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I have been watching the images posted here, and I see a lot of different styles.
I see the images approved, and the ones that aren’t (don’t ever look there, trust me), and I have to ask what is the point?
I have met lots of friends from here, and the ones I’ve met are real people. they aren’t facades, they aren’t barbie dolls…
I don’t post an image here to show people a fancied up image of what I want to look like, I post me, with all of my warts, but if we meet up, guess what? you’ll recognize me.
what in the world is the purpose of making yourself out to be something you’re not?
don’t get me wrong, I suck at photography… most of my images are cropped to take something out of the image I don’t want shown, sometimes I change the lighting, regular image stuff, but I don’t put my images through an app to make me look like something I’m not. I don’t crop my face onto another image to make it look like I have curves I don’t.
I don’t understand why people do that, and post it as though it’s their real body, face, settings… okay, I have played with greenscreen stuff, but if you see an image of me in Vegas or at the Grand Canyon, guess what? I’m really there!I’m sorry if this seems like a rant, I’m just tired of fakes, and setting so high a bar that no one can attain it in reality…
this IS my reality, why are people trying to make it as fake as a film set?
Billie Jay,
Well…speaking as one who used an AI version of my male self from a pic taken when I was 20, I suspect there are a lot of reasons why people do different things with photos. I, for example, don’t want to post pics of my face. Period. But I think people want to SEE a face to feel like they’re interacting with a person, hence my profile pic. The rest of the pics I put on my public photos are all me — unaltered. Just not a face. I like the AI photo because it is a feminized view of my actual facial features when I was 20 and I like to imagine what “her” life would have been. But for security reasons or vanity reasons, or reasons of shyness/embarrassment, etc, I think people are free to project what they want the rest of us to see. And I also labeled that pic for what it is in the description if you go to the public photos on the profile, so I’m also not trying to fool anyone.
People come here for their own different reasons with different attitudes and sensibilities, and I think it makes sense to be charitable about those sensibilities and meet people where they are rather than making them conform to what we want them to be. As CDers, we of all people I think should be prepared to be charitable about such things, since I don’t think whether you post 100% authentically untouched unaltered photos is a moral issue or anything.
If someone is discussing something I think might actually be immoral or destructive to themselves or others, I might speak up, but this issue seems relatively harmless to me. That’s my 2 cents anyway. I could be wrong! Lol.
God bless,
Stephokay, then I don’t see the purpose of posting an image that has your face in it at all…
for at least the first year here, I didn’t post images of my face, until I was ready to go out and be with people…
Amanda was my real inspiration, and if you’re wondering if her images are fake, I can assure you, she’s as gorgeous in person as her most fab images…Well, as I said, I think people naturally gravitate toward faces. It’s an encouragement to interact. I think almost all of us would say, for example, that human interaction has been hampered by mask wearing this past year. I mean, does it REALLY matter if someone’s photo is touched up or altered?
Im not going to post a photo of my actual current face because I have a beard and I have security concerns. So it’s embarrassing to me and I’m trying to remain safe and keep my family safe. Those are my sensibilities.
Im not going out with people, nor will I be going out with people en femme, so this just seems like a complete non-issue to me. You’re in your place, other people are in their own (different) places, so all should be allowed to do only what they are comfortable with doing, imho.
yes, it matters.
we have new CDs wanting to achieve the perfection they see in real time, not in virtual time.
they shave, they practice with makeup.
they try to do the best they can.
and what are they trying to keep up with?
a person with a beard?I don’t give a crap who has a beard, but I do care if they try to pass themselves off as an angel using the image of a Russian supermodel…
That seems decidedly uncharitable and insensitive to me. Is this place only for people who are trying really hard (according to whose standards exactly?) to present a passable feminine appearance and all other considerations and situations are meaningless?
And once again, as I said before using myself for example, I am not trying to pass myself off as a Russian supermodel and very clearly state in the description of the profile photo that it is not real. There is no deception. Indeed, I have said multiple times in different threads that I am quite ugly.
I’m guessing most people here are smart and discerning enough to figure out for themselves which pics are authentic originals and which are not. If you can tell, I’m sure they can too.
I think it’s ironic that in a place that celebrates the illusion of presenting something we’re not that people would be upset about the fact that people are presenting an illusion of something they’re not…
Now I know why high school girls struggle so much…
CDs, all of them whether new or old, need support and love in here, not judgement – and inimical commentary provides neither. Egregiously so when it comes from someone in the authoritative position of site ambassador. I do acknowledge, and appreciate, that you clarified this as your opinion only and not site policy. And please know that I am also very appreciative of all the work that you and the other folks at CDH do to maintain a standard in here – I can only imagine some of the stuff that you all have to deal with, and I thank you for taking on that task!
I confess and acknowledge my bias and my motivation for a somewhat passionate response here. Stephanie Scott is one of my dearest friends on CDH and I feel that your replies to her have been unappreciatively dismissive, at best. She has clearly advocated for ‘truth in advertising’ when/if photos are not real, so what more do you want? If you’re suggesting a change to site policy to disallow any and all ‘altered’ imagery on CDH then by all means you have every right to pursue that change. If you are categorizing anyone who posts anything other than unaltered photos of themselves as “fakes,” I think that shows a profound lack of understanding and compassion (to those who are not in that small segment of nefarious deceivers) – are we not all in this TOGETHER?
In the meantime, so long as site policy remains as it is and posters are clear and honest about whether or not the images they are posting have been manipulated in any way and that the poster doesn’t try to represent a digitally manipulated image as something it is not, then we should welcome all of these expressions for what they are.
Stephanie Scott has been one of my greatest encouragers on CDH, and largely responsible for me gaining the confidence just last week to post the 100% real and unaltered in any way photos of myself in my profile (and to your point, yes I spend hours trying to do the best I can to transform myself, but I do it for me – I’m not trying to “keep up” with anybody). I’ve been in the closet for 15 years – it was her compassionately extended hand that has helped pull me out! Posting actual photos of her face is obviously not something that Stephanie’s situation will allow her to do (for the reasons discussed by both her and others in this thread), so she chooses to present an AI digitally manipulated image of her face, and ‘real’ ones of the rest of her, and so states that. We are both honest crossdressers, period. Can we not both sit at the same table with the rest of the girls in here, please?
