- May 16, 2022 at 10:05 am #645646Saleena AndrewsParticipantRegistered On: May 14, 2022Topics: 4Replies: 24Has thanked: 47 timesBeen thanked: 86 times
Hi all – My name is Saleena.
I am married to a wonderful woman. However, recently, I came out to her as a crossdresser. Needless to say, we are now going through a difficult period. She has made it clear that she wants to find a way to move forward. She is ok with me crossdressing but doesn’t want to know about it – as long as I tell her when i plan to do it.
she’s also made it clear that I can’t post pictures. However, as you all know, posting pictures is a validation for us.
Any advice on navigating the difficult times?
Total of 26 users thanked author for this post. Here are last 20 listed.
- May 26, 2022 at 11:58 pm #648115Val’sheril StarsongLadyRegistered On: March 3, 2019Topics: 17Replies: 464Has thanked: 344 timesBeen thanked: 1171 times
I have mixed feelings as I’m sure you do about your SO’s response. On the one hand, that is a gift horse you do not want to look in the mouth, often a partner will just walk out once that sort of secret is revealed. On the other… well, she obviously wants Saleena at arms’ length, as well as some restrictions on your ability to express yourself online. If it were me I would do my best to honor her wishes even if you don’t understand them.
Either way know that you have a multitude of likeminded sisters here, many far wiser than myself, so if you find yourself in need of guidance, fashion advice, or even just casual conversation, don’t be afraid to raise your voice.
1 user thanked author for this post.
- May 27, 2022 at 5:35 am #648140Saleena AndrewsLadyRegistered On: May 14, 2022Topics: 4Replies: 24Has thanked: 47 timesBeen thanked: 86 times
Thank you for your advice. I agree, my situation could have been a lot worse. Still not out of the woods by a long shot. To make this work, we are setting boundaries and one of them is not posting pictures and I have to and will respect that.
- May 26, 2022 at 9:02 pm #648096
- May 23, 2022 at 8:21 am #647367Danielle MacGuffinLadyRegistered On: May 21, 2021Topics: 6Replies: 180Has thanked: 421 timesBeen thanked: 721 times
- May 23, 2022 at 7:14 am #647345
- May 17, 2022 at 8:14 pm #645984Jocelyn BeyoodyDuchessRegistered On: May 4, 2022Topics: 0Replies: 33Has thanked: 51 timesBeen thanked: 94 times
Saleena be careful. If she is anything like my wife. She is building her case. I was told, on numerous occasions, how supportive she is. Only to discover she has been going behind my back to a couple of family members and friends. I am being forced to come out to all. She treatens to share it with everyone. It has become very hostile. Spewing vitriol at me every conversation. So my advice to you, and it pains me to feel this way, do not disclose everything at once. Peace meal it. Be extra cautious.
- May 18, 2022 at 10:31 am #646068LadyRegistered On: May 14, 2022Topics: 4Replies: 24Has thanked: 47 timesBeen thanked: 86 times
Thanks, Jocelyn. Seems like you are in a very difficult place. I will take your advice and tread carefully. My wife and I are both navigating this slowly.
- May 19, 2022 at 7:41 am #646240Jocelyn BeyoodyDuchessRegistered On: May 4, 2022Topics: 0Replies: 33Has thanked: 51 timesBeen thanked: 94 times
I’m not trying to be a debbie downer. Sometimes, I’m so caught up in the emotional tornado, just in my own head, I forget my wife didn’t have a clue. I blindsided her with all this. I do have empathy for her when she remineseces of when we first met. I have to fib about certain times to keep her perception in tact. I hope there is a day we can talk openly. I have faith, afterall I do love her. I trusted her to share my darkest screte.
- May 17, 2022 at 12:36 pm #645897
- May 17, 2022 at 11:39 am #645885Terri Anne KnoanAmbassadorRegistered On: February 7, 2018Topics: 32Replies: 1218Has thanked: 1839 timesBeen thanked: 2694 times
Welcome to our amazing CrossDresserHeaven (CDH) site. So glad you have joined us here. Feel free to explore all that our site has to offer.
The Warmth, Compaasion and Hospitality of our community members can be found throughout the site.
Please do make use of the forums and articles or public chat room and friendships offered here on CrosDresser Heaven.
At any Membership level, You can contact any of us via [ PM ] Private Messages. You can find that link on each member’s Wall under their Profile picture.
Also, you may find what you need such as Help Center or Ambassadors by using the links in the top R/H drop down 3 bar [ hamburger ] menu.
Here is a good link to review the membership levels and the privledges for each. Such as Private Chat, Groups, etc.
Terri Anne, Ambassador
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- May 17, 2022 at 9:19 am #645851Liara WolfeDuchessRegistered On: August 14, 2021Topics: 3Replies: 1539Has thanked: 2985 timesBeen thanked: 5243 times
- May 17, 2022 at 9:22 am #645854
- May 17, 2022 at 4:07 am #645797Suzanne MartinHostessRegistered On: January 8, 2020Topics: 1Replies: 136Has thanked: 737 timesBeen thanked: 437 times
Welcome to CDH.
