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  • #634830
    Helena Field
    Participant
    Registered On: February 14, 2022
    Topics: 2
    Replies: 46
    Has thanked: 194 times
    Been thanked: 223 times

    Hi
    I live in the UK and have been crossdressing since my teens.
    Now on my 60’s.
    Stopped crossdressing when I married but started again about 10 years ago putting on my wife’s panties and dresses.
    Started buying my own lingerie but after a couple of weeks would stop and through everything away.
    I think I am a secret crossdresser my wife hasn’t said anything although she has found some panties lying about I just say they’re not mine.
    Joined CdH 6 weeks ago after seeing the site online at beginning of year.
    I have since joining bought 3LBD,2 skirts 20pairs of panties,2bras tops tights and hold ups.
    I feel a lot happier now I can talk to other girls,and more confident.
    This week I went outside as Helena only to recycling in back garden,but it was a first.
    Don’t have wig, makeup or accessories.
    Does the urge/desire to crossdress go away.
    It hasn’t to Helena yet.
    I hope Helena stays a part of my life for a bit longer enjoying having her around and being one of the girls.
    Love
    Helena

Viewing 44 reply threads
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    • #644544
      Jocelyn Beyoody
      Duchess
      Registered On: May 4, 2022
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 86
      Has thanked: 183 times
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      I’m tearing as I write this. I’ve never been so honored to be apart of something, anything. I never fit in, though you would think I had it all.
      I want to thank you all.
      i am 55. Started at 10 and dressed off and on until little over a year ago. I always seems to go to Jocelyn when I needed someone in my corner.
      As so many have stated, Jocelyn is my home. I can’t and nor do I ever want to know a day with her beating within me.
      No the desire doesn’t ever go away. And I am so grateful it hasn’t.
      I feel so blessed, and I don’t even know you girls. My heart does, that’s all the verification I need!!

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #644538
      Lauren Mugnaia
      Duchess
      Registered On: November 1, 2021
      Topics: 15
      Replies: 353
      Has thanked: 3654 times
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      NO!!! It doesn’t go away! As a matter of fact, for many including myself, the only way it “goes away” is when you finally reach the place where you are dressing full time permanently. Then, and only then, does the urge “go away” Enjoy! 🙂

      Love,
      Lauren M

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #644489
      Venus Envy
      Lady
      Registered On: April 9, 2022
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 30
      Has thanked: 28 times
      Been thanked: 110 times

      I’ll be 70 this year.
      At least 60 years loving the femme.
      Didn’t start sharing until about 5 years ago. Practically totally with gg friends. Haven’t found any who weren’t accepting. Makes me realize what good friends I have, and how much time I’ve spent hiding

      Retired now so I have more chances to dress at home, go out underdressed, wear lipstick, earrings, and mascara.

      I said all that to say this. It has not gone away.
      I have accepted myself with counseling and those good friends.
      If anything, it may be stronger. But not as sexual as when I started.
      But so much more relaxing and comfortable with no sense of shame.
      So much better after all these years

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #644381
      Roberta Lane
      Lady
      Registered On: May 10, 2022
      Topics: 10
      Replies: 89
      Has thanked: 391 times
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      Welcome Helena.I am in my sixties too.My official crossdressing start was 1972.There has been a couple of false starts at age five or so when I tried wearng my mother’s stockings without much success.Then at age ten my female cousin dressed me up in her clothes.But that first official time wearing my mum’s tights / pantyhosd in the autumn of 1972 was an awesome experience.Fifty years down the line it’s stayed with me all these years and means so much to mr.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #643826
      Trish White
      Baroness
      Registered On: December 2, 2021
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 358
      Has thanked: 1654 times
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      Hi Helena, for me the urge to cross dress is a part of me and has been since I was about 6 but back then I didn’t know what it was. In the 66 year since the urge has never gone away, it’s with me 24/7. Truthfully I would never want it to go away, Trish is as big a part of me as her male counterpart, maybe bigger. I read and article somewhere that said, if there was a cure for cross dressing would you take it? Almost all the girls who responded said no there’s no way they would take the cure. There’s nothing more exciting or satisfying that being in front of a mirror and watching your self slowly become a beautiful women.