Marcellette
P.S. If Ms. Scott really is a Russian supermodel, I expect an invitation to the next red carpet event 🙂
Marcellette You get the first tickets! I promise. Also, ironically, my wife and kids can all speak fluent Russian. MY Russian, on the other hand, consists of bits and pieces (I can speak Georgian a little better), so all my “fakery” as a Russian supermodel would get exposed as soon as I open my mouth!
So back to the topic at hand, and then I will say no more.
First, I gotta say what a rush it was as femme me to have someone come roaring in to defend me. Kinda hot! Lol. In these moments, I have these little epiphanies that maybe help me understand why I have this peculiar dual nature that I often don’t know what to do with. I certainly have head knowledge of a woman’s need/desire to have a man stand between her and a threat or discomfort, but stuff like this — when I immerse myself in my womanhood — brings that head knowledge to my heart, and it motivates me to look for things that might make my wife feel threatened such that I need to step in. I don’t think Marcellette would mind me praising her masculinity.
I think in today’s mantra of “a girl can do everything as well as a guy and some things better,” we sometimes inadvertently as men turn off our sensitivity meter to these things, believing the women in our lives can fend for themselves just fine. And maybe they can in most instances, but that’s not really the point, is it? I mean, I certainly can and did handle someone’s less than charitable remarks toward me, but seriously, when someone comes roaring in to my defense, I get to step back, catch my breath, check my motives, and rest in masculine protection. What a feeling. I haven’t felt that way probably since I was a kid and my dad was always there for me. It brings a special kind of comfort and stability. I’m so used to pushing myself out there to BE that champion, so it’s kinda nice to take a high heeled step back and let a man defend me! Lol. My hero!
I was really taken aback that the original poster doubled down on her highly questionable premise, especially even after I pointed out that I actually advertise in every way possible that my profile pic is an AI representation of an actual male pic taken of me when I was 20! It’s in the heading of the description of the pic, for crying out loud! There isn’t 1 iota of deception in that. And when I provided one of the reasons why (there are several) I don’t post a face picture (I have a beard), she then made an uncharitable comment about that. I’m gonna be totally honest here — that did hurt my feelings. She has no idea how badly I want to shave it all off and sit in front of the mirror practicing slathering makeup on my face so I can go out and hang out with other girls like me. She has no idea how much I hate having to touch my face or look at it in the mirror on the rare occasions that I get to dress. But, at this phase of my life, the beard needs to stay for various reasons and I’m not going out. I may never get to do any of that ever again. So of course I don’t want to post an actual face picture, but all the other pictures I posed are authentic, untouched, in terrible lighting, but all me — unvarnished. I guess only faces count for true authenticity though. Who knew?
And I keep coming back to this and will say it one final time. The breathtaking hypocrisy of a cross dresser criticizing another cross dresser for misrepresenting her authentic self is almost laughable. Everything we do when dressed is designed to make up out of whole cloth (literally and figuratively) a persona or projection of ourselves that is not physically authentic. We create the illusion of feminine physical features we don’t have and hide/mute our masculine features the best that we can in order to present to others and to ourselves a picture of how we feel inside. We refer to one another with feminine pronouns and call each other “sister” and “girlfriend.” Now, I of course have no problem with that. I enthusiastically participate in that illusion. And I’d LOVE to do everything I can to actually look like a Russian supermodel. But let’s not kid ourselves about reality and pass judgment on people who can’t/won’t do it all the way you think they should.
Now I’m done and will step behind my gallant defender should there be any more nonsense! 😂
Thank you for defending Stephanie, she certainly writes from her heart and I understand why she feels as she does. I do too! I don’t believe I’ll ever get invited to eat lunch with the popular girls. But maybe the bad girls, the loose girls, the easy girls, the sl**ty girls like me will someday have their own table here. Until then, I will, in as politically correct way as possible, continue to be open and honest here with my reasons for dressing as I can while staying within the parameters. There are many of us here that would just prefer to drop to their knees and serve their man, me being one of those girls! I’m not looking to discover myself…if in 65 years I have not figured it out, then why bother. This is the place where I come to find total acceptance, and a willingness to be helpful, encouraging and non-judgmental. And I look for help with technique, clothing, and ideas as to how to approach making Haley a bigger, more accepted part of my life. Guilt and condemnation only serve as vehicles that drive us deeper into the closet, the very place we seek to escape from, After years of suppressing my true sexual nature as a man, I’m not about to put Haley in that situation. This girl wants to love and be loved, to hold and be held, and to express herself physically and satisfy those burning desires that have had to live inside of me for years. Yep, I may be banished to the s**t table for life, but I know in my heart that there are many girls here that fantasize about doing what I actually do and yearn to join me at that table. There is room for that table here, and there is always room at that table for one more…I’ll just scoot over very close to the others! But be careful, Haley likes girls too😉
Haley😘
in my opinion, be who you want to be, be who you are. but don’t pass yourself off as someone else.
be real.
even when reality has warts.I mean, again, do you not see the utter irony here? Do you wear a padded bra/inserts/breast forms/hip and butt padding/wig for your photos? If so, what about those poor folks who come on here and wish they could achieve the figure that you have or grow the beautiful hair you have? Is your standard of authenticity applicable only to one aspect of presentation but not to others?
Ohh, BilleJay…
How right you are! In this age of ‘fake news’ I’d rather see people who they really are than some souped up photoshopped/faceapped version of what they think they should look like!
My photos may be a little ‘treated’ but for cropping and a tad blurring what you see is what you get. Every now and then I have a real look at what I look like and I cry out! How could someone this unwomanly be even thinking of crossdressing!?
But on the other hand, every now and then… I see someone I want to be! And… I’m proud to be me.I only post photos that portray me in my best… though my worst is not so bad nowadays!
Nobody, who would meet me on the street could say… faggot in a dress as I mean to continue with my transformation and my wife now considers my old drab self to be… dead! It makes me so happy…Polly 💋💋💋👰🏼♀️🌷🌸🌺🌹
Billiejay….
