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    • #647411

      Hello to all, I am Lee.  I am nervously excited to be here.  I am new to this whole thing. I have not done any serious crossdressing – only women’s panties and had a full body waxed for a couple years. I am in learning mode – slowly learning. I figure this would be a good place to get started.  I am married more than 30 year and I am in my late 50s. I recently told my wife my long hidden desires. Can’t say she took it well but we are still working through it – trying to make some sense of it.  I would be willing to chat about it more but I do not want to get into all the details at this time.

      It’s like joining a party but not knowing anyone… the awkward moment – but hopefully it will turn out to be a blast!  Thanks

    • #647413

      Welcome aboard!   We can all learn together!  Congratulations on taking the dive and everyone here has been amazing so far, I think you’ll like it here.

       

      Sophia

    • #647416
      Anonymous

      Hi Lee,

      Im fairly new on CDH too.  There are many friendly and beautiful ladies to chat with on this site.  So dive in and enjoy yourself.

      Kerri

    • #647417

      Hi Lee!
      Welcome! It is a little daunting at first when you start in this life. I hopefully can offer some insight, based on my years of having been married twice. Cisgirls (genetic females) that are married to us really have a lot to deal with when we tell them/they find out, about are other selves. My suggestion is to take things slowly with her. Don’t go buy a ton of make-up or clothes (you’ll want her advice on this whenshe’s ready). Don’t “force” things on her like “let’s go shopping as girls!” chances are that is not going to fly. You are in what I call “the excitement and giddy” phase. You may want it all and want it now. She doesn’t. She probably doesn’t want any of it. Communicate but don’t make your crossdressing the main topic of the conversation at the dinner table. Ask if it’s okay, or if she’s willing to try, to see how she handles matters such as wearing a bra underneath your top around the house. Maybe wear some women sneakers or flats at home, but don’t make a big deal of it. She probably doesn’t want to see you dressed fully as a woman at this point, don’t push it. You have really tossed her world at this point, and she needs time to digest it. Hopefully she loves you enough to become okay with it. My wife doesn’t, she tolerates very little of it, and has a tendency to make snide comments at times. I have learned to ignore it. My first wife was fine for years with my dressing, but changed her mind much later in our marriage.
      I hope you stick around, this is a good, safe place to visit, ask for advice, pointers, etc. Most of us who are/were married, have been right where you’re at in the coming out thing to your wife. Love her, and don’t let her forget that the man she married is still there, she still needs that, and as you will find, so do you. Someday may you become “her man in bed, her girlfriend out”. Take care my friend, and pm me if you wish to. Hugs, ~Kristen

      • #647483

        Hello Kristen,  I totally understand the concept of do not rush it.  If I were in the “the excitement and giddy” phase, then I have been in it for over 10 years.  Because during that time I have brought many women’s panties that could pass as men and for the last three years I have been getting full body waxes. I started getting wax jobs in parts expanding to the point I get the whole body done. At first she didn’t like it and then she slowly like it. But like you stated about your first, she started to make snide comments – like my legs look better than her and my legs look better than most women.  If only she knew.  Then recently, out of frustration, I told her some of my deep thoughts and feeling.  Her reaction was like a light bulb turning on. She started to put all the pieces together.  Everything started to add up and all the emotions came out, confusion, anger, frustration, and disappointment.  We talked further the next two days. She said she needs time for it all to sink in and meanwhile she doesn’t want to see or find anything. But the paradox, she states, it’s my body and I can do whatever I want to it but at the same time she wants to keep our marriage intact.  I would be happy to talk to you via pm.  Thank you again. Lee

    • #647421
      Fiona Black
      Baroness - Annual

      Welcome to the group Lee. Ask anything you want, there are always friendly ladies here willing to help out.

      • #647466

        Hi Fiona, thank you.  In time the floodgates may open. I do have many questions.

    • #647423

      HI lee, you are most welcome to our CDH site, with understandind and accepting ladies. We are all at different stages, so a lot of is can understand where you are at.
      Be open and honest about your inner princess, and your wife will see that in your eyes.

      May I Wish you happiness and understanding for you both.
      Jane

    • #647425

      Hi Lee,

      Welcome to CDH.

      Alice

    • #647438

      Hi Lee. Welcome to place where you can share and learn in an environment of love and encouragement. You are already taking on some pretty big hurdles, the biggest being revealing your passion to dress to your wife and hopefully working toward gaining her acceptance. It is perhaps one of the biggest issues we face as crossdressers, and probably the most important. The problem is there is no universal solution to addressing the issue. I personally took small baby steps, ‘testing the water’ until I had overcome most of my wife’s concerns and objections. All I can say is we are here for you, whether it’s interpersonal relationships, makeup or fashion tips, or just sharing some of our ‘adventures’ as we journey ‘out and about’. I look forward to hearing how your journey goes. Hugs, Paulette

      • #647465

        Thank you Paulette, I made the mistake to let it all out at once.  I should have taken baby steps. In a way, I did take small steps, but one night I blurted out my thoughts/feels, mostly out of frustrations.  For now, I have decided to recoil a little.  She understand I have some undergarments but doesn’t want to see me wearing them. She has no issues with me getting full-body waxed.   The odd thing, she states, “it’s your body, do whatever you want.” Hard to do that if she objects at the same time.

    • #647439

      Lee: There is no making sense of our mutual life path. It is the reality of what we are. Have patience with your wife and coax her in love to see that you have not changed, but rather like an onion over time subsequent layers get peeled back and revealed, and that there are now more opportunities for her to love you, and for you to show her a side of your love for her that she can be blessed by. Best wishes, Miss gracie.

