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  • #714521
    Fiona-Ann Moss
    Registered On: October 7, 2018
    Topics: 402
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    Hi Everyone. Pondering whilst sitting in the car eating my lunch, my mind wandered into thinking have i actually turned into a better person since cross dressing? Weird question eh? But then, i am a weird person lol.

    It has certainly given me an insight into my own life, meaning, i am the person i always wished to be instead of trying to con myself and everyone else. Dressing instantly makes me feel more positive inside, i feel i can solve the mysteries of the universe and i reasoned, its simply because i am happy Dressing. Lets face it, if you are forced to be drab, you are hardly likely to see much positvity in your life?

    For those of you that dont get much of a chance to dress, i can imagine, just how i felt, how much of a struggle and personally a soul destroying situation that can form.

    I have absolutely no doubt that given the chance to Dress at your own leisure Many of us would not be so depressed. So my question is….. does cross dressing affect your well being? Do you feel much more positive in yourself being dressed? Do you feel you can accomplish more Dressed up?

    For myself, i generally feel much more Positive than i did Three years ago because i can dress more.

    Something to think about……

    Fiona xx

Viewing 43 reply threads
  • Author
    • #722318
      Joy Joy
      Registered On: October 20, 2020
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 4
      Has thanked: 1 time
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      Ifell in love with myself

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      • #722319
        Joy Joy
        Registered On: October 20, 2020
        Topics: 0
        Replies: 4
        Has thanked: 1 time
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        I do yoga

        1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #722313
      Jessica Charms
      Registered On: May 6, 2021
      Topics: 32
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      Well, I know it’s made me a better person. I’m more relaxed, calm, and happy. But aside from the dopamine effects, I have been taking better care of myself, been watching what I eat, working out a bit more.
      So yes, for me it has.

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    • #722263
      Lucy Bancroft
      Registered On: October 11, 2022
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 32
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      The jury is still out as to whether Crossdressing has made me a better person.
      What I can say for certain is that when dressed, I feel so much calmer and less stressed than I often feel on a day to day basis.

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #722170
      Gabriela Romani
      Managing Ambassador
      Registered On: January 11, 2021
      Topics: 1346
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      Since my earliest memory of my crossdressing is from my early childhood, can’t really tell if I could have become a better or a worse person without it.

      However, I can tell with certainty that what has made me a much better person was being able to accept my crossdressing as a very important part of who I am. And that acceptance brought along the need to stop separating the “masculine” and “feminine” sides of me and integrating them in a better, much more balanced and healthier persona.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #722156
      Janet Woodham
      Registered On: January 21, 2021
      Topics: 1
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      Hi Fiona-Ann,

      Whether I am better person is not for me to say. I am certainly more relaxed and at peace dressed.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #722028
      Registered On: April 18, 2022
      Topics: 9
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      No I do not. In some cases I see that it has set me back. I get carried away with time and before I know it the PINK FOG has wasted a few hours and I fall behind. I do think it relaxes me sometimes and I enjoy dressing as often as I can but, I do feel like its a distraction some times.

    • #715801
      Tonya Johnson
      Registered On: July 17, 2021
      Topics: 1
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      Hi Fiona. You posed a great question.
      For me the answer is a definite yes. I think that I am a very confidante person anyway but when I present as Tonya it is look out world. As Tonya I feel that I am much more relaxed and friendlier when I’m out and about.

      ❤️ Tonya

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    • #715787
      Patty Phose
      Registered On: May 7, 2016
      Topics: 0
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      I’ve been dressing at home since I was 4. My mom and grandmother were OK with it and provided me with most of my clothes. But I was not allowed to dress openly in the house when my father, grandfather or when company was over. Looking back, I don’t think that made me a better person.

