How confident were you when you first went outdoors dressed fully femme?

How confident were you when you first went outdoors dressed fully femme?

This is a poll to try to assess how many members felt nervous or very confident when they first went outdoors dressed fully femme.

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  • Didnt manage to go outdoors (i bottled it!)
  • Very nervous
  • Reluctant
  • Average (neither nervous or confident)
  • Confident
  • Extremely confident

This topic contains 54 replies, has 46 voices, and was last updated by  Annie Sometimes 3 days ago.

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  • #161921
     Annie Sometimes 
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    Registered On: December 25, 2017
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    I chose “very nervous” but would add “and little drunk…” 😉

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  • #161109
     anne-marie 
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    Though I have been out en femme, its mainly been walking alone after midnight. It feels safest when not many people are about but in reality it’s probably one of the most risky times to be out en femme and alone. If one comes across a phobe type then there is nobody to stop an attack or to get help.

    The very act of stepping out ‘en femme’ is probably the most nerve wracking thing I have ever done and unfortunately for me I have been seen regularly which got me a poor reputation amongst the biggots in my part of the world. Got branded as homosexual (which is false) and a faggot and even had some damage done to the car and recieved some mild verbal abuse.

    Haven’t done this for a while now though – several years.

    The other and more recent times I have been out en femme are much the same as other girls I have seen on here. picking an opertune moment, doing a dash to the car and then just driving around. I have driven the length and bredth of the country whilst en-femme and it does feel great but there has always been a slight niggle of what happens if involved in an accident – lots of terrible drivers on the roads – or, heaven forbid if something goes wrong with the car. I tend to take a change of clothes with me when on a drive and have a large throw in the car which I could use to hide under whilst changing from drag to drab.

    There are clubs in Manchester gay village which have dress up nights on Wednesaday which I plan to go to but haven’t done so yet as mid week and I’m usually to tired for a night out after work and there would be the morning after when I would be very tired – perhaps stop making excuses for myself though and actualy test the waters as I would really like to.

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    • #161279
       Val’sheril Starsong 
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      This reminds me a lot of the closest I’ve gotten to going out en femme: I housesit (quite a bit; by some odd twist of fate I’ve gained a reputation as someone who takes good care of animals).  I’ll confess the urges to try on all those clothes in the relative safety of a house all to myself were at times (read: frequently) overwhelming, and I’d find myself in lingerie, dress, (painfully ill-fitting) heels, jewelry, and makeup, late at night and sleepless, daring myself to dash out to the car and make a loop around the block, or the neighborhood, or the general area… you get the idea.  Once when I was doing double-duty I traveled in broad daylight underdressed and with painted nails just to get that gorgeous pink floral dress from the other house a half hour away.  Nobody noticed of course, and if they did they’re lost to obscurity, but man was that heart racing every time!

  • #160791
     Imogen Mann 
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    First time as an adult… And after many years indoors, I was really nervous about getting from my flat to my car.. Once I was in my car, Happy days.

    Out of the car was at a friendly club, so it was nerve wracking but not too bad.

    Latterly I’ve been stuck indoors again due to circumstances, but the moment I am free from the current bad situation, I’ll be straight out he door again !

     

    Imogen x

     

     

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  • #159678
     Jennifer Love 
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    Registered On: October 11, 2018
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    Hi Fiona, hugs and kisses,

    I guess, what does it mean to go outdoors.  I was told by one of my on line girl friends to start with small inkerments and then move on.  So the very first time I got all dressed up and waited until mid evening when the neighbors wouldn’t be out and scurried to the car and took a drive.  I was more nervous over breaking down, but once I got the swing of it, I clamed down and had a nice drive.  From there I decided I deffinetly wanted to go out in public so I picked a good date, Halloween, and a good place, a gay bar.  Then I check the bar out in drab and spoke with some of the patrons, mostly gay men.  They were very nice and once I told them I wasn’t gay, they understood and were just friends like at any other bar.  The bar had drag shows on many nights, so I started going down, at first I was underdressed and for fun wore my black velvet like pjs, you know the ones that look more like a jogging out fit.

