Insult or Compliment

[Anonymous]

As some of you know, I am in the process of a legal separation from my spouse. I have decided not to live in that negative space but to move on in a happy, positive way.

I subscribed to one of the online dating services as Tina Que. One of the checks that is available is verifying whether your pictures are real by taking a video of you front, right and left side of your face to compare to the pictures you uploaded. This ensures people are not posting false pictures. I had no issues with verification until I added the picture of my new hair-do (I am now a red head with a very nice pixie cut).

When I uploaded the newest picture it was again verified with what was on file. The dating software determined that I was now a female looking for a male versus the male looking for a female that I entered in my profile.

I am now being flooded with males searching my profile. It is kinda flattering that software believes I am a female. I am a crossdresser looking for a cis-woman. Not a female looking for a male.

[Lara Muir]

Poor Tina! Technology is great… when it actually works.😣

Hopefully you can at least enjoy the compliment with the software seeing you as female.

💕Lara

[Araminta Purdy]

I would think that any flood searching my profile would be flattering even when inconvenient.

Araminta.

[Emily Alt]

Be careful what you wish for….

[Ashley]

I’d consider it a compliment, even if it’s an annoying one. A little bit like getting accused of cheating at something when you know you’re not.

[Deborah Sullivan]

Compliment I would say. No different than a stranger calling you madam in public

[Anonymous]

Congrats!

Now you know what its like to be flooded with requests from men like most all GG’s are who post on social media. Men will tell you almost anything to get your attention so beware and be sure to let them know you’re a CD before taking things too far.

[Anonymous]

I paused my account until they get it straightened out

[Anonymous]

What, no female looking for female option? It’s nice you put the CD question to rest in the profile.

Assumed a female is a good thing, most times.

Eileen

[Anonymous]

Hi Elieen.

Assuming the men even read Tinas profile which many don’t but just respond to a pic. I know you understand this.

I have an account on another site with many pics but don’t show my face and get messages from men all the time and its obvious they haven’t read my profile…. men!

[Anonymous]

We must be doing something right with our appearance. I don’t think there is any confusion that I am a crossdresser.

[Anonymous]

Spot on, Tina and Michelle.

There are men that date CD’s for, well, uhm sex. Most just see a photo and type a response with whatever is available. You know what I mean. In the female world, get used to it. Kinda puts how women tend to view men in a different perspective now, doesn’t it?

Good luck Tina, and hope your site issues are resolved, and find a compatible partner.

I’m already married!

Eileen

[Anonymous]

I would agree with female looking for female if it meant people wanted to connect with me. unfortunately a lot of females looking for females are not females looking for crossdressers

[Stephanie Bass]

Sorry for the troubles Tina but they see you as what you are a woman yes  .. Cant blame them he he ..

Stephanie

[Anonymous]

I can’t.  I have been chatting with someone who’s daughter is trans. She is accepting. Here’s hoping.

[Mika Slinky]

Very interesting thread this. Many thanks for posting, Tina. I have been doing a bit of reading recently as research for my blog and came across posts from women who are attracted to cross dressers. They explain that at the time they discovered their partner was a cross dresser, they were in the honeymoon period of the relationship. That they were so in love that it wouldn’t matter what their preference in the bedroom was or the contents of their wardrobe, they would most likely be open to it. My interpretation of this is that it might apply to a younger generation, maybe 25-35ish that are already pretty open-minded, but I’m not so sure about women in their 50’s. I, too, opened an account on a dating site as a male looking for a female and used my CD photos for my profile. I was hoping to start conversations with women, expecting to have to answer questions and face criticism. My account was rejected. I have been divorced for 6 years now and don’t feel I want to embark on a relationship without being upfront and honest about my CD persona at the start. However, I am now of the opinion that it is much more realistic to try and date as my grab self and drop the bomb a little way into a relationship, if I want to increase the chances of meeting someone tolerant. Is this being honest, though? Should I be up front or guarded? If I want to be up front, it seems that I will have to display a photo of my male self for my profile as well as one of Mika. I’m not sure I am ready for that, as no one apart from my sister knows I am a cross dresser. Such a dilemma! Mika xx

• This reply was modified 1 year ago by Mika Slinky.

[Clarissa Cross]

Mika the tactics you are planning with dropping the bomb early in a new relationship has worked for me 3 times and one time I was told it was ok but in the end I was in a DADT relationship that ended quickly from my side since I didn’t want to live that way. I think it’s  a good strategy just to tell before we get too involved in a relationship

[Anonymous]

I feel the same in many ways. I don’t want to start something where I would then drop the bomb and hope for the best.

There are sites that are for women looking for women and men looking for men but not men dressed as women looking for women. The sites that do are hookup sites.

[Stevie Steiner]

Haha, the AI program isn’t as intelligent as it thinks it is…

Tina, although those results were not what you expected or were looking for, you have to see it as a HUGE compliment.  I certainly would!  🙂

Stevie

[Author]

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