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This is a nice step. Trying to understand more about your husband. Knowledge is important. Communicating and trying not to let fear dictate our thoughts. I hope you two can find common ground. Thanks for stopping in.
Hi Sassy
Thank you on his (and our)behalf for at the very least, taking time to time to have interest in what he is experiencing. Welcome to a wonderful place where we can safely discuss with others our feelings and wishes without judgement, ridicule, or fear of unwanted or inappropriate replies.
Feel free to read some of the posts and ask questions if you like. There is an area designed expressly for signicant others, the moderators will see your post and likely provide you with the necessary invite for that group.
Sassy, welcome is so nice meeting you. Your a very special spouse and your partner is so fortunate for you looking into our site on understanding this confusing change that your facing in your relationship. This is certainly the place you’ll find many of the answers you are seeking. Only a short while ago that I opened up to my wife after 40 years of marriage. It was a huge surprise for her and certainly very emotional. The biggest concern was the mistrust I caused. Seeing her and the hurt that it caused was hard. We had many talks and through this agreements and guidelines were set and together were slowly working it out. But Cdh and it’s resources helped my wife and myself understand more about our individual troubles. I learned more about myself and as it has been mentioned from others we have a wonderful group we have here exclusive for spouses where many GG girls like yourself could receive the help and support to get the answers your wanted to know. This group – private ( wives and significant others ) . For you special ladies where Cders are not allowed. Meet with them and get the support you need. You will need to upgrade though. Look into other forms written by others who talk about their experiences, their questions they may ask with many offering help and advice so everyone can understand better on so many confusing topic . Many face this troubling ordeal but be assured you have support and help from everyone here . Relax, get comfortable and enjoy being part of this wonderful community that really does care for all that passes through our doors. The best to you both as you venture through these new paths together . Very happy meeting you and welcome.
Stephanie 🌹
Hi, Sassy
My wife isn’t overly enthusiastic about my dressing, but she’s actually reached a point where she’s purchased a few items of clothing for me – as well lotions, creams, and other personal items. As much as being “Shawna” is a continual learning process for me – it’s no doubt more so for her. I love my wife with all my heart and there’s no doubt that she loves me for who I am. I’m sure it’s the same for both of you. Best wishes and a big hug to you!
Shawna
Will you talk to my wife for me 🙂
Hello Sass,
I hadn’t CDed in public since I and a nextdoor neighbor genetic girl Karen znd I played with after school school shed dress Me up as girl and we”d have, “tea parties” one day her mom told her she had to get ready for ballet class, she refused to go unless I went also her mom had bought two set of liitle girls ballet togs for Karen and that we both were very similar size wise her mom and my mom thought I would look cute in pink ballet togs they told me my name would be Tammie 4 the class so k znd took ballet classes after school together 4 w years.
Then a number of years ago my SOGGF got BC and I had to move in with to be her primary care giver at home, until she was well enough to go bk2work, any how we decided to continue living 2gether for various reasons, 1 I got laid off from long term Federal Contractor positions during a contract renegotiation anyway when ever she was away on a several day business trip, I was wearing her outfits and her spare pair 3custom made best forms ,( she having had a radical double mastectomy,) a few years ago she 3days early came home found me wear and offit of hers.. and Was Extremely pissed of , as it was 3 weeks to Halloween and that her office was having a Halloween costume party after work, threatened to throw me out the house we shared unless one i let her make me up for dinner downtown that evening and i would have to Dress fully ENFEMM for the 3 weeks 24/7 I guess thinking it would be punishment for yet little did she forcefully forcing me to go out in public since Childhood would be something that I would enjoy, day after Halloween party, at breakfast she told me she was also having a good time anyway she suggested that we continue thru her office new years eve ” costume party dinner dance” Then New year’s day she woke earlier than I had this was having breakfast but I forgot about the holiday any how she usually picked out what she expected me to wear each day and laid them out on a bedroom chair, that morning no outfit on chair so I just pulled out from closet and nice skirt and spandex bodysuit I had worn several days before etc so got dressed up in it went downstairs to find soggf to get her to do my makeup, she was having a late breakfast, not seeing me as I walked in until I said good morning she turned and said good morning Tammie, I was hoping to see you as Tammie rather than Jammie but I decided to see I u would choose a ENFEMME outfit or a Jammie outfit… I was hoping you would pick a Tammie outfit by urself, so later today we are going shopping to get you some feminine attire of your own at a Soma INTIMATES store then to a nearby shopping center ladies wear store all having 3 special NewYears day sales
Cheers as the Brits say
I hope you are having a good time with ur other half.
Hi there Sassy, I’m a husband and someone who likes to crossdress.
