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  • #280014
    Amber Jones
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    Registered On: August 8, 2019
    Topics: 1
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    So I’ve just been thinking. I’m a definitely Christian person. I go to a local church of Christ where I live and I consider myself to be pretty involved and growing closer to God as I should be. So that being said, i feel like dressing up in girls clothes is wrong. IF you’re a boy! Now me, I feel like a girl! I can literally lie to bed at night and I Can see myself as a girl. My genes aren’t a girl but I LOVE to do and wear girly things. Does anyone have any way to where I can accept that I’m a girl but at the same time, be right with God?

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    • #391842
      Roberta Broussard
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      Registered On: July 20, 2020
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      Please believe that God knows exactly who you are and loves you as a father loves his child.

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #391783
      Sharon Wiltshire
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      Registered On: July 27, 2020
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      Search for Paula Stone Williams on YouTube:

      https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Paula+Stone+Williams

      In this one she discusses being transgender and her faith, in response to a question

      I came across her Ted Talk videos on your corporate training website to aid diversity training.

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #391771
      Abby M
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      Registered On: October 7, 2020
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      I feel ultimately that what God will care about is whether you are a good person or not. The Bible and other religious texts have been written over centuries by various authors. They have been translated into multiple languages over the years and because of that meanings may have changed of some of the words. These stories are also sometimes meant to be allegories and not taken as gospel truth. So, when you distill all this down, the most important thing to remember is are you a good person and are you doing good works? If yes, then rest easy, I feel that even if society conditioned you to not accept a part of yourself, hopefully there is a being that accepts you for who you are. In Christianity, we are taught God made us in his image, so tacitly from that knowledge God accepts you 100%.

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #386818
      Tabitha Tee
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      Registered On: July 30, 2020
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      We each bring joy or heartache into this world. Be joyful. God loves you. You know this. You walk in His path by not hurting others. That’s it. I consider myself a good Catholic and I can’t imagine where the sin would be in what I do.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #386786
      Bobbi Sue
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      Registered On: September 15, 2020
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      Why feel guilty?    Clothes don’t care what gender is wearing them.   It’s like feeling guilty for liking salmon more than steak.

      💋

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    • #386574
      Amber Jones
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      Registered On: August 8, 2019
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      Thank you guys so much for all of your helpful comments! I would’ve replied to you all sooner but this is my first time getting on this site again in like 4 months!! Thought of ending it all stopped me dead in my tracks and I decided to take a break and get myself back on the right track. Now I’m back and alive as ever! Again, thank you all for your very helpful comments!

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #296052
      Peggy Sue Williams
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      Registered On: June 26, 2019
      Topics: 10
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      Hi Amber,

      I attended the Church of Christ (instrumental) in the 1980s & 90s, so I am somewhat familiar with the CofC.  I have since moved on to an independent fundamental Christian church, where the King James Bible is preached and believed, and I have been washed in the Blood of Jesus Christ and saved.

      For Christians, our cross dressing can be a very real struggle to find peace, as you probably well know.

      IMHO, I can find no reference to gender in my KJV Bible.  However, God does take very clear precise views, concerning sex.  I believe gender is a creation of man, while your sex is assigned by God, when He created you.  Gender issues vary by culture, country, time & place in history, etc.  Man, to me, defines gender, while God created your individual sex.  Cross dressing, to me, is clothes, the pretty clothes that I enjoy wearing periodically.  I am also comfortable being a man, want to remain a man and know for sure I am a man.  However, this man enjoys wearing pretty female things, at times.

      I think as long as we do not use our cross dressing to deceive someone for personal gain, we are sinless, in the eyes of God.

      Some fundamental Christians will cherry-pick Bible versus to support their argument against cross dressing.  To me, they are taking single versus totally out-of-context.  Such is the case with their favorite verse in Deuteronomy.  These very same people see no problem with a woman walking into Sunday church service wearing trousers.  Why?  That’s because American women long ago won their right to cross dress whenever and wherever they please. The same does not apply to us males.

