- August 14, 2020 at 8:05 pm #374176Nick LacroixParticipantRegistered On: February 3, 2020Topics: 18Replies: 165Has thanked: 139 timesBeen thanked: 578 times
- August 16, 2020 at 9:00 am #374725Deborah SullivanParticipantRegistered On: February 27, 2020Topics: 1Replies: 303Has thanked: 1218 timesBeen thanked: 1021 times
When growing up I was teased about being too feminine and maybe because of my body gestures and behavior. We cant help the genes we were born with so live your life accordingly. Have no regrets.
- August 15, 2020 at 4:55 pm #374538Bettylou CoxParticipantRegistered On: May 26, 2019Topics: 16Replies: 1427Has thanked: 2313 timesBeen thanked: 4235 times
Interesting question, Nick; I should think that in the absence of a strong feminine side, one would never be inclined to Dress at all. Mine happens to be very active, but it wasn’t until some time after the Pink Fog overcame me a few short years ago that I recognized that truth.
- August 15, 2020 at 4:39 pm #374534
- August 15, 2020 at 4:33 pm #374533LucyParticipantRegistered On: August 4, 2020Topics: 0Replies: 12Has thanked: 229 timesBeen thanked: 37 times
- August 15, 2020 at 10:43 am #374367Jennifer SwansonParticipantRegistered On: April 20, 2019Topics: 43Replies: 153Has thanked: 3446 timesBeen thanked: 908 times
I must say that I am much happier when I am dressed. I have always had more feminine than masculine inclinations. I was never competitive or combative. I thought boys were cruel and crude. However I never felt attracted to boys. I always enjoyed being with girls. Dressing allows me to express that side of myself more freely. I understand what you’re saying Kay and that’s why you can never judge a book by its cover. If I transitioned I would only be interested in a cis or trans female partner.
- August 15, 2020 at 5:28 am #374258Ria FreichukParticipantRegistered On: June 6, 2020Topics: 2Replies: 64Has thanked: 93 timesBeen thanked: 241 times
- August 15, 2020 at 5:24 am #374257Stevie SteinerParticipantRegistered On: June 11, 2020Topics: 24Replies: 542Has thanked: 2356 timesBeen thanked: 2561 times
I think so. Depends how we define feminine. I have always had a ” soft ” look and side to me, and have been told at times ” you can be such a girl sometimes “. That came mostly from my excessive sensitivity and emotional intensity. Since my coming out ( on CDH at least ) it has become worse!!!! I can get emotional and start crying at the drop of a hat. Honest!! Its embarrassing watching some typically guy movie with others and getting teary eyed at every sensitive scene. It is annoying at times, but I CAN’T STOP IT! Wearing mascara is dangerous for me, knowing I could start crying over something as simple as a dead squirrel on the side of the road.
It has nothing to do with whether I am in drab or in my pretty clothes either. And that’s just how I am!
- August 15, 2020 at 4:51 am #374248
- August 15, 2020 at 3:41 am #374227Lee Ann RakersParticipantRegistered On: August 18, 2019Topics: 4Replies: 433Has thanked: 652 timesBeen thanked: 1290 times
I don’t know the answer to that.
I think dressing is for all of us is simply to go to a better place, even if it’s for a short period of time.
Love your makeup, by the way. I’m so jealous!
- August 15, 2020 at 3:12 am #374221Sharon WiltshireParticipantRegistered On: July 27, 2020Topics: 3Replies: 34Has thanked: 553 timesBeen thanked: 213 times
I have always had a soft exterior. It was picked up on at school and I was bullied for being ‘gay’ although I wasn’t, but obviously I didn’t conform to the usual masculine expectations.
- August 15, 2020 at 2:50 am #374219Kay AndersonParticipantRegistered On: June 1, 2020Topics: 16Replies: 488Has thanked: 4488 timesBeen thanked: 2520 times
I used to have a fake outer shell of a tough guy. I have shed that. I act more kinder and nurturing now. It’s probably not an obvious feminine behavior, but much different than the past.
- August 15, 2020 at 2:33 am #374218Alison AndersonParticipantRegistered On: October 15, 2018Topics: 3Replies: 317Has thanked: 152 timesBeen thanked: 1123 times
Masculine or feminine (or, gender, if you will) is a set of behaviors that are practiced by a group of people that confirm to themselves and others that they are who they say they are, that they “belong” to that group. In essence, it is a stereotype. But this can depend on the period of time you are asking, or on circumstances.
Some examples follow. Is makeup feminine? Male actors wear makeup to counteract the harsh lights. (The same can be said for TV personalities.) Or they wear makeup to change their appearance – make them look older, younger, or like someone else. Men wore “war paint.” (Notice how we change the words to try to enforce the concept of gender binary.)
Are skirts/dresses feminine? Men wear kilts, men wear bathrobes. Young boys used to wear dresses. Men wore “nightshirts” (think of Scrooge). Men wore togas. Men wore “robes” that are, for all practical purposes, dresses.
Is pink feminine? Many years ago, pink was a man’s color and blue a women’s color. This quickly changed with Jacqueline Kennedy wearing a pink outfit.
Is lace feminine? Renaissance and colonial noblemen wore shirts with wide lacy sleeves and lacy plackets.
Are sports masculine? There are plenty of women athletes. Attend any sporting event and there are plenty of women fans.
Even within any category, there are people who are outside the averages. You can easily find women who hate wearing dresses or skirts. We can find women who like to use tools to build things. We can find men who prefer pastel colors, or men who hate sports, or men who are nurturing. And here, we find many men who like wearing dresses or skirts or softer or more colorful tops. But we also find many men who like to wear women’s jeans.
Does fitting outside of the norm in one category mean you fit outside of the norm in another? Here too there is always a range. There are a number of members on this site who say they like to wear women’s clothing while they still have facial hair. So not everyone wants to go all out and be one extreme or another.
There are also plenty of gay men who have no desire to be effeminate. People’s belief that gay men like to be effeminate is why a crossdresser who comes out is usually asked first, “Are you gay?” I think the correlation between being gay and being feminine is not nearly as high as people believe.
So while many crossdressers enjoy other activities or behaviors that are stereotypically associated with women, we are each individuals and there is a whole range with each behavior or activity.
- August 15, 2020 at 12:56 am #374211AshleyParticipantRegistered On: May 25, 2019Topics: 4Replies: 164Has thanked: 435 timesBeen thanked: 529 times
I wouldn’t say I’ve ever been very feminine… I think the first time I got mistaken for my dad on the phone was when I was around 12, maybe even younger… but I’ve also always had my quirks. Like the way I move my hands. I remember being really self-conscious of that when I was younger, probably how I got into the habit of sticking my hands in my pockets. Now I let myself have fun with it 🙂
- August 14, 2020 at 8:57 pm #374189Tiff AnyParticipantRegistered On: June 1, 2019Topics: 0Replies: 820Has thanked: 2359 timesBeen thanked: 1981 times
- August 14, 2020 at 8:16 pm #374179Amy MyersParticipantRegistered On: February 11, 2019Topics: 14Replies: 1031Has thanked: 2586 timesBeen thanked: 2426 times
I think I do have a lot of feminine traits, but also male ones as well. It seems I have always been that way, but I think I’m more feminine now, at least in part because I don’t try to repress my feminine side now.
- August 14, 2020 at 8:12 pm #374178
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