      Love,

      Trish

    • #643819
      Deborah Sullivan
      Lady
      Registered On: February 27, 2020
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 974
      Has thanked: 4701 times
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      I guess it’s all been said Helen but again I have known hundreds of cds over the years in clubs and therapy and we all agreed it never goes away. Yea some girls have gone years without dealing with it but it always returns in life as my therapist says. So we accept it and just deal with it as an innate characteristic we were born into . Just accept it and enjoy the wonderful thrill we experience. I consider it a gift to be able to experience both lives and not a burden or pathology.

    • #639638
      Donna Rice
      Duchess
      Registered On: August 14, 2017
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 4
      Has thanked: 2 times
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      No it doesn’t go away especially for me the desire gets stronger by the day especially in 2022. I’m accepting and release her to the wild. I’m only in my 30s

    • #639636
      Dawn Judson
      Ambassador
      Registered On: November 26, 2017
      Topics: 16
      Replies: 195
      Has thanked: 471 times
      Been thanked: 940 times

      NOPE

    • #639635
      Anonymous
      Topics: 0
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      I found it never goes away and boy have I purged but finally gave into my urges. My life has become whole lot more simpler with no more drinking.
      So go for it and enjoy your feminine side

    • #639630
      Holly Morris
      Lady
      Registered On: April 15, 2022
      Topics: 64
      Replies: 151
      Has thanked: 1906 times
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      Hi Helena, this is Holly.

      I just jioned CDH a few days ago, but saw your question and wanted to reply to it.

      I can tell you from personal experience that being a crossdresser is something that does not go away. Ever. Sure, you can try and hide it from others and deny it to yourself, but if you’re a crossdresser, she’s a part of you that will always be there. She may not be out and she may not be obvious, but she will always be there with you.

      My advice is to accept her and let her be part of your life. Whether you’re out and open is your own choice, but don’t make yourself miserable by trying to be someone you’re not. You’ll only make yourself more miserable by doing that. Plus, if you go through the whole binge and purge cycle that so many of us are familiar with, you’ll end up spending a lot of money over time that you then throw away, but then wish you had never done that, and then go out and replace those things again. It’s a crazy cycle and it makes you feel worse.

      So be thankful that you have this part of you and embrace her. Most men will never know what they’re missing, which is really so sad. So be glad that you’re able to celebrate and experience this part of your life, because truthfully, it’s wonderful to be a woman!

      Anyway, that’s my perspective based on my own life experiences. I hope it helps you somewhat.

      Hugs,

      Holly

    • #639623
      Cris Thomas
      Lady
      Registered On: January 16, 2020
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 7
      Has thanked: 62 times
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      I hope it never goes away.I love this part of me,I love everything about it.Wish we could share it with others ,that is the hardest thing ,keeping something you love a secret.Would love to just walk out the front door and not be a big deal to others.

    • #639621
      Krista Writeme
      Lady
      Registered On: August 22, 2019
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 39
      Has thanked: 226 times
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      Hello, Your question brings me to tears.I have been dressing for 50 yrs now, I am 70 yrs. old.I love dressing,I makes me feel so alive,well,I should say,it made me feel so alive. My interest is slowly fading.I was dressed one day,I took a good look at myself in the mirror,both dressed and nude,I look like hell.I look so old,so tired,so ugly! I talk to my partner,she could care less.I need a shoulder to cry on.Any offers?

      • #643822
        Trish White
        Baroness
        Registered On: December 2, 2021
        Topics: 3
        Replies: 358
        Has thanked: 1654 times
        Been thanked: 1354 times

        Hi Krista, I have two shoulders to cry on any time you need them. I can relate, I’m 72 and it now takes me about an hour to get Trish looking respectable. Back in the day I’d be ready to go in 20 minutes but it’s time well spent. Take care and you can message me any time.

