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Well yes I must agree not always a welcome topic to talk about, but it’s rightfully a topic of interest. Here I was pondering I have a pre-paid funeral plan for cremation, but the problem I have is I am comfortable as Amanda as i am myself. A part of me wants to be cremated as both, apparently this not a problem according to the funeral directors (yes I checked). So I was wondering do other girls on here have similar ideas, plans or wishes for their cremation or interment.
Hi Amanda I never voted for me it’s “eau naturelle” naked no box just body and earth, Not for a long time I hope. It should give them a nice surprise when they meet me.
Love Sarah xx
Sarah I have amended my poll to include “Others” to allow for religious and other types of funerals arrangements. Lol Amanda xx
I’ve been wanting to bring up this topic for a long time; wasn’t sure how to broach it.
Before coming out to my wife, we would walk about how we wanted our funerals. I was never a fan of wearing a suit/tie, and I told my wife should I go, make sure I am wearing a t shirt and jeans as that is who i am. I also wanted everyone in attendance to not wear the traditional black, but as casual as possible.
Now that I have come out as Wendy, I really want to go as Wendy, fully dressed (wig, make up, …) as where I am going next I want to be in full femme mode, not drab. Not sure if my soul would rest easy if I went as drab.
Hi Amanda……
Ooooh…the grim reaper cometh!!.
I have thought about it a few times, and to be honest, I really don’t care. Once you are gone, you are gone. They can put me in a black bin liner and chuck me in the dustcart…..I won’t feel a thing!!!
Live your life while you are here girls!!!!!
Grace 🖤🖤
Grace my darling you are not going to be put into a black bin liner and thrown into a dust cart. If I have to pay for your funeral myself, you will go out with dignity, and in the style of Grace as we know and love. Lol Amanda xx
How kind…..I don’t think anyone has ever offered to buy me an outfit before ….even if it was a wooden overcoat!!!!
Thank you honey, I’m dead chuffed!!!!!
In the Jewish tradition, everyone is buried in a shroud, which is like a long rectangular white sheet that is folded around you and has ties to hold it in place. So that puts it in the missing “other” category.
Alison sweetie, I have amended the poll to include “Others” so you and other who are buried along religious beliefs can vote. Thank you for making a extremely valid point. Amanda xx
I checked the drab/male box; specifically, my Air Force uniform, along with the ashes of Hopalong Cassidy (the best bunny rabbit in the whole wide world, whom I loved dearly).
Bettylou
♥️🐰😂……Hopalong Cassidy.x
Thank you, Grace; Hoppy and I were bonded. Raised him from a baby and lost him to a heart attack at just over 5 years old (young, for a rabbit).
I think that lovely Bettylou, so sweet too.
Lol Amanda xx
no cares as long as my ashes are spread out on the Islands of St Tomas.
I read about a natural burial that was becoming popular, they wrap you in yesterday’s newspaper like a fish and bury you quickly.😎
I have thought a lot of this over the last 3 or 4 years. I should make some of the plans for my own funeral. The funeral is more for the living to remember the deceased than for the deceased. That being said I voted both for being buried in Fem and ‘I don’t care’.
On another note this past March my Mother passed away and I had some desire to go to the funeral in my little black dress. For unity and peace and remembering mom I wore my drab suit.. .Sandy
I am my SO’s care giver………….and would prefer she pre-decease me………………as for me……………I have no real family relationships………..no “real” friends…………….so………I probably will be found deceased…………..hopefully fully dressed as karley………………………..k
You too, Karley? I have kids nearby, and on good terms with them, but otherwise, my situation is the same as yours. And I hope they find Bettlyou.
Yes, me too, Karley. I’m a rabbit rescuer, currently with no rescuers and down to my last family rabbit (down from 4). But the kids know to contact Best Friends Houston or Bunny Buddies, and I have $5000 in an envelope in the gun safe earmarked for their transport and care. And I can trust my son-in-law to do the right thing. Can’t do any more than that.