      A girl in our support group is a fundamental Methodist.  She too was conflicted by her cross dressing and the Bible.  Sadly, she shared her dilemma with a church deacon, who subsequently shared this private conversation with the entire church.  Obviously, this fool should have never been ordained a deacon in any church, but it happens all the time.

      There is a book I can recommend to you, written by a member of our support group.  It is available on Amazon and at book stores.  It specifically addresses the issue of the Bible, being transgender, and being a CD.  Message me, if interested.

      Hugs,

      Peggy Sue in Atlanta, GA

       

       

       

       

       

       

       

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    • #296034
      rhonda
      Participant
      Registered On: October 13, 2015
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      Hi Amber I’ve been giving this some thought and been reading up on “sin” from @cognwm.org

      Sin if you think it is wrong then you stop doing it , my problem is I think it’s wrong today and tomorrow I don’t see any thing wrong it .

      Rhonda 🌹🌹🌹

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #280394
      Jennifer McCrennaugh
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      Registered On: July 18, 2019
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      On youtube there are videos of talks given by Dr. Mark Yarhouse. He is not transgender but is very sympathetic. He studies transgenderism, particularly in how it relates to Christianity. His insights have given me great consolation and a new way of thinking. I highly recommend.

      -Jen

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #280382
      Brittney Andrews
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      Registered On: August 1, 2019
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      Dear Amber; I understand the uncertainty you’re experiencing. I was raised Christian and I’m a “born again” believer. I’ve had a liking for female clothes since I was 8 or 9 years old, that’s when I first starting CDing, and it’s been a constant part of me. When I was an early teen; I was forced to stay with a baptist-denomination group home and during my stay my feminine tendencies appeared. They tired to shame me for it, but they didn’t break me of it. I just knew I had to keep it to myself. I’m also a married hetero male and I have no desire to transition. However since late 2015, I accepted myself as a CDer and began searching as to why I liked female clothing. My exploration has lead me discover I’m gender fluid; a male body with a female spirit.

      Society tells us that males are XY chromosome, testosterone hormone, and certain bodily features; and females are XX chromosone, estrogen hormone, and certain bodily features. When we are formed in the womb, we start out as neither and develop into one or the other. However I believe God created variances in these developing factors. As we develop, hormone levels can be lower in some people compared to others. Also, as we age hormone levels decrease. Science has even proven that some people are born with an extra chromosome. Are these people considered mistakes? NO, they were created by God.

      The bible tells us that God assures us every purpose under heaven. God wants us to be happy and to love him, as he loves us. I hope this helps you to figure your questions out.

      P.S. I have to quote a phrase from my favorite film series; Star Wars. Yoda says in The Empire Strikes Back; “Luminous beings are we, not this crude matter”. My advice is be true to yourself; if you feel your soul/spirit is a girl, then you are. I made that realization and I’ve never been happier.

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #280169
      Bettylou Cox
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      Registered On: May 26, 2019
      Topics: 16
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      Charmagne,

      That’s a very logical argument; unfortunately, logic has no voice in this matter. It’s a purely emotional thing, which is likely to plague us for a long time. I can only suggest to all of our sisters that you follow your own hearts.

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #280119
      patty williams
      Participant
      Registered On: January 19, 2019
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      Hi Amber,

      The one thing I was taught is God is perfect and he never makes mistakes.

      He made you and you are not a mistake sweety

      I being a southern baptist feel  I am a sinner all the time.

      I am not a well versed person in the Bible so I can’t give you any biblical assurances.

      These ladies have given you some very good advice.

      I just believe I love God and I feel he loves me .

      I have a Friend who is a openly transgender women that has had horrible things done to her in the name of christianity.

      Christ preached love and kindness his whole life on this earth and I don’t understand how people believe they have the right to do otherwise.

      But they do.

      On judgement day I will be responsible to the lord for my actions ,But I will know I loved Christ and I know I love  people with the treat them with the  kindness that god would want.

      Thats all I can do.

      I don’t know if this helps

      Probably not, its the best I can give you.