        Love,

        Trish

        3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #639580
      Deborah Thomas
      Registered On: January 6, 2022
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 11
      Has thanked: 26 times
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      Not for me! I’ve finally decided this year that I’m going to fully embrace it.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #639478
      Christina Isme
      Lady
      Registered On: April 8, 2022
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 404
      Has thanked: 416 times
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      No it doesn’t go away accept it and start enjoying it will better your life

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #639476
      Fancy Nancy
      Duchess
      Registered On: October 11, 2019
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 14
      Has thanked: 6 times
      Been thanked: 30 times

      No, it doesn’t go away. Just accept it and really enjoy it. Nancy

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #639456
      Jane Mansfield
      Lady
      Registered On: December 27, 2020
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 320
      Has thanked: 644 times
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      Hello Helena, you are welcome to a site of varied and doverse talents. Acceptance from others helps especially family, but it is what you feel. For me it has been a long journey, but lately, femming up at work, and socially.
      You should always feel comfortable, so little steps forward worked for me.
      Enjoy your life. Treat yourself.
      Best Wishes
      Jane

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #639416
      Gine Lynne Carter
      Lady
      Registered On: April 16, 2022
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 6
      Has thanked: 143 times
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      I don’t think it goes away. It might come and go a bit occasionally though. As I get a little older I seem to have a greater need to indulge my feminine instinct. I want to dress more completely and more often and feel that beautiful rush of femininity.

    • #637973
      Cody Meow
      Lady
      Registered On: March 1, 2022
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 53
      Has thanked: 220 times
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      Personally, it fades significantly but always returns. I usually don’t like to use the word “always” but it’s been about 40 years so….☺️

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #637966
      Frederica Woodbridge
      Lady
      Registered On: October 25, 2018
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 29
      Has thanked: 4 times
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      It doesn’t go away. I first tried on my mother’s nylons when I was 12, hasn’t changed since. I’ve been married twice, divorced once and during the last 9 years since my wife’s death I’ve let my cross dressing imagination run wild. I met a woman who wanted me to go out dressed, and now have a lovely young lady who doesn’t like me wearing bars but appears happy with everything else.

      After lots of outdoor trips I’ve realised my cross dressing needs are sexual, and there’s nothing more fun than wearing nylons and then disappearing into a bedroom with a woman wearing nylons.

      Nylon legs slipping together are the best.

       

       

      4 users thanked author for this post.
      • #637970
        Frederica Woodbridge
        Lady
        Registered On: October 25, 2018
        Topics: 0
        Replies: 29
        Has thanked: 4 times
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        I read all the comments after posting mine.

        I don’t know how this works, but the reality is the urge never leaves.

        Don’t wait to get caught. Lots of explaining after that. Don’t wear lacy underwear, make a mistake and have her find them and ask you a nasty question.

        The whole CD thing can be fun, for both of you. Be honest, open, clear, wear sexy outfits and ‘wow’ your girl with your imagination.

        3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #637943
      Liara Wolfe
      Lady
      Registered On: August 14, 2021
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 1607
      Has thanked: 3155 times
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      The feminine desire never goes away. Welcome to CDH.

      Hugs, Liara

    • #637646
      Charlotte Lapin
      Lady
      Registered On: December 12, 2019
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 52
      Has thanked: 25 times
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      For me, the urge to crossdress started around ten, with the usual sneeking of mom’s undies and standing in her pumps.  When I got caught, it lead to years of therapy.  There was no shame used, but they felt it was something which needed to be fixed.  Since I found it easy enough to suppress expressing my feminine side is such a forthright fashion, I kept Charlotte hidden away for a long time, including decades into my marriage.

      Then one day, Charlotte kicked down the closet door and told me things had to change.

      So no, it doesn’t go away.  For many, the nature of the need changes over time, often from being a sexual thrill to a comfortable and comforting normal.

