If you knew in 12 months you would become invalid would you change your life?

I am curious how others would respond if they became faced with the knowledge that in one year you would not be able to dress yourself. Not only that but also all the other privileges associated with cross dress

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  • Yes
  • How
  • No
  • Why not
  • This topic has 15 replies, 15 voices, and was last updated 1 week ago by Leslie.
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    • #408481
      Paula F
      Registered On: August 7, 2019
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      I will not ever change how I wish to see myself, even in a PVS (Permanent Vegetative State) condition.  My sister and both of my nieces also know and have agreed to honor my wishes along these lines.  I sat and talked with each of them individually when my cancer was found, they know my wishes, and it is in writing on my living will.  They already know which dress ensemble I am to be buried in, and the background CD music to play when I am laid out in the funeral home, I already burned 4 CD’s with what I like and want played, as well as the 3 songs I am allowed for the memorial service.

      Having a diagnosis like I had, out of the blue with no symptoms, does open your eyes to what can happen beyond our control.

      Now, all the sad stuff is over with……. Dance and have a good time!  I want no mourning.


      PS.  Even if I am not ambulatory and can’t dress myself, I can still bob my head with the music.

      • This reply was modified 2 weeks ago by Paula F.
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    • #404218
      karley delaware
      Registered On: October 23, 2017
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      Hi………….I have come to this forum  several times and my mind always floods with emotion.  Finally , I think I can write an answer.

      I do not have any close friends…………my relatives are either gone or  are estranged.    I care for my wife doing this and that……..so for this question………..she will have to predecease  me. ……………………..

      So…………I would definitely retire from work………and spend the time en femme…………being  OUT and ABOUT, getting transformations with photos of me glammed up.   I would buy the clothes that suit the various fantasies of  life in the closet  ( school girl,  college girl, young woman).  I would just deplete my assets enjoying being a girl……………………

      If I can’t enjoy by body being a girl……….the dressing and  sexual satisfactions………………….It’s time to “check out”.   The mechanics of all that still elude me.   karley

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    • #403920
      Lucinda Hawkns
      Registered On: September 1, 2015
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      this is a tricky question?   is it that i become un able to dress up? or the other way around where my wife or s.o . would be unable to get dressed? if it was me where i could not dress up i put how for no one would help me get dressed.

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    • #403913
      Regine Rich
      Registered On: October 9, 2020
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      I voted yes, because of personal experience. Having had my wife as an “invalid”, god I hate that word, for many years, I would never put this responsibility on someone else, I would have to just disappear.
      Sorry for the darkness.

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    • #403840
      Rei Durden
      Registered On: October 11, 2020
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      If I got that prognosis, I’d not be long for this world. Jeez, that’s pretty dark but the mere thought of being a burden on my loved ones is too much to contemplate.

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    • #403639
      Registered On: September 27, 2016
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      I voted no because I love my life. It has turned out better than I ever dreamed.

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    • #403633
      Registered On: May 17, 2020
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      Jackie Sorry if I was unclear with the questions. Paralyzed instead of invalid may be the more appropriate word

      thanks for the Response

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    • #403353
      Kay Anderson
      Registered On: June 1, 2020
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      I kind of think that you could apply this to the idea that we don’t know how long we will live or what will happen to us tomorrow. I fought cancer, twice. Cancer never entered my mind before I was diagnosed. What would you do if you were told that you only had a month to live? They say that we should live each day like it was our last. Appreciate every moment we have. Dress as often as you can and love every minute of it.


      • #403557
        Carolyn Kay
        Registered On: August 25, 2016
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        Hi Kay, when your doctor says that “C” word cancer, it does open your eyes to what time you have. I had some major surgery and was so very lucky they seemed to get it all. That was 13 years ago but I am still waiting for it to come back. I have enjoyed being femme much more ever since.

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    • #403232
      Registered On: February 18, 2016
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      I voted no but in all actuality I don’t think (call it a blonde moment) I really understand the question! Invalid to what? I will always be me no matter what!

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #403184
      Wendy Swift
      Registered On: May 11, 2020
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      I’ve wanted to start a new topic on a very similiar subject; but you beat me to it 🙂

      I have thought about it alot.  It would devastate me not being able to transform into Wendy, she has been a part of my life for over 47 years, and you just can’t quit that side overnight.

      Like you, I have my CD bucket list, and this halloween I was able to cross off one item from the list, which is to dress up on Halloween to pass out candy to the kids.



    • #403136
      Rachel Cross
      Registered On: October 13, 2020
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      yes i would have to change. nobody knows i dress now and if i couldnt dress, id have to go back to my old self. i guess thats why i have a cd bucket list. so i can get as much as i can done before i cant do anything anymore. and i do get alot on my list done.

    • #403072
      Emily Alt
      Registered On: August 24, 2019
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      Knowing of that dystopian future, absolutely I’d change. I’d live every day as a woman.

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      • #409944
        Registered On: September 14, 2020
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        AMEN to that I would every day of it as the best woman I can be!

    • #402997
      T.J. Byron
      Registered On: October 18, 2018
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      No question! Change, yep! I have been CD ing for over 50 yrs. I would not want to think of not dressing.

      Dr. T.J.

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