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Recent events have caused me to review my behavior when passing people outdoors on the sidewalk. I am always dressed en femme and I noticed a difference in people’s reactions to me depending on the way I acknowledged them.
Years of male gender training guided me to give the typical male passing greeting of a nod of the head. For the men this resulted in either a similar greeting or an ugly scowl accompanied with a huff. For the women it was either a smile or ignore me. I’m not totally passable but I’m ok but this response made me realize that my greeting behavior tipped them off.
So what is the proper way to acknowledge someone? After observing women pass others I saw two predominant behaviors. Smiling and ignoring. When passing a female they almost always smile. When passing a male they either smile or ignore. A hello or other verbal greeting only occures if they are met with a return smile.
I tested this behavior and smiled at everyone. The results were positive. I received return smiles from all of the women and a few hellos. From the men I received return smiles or nothing but no negative looks.
The take away from this? SMILE !!! Ditch the male affectations and BE a woman. It will make your en femme outings so much more fun.
Love and hugs,
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