Hugs,
Bettylou
Going to have to think about that one! Funeral is really about the living, but would be an amusing opportunity to tell those you hadn’t told before, lol. One final gag, as it were. I think if want to go really the way I’m most comfortable. In between, androgynous, maybe a men’s suit with heels, a blouse, and jewelry. I would want to to be an iconic look, at any rate.
Bridgette
Hi Amanda,
Thank you, your post reminded me of unfinished business. My will leaves my estate to my two step daughters, but they aren’t legally my next of kin. So I need to give them power of attorney or some such so they’re able to take charge of my death.
When my wife died, it was they who picked out a dress for her, and jewelry and her treasured trade mark flip flops. God forbid, if it happened to me tomorrow, I’m guessing they might already settle on one of my sarongs and a nice top, and yes, flip flops for me too. The fun would start when they checked out my wardrobe and realised they had more options to choose from. Lol, just like me, leaving them confused one last time!
Marti xxx
Oh Marti….I do agree…the look on the people’s faces who go through my belongings…..omg😂😂😂😂
Hi Grace,
That comment had me picturing the shock on my daughters’ faces. I wish I could be there to see it.Hugs,
Bettylou
I picked drab male.
Ironically, the undertaker will apply makeup to my face, neck, and hands. So I won’t be completely drab. (I might ask for some nailpolish.)
While I enjoy crossdressing, I don’t identify as female. I’d like to be buried in a sharp looking light blue suit. (As a farmer I don’t get to dress sharp all that often.)
Since I’m Swedish and in Sweden “open casket” isn’t really common (I don’t know any case of it) it’s not much of a point as to what I wear.
Now this does remind me of a thing I did see outside a funeral home in Sweden. It was a while ago so I don’t remember the exact details but it was a red dress and the text under goes down the lines of how he been a crossdresser but never left the closet. He wanted that at his funeral everyone – man and women – should wear a dress and it should finally be known who the true John really was.
Now he never wrote it down anywhere or told anyone so at his funeral nothing of that happened, it then ends with “tell someone how you want your funeral to be, remember that you won’t be around to do it”/kt
Hello Amanda, Yes not everbody likes to talk about it, but it comes to all of us at some time. Like yourself I have pre-arranged my funeral & are tobe cremated. I have left instructions that there is a box at my home with the clothes in it that I want to wear at my cremation, as you have guested they are my Helenmarie clothes. I decided that I want to go as Helenmarie, as I have spent most of my life dressing as her [ on & off ] & enjoying it why not go out enjoying it. The clothes in the box may change over time as my tastes change but I think it is a good idea to go as the girl you like to be. love, Helenmarie
That’s so beautiful Helenmarie, the box is a great idea. Unless your wish are written down, nobody knows what you would like. Lol Amanda xx
Cheer up girls…there is a brighter side…..thanks to Monty Python….
“For life is quite absurd
And death’s the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow
Forget about your sin
Give the audience a grin
Enjoy it, it’s your last chance anyhow”…..
….to be played as they chuck me in the dust cart…..
Smiles, grace xx
My old man’s a dustman,
He wears a dustman’s hat,
He wears cor blimey trousers,
And lives in a council flat.
Don’t you throw our Grace in there,
Call here friends instead,
Will be round to save our Grace,
And make her look her best.
OH, my old man’s a dustman, he wears a dustman’s hat,
He wears cor blimey trousers.
And lives in a council flat,
I’ll sure your all be wondering.,
On what we’ll all do then,
Will put her in her 50’s gear,
And drink her JD next,
OH my old man’s a dustman, he wears a dustman hat,
He wears cor blimey trousers,
And lives in a council flat,
Our Grace is just to good to bin,
We love her just to much,
Well take her past the charity shops,
And prop her up to look.