      If I may make a suggestion, regarding the matter of your wife finding your underthings and your denial.  In my opinion, it is a bad strategy.  She will likely be left thinking one of two things.  Either you’re cheating on her, and your mistress(es) are leaving things behind, or that they are yours and you’re lying to her.  In both cases she’s going to be hurt and resentful.  The fact she hasn’t already given you an ultimatum suggests to me she’s assuming the latter of the two scenarios, and is patiently waiting for you to come clean and talk about it.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #637641
      Emily Alt
      Duchess - Annual
      Registered On: August 24, 2019
      Topics: 17
      Replies: 922
      Has thanked: 822 times
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      In my experience no.  I believe we’re wired this way.  There’s no cure.  Some of us can repress the urge, but the urge always comes back.

      Personally, I’ve known I was different since I was 4….when I tried to put on a bra.  Decades of denial and countless purges followed.  No more of that.  I accepted who I am 6 years ago and started a physical transition last September.

      • #637645
        Ambermaria Martinez
        Duchess
        Registered On: July 8, 2018
        Topics: 5
        Replies: 101
        Has thanked: 47 times
        Been thanked: 382 times

        No not at all does The urge to cross dress ever going away for me it only gets much much better and I’m just LOVING IT SO SO MUCH

        4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #637482
      Carmen Cruz
      Lady
      Registered On: September 12, 2021
      Topics: 33
      Replies: 341
      Has thanked: 504 times
      Been thanked: 1987 times

      Welcome to the site Helena!

      I can’t answer that question because I’ve only been doing this a couple years and single. I don’t have experience in trying this as a non-single.

      For me, I guess the question then reads… “Do I WANT it to go away?”… and right now, while I’m single, the answer is a resounding NO WAY! LOL. So much fun as a single person! The attention isn’t even comparable to my boy life… and my boy life was pretty active in that area of attention, and still, Carmen generates a million times the amount I can ever achieve as a man.

    • #637477
      Helena Field
      Lady
      Registered On: February 14, 2022
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 46
      Has thanked: 194 times
      Been thanked: 223 times

      Hi
      To all you girls that replied to my intro and question regarding urge/desire to crossdress go away.
      Thank you.
      I realize that for most of us it doesn’t.
      I happy being Helena and finding CdH site has made me more positive and not embarrassed when buying more girly clothes and lingerie.
      As I said I hope Helena stays part of me for a long time,and I get comfort for reading the stories on this site.
      Love
      Helena

    • #635262
      Anonymous
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 0
      Has thanked: 0 times
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      Negative

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #635250
      Alice Underwire
      Lady
      Registered On: September 16, 2019
      Topics: 95
      Replies: 5400
      Has thanked: 7469 times
      Been thanked: 13900 times

      Hi Helena,

      Welcome to CDH.

      Alice

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #635203
      Terri Anne
      Ambassador
      Registered On: February 7, 2018
      Topics: 32
      Replies: 1287
      Has thanked: 1907 times
      Been thanked: 2788 times

      Hello Helena,

      Welcome to our amazing CrossDresserHeaven (CDH) site. So glad you have joined us here. Feel free to explore all that our site has to offer.

      The Warmth, Compaasion and Hospitality of our community members can be found throughout the site.

      Please do make use of the forums and articles or public chat room and friendships offered here on CrosDresser Heaven.

      At any Membership level, You can contact any of us via [ PM ] Private Messages.  You can find that link on each member’s Wall under their Profile picture.

      Also, you may find what you need such as Help Center or Ambassadors by using the links in the top R/H drop down 3 bar [ hamburger ] menu.

      Here is a good link to review the membership levels and the privledges for each. Such as Private Chat, Groups, etc.

      https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/membership-account/membership-levels/

       

      Regards,

      Terri Anne, Ambassador

       

      =========== Link to our public Chat room   ==============

       

      https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/chat/

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #634991
      Lara Tucker
      Lady
      Registered On: September 29, 2021
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 1075
      Has thanked: 23739 times
      Been thanked: 3818 times

      Hi Helena,

       Welcome!

      I didn’t have the urge until later in life. Over the last 3 years they came on strong. I’m guessing that this feeling is not going away.

      Based on what most of the other girls are saying here I’m thinking it will only get stronger as time goes on!