    • #647445

      Welcome,

      I fully understand the nerves. It’s a scary place to be,  when your just trying to open about who you are. This is such a beautiful group to be part of. As someone who while being on the site a few years.. I vanish quite often and when I return it feels as though I am returning to family. The ladies here have given me some wonderful advice and have never once been derogatory about anything and I’m sure I’ve asked a few questions they are tied of hearing… you are in good hands and even greater company here. I’m more than open for chat anytime. Welcome again.

      Tonya💖

    • #647450
      Anonymous

      Welcome to CDH.

      Within our similarities, there are many different paths people decides to travel.

      Take your time finding yours. Hopefully it will be one you and your wife will be able to transit together.

      • #647456

        Thank you Gabriela. I hope you are right. I would like to hope my wife will too.

        • #647459
          Anonymous

          When we tell our wives about crossdressing one of the big issues is that while we can talk to other CDs, they are often left without anybody to talk about it.
          We do have an area exclusive to wives/Significant Others where they can talk to others facing similar issues as they are struggling with.
          Maybe at some point she could be interested in joining herself.

          Good luck!!

    • #647457

      no need to be nervous the ladies here are very welcoming and friendly, Welcome to CDH

    • #647467

      Hi Lee nice to meet you and happy you found and joined us girls here so get settled in relax and enjoy yourself here.. As for being a new sister and family member you are welcomed with open arms into our home as well as yours now also.. Congrats on having a somewhat supportive wife to confide in time and conversations helps ease the path into girly land ha ha .. As for nervous feelings girl there was a sign wher you entered these doors that Read Please Deposit All Nervous Feelings Here as you will not be needing them inside these doors .. So look around girlfriend as there is a wealth of knowledge here just ask many questions and recieve many answers back  .. So again girlfriend nice meeting you and hope to see you around for a chat sometime..

      Stephanie Bass

      • #647486

        Hello Stephanie  Thank you for the kind words and encouragement. 

        • #647493

          You are very welcome Lee say hello any time..

          Stephanie

    • #647479

      Hi Lee,
      I see that you have attracted many of your new family, so… isn’t it nice to have all these new friends surrounding you at a party and telling you about all the presents you’ll open at your own pace! And we as a family are not bulletproof in life as we all have been on your journey. That said I feel pretty like pretty Pollyanna whenever I am here. You are in your late 50s married for many years and struggle with coming to a balance with the woman who loves you, the Mother of your children.
      Thank God that your path has lead you here. You are in the finest company now of smart, caring sisters who will always be there for you. Trust, love, empathy and the mutual desire to live happy and free. That’s a party!

      Godspeed Lee, my best to you and your family, Jaime

    • #647490
      Amy Myers
      Baroness

      Welcome to CDH Lee. I too was so nervous when I joined up here but soon got very comfortable here. Also I learned a lot about myself and that I’m not alone which in itself was a huge step forward.

      Amy

    • #647568
      Stephanie Flowers
      Ambassador

      Lee

      Welcome

      There’s no need to be nervous as we’re all here experiencing the same thing.  The drive that is pushing us to our feelings to dress may not be in our minds as normal but here with the acceptance and understanding that you see from all that resides here certainly shows how normal things can be so don’t be scared embrace it. With the help and advice from others as well as our very informative forums I hope you can get a better understanding of your inner feelings. Where all this leads is something you need to discover so relax, get comfortable and ease yourself slowly into this wonderful world. I just discovered my feelings for femininity only 5 years ago and now in my 60’s I’ve never been happier but not without its troubling times.  Similar to you late 50s opening up to my wife after a very long marriage and her shock and reluctance to all this. But in time she understood where I was at and knew I’ll still be her man and only trying to open another side of me. This place will certainly help deal with  many  of these confusing feelings. You’ll enjoy these beautiful ladies to talk with and with some get to know , make friends with and receive wonderful advice from.

      We all here to help if we can. Very nice meeting you and hope to see you here soon.   Hugs

       

      Stephanie 🌹

       

       

       

    • #647571

      Dear Lee,

      Hi, Im Aurora Borealis, been on this site for a while. Just want to join in to welcome you! Yes, discovering tour fem side can be strange at first, even troubling as its so new. Howevwr, youre not alone in this.

      As has been said here you will find acceptance and support. Jump in and start making friends!

      Hugs, Aurora B.

    • #647730

      Hi Lee!!!! I am also new here and you couldn’t have stated the feeling better. After hiding for so long this very challenging to finally speak about our feelings. I have found it to be an amazing adventure with the caring women of CDH. Take care, Maive

    • #647733
      Anonymous

      Welcome Lee!!!! CDH is a great community and I’m sure you will love it.

      I’ve relatively new and learning all the time, so we can all go on this journey together!

      Nadia

    • #647843
      Terri Anne
      Ambassador

      Hello Lee,

      Welcome to our amazing CrossDresserHeaven (CDH) site. So glad you have joined us here. Feel free to explore all that our site has to offer.

      The Warmth, Compaasion and Hospitality of our community members can be found throughout the site.

      Please do make use of the forums and articles or public chat room and friendships offered here on CrosDresser Heaven.

      At any Membership level, You can contact any of us via [ PM ] Private Messages.  You can find that link on each member’s Wall under their Profile picture.

      Also, you may find what you need such as Help Center or Ambassadors by using the links in the top R/H drop down 3 bar [ hamburger ] menu.

      Here is a good link to review the membership levels and the privledges for each. Such as Private Chat, Groups, etc.

      Regards,

      Terri Anne, Ambassado

      =========== Link to our public Chat room   ==============

      https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/chat/

    • #647455

      Thank you Christina, for various complicated reason, I could not start at a young age. And as years it got more complicated. I will need to see where this journey will take me now.

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