      My next phase was buying my own clothes and wearing them out in public. I loved the experience, excitement and thrill of it, but leaving the house I had to underdress, wearing my pantyhose, short girls shorts under my long pants and my bra under my shirt. I would walk out to my car and drive to a nearby park. I would get my wig, shoes and breast forms out of the trunk, go back in the car, slide off my long pants and put on my shoes, put in my breastforms and put on my wig. Then I would spend the day out in femme mode, driving, walking around, doing some shopping and just loving the thrill, excitement and rush of wearing great, sexy clothes and being a girl. Since I was doing this while sneaking past my family, going out looking more like a sexy girl and less like me, I don’t think made me a better person.

      Then at 18, I got my own place, got a lot of great, sexy clothes, began dressing often and freely and went out a lot. I began dressing for college parties. I often got a bit adventurous and flirtatious. I teased and let others do things to me I never would have tolerated or allowed in guy mode. But in femme mode it often was wonderful. Did that make me a better person? I think not.

      My dressing was based on fantasies, dreams and wanting to wear wonderful clothes like pantyhose, heels, short shorts, have pretty hair and nice breasts. I wanted to experience being a sexy girl and showing myself off as one. I sought the thrill, excitement and rush of it all. Did any of that make me a better person? I don’t think so.

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    • #715183
      Skye Ferguson
      Registered On: January 20, 2023
      Topics: 1
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      Hi Fiona!
      Yes I think it has. Being more overtly in touch with my femininity, and not feeling pressured to hide this part of me, I feel that I am much more relaxed, much nicer and way more chatty! lol

      Love Skye xx

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #715170
      Holly Morris
      Registered On: April 15, 2022
      Topics: 117
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      Fiona-Ann, this is another great question!

      For me the answer is definitely, unequivocally yes! There’s no doubt in my mind about that. I’m kinder, more tolerant, nicer, I listen more, I listen better, I care more about others, I don’t judge as quickly, etc. And all because I’m a crossdresser!

      I could go on and on, but I know you’ve all seen different articles I’ve written, posts and polls I’ve put up, so I guess many of you have a pretty good idea of where I’m coming from.

      Yes, being a crossdresser makes me a better person!

      And how wonderful that is!



    • #715168
      Lisa Leigh
      Registered On: April 20, 2022
      Topics: 5
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      I can say this. I do think about and see things differently now than many many moons ago. I am a life long crossdresser and over the years I do believe it’s made me a better person. See things from others point of view. Putting my self in their place, how would I react. If I have learned anything I’ve stride to make my wife’s life more sound, financial and in all other ways more secure. (I had more to say, but I cut it out as it might be seen as political.)
      Five years or so ago a woman was promoted ahead of me to become the head the division. I really didn’t mind, I didn’t care for those duties as I enjoyed what mine were already. Soon enough all the guys would come up and blame me that “I was empowering her!” I told them, I was just supporting and helping her. I told them I didn’t want the job anyway. They were upset because a man didn’t get the job, and the new boss to them was a woman. It took several years and now they realize she was and is the right person for the job.

    • #715158
      J J
      Registered On: September 13, 2019
      Topics: 8
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      It certainly has given me a different perspective about inclusion and intolerance. I have always been open minded and accepting of others with different view points, races, religions, sexual orientation, et al, or at least try to. Of course it is easy for a white, older male who has benefited from all that privilege, but once I accepted that am a CD, I realized I am now in one small way also part of one of the groups less tolerated by society. Of course it is relatively easy to hide my dressing by not dressing or undressing, so I don’t pretend to be as repressed as many groups, but I do get a better understanding of repression as a CD then I do as an old white guy.

      I am more willing to stand up for the under dog, whom ever that might be.

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #715073
      Lara Tucker
      Registered On: September 29, 2021
      Topics: 2
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      I feel like I become a bit more accepting of other people that don’t fit into society’s “normal” category. Not that I wasn’t before, but I feel more so now. I’m also happier since the woman inside can express herself a little bit around the house.


    • #715017
      Lola Caprice
      Registered On: May 26, 2021
      Topics: 13
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      Absolutely.  My journey has included getting to know so many girls here on CDH.  I have had my struggles but I am not unhappy with my birth gender.  Before I started crossdressing. which led me to this community I had no idea how difficult it is for those who feel trapped in a gender they aren’t comfortable with.   I have always considered myself very open-minded but it wasn’t until I became part of this community that I gained some level of understanding of the struggles faced by so many people every day of their lives.

