity even among specific group I.E. Crossdressers. For my self I very rarely feel the need to be fem, I am male and I like to wear soft and pretty things when I can. If I was younger and have the information I do now I might feel different about it but when I started putting on girls cloths I did not even know the word crossdress or trans, the lexicon did not exist in my world and there was no internet.

      I work on cars for a living and have Blue Collar neighbors that I have a lot of interactions with so I keep it on the down low. I have very religious in-laws that for the peace of life I would not bring this out to them. I have told a few people and have had sleepless nights over it every time. I totally get the desire to have other people know and approve of who we are or even just be nonplused about it. I am hopeful for the youth and hope they can have an better time of it no mater what spectrum they fall on.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #628009
      Jin Crocker
      Lady
      Registered On: November 15, 2019
      Topics: 5
      Replies: 507
      Has thanked: 35 times
      Been thanked: 1622 times

      Hi Tina,
      Eastern philosophy beleives we all have dual parts, call them male/female, dominant/submissive, push/pull, ying/yang. As Gemini, that means I have FOUR different aspects of the single ME. So it is no surprise that several of us are girls, at least part-time.

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #627777
      Anonymous
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 0
      Has thanked: 0 times
      Been thanked: 0 times

      As I get older, I find it harder to hide the CD side of me. It just gets so tiring to hide it all the time. It is not that I need to share a secret with someone. It is more that I just want to be me, and be accepted as me. I would love to not have to choose between what I want to wear vs what people think i should wear. I admire and love all of you who are out and proud. Little by little you all are paving the way for people like me who dream of being as free and open as you leaders. Boooo stereotypes, boooo conformity, and BOOO the judgement from the small minded and miserable.
      Loves to all the beauty and colour you all bring to this world.
      Stay sparkly!
      Hugs

    • #627776
      Leah
      Baroness
      Registered On: June 13, 2018
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 343
      Has thanked: 6331 times
      Been thanked: 1434 times

      for me, my male side is protective of my feminine side from being found out. My counselor, thinks if I could go back and choose, I woudl come back as female.  Which I do agree to a point.  I love my male side, but also hate the “persona” of male attributes that society expects of males. I love getting dressed up with all the makeup, satin n lace.

      I think most of our struggles are acceptance from society, our families and SO.  Make no mistake, we can be our own worst enemy to our desires to dress up. it can play hell on our mind. At the end of the day, we have to not rely on others for our own validation and encouragement (which we all want, need and desire) but to truly be ok with who and what we are…both male and female which combined together make us who we are.

      • This reply was modified 3 months ago by Leah.
      • #627778
        Anonymous
        Topics: 0
        Replies: 0
        Has thanked: 0 times
        Been thanked: 0 times

        Very well put!!
        Loves!

    • #627749
      Cece X
      Lady
      Registered On: April 8, 2020
      Topics: 21
      Replies: 118
      Has thanked: 2455 times
      Been thanked: 756 times

      Thank you for introducing this interesting topic, Tina. It has given me something to ponder. For me, the duality is not in feeling sometimes male or sometimes femaile, because I always feel male no matter how much femmewear I have on. For me the duality is in the often-changing desire to dress male or female. On the one hand, life seems so much less complicated in a male t-shirt and shorts, but the desire to slip on panties and a bra never subsides for long. The duality for me is not in identity but in how the impulse to crossdress or underdress turns on and off in such puzzling and unpredictable moments.

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #627745
      Liara Wolfe
      Duchess
      Registered On: August 14, 2021
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 1539
      Has thanked: 2985 times
      Been thanked: 5246 times

      I am not sure that I do reconcile with my duality.

      Hugs, Liara

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #627585
      Mary Jane
      Lady
      Registered On: September 30, 2020
      Topics: 25
      Replies: 527
      Has thanked: 841 times
      Been thanked: 2654 times

      I mentioned elsewhere that I don’t like the ‘Being true to self,’ or ‘the authentic me,’ mantra.

      I mentioned that as a husband I’m being true to myself in being male. It’s being authentic within our relationship.

      When I’m around friends. Church. Fire brigade. And wild dog meetings, I’m being authentic to myself, and those relationships as fully male.