Ohhhhhhh my
Amanda…..🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
Brilliant!!!….I thought it had gone a bit too quiet in “Burton Towers”…..❤️❤️
Hang on!!!!! Nope still here my sweetie, stone extra after pigging out on ice cream the weekend. I ‘ve got you on the black bag watch list now, he he. Hugs Amanda 💋
Can I change my mind would like to have the funeral dancers like see all over the net. and a marching band behind them. of course dressed in drab.
It’s your funerals Donna, you can have multiple themes and services, just make sure you decide which one Donna wants, obviously before it’s to late.
In the case better get busy with arrangements. so much to do and such little time.
Hi Amanda, I recently decided to go the cremation route so no open casket for me. Plus my wife will outlive me by 20 years so she will get to decide despite whatever my wishes might be. So I’ll probably just be tossed naked into the fire, my ashes put in a box to sit on a shelf (or maybe even on top of the living room bookcase, a hallowed spot in our house) until my wife dies, and then our kids will bury us somewhere together. Though I have thought about having at least some of my ashes tossed in the wind on a peak (still undecided which one) in my beloved Rocky Mountains. Have a lovely rest of the week, Hugs, Krista.
Hi Krista, thanks for the reply, I think on the mountains together would be so romantic, such a beautiful place to be set free.
By the way any sign of a new dog yet, the summer is a great time to give an unwanted puppy or dog a new home and love. Have a great week too sweetie lol Amanda xx
Hi Amanda,
re: new dog – it has definitely been on my mind. I’ve checked out some of the dogs available at our local animal shelter. I’m thinking of getting a senior dog to make sure she’ll have a great last few years. Puppies go quickly while the senior dogs end up in the kennel for a long time.
But not quite ready for a new dog yet. My wife and I just learned that my daughter and her family bought a new house so because of the possession date and selling date they will have to move in with us for about a month. OMG, my Krista time will really shrink unless my wife decides it’s OK for me to tell them. My SO fears she may let it out accidentally as she has a hard time with keeping secrets. My oldest granddaughter is a bit of a snoop and has no problem asking questions. I think my daughter suspects anyways. She knows that my Mom gave me the name Krista, but that’s as much as I told her. She’s been talking to me about Caitlyn Jenner and she thinks that is cool. We just have to see how July unfolds; it will be a very interesting month.
I hope you are well, take care. Hugs, Krista.
Hi Krista, really nice that you are considering an older dog, it’s sad many are left for a long time, and indeed do make excellent pets.
Moving can such a problem, but it’s nice to be able to help and I am sure they are extremely grateful, and it will be nice to have some family time. As for Krista, well maybe this might be her time to shine who knows. I wish your daughter and family all the best in their new home “eventually”. Lol Amanda xx
Hi Krista,
Now you’re talking. My wife was cremated, but her ashes gave her new life. Between me, my friends and family, some have been taken to and scattered in some of her favourite places – some she already got to in life, some in afterlife. Some mundane, like a beach in Cornwall, or Glastonbury Tor, some exotic like Angkor Wat, or Haadrin beach … We tried to give her a good send off
As for me, there’s a hill I can see from my place called a mountain hereabouts. My kids understand that I’ll be happy to have my ashes scattered there to mingle with what’s left of hers.
Marti xxx
At 75 I’m still undecided. But some wonderful ideas have been brought up. My personal preferences would be en femme or stark naked. But realistically I know that if I go before my wife she will decide whatever I may want. And if anyone does show up they will be from her family. But I really do like Bettylous’ idea of taking Nefertiti’s ashes with me. After more that twenty years I still miss that beastie. She was my Siamese cat for sixteen years and probably loved me more that anyone else ever has! Now I’m tearing up just remembering her!
So I guess I will be surprised by with what I am going out in! I do know that I really really dislike the idea of being cremated. So I guess I will opt for the National Cemetery, though I would like to be buried in the cemetery where so much of my family is buried in the country (back to 1780). But I don’t think there is any space left there. I know for all you Brits that is such a long time ago but over here there aren’t many who can say that.Leslie💕
Ok got my casket picked nice hot pink with lace wrapped around it. inside soft satin. Oh going to have all my woman’s clothes donated to all the girls here. Oh wanting the song candle in the wind playing.
