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Ok, so this might me a long drawn out question but its been on my mind. I have been a CD since I was 12, so fair to say I am comfortable identifying as such! My wife is 100 percent OK with too, so I am blessed with that. I also consider myself BI as I do like to think about being with a guy when I am dressed as a girl 🙂
For most of my adult life I’ve been OK with not being able to “pass”. I mean, I am 6 ft 2, 230, big hands and broad shoulders! I have never really considered the possibility of me being trans. I am a good Father to my kid, good husband to my wife and I hang out with guys of course.
But I have lately been curious about HRT. Not so much as to transition, but just to add a little more femininity to my life – if that makes any sense. Would it be feasible to go on HRT for SOME of the benefits? Could I be a more “feminine Man” that looks really good in a dress? Is that even a thing?
I have read allot about going on HRT, but mostly from folks whom are actually transitioning. And please, I am not trying to take anything away from them! I envy them 🙂 I guess its just my fantasy to get some of the great benefits from HRT – without actually transitioning.
What do you think? Has anyone else dealt with this?
Thanks for listening!
Hi Crystalline, I’m far from an expert, but I am in my HRT therapy now. My suggestion is foremost to take hormones through a medical professional. It is very risky to use supplements since they are not well-regulated and you may waste a LOT of money or risk your health.
Have you talked to an endocrinologist? They will be the best medical source to answer your questions. But they (most times?) can’t, or won’t, prescribe HRT without an independent diagnosis from a gender therapoist, or mental health professional (or your GP). You can also contact your local Planned Parenthood. They work with people interested in exploring transitioning, too.
My understanding is the medical team will work with us to the extent we need to feel “whole”. Dosages are somewhat individualized. Low doses of estradiol and spironolactone will ease dysphoria, but won’t do much to us physically. To get any noticeable softened facial features, you would need enough hormones to cause breast development and genital changes (“Shrinkage, Jerry!”). And for anyone 30 or older it will be years before there would be much effect.
Anything (including supplements) that impacts your endocrine system can also do things like kill your sex drive, cause irreversible breast growth, etc. So you need to be ABSOLUTELY sure it is something you and your partner will be okay with.
If you feel comfortable with your life as it is and don’t plan to transition, maybe explore cosmetic procedures to alter your features first. At least that won’t mess up your endocrine system and it avoids complications that HRT comes with (increased risk of heart attack, stroke, DVT, and breast cancer).
Others on this forum probably have better knowledge and experience with it. I’m committed to chemically and socially transitioning this year to live as a female 24/7. But I have been a life-long CD and felt enough dysphoria to be socially withdrawn and have chronic anxiety and depression most of my life. I did get married (40 years last August) but just came out to my wife in July. She thought she’d be okay with it, but we’re struggling. Your partner may be oaky with things as they are, but may not be okay with you changing your body in permanent ways, so just tread carefully!
Hugs,
Brie
The decision to go on HRT is a big one since it takes quite a long time to see results and they vary. You would have to be on testosterone blockers too so you would lose muscle mass over time. Breasts rarely grow more than a small B cup and it does not stop complete body hair growth. It will change where body fat is located but does not change any bone structure. Plus you would need to be under a physical care to have your liver enzymes and other things checked. And to get on hormones you would probably have to be evaluated to see if you really want to go transgender. They don’t give out prescriptions to just see if things change.
It’s a huge decision and one that can be life changing.
I’ve been on HRT 7.5 months and in the process of medically transitioning. I’ve done tons of research on the subject. I won’t get into the weeds about the science or social aspects. It’s simply not realistic to cover all the bases in a single comment. Suffice to say HRT has a lot of potential pitfalls. You have to be prepared to go all in – even if you’re just looking for some of the benefits.
Most trans girls will tell you HRT is life changing. That’s no exaggeration.
It’s not my intention to diminish the experiences and opinions of other girls that have commented. However, you would be misguided to assume one person’s experience is an indicator of what yours will be like. HRT doesn’t work like that. Everyone is different. At best there are general guidelines. Some of the benefits I suspect you desire can’t be realized until other potentially undesirable things start to happen.
I would recommend getting into gender therapy to discover why you want to be more feminine. There’s a good chance you’ll need a letter anyway before a healthcare provider will prescribe meds. Some providers will prescribe meds with informed consent. But I’d still recommend getting into therapy.
Best of luck to you.
Emily
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