    Then finally the big night, it was thrilling, once I clamed down a bit.  I was uncertain when I arivived and had to walk accross the parking lot, whould I run into a hater?  Would some gay guy try to rape me?  None of that happened.  The closet I got was while out side the bar to have a fag (ciggerette for you American gals) a cab rolled up and two guys in costums got out.  One of them came over and tried to pick up on me.  I smiled and then his friend told him I was a guy.  He looked a little embarassed but was a very nice guy.  Later inside the bar when things got rolling I was walking through a crowd and past the guy, as I did he grab my butt, I kept going and actually enjoyed it.

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    • #161104
       anne-marie 
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      Hi

      It must have been amazing to have guys try to pick you up.

      And for one of them to grab your butt, that must have been an amazing experiance. This type of thing has never happened to me [but I wish it had – lol].

  • #159636
     stephanie plumb 
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    I go out 100% femme for country walks, and have been doing so for many years.  I still set off feeling very nervous, and avoid people, but gradually my confidence increases and I relax and start to have fun.  The key to this is ensuring you know you look good and dressed appropriately.  The confidence increases – hey this is going really well- and I avoid people less and less i.e get closer to them, trying to gauge wether I am passing or not.  So far great!  Relax. Go on, be daring.   Confidence can pass a certain barrier and recklessness takes over ( and sometimes I do things I know I shouldn’t – but that’s another story). I don’t care if I am made anymore. This is fun. This is truly liberating.

    Next walk?  Back to square one.

    Stephanie P.

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  • #159546
     Tessa Love 
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    I was very nervous when i 1st went out fully dressed, I was in my early teens..I posted my 1st time out in a different topic in this forum..but let’s say was very nervous but ince the heels were clicking in the side walk and the breeze in my nylon legs and up the Jean skirt I was flying sky high..it was a good experience, with nonhuck ups or hang ups..but ubmust say instill get nervous when I go out when I can..just that love and excitement stepping out.xoxo

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  • #151092
     Anonymous
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    I went to a BDSM party in Cincy.  I had prior areangements to meet a friend and we went shopping. She did a great job of preparing me w confidence.

     

    I was wearing a dress, thigh highs, panties and bra w pumps

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  • #150269
     sandra louise saunders 
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    I have to say I don’t get out as much as I want as my other life gets in the way, however I first went out in a local city I knew well ( scouted out the places to park and the area I wanted to walk in first ). I was a lot younger then and wore a pale blue minidress with med heels. I found it exhilarating to say the least and nobody seemed to notice. Older but not wiser I have seldom been out in full daylight but that is my ambition this year especially the beach in my bikini. It is like a military operation to get out of the house unnoticed and into my car with the make up remover and spare male clothes to change into in emergencies. Well that is our lot being outgoing females I suppose. Love Sandra Louise x

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  • #149883
     Jen Kelly 
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    I first went out when i was really young.  Wore some of Mom’s clothes.  People thought i was a little girl playing dress up.

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    • #149926
       Amelia walker 
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      Jen,I tried on some on some of my mums clothes when I was four, even though they did not fit me so I stayed in. How did you find clothes that fit you?

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  • #146745
     Stephanie Flowers 
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    Being nervous is an understatement , it certainly is an emotional experience. Last December was the first time ever  out of the house and in public. Met with many at a pub night held every month by a local support group. It was a daunting task but enjoyable in every way. Meeting others like myself  was so exciting and made me feel most comfortable and very much accepted . I did have help from a wonderful  person who resides close   and to I met here on cdh. She helped  me with the support and encouragement to follow this dream of coming true. It makes things much easier when one can go out with the company  of someone else. Thanks Josie.  It takes courage to make that bold move but after a confidence starts to show anything is possible. I hope soon to go out again and maybe even make a decision to move on to better things. Going to a conference I think would be an Ultimate Experience. Only in time one will know. Great question  Fiona. 🌹

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    • #150040
       Melissa Davis 
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      Stephanie mentioned conferences. I was at the Jan. 31-Feb 3 First Event, which attracted hundreds of people (400 at the closing banquet) to Marlborough, MA, near Boston. I met a variety of attendees including girls from Atlanta, New York and North Carolina. This is an annual event. For a list of other conferences, which might be closer to your home, consult the website of the Keystone conference in Harrisburg, PA, which meets in March. That site links to a list of conferences around the country. This was my first conference. I found it a great ego booster to be at a sold-out Best Western dominated by every expression of the orientation that unites all of us. The traditional fashion show included participants from age 9 to over 70.