      Embrace, enjoy!

      💕Lara

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #634989
      Teri Linnealis
      Lady
      Registered On: January 28, 2022
      Topics: 10
      Replies: 89
      Has thanked: 221 times
      Been thanked: 428 times

      Helena,

      I have very little to add. You can pack it away at times, forget its there then just like a “Jack In The Box” it pops up again. Usually as you get older your estrogen levels increase and the desire to be more feminine becomes even stronger. If you like the desire, embrace it for it can be wonderful. If you hate the desire, I sympathize since I have never heard of anybody being “CURED” from it. Hugs TERI

      • #643808
        Ambermaria Martinez
        Duchess
        Registered On: July 8, 2018
        Topics: 5
        Replies: 101
        Has thanked: 47 times
        Been thanked: 382 times

        Omg terry you are so so right as I get older (66)now I’m really really really feeling much more femmine than I’ve have been in the past and I’m just LOVING it so so much to me it’s not a fetish but something that I really really love doing not as a hoppy but the way I love to live my life 24 -7 as ambermaria I keep my self femmine 95 percent of the time and it’s not. ENOUGH I definitely want. A 100 percent

        2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #634980
      Paulette Parfois
      Duchess
      Registered On: November 17, 2021
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 555
      Has thanked: 1879 times
      Been thanked: 2115 times

      Hi Helena, I am a senior crossdresser who just resumed it about five years ago. When I did I decided to be open and up front about it with my wife and family. The results have been wonderful, with my wife buying me clothes, wigs and posing for photo shoots with Paulette. It has been so much fun. I look forward to hearing more from you in the coming weeks. Hugs, Paulette

    • #634945
      vannesa Courtney
      Lady
      Registered On: August 13, 2017
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 8
      Has thanked: 4 times
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      Just like Sandy said…”I find that I’m calmer and happier “. I have finally accepted the fact that the desire never goes away and I feel so at ease and happier when I become Vannesa.
      Knowing that there are others like myself also helps me know I’m not alone 😊

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #634943
      Donna Allen
      Registered On: October 18, 2019
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 2
      Has thanked: 128 times
      Been thanked: 78 times

      In my experience, no, it won’t go away.

      What I would like see go away is the stigma of being a crossdresser. Wouldn’t that be nice.

      Some studies have shown there is a physical cause for it. I apologize that I don’t know the science well, but it has to do with brain structure.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #634938
      Michelle McQueen
      Lady
      Registered On: June 14, 2021
      Topics: 28
      Replies: 1512
      Has thanked: 9796 times
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      Every girl here will tell you…

      NO IT NEVER GOES AWAY… EVER!

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #634926
      Natasha Inaskirt
      Lady
      Registered On: August 6, 2020
      Topics: 5
      Replies: 108
      Has thanked: 164 times
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      No it never goes away, sometimes you suppress it, but the need just comes back stronger. In my experience the first step is you need to come out to yourself, admit you are a crossdresser and you like to wear women’s clothes. Then you will be happier.

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #634875
      Anonymous
      Topics: 0
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      No.  I must admit there have been times in my life where I would  hoping CD’ing would go away.  Even though I’ve had multiple pauses in by CD’ing the urge has always come back.
      It’s part of you and all of us here.  We’re all special.  J

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #634856
      Stephanie Bass
      Hostess
      Registered On: November 30, 2019
      Topics: 25
      Replies: 3915
      Has thanked: 56087 times
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      Hi Helena nice to meet you and as these other wonderful ladies have said it will never go away its the pink fog girlfriend .. Its in your heart and sole so girl dont purge it just gets so expensive and you loose some pretty cute dresses in the process .. If that erge hits just pack them away for another foggy day he he .. As for the wife finding panties girl she knows either your cheating on her or the CD thing is a foot either way if you really love her and want to save your marrage girl the talk is needed im not a expert on this but the righting is on the wall.. I have been married just past 39 years and came out to mine just after we were married and she was accepting and supportive as where we live have never been out as Stephanie  just not going to fly here in my area but couple of weeks ago went to Keystone conferance in PA. with some wonderful girlfriends from CDH and wife in hand we had a wonderful time so just something to think about girlfriend hope things work out and good luck ..