As ever, when this topic comes up…it always gets very very heated, as this one will…
All I will say is this….if you ever bump into me in the street….you will certainly know, ( and probably won’t forget…haha ) because everything you see on cdh…..is ME!!!!
Love to all, grace ❤️❤️
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If the idea is to be real then don’t wear a wig, breast forms or hip pads…we all do things to create an illusion. I’m not concerned if anyone uses Face App or any other filtering processes. I have many more things in my life to worry about other than that.
Sandy
I have used the face App to help with make up i admit but i have others that are just me. If the app changes my face to the pointbit isnt me i dont save i just delete it. I think us not perfect people like to see what we could look like with proper makeup. At least thats why ived dabbled it it.But I understand if it changes your appearance to the point of non recognition then you might as well put a total strangers face in
Well BillieJay you make a very good point, as along with some of the replies. If you present in the real world as your self then it seems odd that here you wish to have an illusion of the face you dream about. Yes we create our female illusion by pads and silicone breasts, but let’s not forget, by hormones or surgery we can achieve amazing feminine resemblance. Makeup too as with real GG’s can alter appearances dramatically. As with the real world we are all different and some are more cosmetically naturally blessed in the looks department, both in males and females. Anonymity and vanity play an huge part in these enhanced pictures, yes I agree they are annoying, but harmless in the sense that in reality we know that many are indeed illusions or Faceapp magic. What I find annoying is those that hide behind many disguises pretending to be different people, yet it so obvious who they actually are. And before you ask yes these are my own legs, and my friends on here know exactly how my face looks, and what I post on here to them is genuine, because I am crap at photography.
Thank you Jamie, your very kind. x
If you think Amanda’s legs are great, you should see all of her…oooeerr…better re- phrase that…I have seen her pic…she is lovely….
Grace x
Thank you Grace, your very sweet. All my friends in the FNC are gorgeous. No false identity and true honesty. Lv Amanda xx
As someone who has done some amateur photography (and as a closeted CD)I am conflicted on this one. Personally I hate filters and photoshop. To me the art is in trying to capture “the real image.” That being said my profile picture was cropped and the white balance adjusted. Where do you draw the line on image manipulation? For me, I want you ladies to have a sense of what “I” look like. However, I picked a picture that minimized my double chin! I am wearing a wig and makeup! I wish I could post more pictures so you ladies would have a better sense, but those would be “public” and what if people beyond this site recognized me? I certainly understand why members would want to use an avatar or manipulate an image to hide their identity. Besides, not everyone can get items like a wig and makeup past a SO, or have time to practice. Again, we all draw that line in slightly different places, ans as long as the intent is not to deceive for nefarious reasons, I am okay with that.
A loaded topic yet one that is real and of interest to me. As is normal with me I have little time to write a novel here but IMO-
I kind of agree with BillyJay
But! I have no issues with those that do this-their life, there thing and it’s not hurting me.
Those that say wearing a wig, makeup etc is not a real representation of “ones self” seems off to me. While correct this would be my male side, how I present as female whether here or when I go out is what I am in that persona and exactly how I look.
No photoshop for me other then to remove something in the background or cover another persons face of which I do not have permission to post.
I find some photoshop photos actually kind of creepy RE: heads on bodies or vice versa.
Sandy
Oh, lol,
Now I’m paranoid. That little photo that follows me around … ? It’s just my avatar, an image of Shiva. It’s not really me, honest. It’s not even a Faceapp of me 😉 My few photos are me
I do dither a little in my attitude to FaceApp. But BillieJay’s post did resonate with me. If you’re not ready to or able to present your face, there’s other ways – you don’t have to go down the Faceapp route.
Marti xxx
Girls, relax a little. !!! I think we are all living in our own illusion. Its ok to let each one enjoy this site to their limits. One girls carrots might be another’s broccoli. Its OK, to let everyone here be the girl that they can be. It doesnt hurt anyone. That why the planet is so big, it gives everyone room to be who they are.
I like the effects – the looks to work for that enhance my experience as a work in progress.
God forbid the day should ever come that I just think “That’s enough, no more improvements for me!”.
But, if anyone is that interested in what I really look like, I have a gallery with real pictures in, as well as one clearly labelled FaceApped picture.
That’s what I want to look like. It’s a great representation of how I feel en femme, even if it’s not what I look like (yet).
You got to have a dream – if you don’t have a dream, how you gonna make a dream come true?
My profile picture is an avatar. That’s all.
I have fun with it and change it quite frequently, as I like to try different looks.
It’s great to try them via an app first, then have a go at recreating them.
Nothing fake about it, except a few enhancements… and that’s exactly what makeup does.
Come to think of it, what about forms, hip enhancers, wigs – those are all fakery, trying to present an image that we do not have.
End fakery now!
Throw away all your clothes as they hide who you really are. Let your hair and nails grow, don’t paint your house or fence.
Great works of art like The Last Supper – fake!
The artist wasn’t there, he made it all up.
Venus di Milo, David, all representations of Christ…
Stop right there.
None of this is fake, in my actual opinion – it’s art.
And there’s plenty of room for art, no matter how it is created.
…and this has to be one of my favourite rants – I dearly hope I haven’t upset anyone, I just wanted to explore the very depths – and heights!
Love Laura
Hi
The few pictures I have posted I try to make as honest as possible and still create a nice picture. I do crop them and I have changed the lighting in a couple. Probably my biggest change was to use Photoshop to remove some bruises in a picture of my bare legs. I think i mentioned that in the comments section of the photo, it was so simple todo and they already looked shockingly pale without having bruises as-well.. Perhaps people should just be honest in the comment if they have manipulated the photo.
Jennifer
I have posted some FaceApp photos but I always try to note it. This app is fun and very addictive because it provides such instant gratification. I refer to it as the digital equivalent of heroin for us cross dressers.
I think overall its use here at CDH is relatively harmless and/or as others note, a matter of necessity for those who want to protect their identity. Perhaps the guidelines on the page where photos are posted can be modified to include the suggestion that girls should note when images have been digitally altered, based on their own judgement. I add that qualifier because I don’t think removing the odd blemish or under-eye circles needs to be a big deal (guilty as charged, your honor).
