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    • #559170

      I am married, came out to my wife as a CD more than a year ago. It didn’t go as well as I hoped but I am seeing progress with her acceptance. As we both agree that I don’t CD in front of her (or the kids) and she doesn’t participate in any way, we both agree I need outlets. I am being fully transparent with her, even if it requires me to ask for uncomfortable questions about her level of comfort about what I do: full makeup sessions with a professional, out shopping for my femme self, etc. She knows I might want to get out en femme in public, and I know that scares her (for my safety).

      I have had two awesome transformations with a great makeup artist (cis woman) who I know she’s comfortable around me. I also met online a trans woman online who suggested we go shopping together.

      Hence, my question: is friendship between a married CD and a women (cis or trans) possible? I mean, I know it’s possible, but do you think that a wife would oppose to that in our situation (e.g., jealousy) ?

      I am curious to hear about your experiences. Thanks for your advice.

      Chloé

    • #559190
      Caty Ryan
      Baroness

      I have had the wonderful experience of telling a very dear cis woman friend of mine about Caty about 30 years ago. She hardly batted an eyelid, (Not that I saw her do it, she was in Eastern Canada and I was down her in Oz when i!t “all came out!

      From a very early stage in our friendship we became like very close sister and brother. Mainly cos neither of us has one of the opposite gender.

      We both had serious respective relationship difficulties back then and were a constant support for each other “across the miles”. I would go and stay wiht her half way through my business trips to Canada and altho’ there were times when “something might have happened”, it did not.

      We are both well into our 70’s now and sadly no more “face to face”.But the emails and occasional phone call still occur

      With the “others” I could name at least six women, who over the years, knew about Caty and did not turn a hair. The fact that I became friends with them was due to the fact I bought lingerie and/or had professional makeovers with them. One of them is pre op trans.

      I put it all down to my “femme side”. I have always found it easy to relate to and make friends with cis women. Just as comfy with the “blokes”,….. mind

      In terms of my home situation, my ex wife hated my CDing with a passion and my current loving partner, “knows but does not want to know”.

      Which is why I’m sitting in my comfy 10ft sq storage unit fully dressed as “Mother of The Bride” and thoroughly enjoying myself.

      Its usually on overnight charity volunteer trips, but we’ve been in lockdown since July, so the only place I can be Caty in private is the  above.

      Happy dressing one and all

      Caty

      PS I forgot these two….Roughly about the same time as I got to know my “Canadian sister”, I also became quite close to another lady from Perth Western, Australia. We had much in common, but again sadly, relationship difficulties in our respective marriages, was another reason “on top”. More first close cousin” than brother/ sister as per above

      I told her face to face one night and she did not mind at all. Said she’d even help with make up etc if we were ever able to arrange same. This never eventuated and we gradually lost touch. Back in touch again now, but infrequently.

      The other one is an ex business associate from the UK. She never knew about Caty, but her and her hubby had me stay with them on many occasions whilst on one of my trips to the UK.

      I still keep in email touch with her.

       

       

       

       

       

       

      • This reply was modified 2 years ago by Caty Ryan.
    • #559191
      Peta Mari
      Lady

      What does your wife say? Personally, I keep my cding private. I don’t meet up with other cds.

      I don’t have that need. But that works for me.

      • #559412
        Krissy
        Lady

        Not married anymore and prefer the company of girls like us or bio woman. Slowly starting to dislike the male world 🌎

    • #559225
      Anonymous
      Lady

      Chloe I will first start by saying in my humble opinion it is a matter that absolutely must be in agreement with your wife and everything above board and open. I have seen friendships develop in unhealthy directions when things at home are not as desired. I do believe it is possible as I have a gg friend, but if there are ever any conversations that have any topics or tones you would not have with or in front if your SO then it is time for a serious evaluation of where the friendship is going. Take care.
      🍷C

    • #559236
      Stevie Steiner
      Managing Ambassador

      Hi Chloé.  As a disclaimer I must say I am not married, but in general I would hope that friendship is always possible between two people, regardless of sex, gender, or how we identify.   Something more than friendship would be inappropriate of course.  A jealousy factor?  Frankly like with any couple that would depend on how secure the two of you are in your relationship.  Certainly it’s possible however – and I’m sure a great benefit having  too!

      Stevie

    • #559305
      Kelly Lee
      Duchess - Annual

      As other say, friendship is always possible. In this setting it may be a “strange” interest that is common between you but how would your wife react if you – in male mode – became friendly with the single women down the street? The issue may be when the friendship gone to far and where that line is depends on many things. If you say “hi” when passing her house and she is outside it’s probably ok. If you say you need to sleep on her sofa because she is afraid to sleep alone it’s probably gone to far.

      Personally I have a simple test, if I feel that I can tell my wife everything (and I mean -everything-) we done or talked about without hiding anything or making her jealous it’s probably not to far.

      /kt

    • #559320
      Anonymous

      I have a number of CD friends I go out with.  My wife is totally cool with it as long as it doesn’t take up too much of my time.

    • #559329
      Barb Wire
      Lady

      Hi Chloe:

      I think you’re specifically asking about going out as a CD with another woman?

      I have not met up with another women as a CD nor am I likely to. However, I’d certainly go out with a group of CDs and gals for a night out! Las Vegas is SO on my “to do list”!

