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Had a very rare opportunity to fully dress — shaved and all — on Monday with my wife out of town. Even added a silhouette pic to my public profile.
And it got be to thinking about all the ways that cross dressing improves or can improve my health. Trying to list them here, because it may be a relevant and decent argument when discussing with your wife/SO. I think women live on average 5 years longer than men, so perhaps we can tap into that magic a bit. Also, if your wife is like mine, women are always trying to get their men to go to the doctor more and do more things to take care of ourselves — especially as we get older. And if you’re like me, we tend to resist that.
But then … cross dressing …
Physical.
Posture — I tend to slouch sometimes as a guy. Then I see myself in the mirror or watch myself walking as a girl, and my shoulders snap back, and as they say on the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, “tits out.”
Skin care — In guy mode, I pay no attention. In girl mode, I stress about dry flaky skin, moles and imperfections, etc. It motivates me to use products to improve my skin health and also maybe to see the doctor about irregularities or changes in moles and such.
Blood pressure — I’m sure everyone has a stressful job and life. That contributes to high blood pressure. Dressing reduces stress, and therefore… lower blood pressure.
Weight loss — don’t think about my dad bod gut too much until I get the opportunity to dress. Every girl wants to fit in a smaller dress size. I get motivated to lose weight when I have some heads up about when I might get to dress next. Now I understand the obsession with losing weight, diet and exercise to fit in the optimally sized wedding gown!
Diet — Related to the above. I eat better when I’m dressing. More salads! Lol. Fewer snacks and soft drinks. Because I’m thinking about my weight.
Exercise — Also related to the above. Cardio health, muscle tone, etc. I do less weight lifting and more cardio and toning work.
Mental/Emotional.
Calm and relaxation — the minute the panties, bra, and skirt go on, I feel the calm wash over me.
Stress relief — tough day? Wound up? Play with makeup, nail polish, and hair brushing and feel the stress leave your body.
Temporary resolution of dysphoria. Leads to fewer therapy bills (warning: savings perhaps offset by cost of new 👗 and 👠)
Better more understanding relationship with SO. Greater intimacy breeds greater closeness. Completely changes the dynamics, makes you closer, and improves mental outlook.
Anger management. Who can be angry when they twirl and see their skirt billow out around them?
Spiritual
Most of you know I’m a Christian. My worship experience changes dramatically when I’m dressed as Stephanie. I feel His presence emotionally with far greater impact, which bolsters my faith.
So what am I missing? Chime in!
I think you covered it very well, Stephanie. To “Stress relief” I would add “stress prevention”;things which would send my guy self into Hulk mode just roll off Bettylou’s back. My wife even said last week how “mellow” my attitude had become.
Bettylou
I think you have summarized it very well, and I agree with it all. I am quite health conscious, and as a couple we are kind of counter culture, as it’s Me trying to get HER to go the doctor! I try hard to keep my weight down, and fitting into clothes is a big motivator!
To that end I’m on a fairly low carb diet, and one day at a restaurant we often frequent, the waitress who is a friendly and funny lady made a comment to me, “so you’re trying to keep your girlish figure”, when I substituted veggies for potatoes. If only she knew that really is the reason!
Amy
Great post Stephanie
This is so true for me in alot of ways. Stopped drinking beer am losing weight and looking after my skin so much now where as i never did. Definately happier since accepting myself and trying to eat healthier but am eating less thats for sure.
Now just got to kick the ciggies lol
Hugs Rachel xo
Have you tried vaping?
There’s a ton of misinformation about it, but the facts is that it’s much safer than tobacco.
Love Laura
After smoking for 49 years, Vaping is how I finally managed to quit smoking, Laura, I know what they all say about it, But I feel better, and tried for over 10 years unsuccessfully, so I am all in on it
Hugs, Regi👩💕Good for you, Regi
All the misinformation I’ve seen can be traced back to the American tobacco industry (and this isn’t heresay, the evidence is everywhere) – vape isn’t a tobacco product, which is surprising to many, as the nicotine is extracted mainly from tomatoes.
Oh… mansplaining again…
Love Laura
Stephie!!! 🌸🧚🏼 You go girl!! Stunning!!!