But digital alterations made with FaceApp and other AI software can be quite extensive and therefore a disclaimer may be warranted. I say provide some guidance and leave it to the individual to decide on how transparent they’d like to be. Let’s remember that this site is not intended to be a competitive beauty contest. Posting digitally manipulated photos without notification might be somewhat disingenuous but I wouldn’t view it as cheating.
Final suggestion: how about adding a photo category called “Digital Fantasy” (or something like that) to the drop down menu that appears on the upload page. This would allow each digitally-enhanced photo to be automatically tagged with a “disclaimer” that the poster would otherwise add to the image caption/comment sections. Of course, this relies on being honest but I think most of us here are. Otherwise, liars always gonna lie, etc.
While I wish everybody was able to share real photographs of themselves, I understand all the reasons why people will instead use drawing, a celebrity/deity/etc, or a m2f morphed photograph of themselves.
Privacy, fantasy, trying to get to that, etc.The main issue, to me, is not so much that the photo is not a “natural” pic of ourselves and how we have been able, to a degree or another, being able to enhance our look and present a feminine look, if that is what we want.
The problem is when people will use those types of “fantasy pics” and say “yeah, that’s me! That is just how I look when I roll out from bed in the mornings!” And even worse, they seem to start believing it themselves! And then most of the people in the site are fooled and start believing those outrageous stories they come up with!
So, the newbie in the site will be presented with stories detailing how “oh yes, I go out and even get dates and people ask me to model for them, yada, yada, yada…” It happens! Everyday! And people has been kicked out from CDH for that behavior. We may be fooled for a while too, we are only human. But we will catch-up, believe me.
Do you see how there is a huge difference between using any type of avatar, and trying to cheat people into believing that person in the pic is really them?
Gabriela
One of the things I really like about CDH is the “to each their own atmosphere.”
Posting a pic of any type or responding to a forum question could be a moon walk to the originator. Responding with a why would you do that seems not in keeping with the uplifting sisterhood here.
If you don’t like what someone else posts just flick on past!!
Caroline
When we post photos here, I think it’s safe to say that almost all of us enjoy getting “likes” and positive comments. For many of us, this is the only place where our photos are shared with others, and therefore the only place where we get feedback and, hopefully, affirmation of our cross dressing skills as they progress over time.
CDH is first and foremost a support community, but as faulty humans with an inherent need for acceptance and affirmation, it’s inevitable that feelings of jealousy and resentment may arise based on how many likes or comments an individual may receive. Such feelings may be magnified by the fact that we’re men dressing as women, and very broadly speaking, men are wired/raised to be competitive, especially with each other (disclaimer: this is a broad statement and I recognize that female empowerment is slowly changing this paradigm).
Therefore, I wonder if concern about using FaceApp and the like might to some degree be arising from our competitive natures, such that digitally-altered images that garner more likes represent an unacceptable form of cheating in the little beauty “contests” of our photo pages.
I could well be off base here, but just sayin’….
To be honest, I’m a bit disappointed – and maybe even a little envious – that the FaceApped picture in my public photos has got significantly more likes and comments than either of the 2 “genuine” pictures.
Nevertheless, the FaceApped picture captures the essence of how I feel, what I believe I look like, and inspires me far better than the other pictures.
From this data, the clear takeaway is that statistically, CDs much prefer to see enhanced images of other CDs than untouched ones.
Love Laura
The 3 pictures I’ve posted so far are all me and untouched. But thats my choice. I should say that each one was selected from about 10-15 similar ones i took in the same ‘photo shoot’ . I only look for things like lighting, pose and hoprfully a passable smile (which im hardly ever happy with). I really have seldom cared for any photos of me ever except some a semi professional photographer friend once took of me when i was 19. Just a head shot but it must have looked decent as i had 5 or 6 wallet size copies made and tbey were all taken quickly by young woman college classmates , none who i ever dated.
That said , i have little to no problem if others want to do things to their photos…if they mention what was done, even briefly. I think it is hard for a lot of us to feel really good about many of our self photos. i know a lot of truly professional photos like those H.S. or college graduation ones get touched up a little and its hardly talked about.
So post something you feel good about, just be forthright about its representation. I’ll understand and appreciate it for what it is and hopefully for what the poster would like it to be.
There’s a lot of opinion down the thread here. This place is greatest when it’s in “inclusive mode”. If you don’t want to use an app, don’t. If you do use an app, great. I don’t use any apps in my pics to change anything. What you see is me, enhanced by probably too much time and too little skill at the makeup table, my forms, shapewear, wig, and the hope that I look as good as I feel at that particular moment. And after discarding dozens of pics I didn’t like. But again, if you like using whatever app to improve the image, or as inspiration, or whatever… go for it. It’s no fiber out of my wig either way…
Bridgette (who looks exactly like her picture… except for the fact that in reality she’s a rather average, overweight, balding middle aged dude that looks nothing like that…lol!
I would much prefer to see a “real” photo of the person whose post I’m reading, or with whom I’m conversing; it “fixes” them in my brain better and helps me keep track of them in future discourses. And a few of the ladies here are truly beautiful and worthy of admiration. I find avatars and “headless” photos mildly disappointing, but I do have to respect others’ right to privacy…there’s so little of it remaining, nowadays.
Bettylou
Changed my avatar just for you @bunnymom ! Not brave enough to put my entire image out there yet, so only a partial peek. You may now be 1/3 less disappointed.
Best, Clara
(full disclosure: not my real name)
Why, thank you, Clara; I’m flattered. And may I say the part of you which does show looks very nice. And since I read your bio, I knew it wasn’t your “real” name (I love puns).
Hugs,
Bettylou
Good topic, Billiejay. I’ve enjoyed reading everyones thoughtful responses.
My take is that I think everyone should post what they feel comfortable posting, but I agree that the face app pics are in the same ballpark as cutting and pasting someone else’s head on your own. At least that’s what it’s felt like to me when I’ve done it. Maybe others have had better experiences with it. That said, if using face app creates an image that feels like an expression of the person you are inside, then that’s great. I’m all for that.