      When I first started crossdressing fairly regularly, a few times a month, I came to the conclusion that I must be, on some level, trans because why else would an otherwise heterosexual male love being feminine as much as I do.  But then I started getting to know some lovely trans women here and reading about the difficulty they often face deciding to transition, the impact that will have on their lives and relationships, decisions about how far to take their transition, challenges caused by HRT, and physical transition, career issues…the list goes on.  The fact that I have not had to make those decisions and deal with those challenges makes me feel that in a way it is  disrespectful to truly trans women for me to call myself trans.  I have not paid the dues required to part of that beautiful community.

      To all who struggle, I love you and I hope you find a path to happiness!  I have no answers for you but I’m always willing to listen and let you know that I care, lots of us here care…and you are beautiful!


    • #715014
      Registered On: November 5, 2019
      Topics: 14
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      Hi Fiona, well for me anyway, I’d have to consider it a sort of chicken and egg thing, have I always been trying to be a better person independently of cd-ing or has crossdressing (or being tg) encouraged me to be that way?   I don’t think I would have been a ‘bad’ person if I never cross-dressed, maybe a little more depressed. But from early on, I’ve always had what some call sympathy pains for others.  I’ve never liked to see anyone hurt either physically or emotionally, so I’ve always tried to act in a way that recognizes others have feelings and concerns and problems and sometimes want a little consideration from those around them. And maybe my tg feelings have helped me be a little more understanding of possibly some of the issues that others face, whether it’s being marginalized or looked down upon or shunned.  Like competitions for instance, I don’t like to lose, but it’s obvious almost everyone else doesn’t like to lose either, so my winning means someone has some sorrow in losing and I don’t like that, so I shy away from things like that focusing on testing myself against what I think I’m capable of. That’s why I prefer casual sports like golf or alpine skiing, I’m out there having fun and not competing against anyone but how well I think I could be doing.

      Hugs, ChloëC

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    • #715005
      Fredrika Jones
      Registered On: February 24, 2021
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 501
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      Quite simply, yes – I’m expressing a beautiful part of myself, so I definitely feel better when doing it!
      Higs and Kisses,
      Fredrika Jones

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #714956
      Karensa Peacher
      Registered On: March 22, 2019
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 34
      Has thanked: 93 times
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      Hi Fiona,

      Yes! With regard to being open to different people of various backgrounds and it’s the overall spin off from MLK “it’s the content of their character, not the color of their skin” or dress and more. Pretty simple and helps me be open to the uniqueness of each person I meet and interact with.


    • #714954
      Fiona Black
      Baroness - Annual
      Registered On: November 23, 2019
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 537
      Has thanked: 391 times
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      It has made me happier and more content with my life and made me more understanding of others who are different than me. I also have been able to view the world through the eyes of both a man and a woman. Add it all up and I think I am better than I was previously.

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #714862
      Kandace Kussen
      Registered On: January 5, 2023
      Topics: 10
      Replies: 52
      Has thanked: 242 times
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      First congrats Fiona on your Ambassadorship!!!! Yes I do feel like crossdressing has made me a better person. Exploring my feminine side has made me more patient, more compassionate and relaxed. With that all said I haven’t shared my dressing with my wife ( my story in my bio) but hopefully will share soon which will make me even a better person! Once again congrats Fiona!!

    • #714783
      J J
      Registered On: September 13, 2019
      Topics: 8
      Replies: 709
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      I would yes, because I am a happier person, and I think that carries on into my general life. I enjoy dressing  and it puts me in a happy mood. Some of that happy mood stays with me, dressed or not.

    • #714752
      Suzanne Martin
      Registered On: January 8, 2020
      Topics: 6
      Replies: 476
      Has thanked: 1987 times
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      Fiona –

      As always an interesting question.