❤️🦋🎀
Stephanie, I am so glad for your post! I’m just in my beginning phase of my journey, and I feel so motivated about everything about becoming who I’m really excited to be. Almost obsessed, lol. So, since yesterday, I ate better (no snacks, protein shake, NO BEER!). I also went on YouTube and followed along with a workout video for my butt, and today I did one for my abs. Never wanted to do that before. I’m also watching video’s about doing my eyebrows and lips. And, I just ordered an at home IPL Laser Hair Removal device. I just hope I don’t burn out or get overwhelmed and pull a fade. That’s happened before with other things in my life.
Stephanie, Sweetheart!
I’m so happy for you to have an opportunity to let your inner self out if only for a day! I’m thinking these moments are rare for you and have become a very spiritual time for you above all else!
Emotionally, transitioning has been a wonderful time in my internal life. As a Roman Catholic I give my thanks to Mary our Mother for all of her feminine virtues that effect my life so profoundly. In the moments of most feminine… I give thanks that I’ve been transported!
Love Polly ❤️
Polly,
I worshipped privately at home — read Hosea 1-3 and prayed — all completely en femme. I’ve done it before several times too. It’s transformative. I BAWLED. It was absurd! I don’t even know why. But the level of emotional intimacy for me with God skyrockets when I’m dressed and fully accessing my Steph side. I can’t tell you how much it improves my emotional orientation to Him and how wonderful it is to relinquish stubborn masculine pride and just … submit to Him. I even wore an Easter hat with a pretty ribbon that kinda matched my outfit — gotta take what you can get! 😂
BUT, now the genie is stuffed back down into the bottle for awhile…
God bless,
Steph
Sometimes finding motivation to stay active can be a problem for me, even though I know it makes me feel better. Two things about my CDing help give me a little extra push when I’m thinking of skipping a workout: one is that I still feel the need to begin my girl time by squeezing myself into some kind of shape wear or waist cincher. I’d just love to not have to deal with those! The other is that I already love how my legs look in tights or leggings, and I know as long as I don’t skip leg day, they can only get better!
I couldn’t agree more.
I eat healthy and exercise to make sure I can, and continue, to fit into my party frock. Before being the real me, I ate when and what I wanted, after all, a baggy t-shirt and jeans can hide a multitude of Sins. Bodycon dresses are a lot less forgiving.
As for my mental health, I’m sad to say that I’ve not been able to have any Didi time over the last couple of weeks and I can recognise that my mood is spiralling downward day by day. I’m getting snappy and withdrawing from loved ones, the once enjoyed exercise is becoming a chore and I feel like I’m getting closer to an explosion as the days creep on. I can both see and feel it, but am powerless to stop it.
C’mon Didi, I need you to rescue me.
Didi💋
Beautifully written Stephanie. I could not have explained it any better.
Requal is the the stress releaser in me. Since a health scare, Requal has been my support.
Unfortuately, for personal reasons, Requal is not present as much as she would enjoy, however when she does appear she is a totally different person.
Because of Requal, I now take very good care of my health and fitness and live a very healthy and fit life, so Requal can fit into her clothes and enjoy the feminine things of life.
The other side of this coin is that it is not CDing that causes the stress, but current attitudes to it.
It’s an important distinction to make. To put the “blame” where it really belongs.
CDing provides relaxation directly.
It’s the suppression of the desire, and the perceived requirements for hiding it that cause the suffering, anxiety, depression, etc., not CDing itself.
I remember it well – and am still feeling the consequences of continued suppression (anger, resentment, constantly looking forward to the next time, distracting me from the now), although I am entirely free of the horrendous anxiety attached to feeling like I need to hide it.
Now that latter part has gone, I realise just how damaging it is. It really is for the best to come out, if you are not going to stop.
Love Laura
Stephanie,
100% agree. That’s me. My inability to dress so far exceeds my opportunity that it can be, on balance, FAR more destructive to my health. Indeed, I feel the VERY keen difference between my stress levels when I do finally get to dress. It’s like a giant weight being lifted off of my shoulders (which suggests that the vast majority of the time, the weight is there).
So I guess the reason I posted what I did was to get people to think about it comprehensively in a manner that might be helpful to them as an explanation for sharing their secret with someone they love. It might be beneficial to gaining tolerance, if not acceptance (or raising a level of acceptance they haven’t yet achieved).
God bless,
Steph
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