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  • #712015
    Jayne
    Participant
    Registered On: June 24, 2021
    Topics: 5
    Replies: 25
    Has thanked: 92 times
    Been thanked: 144 times

    I was filling out a form today, and came up short when it asked me for my gender.  I think I will leave that question blank, in this case, but it made me stop and think about what would be the right response?  For gender, it provides boxes to check off for “transgender,” “nonbinary” and “other.”  There was no box provided, however, for “confused,” or “it depends.”

    I’m curious now, though, to know how you all have dealt with this type of question, on governmental or business forms, for census purposes, etc.  Did you ever want to put down “female,” or “nonbinary,” or transgender”?  Or actually do it?  Or do you do that as a matter of course?  And if so, when did you decide to start doing it?

Viewing 14 reply threads
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    Replies
    • #712576
      Lauren Mugnaia
      Duchess
      Registered On: November 1, 2021
      Topics: 23
      Replies: 629
      Has thanked: 10202 times
      Been thanked: 3507 times

      Hi girls,

      My driver’s license and medical card all have a picture of a lady named Lauren, so the boxes all contain an “F”. I’ve also legally changed my gender to female, which is allowed in the province where I live.
      So all forms will now say I’m a female.

      hugs,

      Ms. Lauren M

    • #712569
      Holly Morris
      Lady
      Registered On: April 15, 2022
      Topics: 104
      Replies: 280
      Has thanked: 3301 times
      Been thanked: 3253 times

      Whenever I see that question on a form, I always want to answer “Yes, when and where?” but that never seems to be an option! 😉

      You’ve gotta laugh…

      At least some government organizations and companies are beginning to realize that there are more options than just “male” and “female,” so at least that’s a step in the right direction.

      Hugs,

      Holly

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #712504
      Jill Lacey
      Lady
      Registered On: December 25, 2022
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 90
      Has thanked: 26 times
      Been thanked: 265 times

      If only male or female is offer3d, check the box of your assigned gender on your drivers licence. If nothing fits, check other if available. I always check transgender if offered, otherwise, I have to check m6 legal assigned gender, male, yes, I hate it.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #712438
      Kelly Lee
      Duchess - Annual
      Registered On: February 26, 2018
      Topics: 47
      Replies: 524
      Has thanked: 684 times
      Been thanked: 2370 times

      I’m wondering what does “gender” actually mean/classify? I know that sex != gender so we can skip that association.
      What does it actually mean to be “male” or “female”? Just because I wear clothes commonly worn by female, does that make me female? If so why doesn’t a female wearing a male shirt and male pants become “male”? (maybe because all drag queens aren’t female?)
      Are we talking personality? Manners?

      Anyway – what I check depends on what the purpose is.
      “Prefere not to say” whenever it is available
      “male” when we talking legal stuff like bank, passport and so on (I have no interest in transition full time)
      “cd”/”female”/”trans”/”other”/”non binary” when dealing with things like this site or keystone conference or so.

      /kelly

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #712225
      Fiona Black
      Baroness - Annual
      Registered On: November 23, 2019
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 422
      Has thanked: 268 times
      Been thanked: 1775 times

      All my legal documents are in my male name so I check male for that type of form. If it’s just a social survey or questionnaire, I check crossdresser or transgendered.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #712092
      Angela Booth
      Lady
      Registered On: August 1, 2020
      Topics: 9
      Replies: 1398
      Has thanked: 5097 times
      Been thanked: 6394 times

      I appreciate the problem. If the option is there you could use prefer not to say. However there is an option to declare it is up to you what you define as and if you feel comfortable making that declaration.

      It is important to remember that on any legal document that is asking for your real name and sex, without options, then that would have to be written.

       

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #712071
      Roberta Broussard
      Baroness
      Registered On: July 20, 2020
      Topics: 7
      Replies: 494
      Has thanked: 6608 times
      Been thanked: 2425 times

      If it’s just a questionnaire, I show female. If its personal, like an application for and account or at a doctor’s office I will show male.

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #712070
      Rozalyn Richards
      Lady
      Registered On: July 27, 2022
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 683
      Has thanked: 697 times
      Been thanked: 2658 times

      Does it matter what we put on these forms, we all know what we are don’t we, I don’t think any of us will change what we are unless we go the whole way and transition fully, anyway we are all sister’s on here X

      Hugs Rozalyn X

      3 users thanked author for this post.
      • #712506
        Jill Lacey
        Lady
        Registered On: December 25, 2022
        Topics: 2
        Replies: 90
        Has thanked: 26 times
        Been thanked: 265 times

        If only male or female is offer3d, check the box of your assigned gender on your drivers licence or passport.  If nothing fits, check other if available. I always check transgender if offered, otherwise, I usually check my legal assigned gender, male as it all exhausts me.  yes, I hate it.

