- August 9, 2020 at 1:15 pm #372400Kellie LouiseParticipantRegistered On: August 9, 2020Topics: 1Replies: 1Has thanked: 2 timesBeen thanked: 27 times
Hi everyone, hoping to find someone to talk to as cannot talk to family or friends.
Total of 21 users thanked author for this post. Here are last 20 listed.
- August 14, 2020 at 12:33 pm #374088
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- August 14, 2020 at 11:07 am #374058Teralynn LovingLadyRegistered On: October 17, 2019Topics: 2Replies: 1102Has thanked: 8735 timesBeen thanked: 2016 times
Hi Kellie, Teralynn again. Consider this my more detailed welcoming post. By now you have have received a lot of wonderful welcoming posts from our fantastic members! You might even be wondering why so many crossdressing people would reach out to help me when I am the wife of a crossdresser? The simple answer is crossdressers are people to! Many of us have experienced a lot of the feelings that you are having right now and we know how it can hurt! The best advice for support is to join the support group for significant others and Stephanie Flowers has already provided a link to the group. I strongly recommend you join them! As for why he won’t sit down and discuss his crossdressing with you, there could be several possible reasons but until you actually get him to sit down and discuss this honestly with you all the why’s will never be answered. I understand that you have children. They can pick up on negative energy in their home! They can sense when things are not well between mom & dad. As long as this situation exists, there is little you can do to shield them from their perceptions! Finally I believe you mentioned that your husband gets angry at times and confronting him about something he does not want to discuss with you might prove dangerous! Anything more than gentle persuasion might trigger a response that would extremely unfortunate. At the first sign that he is acting more like a caged animal with rabies rather than a rational husband willing to talk you will need to back away. I am sure the ladies in the support group will provide you with some excellent ideas also, but remember no one knows your situation better than you do. I am aware of a few more methods that could coax a spouse to talk about a delicate subject like their crossdressing, but I am not trying to write a book here, just welcome you to CDH and give you a few things to consider! If, after getting some ideas from the support group and trying them you still cannot get him to discuss things with you, send me a private message and type the word help in the subject line and I will be quick to respond. I do hope you get him to talk to you about this, because no one should have to live in a toxic relationship and this could quickly devolve into that! – Blessings from Teralynn
1 user thanked author for this post.
- August 13, 2020 at 1:05 pm #373792
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- August 10, 2020 at 7:17 am #372659Autumn ValiantDuchessRegistered On: July 14, 2019Topics: 34Replies: 1150Has thanked: 17426 timesBeen thanked: 3010 times
Welcome to CDH. Getting someone to open up can be extremely difficult. I’m glad you found CDH because there is so much support and information here for spouses. In general, you can talk to just about anyone here and we would all gladly lend you advice and support but I think that your best course of action is to follow the advice of Stephanie Flowers and get with the Wives and Significant Others group. I believe you will get the most help from those like yourself who have already gone through what you are currently going through. I am a closeted CD and if you want any advice from my personal point of view I am always willing to help, just send me a private message. I hope it all works out for you.
- August 10, 2020 at 1:04 am #372571
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- August 9, 2020 at 6:49 pm #372515Teralynn LovingLadyRegistered On: October 17, 2019Topics: 2Replies: 1102Has thanked: 8735 timesBeen thanked: 2016 times
Kellie, Teralynn here, Just a quick note to assure you that you have a made a wise choice in joining us since you are in serious need of people to talk to about your situation! I will send you a more detailed welcoming post later on when I have more time but for now I hope you have a lot of time to spend on the site because soon you will have all kinds of wonderful people to talk to and most will offer you a shoulder to cry on if you need one! More later. – Blessings from Teralynn
- August 9, 2020 at 4:35 pm #372480Sandy JaysonDuchessRegistered On: September 29, 2019Topics: 17Replies: 400Has thanked: 822 timesBeen thanked: 1741 times
Sorry to hear of your SO being the way he is. He is likely both very scared and maybe disgusted with himself at his desires which he likely doesn’t understand himself. All you can do is try to reassure him you love him and want to help in any way you can. Best of luck to the both of you!!!
- August 9, 2020 at 3:46 pm #372462Stephanie FlowersAmbassadorRegistered On: June 26, 2017Topics: 26Replies: 4820Has thanked: 8340 timesBeen thanked: 8363 times
Nice meeting you. Your a very special spouse and your partner is so fortunate. This is certainly the place you’ll find many of the answers you are seeking .There are certainly many happy stories about couples discovering this unique relationship but unfortunately many don’t.
This is certainly the place you’ll find many of the answers you are seeking. Only a short while ago that I opened up to my wife after 40 years of marriage. It was a huge surprise for her and certainly very emotional. We had many talks and through this agreements and guidelines were set and together were slowly working it out. But Cdh and it’s resources helped my wife and myself understand more about our individual troubles. There is a place where many GG gals like yourself could receive the help and support to get the answers your wanted to know.
A special group for you special gg ladies to I’m sure will help you ( wives & significant others )
where ladies like yourself can offer their help to questions only you would like to ask them. Our gg ambassador to the group will be very happy to enroll you there. .
There is a procedure to identify the person enrolling and may a little time.
Theses ladies are awesome and will support you in every way. No one is left out, that ‘s what makes this such a wonderful place to belong. Best to you and hope to hear from you soon. As an ambassador and a cder, if you need anything please be free to PM me, I may not be able to answer your most personal questions but possibly give some hindsights to what your spouse is going through. The best to you both on this journey ahead…
Stephanie 🌹 🌹
- August 9, 2020 at 3:18 pm #372456Bianca EverdeneLadyRegistered On: April 11, 2017Topics: 22Replies: 720Has thanked: 2764 timesBeen thanked: 2765 times
Welcome to the site. Hope you have fun exploring. A great place to share things you may not be able to with family or friends.
- August 9, 2020 at 2:40 pm #372435Jenny JonesLadyRegistered On: November 5, 2019Topics: 1Replies: 128Has thanked: 114 timesBeen thanked: 477 times
Hello, Kellie, the people on here are super friendly, I am sure you’ll find several people who would love to listen. Everyone opens up at it at their own time, I don’t know your husband, but just letting him take his time and you being there for him will probably go a long way. There’s no magic wand solution unfortunately, some people struggle with this side of themselves for years and having someone kind and understanding is such a shock to their system they don’t process it well, expecting a trick or a joke or the other shoe to fall.
Best advice is to treat it like every other interaction with someone you love, sit down with them, let them know you are here for them, and let them handle the rest.
If you need an opening, I’ve heard several people suggest things like pick out a movie with a crossdressing character or try and tie another one of your shared hobbies into it, so it’s not just about him dressing. Take it easy, slowly and give them time.
- August 9, 2020 at 2:21 pm #372423
- August 9, 2020 at 2:05 pm #372418Kellie LouiseLadyRegistered On: August 9, 2020Topics: 1Replies: 1Has thanked: 2 timesBeen thanked: 27 times
So many questions….
My husband is a secret cross dresser, I have tried everything to get him to talk to me for years now. He still hides the majority of the time.
He is away at the mo with work so I messaged and asked if I can wash the contents of his chest of drawers and he agreed.. he has so many ladies underwear items and dresses and some random outfits.
I just want him to be honest with me and happy, he is generally a very angry person and I wondered if this was fuelling it?
How can I get him to talk to me???
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