      Melissa

      • #150274
         Stephanie Flowers 
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        Keystone, that’s the one I was referring to.  It’s going to be my first.  Dressing for one night was thrilling but for several days in a row “oh my” what an experience that will be. Time will tell.  🌹

         

         

        • #150301
           *skippy1965(Cynthia) 
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          Steph-can’t wait to see you there and meet you!!! There will be at least six of our ambassador team there-you, me, Samantha G, Cloe, Rhonda, and Wanda!! Just six more weeks!
          Cyn

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  • #146731
     Brandy Loveslace 
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    I’ve never been out as a woman either, so I can’t vote.
    I just wanted to say that all of you that have are very brave and I admire you all for being so courageous!

    xxx

    Brandy

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  • #146647
     Amelia 
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    I was nervous at first. I even went by my male name (I was in a Halloween costume). As the night went on, my confidence grew and I started going by Amelia. It was great.

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  • #144737
     Amelia walker 
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    I was quite fortunate, partly because of my age, the fact that I live in possibly the transgender capital of the world ( Chiang Mai)and also that I had my wife to support me (and shop with me) I had a fantastic experience. Depending on the community you live in I would recommend taking the plunge.

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  • #144503
     Suzanne Furgerson 
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    1. I was a lucky girl. My second time at  a crossdressing service in East London. After our make-overs I joined three other t-girls  for a girls night out. They took me under their wings and spoilt me. Which gave me lots of confidence. Being one of the girls for the night was fantastic. First to a local restaurant then out to the Way-Out club a LGBT friendly night-club. Up till then the best night-out of my life. Since then I have spent several weekends en femme with my special girlfriends in London, Edinburgh and Brighton. This as made me a very confident girl when out and about. Lots of Love and all the best in 2019 to all you lovely girls here on CH. Suzy.

     

     

     

     

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  • #144220
     fiona moss 
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    Hi Girls, so many wonderful stories about confidence and maybe not so much confidence, either way, well done! seeing this makes me think, why am I still limited to being indoors? it really seems silly of me. Well one day, Fiona will be out there 🙂 . Thankyou so much for all your feedback so far, keep them coming!

    Fiona xxx

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  • #144219
     Anne Preuss 
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    My first time out, I arranged to meet another CD en femme at a coffee shop.  They met me as their male self.  Using googlemaps,  I chose this coffee shop as I thought it would be relatively empty.  I had dressed in jeans, ankle boots, top, wig and 36D breastforms underneath.  I think I do a fairly good job with the makeup and had my nails nicely painted.  But when I got to the coffee shop, it was crowded.  I almost turned around, I was very nervous, but knew I had to do this.  I got out of my car and my CD date got out of their truck to greet me.  I had him hold the door for me (call me old fashioned but it helped to set the mood for me) and as I walked in, several heads turned to look but only briefly and they all went back to their conversations.  We got our coffee and sat down.  There was an older gentlemen at a nearby table whom I could tell kept glancing at my breasts.  I turned my chair and crossed my legs in that womanly way so he could see my chest a bit better.  The date went extremely well and my confidence has grown all the more since I discovered I can blend in, in broad daylight.

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  • #143900
     Jamie Leathers 
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    I have been dressing for many years now and up until the last couple of years my outside the house excursions were just driving or walks at night. But in the past couple of years I have gotten much braver or confident. I have gone to a couple of Trans meetings and out to supper with the girls. I have also started going shopping alone. I like to shop at Target or any other stores with self checkout so that I can keep conversations to a minimum. I have stopped and purchased gas and paid inside. And on a few occassions, like at Boscov’s I have actually paid for panties and bras at a checkout with a real live person waiting on me. It gets easier every time I go. I haven’t ventured out to eat by myself yet. I have also walked around tourist areas and surprisingly, no one pays any attention although I have had a few horns blown at me. Felt good, and scary at the same time. I didn’t want them to approach me. Dress nicely but not slutty and walk with confidence, smell good and people just pass me by.

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  • #143893
     Dawn Judson 
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    I was nervously confident.