      However, I have gone out with one of my best girlfriends as a guy and it’s often been just the two of us! So, in this regard, an emphatic YES!

      My girlfriend and I have had the same occupation and still have the same hobbies. My SO and her are good friends too! In fact, our girlfriend taught us how to xc ski for the first time and it was a bent-over hoot! (Let me rephrase: “we had lots of laughs) 🙂

      xo Barb :B

       

    • #559334

      Hi Chloe Friendships between Married CDs and any single woman cis or trans or even another CD  would first have to meet with my wife and she would do what most woman would do. Talk and get a get a feeling if she is friend or competition she may have to deal with.  My wife is very open minded but very attuned to any other woman cis,trans or CD that may express any interest she claims as hers. She went to several of my club CD meetings and she took the time to speak with most people including accepting wives. She made mental notes who was single and she thought who were looking for potential mates. She would ask on our drive home what I thought of of this person or that person and she would always say she felt some presented very well as a woman even considered them attractive and ask if i felt the same. She a very kind empathetic, feminine woman. But very territorial when it comes to her man You call it jealous or intimidated or what ever. That is one of the things that had to be worked out in our marriage. Stephanie was not going to interfere in our marriage. Until she felt Stephanie and I were one in the same and she could trust me again after finding my clothes. You call it what you want jealousy, being protective  No one will come between her and her man   . Just a few thoughts

      Luv Always Stephanie

    • #559409

      I’m gonna flip this. I’m single and most of my female friends are married or in a relationship. As I’m very open about my dressing their SO’s don’t see me as a threat. Oh gawd, if they only knew. But I would NEVER make a move on some one already in a relationship. It’s tough sometimes. One is sooo adorable.

      Be safe. Love and Peaace.

      Amber

    • #559507
      Pumped
      Lady

      It depends on your wife, and your friends.

      My wife would not allow it, as I would not allow her to got hang out with a guy. On the other hand we don’t worry about it as we honor each other’s limits. I would not hang out with another woman, CD or male mode. I haven’t had the opportunity, but I would not hang out alone with another CD’er either.

      IMO, it is just asking for trouble. Next thing you know you are having more fun and spending more time with the friend then your wife and the marriage gets rocky.

      Kind of related, but I had a gay friend hit on me. He knew I was married. We sat and talked for a bit and I told him I was not going to jeopardize my marriage, gave him a hug and was never alone with him again.

    • #559703

      Interesting responses. My wife and I “let” each other be friends with anyone we become friends with (gender doesn’t play into it at all). I wouldn’t think of telling my wife she couldn’t be friends with a guy and she doesn’t question anything about me and a woman being friends.

      To do otherwise seems overbearing and controlling to me.

    • #559753

      I don’t see why not. I have female friends and my wife has male friends. But if we were going shopping she would most certainly want to come with. She likes to critique my purchases and knows I don’t go anywhere without eating out.

    • #559759

      Chloe,

      My wife didn’t want anything to do with my crossdressing and she would have objected to me having a woman friend that did accept my CDing, but that was my situation. Have you told your wife about this other woman?

      Sherri

    • #563980
      Prudence
      Ambassador

      Hi Chloe! It can be. My situation was a little different. I’m single, and I had a GG friend who is married. Her Hubby had some insecurities. We dont get to hang out anymore. I miss that Girl! I hope things work out for you!!   Hugs Pru

    • #564665

      I’m certainly no expert, but I personally think it can work. Heard the argument that some women see a crossdresser as someone who’s unlikely to make a move for their man. Think it depends on the individuals and the situation. That’s my theory.

    • #565034

      [postquote quote=563980]

      Prudence,

      Presently, I’m in a similar position that your were in. I’m a single widower and good friends with a woman who is accepting of my CDing and we sometimes “play” dress up together. She’s married and he’s insecure and uptight and probably doesn’t want her to hang out with me, but she’s a free spirit and does what she wants. I really look forward to spending time and dressing with her! I’m not sure where this is headed and it very well might end up like your friendship with that woman. It’s a thing I want to keep on going though. After CDing by myself for most of my life, it’s nice to have a woman friend who accepts it and wants me to share with her! Playing dress up with her is one of the most wonderful things to ever happen in my life!

      • #569601

        I finally got the nerve up to ask my lady friend if she wanted to domme  me and she agreed! I’m not going to get into the details here of this new aspect of our relationship because of TMI 🙂 , but for the first time in my life I’m involved with a woman who fully accepts me being a crossdresser and now being dommed by her is mind blowing, I’m so happy!

    • #565038
      Anonymous

      The real question is Is it possible for a married guy (CD or not) to have a friend relationship with another woman? Possible? Yes, but uncommon. Spouses tend to be jealous of such relationships – and it cuts both ways.
      I have two such relationships in my married life – but both were also my wife’s friends.

      Hugs,
      Lulu

    • #563977

      I certainly wouldn’t cheat on my wife. She suffered a very bad marriage from her 1st husband. If I did go out with anybody it would purely be a platonic relationship. I can honestly say my wife wouldn’t cheat on me, so I wouldn’t do it to her. Not saying I wouldn’t be tempted, because that can easily happen

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