Donna…
I don’t have my black bin bag picked out but there’s a whole roll under my sink…and as I’m chucked into the dust cart I would like somebody to play 🎶I did it my way🎶……thank you xx
You welcome Grace anytime do hope those are the extra strength ones some break apart when lifting.
Love the song picked out too.
Donna
Hehe Yes Polly that song trying to get Elton to do it live or his look alike getting closer. I am princess have to go all out now. lol.
I voted “other” since I have a burial policy for cremation and no funeral service. I figured if you didn’t bother to visit me before I died, then why would I spend thousands for you to see me after I’m dead? I surely don’t want to be remembered laying in a casket but instead living a full life on my own terms and having fun…. Stephanie
I want to be buried at sea,
I don’t know who they will get to dig the grave, maybe Davy Jones, lol x
I might ask them to put me in a mermaids outfit, lol x
Hugs Roz xxxxx
Of course you can jeannie, there’s no harm in putting it in your Will x
Hugs Roz xxxxx
Be careful what you wish for, she may be an excellent diver.
Specially for Roz, who was enquiring about bring buried at sea…..I have a suggestion for you….
Murphy and Murphys aquatic burial service
Okay, they were a bit bad at first….
they used to go to sea and dig a grave, go back for the coffin, but when they went out to sea again, they could never find the hole!!!…
Once they realised that where you dug the hole, you put a cross on the side of the boat, then when you returned you were always in the right place, the cross was always just above the hole!!!!..now they are experts at it.
I think for a small extra fee, they will provide a musical accompaniment while your ex dances on the hole…..once it’s filled in,.of course.
I hope this helps xxx.
All at sea, Grace❤️❤️
As much as I would like to say that I would liked to be buried in a dress, I just can’t do it. My crossdressing as been a secret to my children (although I think they suspect something) so why would o want to shock them at my end. Unless something happens to change my lifestyle I will be buried in drab. I will enjoy my femininity while I am alive, with all the friends I have made here on this site. The sad part is if I were to die tomorrow most of my friends here would have no way of even knowing I was gone. They may think I just took a break for a while, that is sad.
I will be buried fully femme. My wife and I have already chose the dress and jewelry I will be buried in and have a pic set aside for the mortician to see how my makeup is to be applied. Since my name was legally changed it will say Jennifer Lynn on my headstone. I will spend eternity as I have spent the happiest days of my life.
That’s beautiful Jennifer
This is something some other CD friends and I discussed a bit some months ago. Since so many of us dress in secret, and stay that way the secret will die with us. However in a way it is too bad to hide this important part of who you were.
I voted for half and half as I said to someone a while ago I’d like to buried in my first mini skirt, a nice black faux leather one. Whether or not this will really happen, I don’t know. What I do know is the circle of those “in the know” about Amy widens a bit all the time.
I’d love to happen is to have at least a few pictures of me presenting as Amy along with the rest of the usual pictures from one’s past which are displayed for all the mourners to see. My hope is to have a few of Amy. Naturally I hope that this will not happen for many more years!
The other very real thing is what happens to all your clothes, etc? If the passing is sudden then whomever is left will discover the secret you kept so well hidden for so long.
Amy
Full on Femme with boobs on display, legs akimbo, sissy maid dress, arms across/under my bust with the middle finger of each hand outstretched! Buried with all the garnishing of sex toys and silk rope!
A big goodbye to all the doubters and haters!
Punchy (though deceased) Polly 🕋💣🪦⚰️⚱️🗝🎵🎶⚫️⬛️🔔🏴🏴☠️😎💀🖕🏼🦾👣🦿💄🧛🏼🧟♀️🧛🏼♀️🧖🏼🕴🏼🎩👝🕶🐜🐈⬛🪨🌪🦪🍷🎱🛼🎗♟🎳🎯
Gosh Polly, you may need a bigger coffin sweetie. But I like your style
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