Personally, I have been an amateur photographer since junior high school and I’ve always loved fashion photography in particular. Don’t think for a second that those models aren’t air brushed and Photoshopped to the ninth degree. Google Madonna/Marc Jacobs/Louis Vuitton/Photoshop and you’ll see some amazing pre and post images of the Material Girl herself. When I’ve done at-home photo sessions, I’ve strived to get the best original image to work with by using as much natural light as possible and by using a good DSLR with a high quality lens. The resolution on those pictures is very high and incredibly unforgiving, so I will smooth out my wrinkles and flaws in Photoshop. What I don’t do is change the structure of my face by making my eyes bigger, raising my cheek bones or slimming my jawline. In essence, I try not to change what I naturally look like.
When I shoot photos on my iPhone I never touch them up, because the resolution is low enough that they don’t highlight every single tiny detail on your face. It’s much more forgiving. I like that it’s not touched up, but I also like creating fashion portraits. For me, it’s different horses for different courses.
Good points Marie. I’d like to note that the iPhone 12 takes very high resolution images as well. I upgraded from my old iPhone 6 to the 12 and also purchased a couple of professional soft lights – the goal being to up my game in terms of my home photo shoots. I typically use the “portrait” mode on the 12. Well, it upped my game alright in something of an unintended way. With higher resolution comes the ability to see every nook and cranny, uneven eyeliner and lipstick lines, etc. So I do find the need to do some “light” touching up.
Just like the gender spectrum, there’s a wide range in the degree to which images can be digitally altered, and an equally wide range of people’s views on where the line might fall between what they consider acceptable or not.
Hello girls, how are you? I hope so and here is my opinion, because unlike the others, I do not agree with your post, in fact I think it may even disrespect the freedom that all of us here have to show ourselves as we want, I specifically do not have on this site a photo with faceapp, but in one of my social networks I show myself with these helps, and you asked the reasons, because I am going to list them for you so that you understand my point of view and perhaps that of many of us too, 1. the Realities are different for each one, that means that although many here can dress and make up and photograph themselves to their liking, not all of us have those advantages, some of us simply cannot do it with total freedom, nor can we buy wigs or many dresses or even to be able to use them as frequently as we would like and less to be able to take photos and put on makeup, for some of us the only way to express our feminine identity is through these technological aids, which, They do not necessarily make us be false people, the reality dear is that your reality is not the same as mine, maybe you have that freedom to do it but I on the contrary must wait in the applications to be able to live my feminine identity without risk of hurting my beloved ones.
2. in second place for many of us, love is first than our own pleasure and personal right as people, because we live with loved ones who would get hurt if they see us walking in a dress and much more if we put on makeup, not my dear, for me it is first love and then my pleasure.
3. thirdly, for many of us, not even all the makeup could soften the features of our body and face, as masculine as they are, that not even our feminine identity feels reflected in our real photos, according to you, that’s why many of we take photos with technological aids such as faceapp and other aids, because our feminine identity tells us that this is the way we want to see each other, because even if I put all my makeup on, it would not be more than a man with bad makeup because Nor have I been able to learn makeup, because I cannot practice it as surely you can, the realities of many are very different and for that reason alone, we cannot enter to judge and determine that a person who uses an app is a false person or a liar when what you want is to see yourself as your spirit really wants to look, and you feel that you should look, it is the psychological effect, more than anything, not to fool anyone but to be who we cannot be in real life.
The idea of a ‘real image’ and where to draw the line on manipulation is an elusive one, and it just gets blurrier with each advance in technology. Today we have images that look publishable with no editing mostly because the autosettings on the camera, or AI in the phone, is doing the photoshopping or adjusting for difficult conditions right there in the fraction of a second after we push the button. In phones especially, the last couple of generations, it has nothing to do with the basic technology of photography, but rather *software* that is capturing and rendering multiple exposures into a single optimized composite image. So, the single frame output that we take for granted as a ‘real image’ is in fact one that never actually came through the lens and could not exist without manipulation not just of one image, but of several! Thus was it industry news when the ‘brains’ behind the AI processor for the pixel line, which are widely known to have superior cameras based on AI processing, left google last year to go to adobe. Apple does the same thing differently of course.
Compared to this, me working for an hour using only my human artistic sense to make adjustments using slide bars, all seems rather quaint. The ‘real image’ isnt whatever the camera says it is, it is the one that gives me the feeling back from that moment. Once in a blue moon they are one in the same, and I celebrate that when it happens, but normally there are at least a dozen or so (yes, that many) settings related to light, color quality, and optic distortion correction that I at least poke at before publishing. What matters from a ‘manipulation’ standpoint is that I can’t work with light I didnt capture through the lens all at the same time and all in the same place.
With the broader issue of faceapp, I’ve never used it, but on the other hand all the avenues that lead to my feminine side I’ve either clandestinely explored on my own, or more recently had the support of my wife to continue along. In another type of thread, I’d be branded as a deceiver and liar and all that is wrong with husbands who crossdress for how I went about that, so it seems wrong to come to this one and tell people when and how they should or shouldn’t show their own faces. Not ripping off someone else’s image or putting your head on someone else’s body is ethically obvious, for those who do I doubt it is approval they are seeking and they aren’t going to care about this topic. Dragging along with them so many others who earnestly identify as crossdressers, who participate in this community in good faith, whose preferred or maybe only way to have an outward facing image of feminization is faceapp, just because you don’t have to or would never, really seems heartless and petty. Giving the benefit of the doubt that they’d love to post a picture of their real face if they could, reflecting on your own good fortune that you can, and quietly being glad you aren’t them, should be harsh enough, if it matters so much.
Now, moving on to these made up names we all go by…
Very well said, Jill. Also, I had no idea there was so much tech going on in the phone camera. That is fascinating!
https://www.theverge.com/2016/10/18/13315168/google-pixel-camera-software-marc-levoy
This article is older, but of those I could locate quickly, goes into some detailed background.
Please,please, PLEASE tell me where they keep the horrible pictures, there doesn’t seem to be a lot going on lately and they would really cheer me up!