      I would have to say that it has.  First, I’m no longer hiding that part of me.  I am only out to my wife, therapist and lovely ladies here, but I’m not keeping my feminine side under wraps anymore.  By doing so I feel I am more aware of my feelings and getting in touch with m kinder, gentler self.  My wife has commented a number of times that if I don’t have opportunities to dress that I get depressed and moody.  I have discussed this with my therapist an she says it is normal to feel the way I do.  It’s interesting because I dress for my sessions on occasion and I find they have a different feel to them.  I think it makes it easier to discuss Suzanne and her role in my life when I present as her.


    • #714751
      Ashley Konners
      Registered On: August 15, 2020
      Topics: 45
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      Well I’m not patting myself on the back but I was raised to be respectful, kind , caring and came from a loving family so I consider myself to be a pretty good person.  As far as my crossdressing making me a better person I would have to say it makes me much happier which reflects in the way I treat others so yes I guess I’m a better person and I’ve learned to appreciate everyone in there own way. I don’t judge people for the way they present themselves or their beliefs but rather who they are.

    • #714740
      Michelle Davis
      Registered On: August 19, 2021
      Topics: 22
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      Has thanked: 2087 times
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      I think I am a better person because I am a crossdresser than if I had been born without this feminine part of my brain. I’m more caring, empathetic, and loyal partner than I think I would have been otherwise. When I have tried to deny this part of me over the years, I have gotten anxious and irritable until I finally let myself be me.  I  then feel a calmness and joy that comes over me that makes me happy.

      It’s taken most of my life to accept that I am a crossdresser and that it’s not a life style choice for me. I’m finally letting go of the guilt and shame although I still feel bad about making my wife have to deal with this part of me which is very difficult for her.

    • #714734
      Kris Burton
      Registered On: August 6, 2022
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 129
      Has thanked: 572 times
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      Crossdressing has given me a release from depression that has hung over me most of  my life. In my alter ego I can focus on the present and not dwell upon regret and negativity of the past, and at the same time appreciate those things in my life which have been very positive. It has had a better effect on my overall outlook  than all of the therapy I have had over the years. It clearly fills a void in my psyche!

    • #714725
      Caroline Davidson
      Registered On: January 31, 2023
      Topics: 1
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      Has thanked: 25 times
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      Simple answer – yes!

      I know this because my partner has told me so. Before I came out to her I had become (apparently!) very quiet, inward-looking and easily irritated. After I told her about my crossdressing needs and she welcomed this new ‘other’ me into her life, she noted that I am happier (obviously), more caring, more sharing (I was never one to talk easily about feelings in guy mode), loving and just generally nicer!

      Good thing the ‘new me’ is here to stay 🙂

    • #714713
      Marg Produe
      Registered On: March 16, 2022
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 400
      Has thanked: 1853 times
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      Once at a funeral, I told a family member that I was a better person for having known the deceased (in this case her sister).  I think that living as a woman has been a parallel to that experience.  I don’t really see my self as a crossdresser but rather as an intersex person with a full time woman’s body and I dress accordingly.  When I first accepted my intersex condition years ago and began to live authentically I thought that the whole experience might be an interesting experiment (I’m a trained scientist).  However, it quickly evolved from a necessary lab approach into a unique rest of life experience.  Knowing me (Marg) did make me better and hopefully make me able to pay it forward to others.  In the time that I have known her she taught me skills and tolerance and compassion and joy and heartbreak and understanding and yet to know things.  So yes Fiona, it has made me a better person.   Thank you,  Marg

    • #714711
      Caty Ryan
      Registered On: August 27, 2017
      Topics: 133
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      Definitely… Cos when I’m in full on Caty mode, (As in right now, first time for “23).

      I’ve had my fair share of mental health problems in the last 5-6 years, which in latter times means I dont cope well with any kind of stress.

      As a therapist told me about a year ago, “Caty takes you to another place”. That place is one of calmness and feeling like she is an integral part of me and has been for decades.

      Right now I’m away from home on an overnight charity business trip and it feels just right to be made up and dressed in my finest silk lingerie, with bra on and forms attached. I can smell my Estee Lauder “Beautiful” dusting powder  and perfume and “everything seems right with the world”

      It will be lovely sleep femme tonight, but then these days with me in my on room up the other end of the house and a DADT SO, I do that every night these days.