         

        3 users thanked author for this post.
        • #712527
          Rozalyn Richards
          Lady
          Registered On: July 27, 2022
          Topics: 0
          Replies: 683
          Has thanked: 697 times
          Been thanked: 2658 times

          Hi Jill I’ve often been tempted to put on the forms where it says sex is yes please, lol X

          You have got to laugh sometimes X

          Hugs X

          3 users thanked author for this post.
          • #712562
            Jill Lacey
            Lady
            Registered On: December 25, 2022
            Topics: 2
            Replies: 90
            Has thanked: 26 times
            Been thanked: 265 times

            I have put , regularly , on before.

             

            2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #712064
      Саманта
      Managing Ambassador
      Registered On: January 21, 2018
      Topics: 888
      Replies: 1718
      Has thanked: 10062 times
      Been thanked: 6502 times

      what i put depends on the answer choices given.
      if transgender is given as an option, i put that.
      if not, i either put female or leave it blank.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
      • #712539
        Jayne
        Lady
        Registered On: June 24, 2021
        Topics: 5
        Replies: 25
        Has thanked: 92 times
        Been thanked: 144 times

        Cyrillic? Well that’s intriguing …

        1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #712060
      Kristen Smithly
      Lady
      Registered On: September 25, 2020
      Topics: 5
      Replies: 143
      Has thanked: 511 times
      Been thanked: 674 times

      Hi!
      I usually put non-binary or other. The last time I checked male was at my doctor’s clinic, the form said “gender assigned at birth” and the only choices were male, female. I put checked and then wrote, ” you can’t tell? You are supposed to be medical people. It was some stupid profile form for my record file. A friend, who is not a CDer, never checks any box, but writes down “you guess”

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #712057
      Emily Alt
      Hostess
      Registered On: August 24, 2019
      Topics: 24
      Replies: 1265
      Has thanked: 1405 times
      Been thanked: 6480 times

      My license has an X (non-binary), so that’s what I put on forms whenever possible.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
      • #712063
        Саманта
        Managing Ambassador
        Registered On: January 21, 2018
        Topics: 888
        Replies: 1718
        Has thanked: 10062 times
        Been thanked: 6502 times

        i wish they would allow that here

        2 users thanked author for this post.
        • #712065
          Emily Alt
          Hostess
          Registered On: August 24, 2019
          Topics: 24
          Replies: 1265
          Has thanked: 1405 times
          Been thanked: 6480 times

          I took advantage shortly after it was an option.  Did the same for my passport.  I’ll change again to F when I do a legal name change down the road.

          3 users thanked author for this post.
          • #712068
            Саманта
            Managing Ambassador
            Registered On: January 21, 2018
            Topics: 888
            Replies: 1718
            Has thanked: 10062 times
            Been thanked: 6502 times

            they floated it as an option here but it got shot down. pretty silly that apparently it’s illegal to be non binary in Indiana. i should just hush up about it but that one really cooked me.

            3 users thanked author for this post.
          • #712389
            Саманта
            Managing Ambassador
            Registered On: January 21, 2018
            Topics: 888
            Replies: 1718
            Has thanked: 10062 times
            Been thanked: 6502 times

            I’m going to have to revise my prior statement for the sake of providing current & accurate information.

            It has come to my attention that as of January 10, 2023 the Indiana BMV is now required to allow an X gender marker on drivers licenses.

            2 users thanked author for this post.
          • #712540
            Jayne
            Lady
            Registered On: June 24, 2021
            Topics: 5
            Replies: 25
            Has thanked: 92 times
            Been thanked: 144 times

            Count me as surprised, and pleased, that they’ve made such a change, out there in the (as a former Hoosier I think I can say this) Heart of Darkness.

            2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #712033
      Peta Mari
      Lady
      Registered On: September 30, 2020
      Topics: 31
      Replies: 611
      Has thanked: 970 times
      Been thanked: 3112 times

      I’m happy to present as male.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #712032
      Fredrika Jones
      Lady
      Registered On: February 24, 2021
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 487
      Has thanked: 583 times
      Been thanked: 1706 times

      When dealing with the outside world (in an “official” way – paperwork, or what have you), I just go male. At work I wear uniform clothing, so it’s easier to just go to and from work in uniform. On my time, I’m free to do it my way!
      Hugs and Kisses,
      Fredrika Jones

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #712025
      Cassie Jayson
      Duchess
      Registered On: September 29, 2019
      Topics: 71
      Replies: 1158
      Has thanked: 2705 times
      Been thanked: 5426 times

      A few months ago when I applied for a job at Torrid I told them I gave them both my fem name and my male name. Kinda had to because if the contacted my former employers they don’t know Cassie but do have records of Randy. Some of my co-workers there only know me as Cassie. The clinic where I go to the doctor now know me as Cassie. So far these switches have been easy and kind of fun.
      . Cassie

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #712019
      Caty Ryan
      Baroness
      Registered On: August 27, 2017
      Topics: 129
      Replies: 1195
      Has thanked: 8 times
      Been thanked: 5029 times

      When I first saw the heading, I was not sure if you meant anywhere between AA and G cup…..

      Sorry bad joke….

      Caty.

      PS I just stay “plain Joe male” on any forms such as you mention

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