Thanx in anticipation……Sal x
Lol, Sally,
I couldn’t help chuckling … thanks
Marti xxx
🧚♀️🦋 I don’t know much about FaceApp, but as was alluded to by someone on this post, it’s difficult if not impossible to hide our male face structure.😬.yes makeup contouring can help a little bit, I suppose faceapp would alter that some for photos (?) but the way I try to reduce my male facial lines ( aside from makeup) is by using the long hair wig I have, 👩🦰 it covers the side of my face and tends to curl up under my chin too 🌺 maybe one day I won’t care about that, but it helps me to feel more fem.
🦋🧚♀️🌺🌸
I was here well over a year before there was even one picture that had my face.
if I remember correctly, it was my legs, with my painted toes at the end of them, in a pair of sandals.
that’s it.
it was ME!
that’s all that mattered.
and do you know what? facial recognition doesn’t work with toes, legs, a person in a dress with the head cropped off.
they were real, and they were me.
if y’all want to be “Max(ine) Headroom” (I know, Max Headroom is a 1980s reference), I don’t think there’s any rule about being fake CGI, though there would be if I could make it…
Understand that I’ll take your comments and opinions with as much trust as I put in how your face looks.I don’t really understand the “need” for realness – that’s just a Ru Paul meme, isn’t it?
Kinda questions what “realness” is.
I see self expression as a need, like food and shelter. Deny that and you stifle creativity, a fundamental human strength. The comedian Rowan Atkinson puts it extremely eloquently.
“Realness” is just a form of self expression.
Everything is computer generated on the internet – as one observant poster said, the very cameras we use manipulate the pictures we take in software – it’s how digital cameras work.
Even if you scanned a photo, it becomes digitised and manipulated.
There’s no black and white governing “realness”, but either self expression is limited via censorship or it’s not.
A picture of your legs is not really you – you’re hiding “you” and just displaying a part you want people to see.
An image of my face that I have manipulated to my taste, however, is an artistic expression of how I see myself and how I feel.
In a sense, it’s more a real picture of me than a part of my anatomy.
😍😍😍
Personally I dont care either way. I do think that it is great that all the ladies that do post pics have the strength to do so. It takes alot to literally put your face out there, touched up or not. Its no different than a GG using the same apps to change things up. And they do. If you dont agree with it thats your prerogative. Others use it and that’s theirs.
As long as we support each other and continue to build each others confidence. That is the point of this site. Right. To be supportive. To help each other. Calling some one a fake is not helping.
Let’s spread love and tolerance. That’s why I joined and that’s why I will stay.
💋
Trisha
Though I will admit to being a bit naive and gullible when it comes to the internet I would hope that we can all feel comfortable enough and secure enough with our fellow sisters here to be the real you. Yes, there are privacy issues for some, but if you cant be yourself here, where on earth can you be? True, I have it easier in a way by not having a wife and children to guard against, and most of my friends know, but I came here to come out. I love the socializing and information at CDH but I joined because I needed the support of some wonderful gals for coming out and accepting myself as I am. I love coming on line and seeing myself looking back at me. Not exactly “hot”, but not too masculine looking thank God. Would I love to look like Stevie Nick’s circa 1980’s? Damn right!! But it wouldn’t be me – as much as I wish it was. ( oh Lord, how I wish! Lol ). I want to be comfortable with who I am – and that’s the girl in the pic. I started out a bit rough, but I’m learning make up and improving, and that’s just fine with me.
Stevie
Just my 2 cents, and on the internet it’s free—
Presenting an image as you, that is no closer to your own feminine presentation, is NO better than taking a pic of another girl and claiming it your own.
I quietly call it “stolen valor”.
Every girl here started somewhere. And I think nearly every girl wants to be beyond where they are at. There’s not much about being a Tgirl that’s easy. Those that “present well” have gone through great effort to achieve it.
I’m not going to enter the fray again. I made my point crystal clear.
But PLEASE do not call it “stolen valor.”
I see both sides of this coin, like many other things. There are those of us who can now easily naturally pull off feminine looks. So we don’t even have to use forms,wigs or other things to make us look more fem. To me that doesn’t make me any different than those who have to. We are not fake if we need a little extra help. Now there are sadly the “fakes” who would utilize making themselves fem for nefarious reasons… I don’t think any of those are here.
The same can be said for natural/dressed images vs face app and other highly edited pics. There will sadly be those who want to use them for misrepresentation or other not so pleasant reasons… but I think for the most part they use them to show how they feel inside or who they long to be… I want to see everyone’s real self but since most of us from what I see are in hiding in one firm or another… it’s not always possible to get a good pic en fem.
An open mind is a thing wasted on thinking “your pic is edited therefore it doesn’t represent you” I think if they need an edited photo to show how they feel let them as long as they note it’s edited and they aren’t trying to tell you a pic of Mariah Carrie is them.
❤Tonya
FaceApp is so named because it only changes the face. For some (many?) girls here, how their face is presented (if at all) is very much secondary to other aspects of their feminine presentation, like clothes or shoes, or specific body parts (often legs), or a particularly striking pose.
Even when they are not comfortable showing their face because of the need for anonymity, or a lack of interest in makeup, or the presence of facial hair (shout out to Ms. Scott), hiding or altering their face still allows them to post photos where we can all appreciate these others aspects.
Yes, these other aspects can be faked as well but ultimately, who cares? You look at a photo, like it or not, comment or not, and move on with your life. I just don’t think it’s worth the time or effort to worry about.
oh, how easy is to talk about acceptance, but hard to do it, acceptance doest mean , others have to do, live as you live or do, it is respect their decision even when you dont agree with it, that is acceptance, not push them, not force something, but let things going naturally for each one, not according to me, acording for them, because each one has the right to express her feminnity as they want not as i want, put us in the dress of others that is the point, if you dont want to, that is your right but not for everyone, hugs a lot to all of you felicity
Well….
if you go down four miles to near the bottom of this discussion…I did say it would get heated….was i right? or was I right?….
So can we take a breath, cease fire and smile for a second….how about…
My little Jack Russell kept getting picked on by bigger dogs, so I face apped him…..he still gets attacked, but now he thinks he’s a Rottweiler, he doesn’t half fight back!!!….
Ok…..carry on….
Smiles, grace xx
Well firstly Billiejay you have certainly started a topic that has got a lot of people talking, which has to be a good thing. My take on this is, do what ever you are comfortable with, but be honest with yourself……..