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  • #143783
     Bethany Delaney 
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    I’ve walked around my house and yard a bit afraid of my neighbors seeing but I made the first real step this last weekend driving home to Maine from Texas. I walked into a gas station in Ohio and paid for my fuel as I had a lot of cash and not much in my account to use my card. The girl there was friendly and seemed to accept me. I had on eyeliner mascara a white women’s sweater. A stuffed bra tan jeggings and black mid thigh women’s boots. Had my hat on and was obviously male from my face and my shoulders I was really nervous but said why not. I gained confidence every stop until I was back home. When I stopped in Maine I put my regular jeans on over my outfit and my work boots back on and a sweatshirt over the bra and teddy I had on under. When I was driving back the last part I had that on with my sweatshirt half unzipped so people could see what was under it. I think I’d have a lot harder time around here where ivseem to know everyone. But now I want to go out dressed in public. Maybe I can find somewhere in Portland I can go and really dress up. My fiancé burned all my clothes a couple years ago when she found them and I just bought some now she’s not accepting of this at all and said she’d leave me if I ever dressed up again but I can’t keep hiding what I am anymore. I’m just miserable living a lie

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    • #143785
       fiona moss 
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      Hi Bethany, that really saddens me to hear your wife burnt all your clothes, at first thought it seems a heartless thing to do. Unfortunately for us our wives or SO’s are all different, some will be totally accepting, others not at all, with the rest somewhere in the middle. In a case like this, you have to see it through your wife’s eyes, it must be a shock for her, however it doesn’t help you in your plight. She obviously knows now, the fact she found your clothes, so at least you dont have to go through the gut-wrenching process of telling her. She does need to know, realistically, its the only way forward, maybe you could just drop in little pieces of evidence along the way, such as during a light hearted convo or something. Its incredibly hard to make a non-accepter, an accepter, but it can be done, with time, patience and a bit of courage. But beware, it does not work for everyone. Good luck with your journey and I hope things turn out better for you 🙂

      Fiona xxxx

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  • #143778
     Sarah Daniels 
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    I went for a drive at night. I parked in a new residential development with no houses and walked up the street for a 100m away from the car.

    The sound of the boot heels clicking still makes me smile. I was SOOOOOOO nervous but the feel of the air around my legs as I walked in the skirt will stay with me.

    Never take yourself too seriously.

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    • #144221
       Jasmine Jeffries 
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      the first time I was driving around I was 15 I was wearing a pink silk dress pink 4 inch pumps pink panties pink bra sheer energy suntan pantyhose I had on a wig my makeup I thought look very nice and it was one of the most intoxicating happy nights of my lif I still wish I was a fifteen-year-old girl driving around that night I will venture out again in the upcoming months I hope I’m getting braver by talking to you ladies on this site thank you all for being so sweet and for all your help and advice Jasmine

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  • #143738
     *skippy1965(Cynthia) 
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    Here is my first time out story-a vanilla milkshake will always remind me of this for the rest of time! (as it will to the other “old hands” from 2015) here at CDH!
    Cyn

    https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/it-all-started-with-a-vanilla-milkshake/

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  • #143723
     Chantal Audegroit 
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    It was a long time ago. It seemed to me to be placed alone on a huge place with a lot of people around looking at me. Only a fear from perception.

    Now it’s cool.

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  • #143636
     Martina Klarc 
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    My first time out was after my first make-over. I had a 2 hour drive home & worried more about my mannerisms than my appearance. I stopped a couple times in rest areas and had to talk twice to construction flaggers. I was very nervous but all went & ended well, a very exciting experience that I remember fondly !

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  • #143512
     Georgia Warren 
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    I need someone on this websites help I wanna go outside but I’m yung and I haven’t finished my look I’ve only gotten to my bra and panties if your good at putting a style on someone please msg me I wanna get over my my nervousness 🙂 and go shopping dressed!

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    • #149927
       Amelia walker 
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      Oh you are so lucky Georgia! Being young enough to pass as a girl you really have to go for it.I saw a young man recently (about 18) on her own in the sexiest outfit wearing a smog mask.Go somewhere away from family and friends (if that’s a concern) get changed and go out and about.or maybe go out on a motor bike made up under the helmet.

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  • #143511
     Roxanne Lanyon 
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    Very nervous, the first time, but I am trying to learn to get over it.  Lately I seem to adore being dressed as Roxanne, and do feel ever so happy and “free”.

