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Hey girls.
So my wife has expressed what seems to me the very reasonable concern that she feels like she is losing her man.
She wants me to be more of the man I used to be and less of Elisa.
This seems very reasonable to me. And if I were home more, that is exactly what I would do. But it is still difficult to keep Elisa in check, even though I love my wife very much.
If you don’t mind, please tell me if you feel (or have felt) the same way my wife does and if you and your SO have worked out something that helps you get the man you need.
Do you feel like you lost something when he started expressing himself in feminine ways?
Thanks.
Eileen, I’m so thankful for your responses. You sometimes seem like the only GG we have!
That makes your input EXTRA special.
🙂
It is different for every situation. However I don’t feel like I lost anything. I gained a best friend and a person who is happier than she was before. Misty still has the same beautiful heart she had before. The only difference is the outside view changed. I love everything about her. And as far as being macho or alpha, let someone try to hurt or upset me. I have no doubt she would tell them what for as only a southern woman could. Also if need be she can and would turn into “she-hulk”
Hi there !
So your situation is of course dependent on people and relationships but i wanted to comment because i deeply relate to it.
I too found myself missing the “male entity” to my partner when he began dressing up infront of me and expressed this to him, being very abrupt and stating that i “struggled to still see him as a man”. Currently i am suffering with an ear infection and was not in the mood to do a thing this morning. My partner graciously went to the store for our groceries and when he came back he fried up some sausages for us to eat. When he brought me the food he was smiling from ear to ear and after kept asking if i enjoyed it. My point in all of this is that i didnt fall in love with him because he was manly, i fell in love with him because of how big his heart is.
My best advice would be to just handle your SO with safety gloves at this time. Having said words similar to hers im not defending hers or my own, it was a moment of doubt and its something that you have to actively work on in your relationship. For some in this situation, prior intimate emotions feel at risk. She needs to know that youre still the man she always knew and you need to know that that might take some time for her to fully come to terms with.Thanks again, Eileen.
That’s pretty much me too. Not that I don’t have a beer now and then. 🙂
A lot of CDs have some kind of deep need to connect to the feminine in an intimate way; we want it close to us. Closer than even our SO can bring it to us sometimes.
Like your husband, I’m 100% man. I just feel a deep connection (and a desire to stay to close to) the feminine. I think it has something to do with my childhood and of course the culture we live in today.
A pastor friend of mine teaches often about “father hunger” seen in various cultural problems we face today. I think “mother hunger” is probably there too.
Thanks again.
Thank you, Rita.
That makes sense. I am trying to more sensitive to what SHE needs and not what I need.
Finding the best balance in that is difficult. I think it is appropriate for a husband to give up more than his wife, to sacrifice more of himself for her than she does for him.
Marriage requires compromise, and compromise means sacrifice.
Thanks again.
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