If you want to use a face app to present yourself in the way you would like to be, thats fine, that is entirely your decision. So if you are in the closet or happy staying at home, then thats completely fine. But, there is always a ‘but’, if you want to go out into the world and have some wonderful experiences then you have to accept that you can not face app yourself in the real world. If you think you don’t look good enough, check out U tube there are lots of tutorials to offer advice, you can post on here and someone will probably have the answer to your problem. Makeup is not easy, but practice does indeed make perfect, you have to put in the time and effort.
I can see both sides of this argument and there is no simple answer, but my thinking is you have to be true to yourself, be yourself, what ever that maybe and enjoy life……………..
But do we all not misrepresent our natural self? Sheesh we are cross dressing to look like the opposite sex. I just discovered faceapp and was shocked at the amazing results it gave me with just a bit of long hair. I was actually going to post it but i guess I wont.
I have been watching this thread for a bit and this is the first time I have had to glance through the comments.
It seems to be quite a serious thread too.
I will state that the picture I use here is actually me, just with the head taken off. (I like how that sounds :-))
If you look at my huge hands you will see the clues.
My wife would probably not be happy with me using it because some close real life friends have seen it and know its me. This couple we know where he is a beautiful cross dresser hang on a minute, he is a STUNNING cross dresser and I am jealous LOL.
Anyway, they have seen it as have a couple of others.
I would suggest that if the face is an issue, just don’t show a face?
If someone uses a face pic and it is softened or maybe… I am not concerned at all. I base interest on what we all post. Pictures are nice though.I am going to risk leaving this hurriedly posted comment here and hopefully I got this right.
I will come back later on to see if I can read through more thoroughly.In the meantime everyone have the greatest day possible!
Celeste,
Not everyone here does that. Not everyone goes out, and even those that go out, they may not be going to meet anyone from here.
IF you want to meet up with someone from here, I feel fairly certain that with today’s many methods of communication, we might be able to find one that allows us to exchange pictures of how we’ll really appear in that moment without having to share it also with a bunch of other folks on here with whom you are not meeting?
I started a separate email group of Christian ladies here who want to respect this site’s rules but also need to discuss issues of CDing that are germane to our faith. A couple of us have exchanged photos that we don’t post here for everyone else to see because we have developed our own bond of trust.
The level of angst over the nature of pictures one decides to post (or not post) here simply stuns me as an epic example of utter hypocrisy. CDH is a great place for cross dressers of ALL stripes, levels, inclinations, desires to gather and discuss and support one another on a host of issues. The irony is that it is a site — by definition — for people who feel the need to sometimes present themselves in a way that is different/enhanced (if you will! 😂) from the way they actually appear in everyday life.
All the effort to do makeup and create a feminine figure and display beautiful tresses so that they can enjoy photos of themselves, yet for some apparently, there is a line of “authenticity” that must be drawn. MY level of inauthenticity is ok, but YOURS is not. That’s absurd, imho. And worse, it is uncharitable, insensitive and hypocritical.
Its like an episode of mean girls from junior high/high school who belittle the less naturally fortunate who desperately want to keep up with the pretty ones by stuffing their bras. I’ve heard about the “tyranny of passing,” but never gave it much thought until now.
Those are my thoughts. Judging from the majority of thanks and responses I’ve seen, I’m in the minority. That’s ok; I can handle it. For those that disagree, i’ll Just have to agree to disagree and move on.
Stephanie you are gorgeous sweetie, and don’t forget it either.
Celeste,
Im not comparing them exactly. They are differences in degree, but not kind. So who decides what the acceptable degree of inauthenticity is? And again, when someone clearly states, as I did, that their profile pic is not a real pic, and one can easily read it for themselves on the pic descriptions, I’m just as a loss as to what the argument is on the other side.
I’ll tell you what it smacks of: snobbery. A division of “classes” of CDers with the pinnacle being those who spend days weeks months years perfecting their look so they can go out, pass and blend, and then lecture everyone else about how they should do the same thing. Then, when one of them sees a girl out who doesn’t look as good, they are often the same ones who criticize the one who is trying and failing to pass as ruining it for everyone else because of the stares and ridicule they get. It’s a catch 22.
Not everyone here can go out. Not everyone here wants to do that. Not everyone here has the resources or opportunities to do that. Not everyone here has the features to pull it off, no matter how much practice they get.
Some people come here knowing they can and will never go out, but they want to project to everyone else as femininely as possible. So they alter, touch up, modify, and just make up photos to represent how they feel. Only to be smacked down for being inauthentic. Now that is the kind of thing that causes hurt feelings. And it is the height of hypocrisy among people who are here already because they want to project an image of something they are not.
And almost every actual girl I know has done or wanted to do some kind of glamour shots session so that their flaws are brushed away and their beauty is enhanced and magnified. Why should CDers be any different in trying to do some of the same things?
Very true!! 🌸 as they say, beauty is in the eye of the beholder! 🧚🏼🎀🧚♀️
Samantha,
With all due respect, you’re assuming some facts not in evidence. You’re assuming all here should have the same goal. You’re assuming that people can only be accepting of themselves if they are “moving forward” (which appears to mean working on their presentation to go out). You’re assuming that fully embracing their feminine sides and feminine appearance is the most important thing and that all other considerations should be subordinate. I think that’s the mistake of the original premise of the thread.
CDH has indeed helped me “move forward” so far but moving forward actually for me has nothing to do with my physical presentation. I’m not not going out because of fear or lack of acceptance of myself. I’m not going out because there are things more important than pleasing myself. Would I like to go out? Sure. Would I like to be able to spend hour upon hour perfecting makeup and fashion choices so I can go out and pass? Sure. Maybe someday I’ll get to go out to that place again. But not now and maybe never.
And so I always return to these two points because they are true and irrefutable. A “fake pic” that is clearly labeled as a “fake pic” is by definition NOT dishonest or deceiving. I even provide a full explanation of what it is from and why it is meaningful to me. Nobody is “tricked” by my photo. Anyone who has asked, I have told them the story of the pic and referred them to its explanation on my profile.
