- January 5, 2022 at 10:50 am #603915Erika PilkingtonParticipantRegistered On: January 3, 2022Topics: 2Replies: 2Has thanked: 27 timesBeen thanked: 46 times
Hi my name is Erika and I’m returning after a major purge. I have tried to stuff myself away and hide yet again to return. I struggle with my own acceptance like many of you out there and I am just looking for support.
- January 6, 2022 at 3:22 pm #604316Rhonda LeeBaroness - AnnualRegistered On: September 29, 2021Topics: 2Replies: 115Has thanked: 133 timesBeen thanked: 550 times
I’d bet the great majority of crossdressers have purged at least once. If we took a poll, my bet would be that at least 80% of us have purged, only to discover that does not stop the urges from returning and rebuilding. There is the constant conflict between accepting who we are and who we and others believe we should be in order to be acceptable. Hopefully we can all reach a level where we accept ourselves for who we are. That’s the biggest hurdle. If we can’t accept ourselves, it is tough to accept others.
Secondarily, in my mind, is deciding whether to act in a way that causes us to be more acceptable to others, even if doing so defies our own desires. That is especially difficult if the others include those who are our loved ones… our spouses in particular. Emerson, Shakespeare, and others have said it best: “To thine own self be true, for then thou cannot be false to any man.” Search for and hold onto your truth, whatever you do.
Sometimes we have to make personal sacrifices for those we love. Usually, however, a loving relationship is based on honest communication and desire of both parties to please the other. Compromises and boundaries are usually achievable in loving relationships. It takes a lot of effort and does not always play out well.
I hope you can hold onto the person you know yourself to be while navigating the difficulties that can create in relationships. Most have learned that purging is not a long-term solution, although it DOES allow us to shop again and rebuild our wardrobes… not all bad! I hope you find a way to be who you are, without regret, and this turns into a win/win situation!!
1 user thanked author for this post.
- January 6, 2022 at 11:55 am #604268Michelle McQueenLadyRegistered On: June 14, 2021Topics: 28Replies: 1532Has thanked: 10069 timesBeen thanked: 7543 times
- January 6, 2022 at 11:52 am #604267AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
You might need a bit a professional advice and to open up to that trusted person, just to get through that. The release of issues is something I did when younger, I built up stuff that caused me to need counselling due to panic attacks and breakdowns. There might be stuff in your thinking that is not helping you to self accept. You can work up to THE issue with them. And we can all advise you of course.
- January 6, 2022 at 10:47 am #604255
- January 6, 2022 at 10:02 am #604242BrielleDuchessRegistered On: August 14, 2021Topics: 6Replies: 487Has thanked: 2444 timesBeen thanked: 2053 times
Hi Erika, I too purged several times over the years. At the start of 2021 I bought all the things I wanted to begin dressing en femme again. But this time something different was going on inside me. I knew I couldn’t purge again, wanted to remove most of my body hair, and start to allow my femme side to breathe free.
It is a shame that we can’t be free to live as we think is best for us. I hate that society and religion force us into a box of our own making that never lets in the light of love and acceptance. Erika, you have all that and more here in this sisterhood! Keep the faith and be brave!
- January 6, 2022 at 9:53 am #604238
- January 6, 2022 at 6:54 am #604172AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
- January 6, 2022 at 6:35 am #604169AnonymousTopics: 0Replies: 0Has thanked: 0 timesBeen thanked: 0 times
- January 6, 2022 at 6:05 am #604159Joanna JacklinLadyRegistered On: September 4, 2021Topics: 1Replies: 29Has thanked: 22 timesBeen thanked: 117 times
Can only identify with what you shared..Itcis ridiculous really that we have to put ourselves through these tortuous cycles. One day the world will be less complex and more accepting of our identities. I already see growing signs but many of us are trapped in situations that force our hands. Always good to talk and share and be in solidarity with one another
- January 5, 2022 at 7:39 pm #604062Stephanie BassHostessRegistered On: November 30, 2019Topics: 25Replies: 3956Has thanked: 56525 timesBeen thanked: 14018 times
Hi Erika nice meeting you and so happy you found and joined us girls here on the best CD site on the internet so get settled in relax and enjoy yourself here.. As a new sister and family member you are welcome with open arms into our home as well as yours now also .. So as reading thru you have been welcomed from many ladies that i cant add to there welcome so i will say please join in the forums and posts ask many questions and chat with many ladies here there is a wealth of knowledge here to learn from good luck..
Hugs Stephanie Bass
- January 5, 2022 at 6:35 pm #604047SylviaLadyRegistered On: October 10, 2021Topics: 1Replies: 667Has thanked: 16894 timesBeen thanked: 2759 times
Dear Erika ,
Welcome back Sister !
I hope you don’t purge again.
Please accept Erika in your Life ,
She is a wonderful part of you , and we all want to
get to know her better !
I hope you will enjoy yourself here Erika ,
See you on the Forums ,
- January 5, 2022 at 3:33 pm #604008
- January 5, 2022 at 1:04 pm #603959Terri AnneAmbassadorRegistered On: February 7, 2018Topics: 32Replies: 1287Has thanked: 1908 timesBeen thanked: 2788 times
Welcome Back Erika,
So glad you have returned to us here. Feel free to explore to your heart’s content.
The warmth and hospitality of our community is just awesome and certainly welcoming.
Please do make use of the forums and articles or public chat room and friendships offered here on our site.
At any Membership level, You can contact any of us via [ PM ] Private Messages. You can find the link on each member’s Profile page.
Also, you may find what you need such as Help Center or Ambassadors by using the links in the top R/H drop down 3 bar [ hamburger ] menu.
Here is a good link to review the membership levels and the privledges for each.
Terri Anne, Ambassador
========== Membership Levels ============
- January 5, 2022 at 12:47 pm #603951
- January 5, 2022 at 12:28 pm #603945Jennifer SullivanLadyRegistered On: December 31, 2021Topics: 0Replies: 122Has thanked: 188 timesBeen thanked: 415 times
- January 5, 2022 at 12:23 pm #603943Paulette ParfoisDuchessRegistered On: November 17, 2021Topics: 2Replies: 574Has thanked: 1934 timesBeen thanked: 2207 times
Hi Erika, I know where you are coming from. I crossdressed as a young man, then tried to deny my desire for almost fifty years. Now I am back with even more passion as Paulette. What really helped is the acceptance I have gotten from my wife, family and friends. The big turning point was when I realized I didn’t really care what others thought, then good things began to happen! I certainly can understand your challenges being as tall as you are, but don’t forget there are many CIS ladies just as tall. I have two good friends who are as tall as you and frankly they are stunning! Welcome back to the sisterhood! Hugs, Paulette
- January 5, 2022 at 11:15 am #603923Tara RyanLadyRegistered On: April 20, 2021Topics: 4Replies: 525Has thanked: 1788 timesBeen thanked: 1961 times
- January 5, 2022 at 10:56 am #603919Krista WritemeLadyRegistered On: August 22, 2019Topics: 3Replies: 39Has thanked: 226 timesBeen thanked: 165 times
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.