Couple of quick things. Talking with a counselor can help out a ton for whatever you’re feeling in all of this. Highly recommended just while things settle down or get figured out. Thank you for posting here, I can only speak for myself when I say that I see a lot of love coming from an SO regarding one’s partner and understanding their cross dressing. Thank you. Keep an open mind.
Every cross dresser is different in their own way, though there are common threads. Cross dressing is a quality aside from sexuality, and in some cases aside from even gender itself. Some are trans women, dressing as the gender they feel, and some (like me) are men that simply like wearing women’s clothes. For me, I like to dress up in my own time and for myself in more comfortable floral dresses and leggings (I go for cute and comfy), however some men might like to live as women part or full-time, others might only under-dress with a bra and panties and may never want to wear anything other than underwear. Same goes for makeup, nails, wigs, forms, etc.
It’s okay not to know a lot, but do ask questions. Treat your husband gently though, even as a man this part of my own identity can be scary, so anything accusatory or harsh and I’ll be in my dress telling you I don’t like to tress. Typically cross dressers aren’t gay, but some certainly are. Some identify as straight and might want to ‘play’ with other men for purely physical reasons (not emotional or romantic). I’d ask your husband if he wants to transition. What types of closes he likes wearing, and when did he start. The “why” that so many people are after is a illusive and in some cases a red herring. That is, focus on what is known, work from there, but don’t worry about the “why” of it all so much.
Your husband probably is exactly who he is when you met him. It’s understandable to feel otherwise. At no point, if he’s told you, should he feel he has to hide it. Dishonesty and lack of communication is 100% the biggest wedge that drives partners apart. Work with him on YOUR terms too, not just his. Relationships are a two-way street. One of my wife’s rules – if I want a new dress I have to get rid of an old one first and tell her before I do. That’s a simple one, but she has rules and I love to cross dress.
Digest and think. As a closing note, for what it’s worth this is a very, very OLD tradition among men dating back thousands of years in almost any culture and society belonging to the human species. Lace and heels were first invented for men to wear, not women. Same with pants! Men have been wearing kilts and robes (skirts and dresses as we call them today) for thousands of years. Pink was traditionally a very masculine color. Just a few things to ponder.
Any rate, welcome, and ask any question you may have and you’ll get a plethora of honest answers. We’re here to help.
Ms Lily; I really appreciate what you were able to share in this post for Ms Sassy. I realize it was in response to her and her request for tangible input. But I found it a conformation to some of my own thoughts especially since I’ve been Dressing for less than a year at the age of 59, many of my own questions remain unanswered. Thank You 🍒
Hi sassy , your husband will thank (as do I any many in this group) for your interest in cross dressing , please give him time and try to talk to each other regularly. Everyone is different and will cope in a different way . I hope it all works out for both of you . ps wish my wife was as understanding .xxx
Hi I’m Katie please pm at katiewilsonmind@gmail.com if you want to chat xxx
hello Sassy , yes its nice that you know your s.o x dresses, its hard to tell some one that he x dresses. i have been x dressing for years and hiding it, now my wife found out and she is ok with it, i have my own collection of female attire and wife tell me when i can dress up for we have 1 adult child still at home. its a great feeling to let our feminine side out. we know what real woman go though when dressing up and how it feels to wear the dress and nylons and put on make up, feel free to read my profile and feel free to read up on some articles and groups, forums on this site to help you though and under stand you husband better
I hid my x-dressing from my wife for years and one day I decided to see a therapist about getting ‘fixed’. I couldn’t hide that from my wife so we had the talk. The one where I tell her I’m the same person I’ve always been, I’m not gay, I just enjoy wearing women’s clothes. I’d found several informative Internet sites we read together and had a long talk. I suspect she already knew most of this and had been waiting on me to tell her in my own time. She assured me she didn’t care if I wore women’s clothes as long as I was discrete and didn’t me to stop doing something that I obviously enjoy.
Over the years my wife has surprised Elizabeth by buying her bras, high heels, panties, dresses, skits and blouses. See has helped her with her makeup and polished her nails. She admits she enjoys watching Elizabeth as she explores and expresses her femininity however she’s not fond of the my femme deplume, Elizabeth, so it’s a treat when she refers to me as Elizabeth.
Elizabeth
Hello Sassy.
I hope you two have been able to keep the communication flowing, and if you joined the wives and SOs group you have been able to get somebody to talk to who has been through similar experiences.
On the CD side, as you can tell, there are bunches eager to help if we can. Even though many wives/SOs may feel like they already know one CD too many! 😆
Good luck!
Gaby
Hello, Sassy. Welcome to CDH.
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