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Registered On: August 27, 2017Topics: 133Replies: 1267Has thanked: 11 timesBeen thanked: 5459 timesHi ladies
I’ve always been quite jealous of any CDH member who has a supportive SO and does not have to “hide” anything to do with their femme lives and self. But in doing so, I also wish them the very best of luck and may it always stay that way.
But if some of us (and I dare say the majority), are in relationships where its either “firmly in the closet and she does not know”, or “knows but DADT”, our CD lives are a lot more complicated.
This is especially true when it comes to maintaining our cd lifestyle, with being able to do our femme washing, ironing and storage in secret as just about the “numero uno” in this field. Not to mention some of the other aspects which I’ll cover below.
This came home to me yesterday. “me darlin” was out almost all day, “ah ha” says Caty to herself a day or two earlier,.. Caty time.
But… It was a hot early autumn day here in Victoria and Caty not only needed to do some washing and ironing, but also the “old bod”, (chest and abdomen,) was in need of a shave and clean up. I also a/. have a long black nightie where the adjustable straps are not long enough and therefore with it on, I’m not being very “modest” in front. So I had to re attach the straps. (I would not claim to have “sewed” them…LOL …) Plus b/. My “go to” breast forms needed a wash.
So given the hot day and the “number of tasks” ahead of me, I knew by the time I’d got all the above sorted, it would be very close to my SO’s “home time” .(Dressing at home rule number 1. Think of the time she will be home and knock an hour off that for a “safety margin”)
Thus, in the end, with the exception of putting on a bra, plus panties and another set of (smaller) forms, I just could not be bothered..
I guess it’s common for women world wide not to wear much on hot days, but I just felt like a bloke in a t shirt and shorts, not very femme at all
Anyone else in the same situation? Any further comments???
Happy (when you can) dressing
Caty.
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Caty,
I’m completely in the closet, so washing can be quite awkward.
However, I am pretty lucky in that working at home alone I can put on an undies wash in the morning and can get them dry by the end of the day.
I do have to wait until I have a weekend to myself to wash larger stuff though.
My biggest problem usually is remembering to gather everything up before the SO arrives home. I’ve often found a stray pair of knickers sat on a radiator after I’ve already put things away.7 users thanked author for this post.
Registered On: August 19, 2021Topics: 22Replies: 277Has thanked: 2074 timesBeen thanked: 1471 timesHi Caty,
My relationship with my wife at this point is more of an “I know but don’t want to see it and don’t want it out of the house”. She knows I dress when I’m not expecting her to to be around and what she might see if she surprises me. I keep my things out of sight but not hidden. I am her caregiver so there aren’t a lot of opportunities to be alone and get some girl time in these days.
Hugs,
Michelle
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- Registered On: February 10, 2022Topics: 0Replies: 157Has thanked: 1941 timesBeen thanked: 676 times
Caty I know how you feel. I have always been in the closet, I was married for about 10 years or so and there was no way I could have told her, I would have never seen my girls again. It would have been more hell then being married to her. My dressing was mostly in the morning as I was always up early, and for a while I would deliver papers so would dress often when I did the papers. I did most of the laundry so I could wash my clothes and get them out and back into hiding. Now I live alone and dress all the time just have to make sure I don’t have anything out when my daughters come to visit. You that have a supportive SO, you are so lucky.
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- Registered On: November 3, 2019Topics: 10Replies: 181Has thanked: 602 timesBeen thanked: 706 times
Hi Cathy
Fully understand as I don’t even have the benefit of a DADT arrangement. Being fully in the closet at home the only opportunity to wash any items is when my wife goes to stay with our daughter. As I manage to enjoy a certain amount of underdressing and also dress femme for about 8 meetings a year in London I do get a build up of items needing washing which can only happen when I am home alone and therefore a high priority when I get a rare home alone time. I therefore have a very large collection of panties and more bras and Camis than are strictly necessary. The washing line looks very different to usual the first couple of days of a home alone time particularly as Rachel’s undies are a noticeably smaller size than my wife’s ( Size 14 bikini or thong compared to Size 22 full brief )
RachelSorry Caty
Did not notice the changing of your name by the autocorrect
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- Registered On: November 3, 2019Topics: 10Replies: 181Has thanked: 602 timesBeen thanked: 706 times
Hi Cathy
Fully understand as I don’t even have the benefit of a DADT arrangement. Being fully in the closet at home the only opportunity to wash any items is when my wife goes to stay with our daughter. As I manage to enjoy a certain amount of underdressing and also dress femme for about 8 meetings a year in London I do get a build up of items needing washing which can only happen when I am home alone and therefore a high priority when I get a rare home alone time. I therefore have a very large collection of panties and more bras and Camis than are strictly necessary. The washing line looks very different to usual the first couple of days of a home alone time particularly as Rachel’s undies are a noticeably smaller size than my wife’s ( Size 14 bikini or thong compared to Size 22 full brief )
Rachel3 users thanked author for this post.