      When I’m around my brothers and sons. Once again I’m being authentic as a brother and dad.

      When I’m on my own. I’m happy to dress drab, or fem. In many ways I know my dressing enfemme is role play. Fantasy. Escapism. Comic relief. Or one of many other terms.

      I’m content in my duality. The question I always like to ask is “Why do you need to tell someone?”

      Is it for their benefit. Or your own needs to blurt it out?

    • #627564
      Emily Sis
      Lady
      Registered On: March 25, 2021
      Topics: 9
      Replies: 75
      Has thanked: 88 times
      Been thanked: 411 times

      It is difficult to say the least to be both. I am also conflicted due to my career and the family I have.

      I have told one friend of mine and now I often feel she doesn’t really want to talk to me anymore, but it’s easy to get in my head.

      Right now I am actually feel quite a bit let down and feeling like I need to pack up all my stuff and pretend to be just male again. Good luck.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
      • #627573
        Tina Que
        Lady
        Registered On: April 14, 2021
        Topics: 54
        Replies: 281
        Has thanked: 1166 times
        Been thanked: 1700 times

        I think understanding our duality means realizing that we are not part masculine and part feminine but are fully both.

        What others think of us does not change who we are. By telling others may change their opinion of who we are but does not change the essence of who we are. We can deny who we are but then we are not honest with ourselves.

        We should never feel obligated to share who we are with anyone, but should do it because we want to share a part of ourselves with those we care about.

        3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #627563
      Robyn Drake
      Managing Ambassador
      Registered On: March 19, 2019
      Topics: 55
      Replies: 730
      Has thanked: 1207 times
      Been thanked: 2215 times

      Hi Tina,

      Most times I don’t feel 100 percent female or 100 percent male. The way I handle that is just to be me. My goal is to be 100 percent me and allow myself to feel gender fluid without feeling like I should do this or should do that. There is some work involved in that. That work is to be geniune to myself and not buy into cultural stereotypes for either males or females when they don’t fit me. An example of how that works for me is that I enjoy wearing bralettes under blouses when I to feel like I have something sexy on and to show a little lace under a blouse. But I have (so far) not felt interested in using breast forms.

      – Robyn

      6 users thanked author for this post.
      • #627572
        Tina Que
        Lady
        Registered On: April 14, 2021
        Topics: 54
        Replies: 281
        Has thanked: 1166 times
        Been thanked: 1700 times

        I have been underdressing more as of late. In the past year, I have wore panties almost everyday. Recently, I have wore some of my en femme t-shirts and tanks instead of my male t-shirts under my work shirts. They are much softer and add an additional sense of dressing at work.

        I want to feel less guarded regarded my dressing and I think that may come with sharing who I am with who I care about.

        4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #627562
      Anonymous
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 0
      Has thanked: 0 times
      Been thanked: 0 times

      I can understand where you are coming from. But I have six sisters and 3 brothers. I’m sure one brother and one sister know but they never brought up the subject. Because of my X having a big mouth I think my daughter and two sons know. But they haven’t brought up the  subject. Point is I don’t care anymore. I am me   Unless you pay me , don’t tell me what to do. When I die every one will know because when they clean out.. my stuff they will see it. Live for today. Once you die , who cares

       

       

      5 users thanked author for this post.
      • #627570
        Tina Que
        Lady
        Registered On: April 14, 2021
        Topics: 54
        Replies: 281
        Has thanked: 1166 times
        Been thanked: 1700 times

        I am with you on not caring who knows to a point. I dress at home and don’t draw the curtains. I am positive my neighbors know and don’t seem to care. They also are not invested in me in any way. Even though there are multiple sides to me, I want to be genuine and honest with me.

        3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #627558
      Catherine Dickson
      Lady
      Registered On: January 22, 2020
      Topics: 36
      Replies: 270
      Has thanked: 332 times
      Been thanked: 1648 times

      Hi Tina,
      Your profile says your wife, son, and daughter all know. It seems like those would be the most important people in your life, so telling any other family and friends might be a comparatively small issue. If you have a good close relationship with your sister then I would encourage you to tell her. I see you’re also Christian. I’m glad to see that! If your sister is as well then it should go well, as long as she’s not a super conservative, hardline type Churchgoer. Your point about opening the floodgates is certainly true. It’s not something you can “unsay.” I suggest praying about it and trusting your instinct. Take a breath and trust her.