My wife knows of my dressing and doesn’t want to see me dressed, however, she is supportive in her own way. She has heled me shop online and with fittings on things I have gotten. I know it sounds a bit strange that she will do that when she doesn’t want to see me dressed but she says if I am going to dress I may as well look pretty. I think the doesn’t want to see me dressed means she doesn’t want to hang out watching TV with me dressed, makes sense to me, just wish it wasn’t so. Like you I can’t post pictures which is something I would like to do. Maybe someday.
Look forward to seeing you in chat.
Take care and as always stay pretty.
- May 16, 2022 at 10:31 pm #645780Paulette ParfoisDuchessRegistered On: November 17, 2021Topics: 2Replies: 400Has thanked: 1323 timesBeen thanked: 1405 times
Welcome Saleena! You have found a wonderful place to come to express your femininity. I know it has been great for me. I am happy to hear you have come out to your wife. I know a lot of girls who have not been able to do so, and many are tormented by it. I can also understand her reluctance to fully embrace Saleena. My wife initially had a difficult time with ‘too much’ Paulette, though now she buys her clothes and poses for photos with her. I am beginning to realize the best way to gain the acceptance of your spouse in in slow ‘baby steps’. At least that is what seems to be working for me. Take care. Hugs, Paulette
- May 17, 2022 at 9:18 am #645850LadyRegistered On: May 14, 2022Topics: 4Replies: 24Has thanked: 47 timesBeen thanked: 86 times
Thank you for the kind words. A world of weight has been lifted off my shoulders. However, in doing so, I have now burdened her with it. I have reminded her that what I am today is all because of her and her standing by me. Need to keep reminding her about how special she is to me.
- May 16, 2022 at 6:37 pm #645747Stephanie BassHostessRegistered On: November 30, 2019Topics: 22Replies: 3592Has thanked: 51824 timesBeen thanked: 12751 times
Hi seleena nice to meet you and so happy you found and joined us girls here so get settled in relax and enjoy your self here .. As a new sister and family member you are welcomed with open arms into our home as well as yours now also.. So sorry for wifes reluctance to support you Just dont fret girlfriend as keep the lines of comunifications open between you both .. Many girls here have supportive wifes as me included there since marrage back 39 years ago .. If it would help ?? we have a group here for wifes and significant others to help with questions she might have and can ask many gg ladies as her self that we have no access to just them if you think she might be intrested in this it could help.. Good luck girl and hope to see you around for a chat sometime..
- May 16, 2022 at 5:54 pm #645740Tracy SilkLadyRegistered On: December 13, 2020Topics: 2Replies: 22Has thanked: 41 timesBeen thanked: 63 times
- May 16, 2022 at 4:36 pm #645724
- May 16, 2022 at 2:30 pm #645700Stephanie FlowersAmbassadorRegistered On: June 26, 2017Topics: 35Replies: 6204Has thanked: 11956 timesBeen thanked: 12692 times
Saleena this is certainly the place you’ll find many of the answers you are seeking. Look into our forums written by others who talk about their experiences, their questions they may ask with many offering help and advice so everyone can understand better on so many confusing topics. Sorry about your wife’s lack of acceptance. Many face this troubling ordeal but be asured you have that support and help from everyone here . Relax, get comfortable and enjoy being part of this wonderful community that really does care for all that passes through our doors. Very happy meeting you and welcome.
- May 16, 2022 at 2:36 pm #645702LadyRegistered On: May 14, 2022Topics: 4Replies: 24Has thanked: 47 timesBeen thanked: 86 times
- May 16, 2022 at 2:42 pm #645705Stephanie FlowersAmbassadorRegistered On: June 26, 2017Topics: 35Replies: 6204Has thanked: 11956 timesBeen thanked: 12692 times
I did 5 years ago, not as bad but not too accepting. Over time with much patience she slowly started to emerge in time. Many conversations when she decided to and guidelines and conditions but it’s working well. Hope in time things could become better. Hugs ❤️…
- May 16, 2022 at 1:08 pm #645684Tara RyanLadyRegistered On: April 20, 2021Topics: 4Replies: 486Has thanked: 1555 timesBeen thanked: 1849 times
Welcome, it is lovely to meet you, I hope you make lots of new friends here.
I came out to my wife after we have been going out for three weeks and we have now been married for many years. We have always discussed Tara and come to an agreement about when and where Tara can come out. I am happy to chat and offer any help I can. Please feel free to message me anytime.
- May 16, 2022 at 1:14 pm #645690
- May 16, 2022 at 10:27 am #645655Christina IsmeLadyRegistered On: April 8, 2022Topics: 0Replies: 202Has thanked: 198 timesBeen thanked: 562 times
Yes for those with wife’s it is difficult 😞 the wife wants it to revolve around her, and that can make things difficult. She imagines things one way, that’s where compromising needs to happen. I personally been Christina full time since I was 9 till 62. The girls 👧 in the chatt room can help you, just go into the chatt room and get to know everyone and welcome to the site
- May 16, 2022 at 10:13 am #645647Natasha InaskirtLadyRegistered On: August 6, 2020Topics: 5Replies: 107Has thanked: 164 timesBeen thanked: 531 times
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