Caty, I do feel for you and the other ladies out there having to live the same way. I am lucky to have a some what of a supportive wife, so I do have a little more freedom. I never put much thought into it when it comes to laundry, I do my own and she does hers. About 40 I was doing our laundry together, when I mixed the whites with something red, and for some reason she’s not as fond of pink as I am, and since then, she does hers and I do mine. I’ve always under dressed, and when I get home from work I change into a sheer cami under an unbuttoned shirt but I don’t go any farther than that. We still talk about my being able to dress more in full and of course I’m hoping that will happen some day sooner than later. But it just goes to show just how strong the feeling is in us, for us to want to present this way, that some of us in a close relationship are willing to live in a closet with the door tightly closed. I’m wishing all of you in that closet that Your SO will open it for you someday, even if it’s only a crack, just enough to let the light shine in.
Wishing you all the best
XOXO Sherri
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- Registered On: November 26, 2017Topics: 18Replies: 241Has thanked: 614 timesBeen thanked: 1202 times
I could have written what you wrote, Caty. Sounds like my story. Up until about a year ago, my wife was somewhat begrudgingly accepting. Now, in her words, from yesterday, she wants to “bury” me. She doesn’t want to see me or think about me. She only wants her husband.
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Caty,
I am blessed also that I have a supporting SO that allows me to dress when I would like. Unfortunately for me life usually keeps me from being full Syndee most of the time. I understand the bloke in a t-shirt and shorts as that is me most everyday. I am required to present as male daily due to my job and not being fully out in the open about who I am. I will come home at the end of the day, change out of my work clothes and usually put on legging and a shirt, bra and forms and just lounge around the house. I sometimes get to do my makeup and wig on the weekends but it is maybe once a month. So most of the time I am just a bloke in leggings and a shirt with a bra and forms in.
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- Registered On: November 30, 2019Topics: 28Replies: 4530Has thanked: 65995 timesBeen thanked: 16263 times
Hi Caty never would i brag about having a very supportive wife but it is nice to be able to dress anytime and i feel for all you girls that are in the closet or in a DADT scenerao at home hugs to you all ..💋💖💖
Stephanie
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- Registered On: July 20, 2020Topics: 7Replies: 570Has thanked: 7701 timesBeen thanked: 2866 times
I’m up several hours before my SO is. It gives me the time I need to take care of things. Fortunately for me I dont need more than 5 or 6 hours of sleep.
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I do the same, even with a more supportive relationship. Some time to yourself is always welcome, especially if there is no pressure.
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- Registered On: January 8, 2020Topics: 6Replies: 466Has thanked: 1956 timesBeen thanked: 2026 times
Roberta –
Same for me- early mornings are Suzanne time – it is nice having that time and is also when I’m here to be able to check the forums and spend time in chat.
XOXO
Suzanne8 users thanked author for this post.
- Registered On: October 13, 2015Topics: 6Replies: 828Has thanked: 3701 timesBeen thanked: 2591 times
Hi Caty, my Transnats sister (for which I am grateful to be with you lovely ladies) I too am a CD with my wife processing my revelation… our compromise is “DADT” and Leonara presents her feminine self when Kathy is not home.. which is 2x a week…. Leonara has a 3 hour window to transform to her feminine self … to take the time to decide “dress to the nines” or be informal skirt or skinny pants and of course intimates and breast forms..practice makes permanent for makeup application for the feminine persona. ( my experience from a professional makeover is only PERFECT lol) like you Caty, it also affords me the opportunity to wash my intimates and any of my washable clothes Caty I admire your dedication to ironing.. It takes me half hour to return to handsome man mode, although disappointing, is important to be with a a wife of 52 years.. thanks for listening and to you Caty to share my “DADT… warmest regards and hugs Leonara
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