      Patty

       

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    • #280112
      Anonymous
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      I understand your situation, Amber.  I am a Christian too, and struggled with thoughts about the sinfulness of my cross-dressing.  As I have come to accept my feminine side, I continue to struggle as I think about going beyond cross-dressing and living life fully as a woman.  I have come to the conclusion that it is possible to do all that and still be right with God.  In a perfect world, all with XY chromosomes would live, act and be as normal, masculine males, and all with XX chromosomes would live, act and be as normal, feminine females.  But, this world is not perfect.  Adam and Eve messed things up in the Garden of Eden.  As a result, all of us humans have to deal with the imperfections of our world and the problems that come from them.  Among those problems are the various diseases, disorders and abnormalities that affect us physically and mentally.  I don’t know exactly what causes us to be CD, TV or TG.  I don’t feel like I have a disease.  Maybe I suffer from a disorder.  I’m definitely not normal.  (I don’t mean for that to sound like a criticism.  It’s just an acknowledgment that my behavior and feelings are not what is typical of most males.)  I’m sure God understands that.  I’ve asked Him for help and I’m sure He’s provided help.  However, just like there are chronic diseases and disorders that we can’t cure, my feminine feelings are apparently going to be with me for the rest of my life.  So, obviously, God is helping me in other ways.  He’s given me the strength to resist the urge to cross-dress when I needed to.  He’s given me friends to help me through times when I’ve questioned myself and what I should do.  The bottom line is that I know that God is aware of all that I have, am and will experience.  He knows that I am human, that I do not always live up to his standards.  I know that Jesus promised us forgiveness and salvation if we believe in Him.  I do believe in Him.  Every day I pray.  I ask God to help me live the life He wants me to live, or I’ll ask Him to help me be the man he wants me to be.  Yes, I’m sure he has an image of the ideal, male me.  I also know that I have not lived up to that image.  He knows what is causing me to do that even if I don’t.  So, I humbly acknowledge that I am not living the ideal life of a normal male, knowing that I am still right with God .  If I am willfully sinning, He forgives me.  If my thoughts, feelings and actions are the result of some kind hormonal imbalance or some other physical or mental cause, then I am not sinning, but just being the person that my genes and my environment have made me to be.  I can’t see Him punishing me in that case.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #280103
      BigBangtheory
      Participant
      Registered On: January 14, 2020
      Topics: 0
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      Dear Amber,

      I can only say that there’s a tremendous difference between religion and faith. More atrocities have been inflicted upon mankind in the name of religion than any other cause. Fifteen years ago I was in such a depressed alcoholic state that I was going to end it all. My daughter just happened to find me with the gun and called the police. Long story short I went to jail and then to a mental facility the next day. My blood pressure was so high that they sent me straight to the hospital. If God had not intervened I would have died one way or the other. I met a wonderful counselor and life changed. Struggling with my past while sober was unbearable. I asked God for help and felt a amazing feeling flow over me and a peace that I had never known. Another time was when my son was dying of cancer. I had prayed that he would get better and had this overwhelming feeling that it would be. Well he died and I was mad as hell at God. I prayed for understanding and once again felt that wash of peace flow over me. I then understood that it was better for my son! I tell you all of this so that you understand. I am not a “religious “ person but I have a very deep and meaningful relationship with God. I know that my God created me and “God don’t make no junk!” Pray deeply for understanding and get out of the way so God can do his work! Hope this helps. Seek your own path. Best wishes… Stephanie

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #280074
      Charlene Victoria
      Participant
      Registered On: November 29, 2016
      Topics: 17
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      Dear Amber, if you read my bio, I make it very clear and without apology that I am a born again Christian. I also identify as a fundamental Baptist. I take the Word of God literally.

      How ironic isn’t it? A literal Bible believer who has pastored and started a fundamental church should so struggle with my own gender congruity. However I do. And after 46 years as a born again Christian, faithful in church, personal Bible reading and prayer, Scripture memory, fasting and more prayer, church leadership, leading dozens of people to Christ, I still can not deny my gender incongruity.