    Roxanne Lanyon

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  • #143470
     Anonymous
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    So yesterday I went out shopping totally femme including makeup. Just casual clothes, jeggings and a light blue v neck T-shirt some rings and a bracelet. Oh and a woman’s pair of short boots and fingernails paint black cherry but no wig. My wife was totally cool with what I was wearing even though it was 100% femme. I did my makeup myself and just did foundation, blush and eyeshadow. Can’t do mascara or eyeliner because of my vision. I actually looked pretty good. But I was nervous about wearing the makeup in public. My wife said I did a good job of it. I was confident in the clothes I was wearing but not the makeup. It’s only the second time I put makeup on myself so was nervous about how it looked. As for being out in public dressed femme. I don’t really care what people say or how they look at me. I am a Transfemine person who just happens to like dressing in woman’s clothes now and damn proud of it. I hide my femininity long enough. Now it’s time for me to show it off. I have the upmost respect for all of you wonder ladies on CDH. You ladies are the best.

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    • #143598
       Melissa Davis 
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      If your vision problem is simply nearsightedness, you might try small-frame drugstore glasses that you put on and take off as you progress. This is admittedly time-consuming. With glasses off apply eyeliner and mascara. It will be messy. Use Cetaphil on a Q-Tip to clean up. You can wear the glasses and slip the Q-Tip underneath the lens so you can see what you’re doing. Without glasses, apply eye shadow and eyebrow pencil. Put the damned glasses back on to check your final work. You might have to clean makeup from your glasses. It’s a bother, but I find it worth all the trouble.

      Does anybody else have ideas?

      Melisssa

  • #142896
     Kelly brown 
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    I just went out for the first time last night fully dressed i drove to the next town and went to a petrol station is was so nervous i drove back out and it took me 3/4 times then I went in its a pump where you pay at other  but filling up my heart was racing my hands were shacking. ..I then drove home.another thing that had me worrying was driving in heels so hard…but il give it time then try again something different but it was a good experience

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  • #142883
     Sapphire Ribbons 
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    Well, I thought of taking a stroll in a park at dusk for my first time out…however that didn’t happen. Then I thought I would drive around the block…That didn’t happen either. I did however take a leap though, there was a meetup group ,which I heard about from a friend on this site, having a gathering so I introduced myself on that site . I told them I would go and I just commited. OMG the days leading up to this was exciting,I even bought a new wig!100% human hair. So my girlfriend and I took the 1.5 hr drive as I was telling myself “I cant believe I am actually doing this “! Exhilarating feeling and I felt pretty confident even as I walk through the door. There were 4 other girls there and so welcoming. I loved it! Can’t wait for the next! This happened this past Friday!

    I highly recommend getting out there girls! Total Bliss

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  • #142877
     Ronda Francine 
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    The first time I went out dressed was about ten years ago. I was going to meet a friend at a local bar and restaurant in town. I was very scared to say the least, but I went in anyway, I encountered a women who was staring at me, I just smiled at her and she smiled back and  went on with her business. I saw my friend sitting at the bar, and went over to her, she was very surprised to see me there. Long story short, I down two margaritas, I was relaxed enough that I enjoyed the rest of the evening.<u></u>

    Ronda Francine

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  • #142766
     Dame Veronica Graunwolf 
    Participant
    Registered On: May 8, 2017
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    I was as nervous as a Cat on a hot tin roof!

    Veronica

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  • #142747
     Michelle Liefde 
    Ambassador
    Registered On: May 27, 2018
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    I went outside in my yard, wearing a dress, heels, wig, makeup and my male coat.  I actually go up to my front gate before I turned around and made a mad dash for the door.  So I feel I really can’t claim to have been out en femme yet.

     

    Hugs,

    Michelle

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  • #142650
     StephieM 
    Registered On: January 11, 2019
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    I answered “Extremely Confident” because once I was in the public, I felt exactly that.

    I rented a motel room my first time going out so I would have a place to dress OR a place to retreat to if it wasn’t working out. I did it alone, I knew I had a friend who was going to be at the event but would have to show up alone.

    So, driving to the motel, getting dressed, doing makeup, all was very nerve racking and scary for me. I gave up on doing my nails because I couldn’t hold my hand still long enough to do them. I only wore lipstick and a bit of powder because I was afraid if I tried to do more I would just screw it up and look worse. It was very windy that day where I was going and I forgot to bring pins to hold my wig so I just went with my real hair which was just long enough for a windblown look.