      Please let us know how it goes.

      Hugs,
      Catherine

      4 users thanked author for this post.
      • #627569
        Tina Que
        Lady
        Registered On: April 14, 2021
        Topics: 54
        Replies: 281
        Has thanked: 1166 times
        Been thanked: 1700 times

        My instinct is to turn tail and run from those conversations. I want to change that and be open with those that are deserved. Some will never understand and they will never know unless by accident.

        1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #627551
      Angela Booth
      Lady
      Registered On: August 1, 2020
      Topics: 9
      Replies: 1034
      Has thanked: 3946 times
      Been thanked: 4809 times

      The ultimate dilemma! Are you two or one? 

      You are your true self, however you appear. If you went from part time to full time the core of who you are won’t change. There are things that you will do to develop into the feminine role such as mannerisms and deportment by conditioning yourself to do this. Some will argue that they ‘feel’ more feminine or ‘think’ like a woman. What does a woman feel like and think like? Ask a woman and they will give you differing answers. You may have some womanly character such as empathy, a softer motherly nature and not have a strong masculine nature. 

      You say that deep down you are C.D. No, you are overtly C.D. and want to appear more and if circumstances allowed you would go for it. 

      I would have a serious go at telling your sister as you will never know otherwise. If you know her well enough and love each other should it be an issue to her? She may support you and you will be the same person to her no matter how you wish to dress. 

      I can say from my own experience that any one that knows me from old has said that I haven’t changed and still like me for who I am and appear more happier now. The fact I appear as a female is secondary to their opinions. 

       

       

      2 users thanked author for this post.
      • #627568
        Tina Que
        Lady
        Registered On: April 14, 2021
        Topics: 54
        Replies: 281
        Has thanked: 1166 times
        Been thanked: 1700 times

        There will always be a portion of my friends, acquaintances, and co-workers that will never know. The more people that know, the less I need to hide. Even though there will always be a duality to my CD, I want it to be more aligned and less parallel. In more situations, I want people to know me as Tina and my male persona. Hopefully they can understand both.

        2 users thanked author for this post.
        • #627807
          Angela Booth
          Lady
          Registered On: August 1, 2020
          Topics: 9
          Replies: 1034
          Has thanked: 3946 times
          Been thanked: 4809 times

          The two will become one to those that know you well. I hope you move forward to find out!

          1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #627549
      Kim Dahlenbergen
      Lady
      Registered On: November 18, 2019
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 121
      Has thanked: 78 times
      Been thanked: 375 times

      I hope you can find a way to discuss this with her. I know the stuggle of living two parallel lives. Its a logical means of self-preservation, but at the same time reinforces that internal sense that one is flawed. Even sharing with one trusted and hopefully supportive person can help ease that burden.

      2 users thanked author for this post.
      • #627565
        Tina Que
        Lady
        Registered On: April 14, 2021
        Topics: 54
        Replies: 281
        Has thanked: 1166 times
        Been thanked: 1700 times

        My window of opportunity has now closed for a face to face conversation. My next opportunity would include my brother which I don’t think I am ready for. I also have a better relationship with my sister than my brother.

        My sister and I have spoke about our family dynamic and disfunction. Openness could be something that enhances our relationship, hinder our relationship or change nothing.

        It will probably need to be in the form of an email now and maybe it is time to throw caution to the wind and go for it.

        1 user thanked author for this post.
        • #627574
          Kim Dahlenbergen
          Lady
          Registered On: November 18, 2019
          Topics: 1
          Replies: 121
          Has thanked: 78 times
          Been thanked: 375 times

          I would never advise throwing caution to the wind.   In my personal and professional experience, the bad decisions were those impulsive decisions.

          Continue to think long and hard, as you already have, think about the conversation and the direcitons it might take (positive and negative) and then of course, weigh out the plusses and minuses.  Its a very personal analysis, and of course, there are unknowables.  You can’t eliminate risk, but you can to some extent manage the risk.

          Good luck!