      Genetically, biologically, physically, objectively I am male. No denying the evidence. Yet deep inside I am aware of a genuine feminine essence. I am a woman. I long to relate to others and to be related to others as the woman I sense myself to be. I long to experience everything there is to experience, not just about being a woman, but about being a female. I don’t want to simply present as a woman; I am a woman and I want to be.

      Yet my longings go deeper than even presenting as a woman. I long to be a woman because I am female. It hurts that I can not fulfill all the traditional female roles, especially being a wife, getting pregnant, carrying my husband’s child, giving birth and then being mom.

      I do not believe it is wrong or sinful to be this way. I am fearfully and wonderfully made just as I am, a trans woman. However, how I deal with my incongruity Biblically is where I incessantly struggle.

      Could I not simply give in to my feelings and transition to womanhood? No. The Bible is clear, whatsoever is not of faith is sin. I can not (at this time) transition in faith, thus I can not transition without violating my conscious, so I won’t.

      Perhaps that opportunity may come. Like other decisions I have made in faith I will know when it comes, but it hasn’t thus far in my life. So I choose to stay male, and to be completely transparent, I do so begrudgingly.

      Recently (read my current “your weekly reset” article) God has given me opportunity to learn about myself, i.e. about my self as the female essence that I am dealing with. I am not sure how far I will get to go with my discovery, but I am more convinced than ever that truly I am in heart a woman.

      I am sorry this reply doesn’t give more answers to your conundrum, but I didn’t write it to provide answers as much as I wrote it to provide support.

      Dear sister there are others here with like frustrations and struggles. We understand just how incongruous strong Bible faith and deep inner femme awareness is.

      Hugs,

      Charlene

      aka:Charrie

    • #280072
      Bettylou Cox
      Participant
      Registered On: May 26, 2019
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      Amber,

      I understand your dilemma; I’m a straight, Christian male, active in my Pentecostal church, and fully aware of the admonition in Leviticus against men wearing dresses. But I believe it has to do with the purpose behind that opposition, not the clothing itself. Though I don’t see myself AS as girl, I’m more comfortable in ladies’ clothes, and dress as often as I can. This thing of ours is, of itself neither illegal nor immoral, and it does no harm to anyone. I do not regard my actions as sinful ( though some/many of my fellow members will disagree), and I am at peace with myself and with God. In deference to my wife (also a Believer), I don’t wear dresses in her presence, and she is OK with skirts and other clothing.
      You know what is in your heart, and you should rely on that, not on judgement by others.
      And if you ARE a girl trapped in a man’s body, that is a medical issue, not a morality issue, for which I’m not qualified to address, and would not presume to judge. You may require counseling to resolve your situation, but it can be overcome; please don’t give up on yourself.
      Hugs,
      Bettylou

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    • #280033
      Charmagne Stewart
      Participant
      Registered On: September 30, 2018
      Topics: 8
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      Women dress like men every day, but you can bet your bottom dollar they feel no remorse for it, nor do they feel the need to reconcile with their Creator over it.  God made us all beautiful in our own unique ways, and for some of us, that beauty is best expressed through attire that is generally considered to be female.  We are all equal in God’s eyes, and therefore, there cannot be two different sets of rules.  If we are expected to accept women in men’s clothing, then others must accept the inverse.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #280029
      DeLora
      Participant
      Registered On: October 15, 2019
      Topics: 59
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      Hi Amber, First up, I am not a religious person, but I do spend time thinking about faith and religion.

      It must be very distressing to feel that you somehow are not acceptable to your creator, but could it be that you were created this way for a reason? If you truly feel like a girl that has been forced by your genetics to live as a man that must give you some important perspective. Do you pray or talk to your God? have you asked for guidance?

      Personally I believe that if you are true to your self and considerate of others you can be doing anything wrong. I know society tells us otherwise, but that is a problem with society, not us.

      Not sure how I can help you, but your faith is obviously strong and faith is a great thing to have. I hope you can find a way to be true to yourself and you faith.

       

      best of luck,

      D.

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