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    • #723782
      Caty Ryan

      Thanks to everyone for their kind thanks and posts about this topic.

      I forgot to include one important factor and that’s what I term my “male underwear guilt trip”.

      If as I stated I/we spend a lot of time maintaining our femme lives “in secret” with femme laundry at the top of the list, it follows that if we did not put out some male “socks and jocks”, (US trans “tighty whities), “questions are sure to be asked in the house”.

      Thus for at least the last two years my wonderful beloved has been washing already clean “socks and jocks”. I’d love to tell her not to bother, but we all know where, in a DADT household, where that leads to.

      Anyone else have the same “guilts” or have any comments.??

      And no, I doubt very much “having the talk”


      Happy dressing (and washing when you can!)



      would be of any help

    • #723800

      Hello Caty, I had to do the hide laundry very secretly for a year or so before I came out to my wife. The good thing I had going was I did most of the laundry anyway but every now and then she would put a load in but never said anything.  After I came out to her is when she mentioned the fact of “ oh … now I know why you do the laundry, so you can wash all your femme things.”  Even now when others are around and I’m folding the laundry I often wonder if they ever notice absolutely no boxers and 2 piles of panties in the basket , wives and mine.

    • #723802

      I used to do exactly the same, but now my wife knows I underdress all the time and the kids have left home, no need to pretend with the laundry. It is so liberating to not to have to think about all the different ways of having to hid. I wish all the girls out there the same freedoms.

    • #723803

      Caty –

      I can relate to this.  I do most of the laundry, but when it comes to Suzanne’s things I do that seperately when my wife is out of the house.  There was one time we had a discussion and I mentioned doing the laundry combined and she didn’t agree to that.  I’m fine with that and just wait for the opportunity to do Suzanne’s laundry.  I do underdress when at home and have gone out underdressed in panties a few times but when I go out of the house I wear my boxer briefs.  I do that mostly because we have an agreement to keep my dressing in the house.  There have been a couple occasions where I have been wearing panties under my sweats and we were going to go out to the store, I said I was going to get changed and she said there was no need to slo out I went wearing panties.  I don’t know if she knew I was wearing them or not but it felt good doing it.


    • #723819

      I recently did a self imposed 24/7 panties only for over a month and realized I also needed to put some clean male underwear in the laundry for show. It amazes me how us Crossdressers face many of the same dilemma’s.

    • #723853

      My wife knows I underdress so everything goes into the hamper as normal for me. I guess I am lucky on that standpoint.



    • #723867

      I am lucky I wear panties every day. My wife knows and when she washes clothes she will wash Coleen’s clothes at the same time. I receive a voucher from Next, M&S, Dorothy Perkins or Roman for both my birthday and xmas where I can buy additions to my Fem wardrobe

    • #723872
      J J

      DADT assumes she knows you dress, but doesn’t want to be part of it. If so, just do your femme laundry and leave the clean socks and underwear in the drawer where they belong.

    • #723873

      I’m lucky that my wife knows and I do my own laundry washing drab and fem things. I only wash a few bras at a time because I hang them up to dry and I don’t want the wife seeing how many I own. She has no idea I own 70 plus bras… lol… and I need more!

    • #724212

      Hi Cathy
      I can completely relate to this. As I mentioned in relation to your previous thread I am still totally still in the closet at home but regularly underdress with at least panties so I am very familiar with putting a pair of man briefs in the wash every day even though I may not have worn any that day although I normally try and wear them for a small part of the day to avoid them looking too straight out of the drawer.
      What I have done is to switch my men’s briefs to a set of assorted brightly coloured ones so that an accidental flash of colour will not create a ” femme under dressing alert “.

    • #724278

      Certainly a challenge;
      I wear panties (and today tights) and some form of femme undershirt/camisole. Women’s jeans (every day) hose or women’s socks, and some form of androgynous looking women’s shoes. Wife sees what’s on the outside and knows it.

      At night however I’ll change (late in the day) and put on a pair of men’s underwear. Although some of those are silky bikini style. Those go in the laundry, the rest (except for my jeans) go in my “private laundry” that I manage to get done.

      My SO is also a workaholic. Once she is at her desk and working (evenings, weekends, etc)., she’s near oblivious to what is going on around her. It’s a shame at times, but it also allows me to get “my” laundry done.


    • #725201

      Caty, I do know the feeling. Even though I have a DADT relationship with the SO, I wash my own. Woolite in the bathroom sink, then air dry them out of sight. Recently our washer dryer died after 25+ years of service and couldn’t be repaired. So we bought a new set, unfortunately it has Wi-Fi and she knows when even it’s in use. If I use it, her phone gets a notification! So washing my undies and other items are done on the QT in the bathroom sink, just like being back in the 1960’s!
      I do tend to underdress on most days. When I change for bed at night I remove my panties and replace then with boring male briefs. (I wear nylon basketball shorts to sleep in). In the morning I change back to my panties once again. I also tend to wear long shirts, which help to cover the back side. 90% of my panties are high waisted and black micro fiber as are most of my briefs, so it’s hard to tell unless she gets a good view of the material it self.

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