And the point of uncharitable hypocrisy remains in full force. Any cross dresser who tells another one that she is inauthentic, mocks the fact that the other one has a beard, refuses to be charitable about the person’s situation that is different than their own, and suggests that she would rather see cartoons and potted plants as their profile pic is just being mean. Period. There wasn’t anything about that message and the follow up messages that was encouraging or helpful. It was all critical.
You wonder whether I have self acceptance because I don’t dress and go out. Well, I know from my faith that I am accepted, loved and forgiven — all of me — and that means a heckuva lot more than another cross dresser’s opinion in an online forum. I’m fine with me. Im in an ongoing struggle with how this part of me — which I love, btw — fits in, but for me, that doesn’t mean it has to be about how I physically present to others. And What you actually seem to be talking about is whether I can make myself look good enough to get OTHERS to accept me. Of course, I’m not necessarily fine with how others would perceive me in this way. And now we can add to that group some of the very people you would THINK would be understanding, empathetic, and encouraging.
Steph
Read it carefully and thought about it a lot, actually.
That said, it can sometimes be difficult to get nuance and meaning from the written word. Did I miss something? Misunderstand something? That’s certainly possible!
Then I misunderstood that message, and I profusely apologize! I’m so sorry, and I pray that you forgive me for my misunderstanding!
Thank you for speaking for not only yourself, but for many of us. I, like you, have gained much through my sisterhood with others here. However, I have also been surprised by what I perceive is judgment of my behavior, or my motives, by some here.
As for being quite ugly…honey, you are one of the most beautiful women I’ve met here! You understand that we are all an illusion, to ourselves and others. And since this isn’t a hook up site (God forbid), any pics we post here are to celebrate us and how we see ourselves. We all have our reasons for everything we do, our parameters for how this gift fits into our lives, and the last thing I need from here is judgment, or “the rules” explained to me.
I have made so many friends here, I come here daily for insight, balance, words from others that are uplifting and encouraging. I have gained so much confidence. And I also know that there are many others here that dress for reasons similar to mine, and that live under similar circumstances. It has taken me many years to go from wearing my mom’s panties to becoming Haley in my 60s. So, am I really less real, less genuine if I touch up some photos? I never heard of FaceApp until I joined here, and I just tried it, and love that I can do gender and makeup mods for my pics if I wish. Yep, I bought the boobs, and the hair, but the smooth, slim, toned body…the physical characteristics I can control..are all mine baby, and this mid-60s girl works hard to look hot and sexy for him…and me. Is it the face I put forward, or the heart I put behind it that really matters?
Thanks again Stephanie❤️
Haley😘
What a brilliant comment on the REAL meaning of CDH! I have used one or two of the basic functions of FaceApp – most often ‘Makeup’ because I can’t afford the time nor the expense of having a more feminine appearance to go with my feminine clothes. With a couple of click s in FaceApp I can have a look that would take me hours to achieve with makeup, and without the cost of all the creams, powders, brushes, waxes, razors, tweezers etc. And I would pose this queston to those who seem to consider FaceApp to be lying, cheating etc. Do you consider wearing makeup, wigs, false breasts, even breastplates to be ‘real’. Surely all of these are forms of deception, of ourselves and to the the outside world but that deception is something we consider acceptable because we enjoy being something most of us are not – a male trying to adopt a feminine persona.
Awwwww…Haley…you are too kind but you made my day. Thank you! This place has come to mean a lot to me because of the kind folks like you who are here and the support and encouragement I get.
My goals are maybe slightly different than others. I guess some might perceive that I’m not self-accepting because of my objective self-assessment of my physical appearance, but that isn’t true. I love my Steph self. I love that God may have a plan for it. But I do struggle with how and where to integrate it into my life in a God-honoring and healthy way, especially given my wife’s strong objections. I dress in secret and very rarely, I don’t have much of anything at all to use, no makeup so I can’t practice, etc.
My goal is not to see how much of a girl I can make myself look like so I can “go out” and party. My goal is to figure out what do to exactly with this … gift/blessing .. and how to navigate the waters I’m in that externally discourage it. My goal is to discern God’s will for me in this endeavor. And I’m hopeful that I can occasionally derive a little personal pleasure from the dressing — the peace, relaxation, and joy of just resting in femininity for awhile with no pretenses about what I’m trying to do.
Dont get me wrong. I’d love if my circumstances would allow for me to shave my beard and apply makeup, and dress to interact with the world. I did get to do that for a few years and didn’t have a single bad experience. It was awesome. But I’m just not in that place anymore and may never get to be again. That makes me sad, but iT doesn’t make me think I’m somehow less authentic of a CDer. My profile pic, which I clearly state what it is and where it comes from, is a feminized likeness of me from 34 years ago. It’s not reality. It’s a bit of fantasy for sure. And I say so clearly. The eyes are mine, the features are softened versions of mine, but it isn’t me, and I never claimed it was. But the reason I put it out there was because it reflects who I sometimes feel like in a feminine sense on the inside, and I love that it reflects my own features to a certain degree. If I put the pic it originated from up there, you’d say my femme pic is my sister. So while I’m here at CDH, I look at that pic and smile and get to feel a little more feminine and like I am that girl in some sense. And that makes me happy. At least until someone calls me a fake and tells me they’d rather I put a cartoon or a potted plant as my profile pic because that would be more authentic.
And I DO have completely untouched authentic photos of actual me (just not my bearded lady face) in my public photos section. I didn’t even worry about lighting, enhancing, or any of that other stuff. Just looked in a mirror and snapped away! And I AM kinda proud of my feminine legs! Lol.
In any event, thank you for your encouragement! It means so much!
God bless,
Steph
Stephanie,
Thanks for asking! 😊
No, not forgiveness for being a CDer; it’s a reference to my faith. Forgiveness for being a sinner in general, regardless of what I’m wearing! 😊 🤗 It is about my personal relationship with Jesus Christ, who died for me to reconcile me to God. My personal source of true joy. Even if CDing IS a sin (I don’t believe it is so I don’t think I need forgiveness for it per se unless it’s causing me to sin in another way), I’m routinely committing far worse than wearing pink lacy panties and a dress 👗! Lol. But regardless of the sin, I am forgiven.
God bless,
Steph
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