          1 user thanked author for this post.
          • #627575
            Tina Que
            Lady
            Registered On: April 14, 2021
            Topics: 54
            Replies: 281
            Has thanked: 1166 times
            Been thanked: 1700 times

            I guess I meant by saying throw caution to the wind was to continue questioning my motives but stop over-thinking everything. I can tend to talk myself out of having the conversation when it is okay to have it.

            1 user thanked author for this post.
          • #627783
            Kim Dahlenbergen
            Lady
            Registered On: November 18, 2019
            Topics: 1
            Replies: 121
            Has thanked: 78 times
            Been thanked: 375 times

            That makes sense.

            1 user thanked author for this post.
      • #627552
        Tina Que
        Lady
        Registered On: April 14, 2021
        Topics: 54
        Replies: 281
        Has thanked: 1166 times
        Been thanked: 1700 times

        There are a few people I would like to tell but always wonder what my motivation is and what am I hoping to achieve by doing so.

        If I open the flood gates of letting people know, I will probably not be able to close them. Eventually it would become public knowledge at some point.

        I guess I am hoping that by telling specific people, it will become freeing and not a colossal mistake.

        1 user thanked author for this post.
        • #627557
          Kim Dahlenbergen
          Lady
          Registered On: November 18, 2019
          Topics: 1
          Replies: 121
          Has thanked: 78 times
          Been thanked: 375 times

          I totally understand this.   I have selectively told friends and a very small number of family members.  Thus far, and this goes back over a decade, those who i confided in have kept the information to themselves.   Perhaps I have just been lucky, but really I think the truth is that most people that I shared this with just see it as something unique about me, and appreciate that I trusted them with the information.

           

          2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #627546
      Sofía Alejandra Hurtado Espinoza
      Lady
      Registered On: January 5, 2022
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 45
      Has thanked: 25 times
      Been thanked: 153 times

      Hi Tina, duality is the best word you could use for this topic, in fact it is the best word to describe us, I felt very identified with your situation because, a little while ago, I was in a position similar to yours, in fact I went to therapy with a psychologist, because the desire to be my feminine self was driving me crazy, with therapy I managed to find the point of balance, currently I take care of my image equally in both facets, I worry about keeping them as good as possible, because I am both I, 2 in 1, both represent the best of me,
      regarding telling your sister and that you are not being honest with her, let me tell you that I felt the same with my mother (RIP), I felt that she was I should have, what was I doing wrong by not telling him, in therapy I could see that it’s okay to have secrets, everyone has them, it’s your private life and no one is shouting their private life in the street, it’s not something you have to do for obligation, if you get to tell him, let it be really because you want to share this wonderful part of yourself with her, not because you are forced, because if you do something out of obligation and not out of conviction you are not being faithful to yourself,
      I think that the way to be honest with yourself is to accept yourself, with your duality, and continue to grow and develop in both, because that way you are completely you, it is fine if you feel more inclined towards your feminine part, in my case it is like that, but do not forget your masculine self because it is also part of you, hopefully that this can be of some use to you,
      Greetings and hugs, with love, Sofia

      5 users thanked author for this post.
      • #627550
        Tina Que
        Lady
        Registered On: April 14, 2021
        Topics: 54
        Replies: 281
        Has thanked: 1166 times
        Been thanked: 1700 times

        I would be telling my sister because I want her to know not out of a sense of obligation.

        When my SO outed me with my daughter, I had a sense of obligation to come clean with her.

        Thanks for your thoughtful response

        1 user thanked author for this post.
        • #627556
          Sofía Alejandra Hurtado Espinoza
          Lady
          Registered On: January 5, 2022
          Topics: 0
          Replies: 45
          Has thanked: 25 times
          Been thanked: 153 times

          You’re welcome and I hope you can find the best time and way to tell him and that her response will be positive, I think it would be great to have a sister supporting you,
          regards, Sofía 😘

          1 user thanked author for this post.
Viewing 18 reply threads
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Subscribe To Our Newsletter

Join our mailing list to receive the latest news and updates from Crossdresser Heaven.

You have Successfully Subscribed!

Log in with your credentials

or    

Forgot your details?

Create Account

If you don't see the captcha above please disable ad and tracking blockers and reload the page.