    But as soon as I was driving to the event in my car as a girl, all nervousness went away, I felt like I was who I was supposed to be and didn’t care at all what anyone would think of how I looked.

    Within minutes of arriving, more than a couple of people complimented my dress and/or told me I looked nice. Those comments and their kind smiles made my confidence soar and I don’t remember being nervous at all the rest of the day and evening.

    EDITED to add:

    The above was technically not the first time I was crossdressed in public but the first time was a Halloween costume and I was very much in denial about my female side. 22 years later, I went out as myself to the local Pride festival, that is the above story.

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  • #142575
     Melissa Davis 
    Participant
    Registered On: September 4, 2018
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    I became absurdly confident on a balmy late September day after nervously attending a group makeover session for the gender-nonconforming at a Sephora location in Cambridge, Massachusetts. Most of the customers paid no attention to the six of us, who ranged widely in age and appearance. I was wearing my usual men’s clothes. When the session finished we had done only foundation and blush. The staff couldn’t have been nicer. One of them said my skin glowed. I bought the foundation and corrector I had used and became elated as I drove home. The foundation looked so good to me that I immediately did my eyes and lips and changed into shapewear and a casual black and white maxi-dress and slingback heels. I can do this, I said to myself as I drove to an upscale mall and walked into Macy’s on a busy evening. I wandered into several other stores and tried on a coat at Nordstrom. I kept a smile on my face and never said a word, though I exchanged glances and smiles with a few women. Mostly I was ignored, as far as I could tell. I was euphoric as I walked across a huge, dark parking lot, a breeze rustling my dress. Well into the evening, I realized I had forgotten all about dinner.

    In retrospect, my makeup was far from professional, maybe far from adequate. I owe my confidence to Sephora. If you live near a Sephora store, see if you can find one that offers free sessions to the trans community. Failing that, individual makeovers are available to anybody making a minimum purchase.

    Melissa Davis

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  • #142412
     Glenda Bingyi 
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    Registered On: July 24, 2016
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    My first time I was determined that this would be it and I still nearly didn’t make it out the door but just pushed myself and off I went.  Was shaking so hard I nearly couldn’t put the key in the cars ignition but after only a few minutes having driven away from where I could be recognised I felt much calmer and in control.  Opportunities for me dont come along very often now but when they do its seize them with both nail polished hands

    Glenda

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  • #142346
     Fiona Simpson 
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    Registered On: January 10, 2019
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    I was really nervous when I left my house en femme for the first time tonight. Went to the local mall and browsed some dresses. Bought a purse. Wow. So exciting. Just do it !

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  • #142316
     Bobbi 
    Participant
    Registered On: September 13, 2018
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    Fiona, I was terrified!  I was 14-15 years old, & in High School.  I decided that as long as I look like a girl, I AM a girl. My breasts were coming in so fast, that I couldn’t hide them, so I decided not to try!  I just started wearing girl’s clothes to school.
    Much to my surprise & delight,  I was accepted immediately! My friends were saying
    “Girl, what took you so long?”.  My love life didn’t suffer, either!  LOL
    I don’t know who or what I was in a past life, but I must have had some good karma owed to me! I’ve been my girly self, ever since!  🙂

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  • #142299
     Caty Ryan 
    Participant
    Registered On: August 27, 2017
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    First few times was late at night, interstate for work, into my rental car and walking along a deserted beach.

    First “real” time was at the Tiffany Club of New England where I got dressed and eventually asked “what time are the pizza’s for dinner coming” .

    Short answer”They aint” So to avoid hunger a few members took me to a restaurant in a nearby town.   I was scared stiff, but it all went off OK. Still have the photos and (literally), “boy, do I look like a man in a dress”.

    These days I have a professional makeover and go wherever I please. would probably be OK with my own, but the “proper job” gives me that extra bit of confidence.

