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Hi Dawn , and thank you for joining CDH!
🎀🧚♀️
Eish! Dawn…
Its a tough one!I am in Sally’s position 3 months down the line.
It has been up and down…
I hope you can get support maybe from the “spouse page” on this site.
The fact that you reaching out is good and a step in the right direction… yes this is true!
Sally is at her most vulnerable now and words do hurt – from both sides – both of you must try not to say the wrong thing and more importantly, not to do the wrong thing!
You are possibly hurting and confused, give it time…
Unfortunately everyone has secrets and it depends how big this one is for you – it is a personal thing… and I am not a therapist but open talk works – it really does!! Yet it can easily get derailed, tread carefully…
Just 25 years ago on my side of the world, I would haved been jailed for being me, if found – still is a fact in most of Africa! In the UK it was the same up to the late 60’s or early 70’s if memory serves correctly!
Yet women and child abuse gets a slap on the wrist… this is a secret that must not be kept!
Other secrets are theft, corruption, drug abuse… the list is endless but some how society can accept this when it comes out – why!!???
Some of the best socialites are really bad people – serial killers come to mind as I was watching the “Yorkshire Ripper”… on Netflix…
So… explore the background, look for reasons and that hopefully will lead to acceptance.
I do not know you or Sally but will tend to believe she is none of the above!!!
We tend to be very nice people… understanding and non-judgemental – often suppressing our secret makes us grumpy and difficult to live with… once we are “outed” that changes (my experience, my SO says she prefers talking to Roxanne!!)
Set boundaries but not conditions as that becomes prescriptive!!
Effectively in my ramble I am also trying to help myself!!
There are mature solutions and running away, separating and ridicule are not in any way mature!
I hope this gives you food for thought but ultimately it is personal and only the two of you can sort it – I believe it can be sorted!!!
Hugs Roxie.
Hi Dawn, welcome to the CDH family. I don’t want to repeat Roxi but what she says is very true. Sally is probably as scared right now as you are shocked. One thing that I’ve learned whilst on the site is gender and sexuality are two separate things.
It’s amazing to have you here honey. Please feel free to ask any questions you feel you need to and as Roxi mentioned there is a SO’s section that is private for the general populace.
Love Trish
Hi Dawn nice to meet you and so happy you joined us here as the wife and supportive half of a family thank you for joining us .. I met Sally and said to her to please give you a hug as wifes that support are a jem and thats the truth .. You both must sit and talk and more listen to each other set some boundries for Sally and for you also as you both are new to this so please take your time and enjoy the fun of it as girlfriends do dont mean any of the sex just be friends and enjoy life as such .. Again nice to meet you ..
Stephanie Bass
Hi Dawn, welcome to CDH, I would just like to say that I admire you for having the courage to face this new facet of your and Sallys life and wish you both happiness in this journey you are undertaking.
All of the members of CDH are with you and will be delighted to help in anyway we can – all you need to do is ask.
Big hugs
Diana.
Hi Dawn from the UK, from another Dawn from the UK !
Lovely to see you here and Sally is a very lucky person to have someone like you supporting her.
Its not easy being a partner of some one who is TG/CD and I am humbled by those who do.
As has been mentioned there is a special area for partners and SO’s to have mutual support away from the main forum and its only accessible by them (I’m an administrator and have no access to this area either .. so its very private) – so please send a private message to Kayla C to get access.
Wives and Significant Others – This is a private group and forum only for SOs. It is a safe space to share any concerns or frustrations and get advice from other women who are in a similar situation.
I’m much further south than you in the UK , but am always here if you have any questions or comments to make.
hugs
Dawn
Hi Dawn and welcome from another supportive wife in the UK.
Have you joined the Wives & SOs group yet? There are quite a few of us on there with all different experiences and are there for a shoulder to cry on (about anything), for advice, to let of steam and feel we have a place to share the positives as well.
Mxx
Dawn
welcome, it’s wonderful to have you here with us and for you to be here together with your husband is very special indeed. Help and support here is for everyone, for your husband true understanding of what this all means. This this is certainly the place your spouse find many of the answers she is seeking. Look into our forums written by others who talk about their experiences, their questions they may ask with many offering help and advice so everyone can understand better on so many confusing topic . Many face this troubling ordeal but be asured there is support and help from everyone here . Relax, get comfortable and both of you enjoy being part of this wonderful community that really does care for all that passes through our doors. And to you lovely GG lady , a place to have your questions and concerns answered . It’s certainly a major issue in a lot of relationships. We all need a place to have others to talk with, to listen and show compassion and help better your own feelings as one continues to grow and discover more of this complicating course in life . There’s a group you may like to know ( wives & significant others ) where ladies like yourself can offer their help to questions only you would like to ask them.
https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/groups/wives-and-significant-others/
No body is left out, that ‘s what makes this such a wonderful place to belong. Best to the both of you and hope to hear from you soon. Hugs!!!
Stephanie 🌹Hi Dawn, welcome, and thank you for being there for Sally. I can only speak from personal experience, but Sally will most likely be in a worried state, she will not want to lose you, and will be conflicted to holding onto her identity whilst holding onto you. Communication is critical, to try and re-assure each other. Sally is still the same Person you care for, this is just a part of herself that she most likely has kept hidden for some time, but she does not want the secret between you.
I really hope you work together, stay strong for each other, and find out just how wonderful a person Sally is. A supportive partner probably is the holy grail for any crossdresser, I know it is for me. 😌Hi Dawn
Welcome and well done for supporting Sally! You have already received a large response from your post so it’s obvious you have come to the right place! You will find lots of support here and plenty of lovely people who are more than willing to chat with you, including me! You probably have a lot of questions and concerns, rest assured help is available so take your time, take a deep breath and either post a question or two on the forum, or PM one of the lovely people here if you prefer. I am always happy to chat about things so don’t hesitate to contact me if you want to…………..
Hello Dawn welcome to CDH any questions please don’t hesitate to ask, we are all very friendly here and love to chat and help.
Best Wishes Sarah from Buckinghamshire.
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