      Stephanie Bass

    • #634854
      Anonymous
      Topics: 0
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      The only time it goes away is when one shoves it deep down in the closet and locks the door… Eventually the lock breaks and one finds themselves in pretty panties and a dress or whatever it is one wears.

      So… no one’s gonna talk about your wife finding panties and you saying they’re not yours?  A lady knows her panties, so if she finds them and knows they’re not her panties, and you say they are not yours… well that doesn’t equate well.

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #634852
      Celeste Starre
      Lady
      Registered On: June 26, 2018
      Topics: 51
      Replies: 1479
      Has thanked: 389 times
      Been thanked: 5442 times

      No it does not go away. I’ve found the older I get the stronger it gets.

    • #634851
      Ria Freichuk
      Lady
      Registered On: June 6, 2020
      Topics: 2
      Replies: 153
      Has thanked: 569 times
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      I am now in my 6th decade of crossdressing and still love it. I have underdressed just about everywhere and dress en femme when possible. I went through a medically induced coma and wondered if I would be different after. Well I was, I began dressing more. Now I am a senior and will continue to express my female side.

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #634850
      Meeshelle Pauly
      Lady
      Registered On: January 15, 2022
      Topics: 0
      Replies: 57
      Has thanked: 104 times
      Been thanked: 233 times

      Helena hello
      Apparently it never goes away. Not for me so far. Enjoy what you can.

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #634840
      Chrissy Simpson
      Duchess - Annual
      Registered On: January 14, 2022
      Topics: 1
      Replies: 287
      Has thanked: 1670 times
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      Hello and welcome Helena.  I don’t think it will go away.  We have all been through the buy and purge over the many years.  If I am on here I am Chrissy.  I feel happier as Chrissy and wait to get home to go back to her.   So enjoy the site and flourish.
      Chrissy

    • #634839
      Iris Shine
      Lady
      Registered On: March 8, 2022
      Topics: 3
      Replies: 48
      Has thanked: 93 times
      Been thanked: 208 times

      Welcome Helena,

      For me no, it always comes back. Just like you I threw my female clothes 3 or 4 times in the past and said no more. But after a period the urge was back.

      Love ❤ Iris

    • #634835
      Marti
      Duchess
      Registered On: February 5, 2019
      Topics: 62
      Replies: 957
      Has thanked: 4975 times
      Been thanked: 4523 times

      Hi Helena,

      Welcome to cdh. You’ve found a safe and friendly place to be. And it makes such a difference to know you aren’t alone.

      Does cross dressing go away? I think the simple answer is no. It may ‘go away’ for a while, but also comes back, it would seem.

      There’s been periods in my life when I haven’t really felt the urge while also knowing it’s not gone away. It took quite a while to accept it’s just a part of me. I’m not sure I could or would want to ratchet back these days. I feel better for it.

      Marti xxx

    • #634834
      Jane Mansfield
      Lady
      Registered On: December 27, 2020
      Topics: 4
      Replies: 320
      Has thanked: 644 times
      Been thanked: 1104 times

      Warm welcome too you Helena.
      The answer is no on the love of dressing, at any time. The thrill of flying enfemme or catching some other transport.
      The range and style of clothing means anytime is a great time.
      Now there is more acceptance getting around is a little easier.
      You know this so a big welcome and continue to live life.
      Best Wishes
      Jane

    • #634833
      Sandy Honey
      Lady
      Registered On: February 24, 2021
      Topics: 24
      Replies: 474
      Has thanked: 312 times
      Been thanked: 2464 times

      Does the urge/desire to be Sandy go away…for me No. I find it is growing stronger as I get older. It was something I hid while married but now divorced for over 14 years it came back stronger than ever. I love wearing feminine beautiful clothes. I find that I’m calmer and happier when I slip on a skirt or dress. I’m happier being Sandy than my alter ego male self.

      Sandy

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