     

    Caty

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  • #142271
     Rozalyne Richards 
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    Registered On: March 10, 2018
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    My first time out fully dressed was out in the back garden and it was late at night when it was really dark, i dressed up and went and sat on my swing seat in the back garden for about an hour it was so relaxed and tranquil just sitting there in the dark,, the first time i actually went out dressed up was some time later when i dressed up and went for a drive in my car this was late at night too because no-one can tell if you are male or female in the dark  I’ve been out a few times at night in my car i seem to get more confident the more i go out,, my next trip is to a place near me called transformation in Birmingham i want to have a make over and have a photo shoot x well will let you know how it goes x hugs Rozalyne x

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  • #142167
     sarasue olson 
    Participant
    Registered On: October 7, 2018
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    Unlike you city dwellers I don’t worry about going outside dressed. I live out in the woods and don’t have any nosey neighbors that can see me. when I lived  in the city it was another story. I also have A cabin on A lake in Wisconsin and again no close neighbors so I can dress and swim wearing anything I want to. I have started wearing women’s jeans with my shirt tale out every where I go and no one has never noticed it, the only men’s jeans I have are only to paint in or other dirty jobs, when they go into the trash I will never buy any more.

    Sarasue

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  • #142148
     Gabriela Romani 
    Participant
    Registered On: October 7, 2018
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    I voted confident. I was practically new to the city (and the country!) so I knew that nobody would be able to recognize me, even if they may be able to read me. That was the first time for a late night drive.

    The first time really in public I was more confident after a few successful night drive outings, so I got crazy and went to a shopping mall and walked from one end of it to the other and them back. So, even more confident next time out was to attend a support group meeting, etc.

     

    Gaby 💜

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  • #142138
     Laura Lovett 
    Participant
    Registered On: November 18, 2018
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    Lovely question, Fiona!

    I cheated (hands up!) and viloted confident for my first time outdoors fully public rather than my first time outdoors per se.

    My first time outdoors was in my teens, and actually, I was massively nervous in case I was seen by the neighbours – so there’s my actual answer.

    First time I went fully public was 18 – but I had no makeup on back then – was too scared of leaving traces of it on my face and getting questioned.

    First time (so many first times!) I added makeup to the mix, I was a 26 year old student. I was a bit nervous, but very excited, and with a group of other students all in fancy dress, so probably didn’t count.

    Next first time, I went fully femme in a Halloween costume across the centre of London, several tube stops to our friend’s house, and back again later, pausing for a quick photoshoot outside the Tower of London.

    But again, I’m not counting costumes.

    First time I just went out, like walked out of my house and a mile and a half across our village, fully femme, I walked with a bright, fresh confidence, tinged with a little apprehension of I don’t know what – probably habitual worry – but quickly got that under control as the feeling of being me being free at last was the perfect tonic.

    Love

    Laura

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  • #142135
     Jasmine Fletcher 
    Participant
    Registered On: September 7, 2018
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    The first times (and there are plenty of them) were following the dog into the garden in order to clean up after him.  The glamour!  I could have hidden clothing under a coat but in the Summer that would look weird.  And I wasn’t going to remove any make-up after spending ages getting it right.   No nerves, I just felt I had to get on with it.  I decided if the neighbours saw me or were around then I would wave and say hi as if everything was normal.  Which in a way I now realise it was.

    One day at the end of September I just got in the car and went for a drive.   It was probably the lack of planning ahead that made it a simple stress free event.  A couple of weeks later I went for a drive and a short walk.   And the third time I took the dog with me and we want for a walk in a public park with people around.  That is it so far but I hope to continue and expand this year.

    Each time was just a sudden decision to get up and go, and to hell with the consequences.  Once I have that mindset I stop thinking ahead: just do.

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  • #142132
     Jean Goodwell 
    Participant
    Registered On: January 9, 2019
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    When I opened the door I was nervous; however as soon as I heard my heels click on the sidewalk I was “flying”. From then on every time I went out the comfort level increased.

    4 users thanked author for this post.
  • #142109
     Bren Whyme 
    Participant
    Registered On: November 30, 2018
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    Fiona Sweetie,

    If I have to fly overseas, grab you by your skirt and drag you out the door, I will do it!! PM me with the closest airport to your house and my SO and I will be there. (My SO might do wonders with your wife’s feelings about Fiona) LoL

    But seriously, When I first went out many years ago I was very confident because I looked like a girl. Real Simple. Now that I have begun x-dressing again and just went out 2 times, I simply said screw it, it’s my life and I just don’t care what people think. I am not passable now and there is not much feminine in the way I look but I’m gonna keep trying and one day I’ll get it right.

    Hugs, Brenda

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