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Hello, I am Evan. I am terrified!
I am sure my back store is similar too most, first time 12, sisters clothes…. For many years I wrote it off as a silly kink, nothing to worry about or explore further…. After marriage and 3 kids I quit completely as fear of discovery by my children was to painful of a prospect. My marriage and sex life have suffered in the laps.
Recently exploring things I began watching some YouTube videos of transgender women and kept coming back for more…. Recently broke down in tears relieving I had more in common with them than I had ever expected. I am at a crossroads and have flung open the doors, this is my first step as I don’t know where to begin, but I want to explore makeup, friends and an open place to see if I could go this far…
Did I mention I am terrified!!!
Hi Evan. I’m Mona. I didn’t have earlier experiences like you. I came to CD very recent and late in life, but I do understand the terrified part. No one outside of this site, who really knows me knows of my desire to dress and be a woman. I would be mortified if family and friends discovered my secret. But the great thing is, you have come to a community of gals who are ready to embrace, love, encourage, and support you. This is great place to be vulnerable and share experiences, both the scary ones and the joyful ones!
I’m looking forward to hearing more of your story and getting to know you better.
– Mona 💜
Hello Evan, a usual word for our community. Terrified of being detected what will people say, and for family its a difficult issue. Sometimes you hear oh we always knew.
Do what you need too.
Take little steps first.honesty from your heart.
Allow family the time to understand.
Perhaps wear some lingerie to bed, panties camisole.
Evan just be upfront. Good fortune.
JaneWelcome Evan,
Thank you for joining the group of fantastic ladies here. There are a lot of forums to read and a lot of friends to make. You are not alone. You will asking yourself a lot of questions, some will have answers and others maybe not. You have to look into yourself and say “What is right for me”, “What will make me feel like myself”. Sure others are involved, and you have to take that into consideration also. There are a lot of ladies here that have experienced these same questions and feelings. I suggest a lot of reading in the forums and you will see for yourself. I wish the best for you, and reach out if you need to talk to someone. There are a lot of ladies here that can help.
Chrissy
Hi, terrified of New Jersey,
I hope you are a little less worried now that you’ve seen the sort of responses to your post.
Just remember it’s not a race, it’s a personal adventure to better understand yourself and in doing so feel better about yourself. Don’t feel rushed, don’t take silly risks, and pace yourself. This is a great place to collect ideas and opinions and sometimes simple solutions to what you thought were problems by reading past forum threads and articles. Some will help, some will challenge, and quite possibly some will make you scratch your head and think “Eh?”.
When you’re ready just jump in and join the conversations. And if you have questions to ask, then fire away. You rarely get unanswered posts on here.
Marti xxx
Hi Evan,
Welocme to the best site for crossdressers on the Web! I wanted to ask if you have consulted with a gender therapist? They can help you identify what you really need for your quality of life. It may be just letting your wife know you want to express your feminine side privately or with her participation all the way to transitioning if that is what is revealed.Like you, I tried to fight it for decades and could keep things in check for a while – sometimes for several years. But a year ago, I realized I was hurting myself and my wife by living with the guilt and dysphoria. You won’t know if you don’t get information. We can’t diagnose ourselves since we are too close to it and can’t always interpret our feelings and thoughts about it correctly.
Please know this: crossdressing or transitioning ISN’T wrong! Hiding an important part of yourself from, and deceiving our loved ones (and ourselves) IS wrong. It took me 40 years of marriage before I finally decided to make that right, even if it ended our marriage. It’s been incredibly hard to regain trust, and transitioning has added more problems. But my wife amazed me by staying with me and trying to at least support my journey even if she can’t be with me as a wife traditionally is.
Sorry, didn’t mean to give such a long reply or give too much advice. I just went through all this in a way that kind of maximized the pain, and if I can help someone else choose better than I, then I have made the bad turn to good.
Enjoy your experience here and lean in to all the love and affirmation we have here!
Hugs,
Brie
Hello Evan,
Welcome to our amazing CrossDresserHeaven (CDH) site. So glad you have joined us here. Feel free to explore all that our site has to offer.
The Warmth, Compaasion and Hospitality of our community members can be found throughout the site.
Please do make use of the forums and articles or public chat room and friendships offered here on CrosDresser Heaven.
At any Membership level, You can contact any of us via [ PM ] Private Messages. You can find that link on each member’s Wall under their Profile picture.
Also, you may find what you need such as Help Center or Ambassadors by using the links in the top R/H drop down 3 bar [ hamburger ] menu.
Here is a good link to review the membership levels and the privledges for each. Such as Private Chat, Groups, etc.
https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/membership-account/membership-levels/
Regards,
Terri Anne, Ambassador
=========== Link to our public Chat room ==============
Hi Evan, and welcome. One thing I can tell you is you have no need to be apprehensive as a member of this group. It is a wonderful place to share our concerns and ask the kind of questions that might be difficult to ask in other situations. As you explore where your journey is taking you I know you can find friends here who have been through it before and can provide helpful suggestions. I look forward to following you in your adventures. Hugs, Paulette
Evan, your story sounds so much like mine. I would say you are, were I was about six months ago. That’s about the time I found CDH and finding out there are more girls out there like me has completely changed my outlook on my femininity. You are going to find a lot of support here. Welcome.
Hugs, Liara
Dear Evan
I know I am not alone when I read through your message and found myself nodding in recognition at pretty much everything you said: relationships, sex life. Who I feel I have things in common with and wondering where on earth this takes me apart from the strong desire to dress make up and be womanly. Lovely to meet you sister
Joanna xx
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