      We CD/TS’s commonly have a strong feminine side and I know from lots of lovely experiences, that this has helped me make a number of wonderful female friends over the years. Purely platonic… But very, very deep in at least two instances, where I told them about Caty. They never batted an eyelid.

      Sadly both ladies live a long way from me and these days, I dont travel outside Australia. So no more face to face catch ups.

      Happy dressing




    • #714698
      Jess Secret
      Registered On: February 18, 2021
      Topics: 15
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      Has thanked: 1502 times
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      I definitely have more self esteem and feel better about myself as Jess than in male mode. I feel beautiful, calm, relaxed, free of anxiety, more in touch with my emotions, etc. as Jess so I would definitely say yes it’s made me a better person.

    • #714677
      Liara Wolfe
      Registered On: August 14, 2021
      Topics: 4
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      Has thanked: 3655 times
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      To put it simple, I feel happy when dressed.

      Hugs, Liara

    • #714671
      Lorraine Lowry
      Registered On: January 2, 2023
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 150
      Has thanked: 261 times
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      This question cuts me to the bone.  The key word is tolerant,  now that I’m the picked on minority.  I never was opposed to different lifestyles but felt they should keep it behind closed doors.    How dare I play God and pass judgement on what another person could do or not do!  I am ashamed of the way I was and now try to live every day not just with tolerance but with kindness and understanding.  Yes, you’re damm right it changed me I feel for the better.  Thank you all sisters, I hope I have not offended.

    • #714633
      Stephanie Bass
      Registered On: November 30, 2019
      Topics: 28
      Replies: 4536
      Has thanked: 66095 times
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      Hi Fiona  I can truthfully say yes just ask my wife ha ha .. Really we have discussed this as she says im  more easier to talk to and be around especially if i had a bad rough day at work when i get home she suggests i go find Stephanie and calm down a lot ..  When i dress as Stephanie my whole world changes for the better so thats a big yes girlfriend ..

      Stephanie Bass

    • #714599
      Lauren Mugnaia
      Registered On: November 1, 2021
      Topics: 28
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      Has thanked: 12651 times
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      Hi girls,

      I don’t think it has…I KNOW IT HAS!! I am a trans woman and dressing everyday has had such a positive effect upon my life that even my doctor and my cardiologist have noticed the difference.
      At work, where I transitioned, my co workers say that I’m so much happier and full of joy that they can’t even remember who I was before.

      Big hugs girls,

      Ms. Lauren M

    • #714591
      AnnaBeth Black
      Registered On: December 31, 2022
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 117
      Has thanked: 837 times
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      I think being in touch with my feminine side aka crossdressing does make me a better person. As much as I think my wife would disapprove of my crossdressing she loves my sensitivity and the fact that I like to cook and clean the house. There is no doubt in my mind that it has made me better person. It’s just a shame she wouldn’t appreciate me cleaning the house in a French maid outfit.

    • #714588
      Registered On: March 19, 2021
      Topics: 15
      Replies: 151
      Has thanked: 47 times
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      I’d say yes. I believe I am more happy, I help the people I know more, I agree to listen to others more, I take better care of myself hun, I can cheer up people using female dialogue, I’m more careful with my nail, especially after getting a manicure and pedicure girlfriend. So I am glad I am a crossdresser that wants to evolve even more honey.

    • #714585
      Stephanie Muse
      Registered On: January 3, 2023
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 45
      Has thanked: 178 times
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      Does it make me a better person in general? I think so. I tend to be a lot more empathetic and sensitive to the feelings of others. The women in my life probably appreciate the fact that I do not act like the stereotypical male. (they don’t know) As for myself, dressing has given me a sense of peace and accomplishment with respect to growing my feminine side. I no longer experience the guilt and self loathing that I used to. I accepted and truly made friends with the woman staring back at me in the mirror. I love this part of myself instead of being confused about it.

    • #714580
      Jillian(Jill) Evers
      Registered On: August 2, 2022
      Topics: 5
      Replies: 71
      Has thanked: 364 times
      Been thanked: 374 times

      Hi Fiona,
      The Physical change, changes every thing .. My whole mindset is affected & always More
      Positively.. I am never depressed and Always So Excited when I see Me in the Mirror to start the day!!
      I think I know how an animal feels being let back into the Wild!! I Love it, It’s where I belong..
      XoXo Jill💖

    • #714573
      Cassie Jayson
      Registered On: September 29, 2019
      Topics: 76
      Replies: 1235
      Has thanked: 2867 times
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      I think I am. Since I am out to a higher degree than most here and much more than I ever expected I would EVER be. My nails are painted all day every day weather in male mode or fem mode. I use that to compliment many ladies on their nails. Often in female mode I give compliments on hair,tops, shoes/boots and hair color/styles. Now I notice these things more than ever.

      . Cassie

    • #714566
      Peggy Sue Williams
      Duchess - Annual
      Registered On: June 26, 2019
      Topics: 26
      Replies: 494
      Has thanked: 1924 times
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      In a very few words,  coming out as a cross dresser and going out in public cross dressed has allowed me to be my authentic self and is an essential vital part of my recovery program from alcoholism.

    • #714545
      Sarah Cerise
      Registered On: September 25, 2022
      Topics: 6
      Replies: 214
      Has thanked: 543 times
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      Hi Fiona
      I personally do think it makes you a nicer person, I have found myself more eager to listen to other people and there problems and things that bother them. I always feel more relaxed and chilled out when en femme, I have also noticed people are more willing to chat and open up.
      Sarah xx

    • #714541
      Jerri Newman
      Registered On: April 6, 2022
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 53
      Has thanked: 649 times
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      For me, I do not think it has made me a better person. Instead, I feel like this is an addiction, and it is taken away from my important relationships in my life. Although I do love doing it.

    • #714540
      Jennifer Connolly
      Registered On: November 27, 2022
      Topics: 14
      Replies: 173
      Has thanked: 526 times
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      Maybe better and different for sure.  For one thing, l can relate, I think a lot better as to how GGs feel when they want to go out to a place where you can dress for the occasion.  I never understood all the trouble that  that entailed, as a male, but as a female, I can understand just the thrill of putting all of it together.  I am a better person for having seen how both males and females feel when they are all dressed up.  I can say for sure that if I have a choice to go out in a suit and tie, or a nice dress, I’d for sure pick the dress.

      I’ve also noticed more of a calmness to me that has started to take hold because I can now express myself whenever I want to.  I am really free to be a woman whenever the urge hits me, not when the right situation presents itself.  I am only inhibited by my own fears for doing what I do, but am trying to cope to overcome those too.  Maybe someday!

    • #714539
      Michelle McQueen
      Registered On: June 14, 2021
      Topics: 31
      Replies: 1895
      Has thanked: 14588 times
      Been thanked: 9572 times

      Yes, I’m a much happier and contended person now after coming out to the wife years ago. She has even commented on how peaceful I am now and I don’t get depressed like I used to. I would get anxious and depressed when I was in the closet because of that hidden persona we all carry with us like an electronic ankle bracelet never letting us forget its there and never free of it. If you can find some way to embrace your fem self it will change your life.

    • #714538
      Holly Marie
      Registered On: August 8, 2022
      Topics: 13
      Replies: 158
      Has thanked: 173 times
      Been thanked: 759 times

      Yes, Yes, YES!!!  Not the most subtle way of saying it, but so, so true…  Holly XXX

    • #714525
      Sarah Kanter
      Registered On: April 25, 2019
      Topics: 18
      Replies: 199
      Has thanked: 455 times
      Been thanked: 1108 times

      I think it has for me. It’s made me think differently, and deeper, about a lot of things. I also think I’m kinder and more understanding of people who are different from me. I probably would have said I was already all of those things, but I think the experience of exploring this aspect of myself has had benefits.

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