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  • #468023
    stephanie plumb
    Participant
    Registered On: November 17, 2018
    Topics: 146
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    Is it just me?  Or is it a common issue?

    To sit like a lady when wearing a short skirt you have four choices –  1) Sit with knees and legs firmly pressed together all the way down.   2) Sit with knees pressed together but feet splayed out a little to the side.  3) Sit with knees pressed together and legs bent, one with foot flat on the ground, and the other leg bent backwards behind you. 4)  Cross one leg over the other on top of the knee.

    There are probably other variations, but note the main point – the knees must be firmly pressed together, otherwise you are going to be showing your panties (if you are wearing any.)  Or, well, only you know what else will be on display.  So – “Mind the gap.”

    Alternatively you can man-spread  i.e. your knees are not together wherever else your legs might be.  Legs crossed at ankles is one such position. Try it …. I can see your …..  Ooeer!  Unfortunately one can’t unsee that which was seen!    It is impossible to “close the gap.”  I see an awful lot of women (including pics here on CDH) where they are sitting in a manly posture, often legs akimbo! One could drive a dumper truck “up there.”

    Back now to the problem I have.  If I sit in position no 1). – legs and knees firmly pressed together, I can’t maintain it for more than a few minutes. I can feel the pressure in my thighs that becomes increasingly uncomfortable, and eventually muscle trembles make it unbearable – and flash it them I must!  Positions 2) and 3) are easier but they too eventually become unbearable.  I can only indefinitely maintain pose no 4) – crossed legs – and so protect my modesty.

    I assume it’s to do with the differences in male and female pelvic anatomy. A woman’s pelvis is proportionally wider so her legs angle inwards slightly when she has her knees together.  We have to force ours together.  Knees together just isn’t in our repertoire.  Practice plays a part in this. Presumably I couldn train my legs to hold this position, but it won’t be easy.

    So, back to the question – Is it just me? Or do you have the same (or similar) problem?

    kneetrembler, Stephanie P xx

Viewing 14 reply threads
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    • #468724
      Kathleen 60454
      Lady
      Registered On: January 8, 2020
      Topics: 44
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      Well positions. 1 and 2 are very uncomfortable  for me. Position 4,  I would love to do but my boy parts get in the way and get squashed and it hurts after a very few seconds.  Therefore  my ladylike Position is Position 3.

      Kathleen

       

       

      2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #468544
      Robin Snow
      Lady
      Registered On: May 7, 2019
      Topics: 19
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      Hi Stephanie,

      I have the same issue.  My knees just don’t want to stay together.   Even when I try to curl up my legs on the couch.  I find it most comfortable to sit with my legs crossed at the knee.  I find when I do this my knee seems awfully high, especially in heels.  From watching GG’s, I learned to either push the bottom leg back, slide it to the side, or both.

      I try to stay flexible by doing a lot of stretching but there is only so much flexibility left in this body.

      Robin

      3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #468535
      Jannie Murry
      Lady
      Registered On: October 15, 2019
      Topics: 0
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      Hi Stephanie. I was wondering when someone would address this topic,? My question is  How do you enter or exit the drivers side of a car wearing a short little skirt without showing the world what color panties you are?. I finally found out that if keep your knees together and swing both of my legs out of the car, there’s very little chance that I am going to show my panties to whoever is looking at me. It’s not the most comfortable thing to do, but it assures that your legs stay closed. Do you have any other suggestions on how to get in and out of a car so that you will look like a girl?? I’d love to hear about your advice on this

      Hugs to you

      Janine

       

       

       

       

      1 user thanked author for this post.
    • #468394
      LisaT
      Lady
      Registered On: January 31, 2021
      Topics: 41
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      Stephanie.

      I read this and just didn’t know. I’ve never thought about it so assumed I’m probably flashing all the time.

      Wrong

      She who must be obeyed says I sit mostly with my ankles crossed and always have done, even in male mode and pre Lisa. She also says that I forget that I have two dogs who love to jump up on my lap so seating positions get a little contorted anyway.

      In addition I’m a lounger. I love to remove socks and tuck my feet up on the settee or my recliner and semi curl up when I’m relaxing. Reflecting it’s quite demure.

      So. I guess I’m not only quite girly but I always have been. Isn’t that a surprise.

      Hugs

      Lisa xxx

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #468227
      Inga Krasivaya
      Lady
      Registered On: January 18, 2021
      Topics: 16
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      Hiya, Steph:  a very interesting point.  Must admit that my own preference is to keep my knees together (yup – there’s really no choice on that one!) then bend both legs to the same side and keep them there… which tends to hurt like hell before long.  What I can never understand is how come some folk (usually a GG) can manage to cross their legs above the knee; how uncomfortable can you get?  You’re totally right about GGs tending to have wider hips (an evolutionary necessity regarding childbirth) but a lot of us CDs seem to be able to do it; is this just Mother Nature telling me that I need to lose a lot, lot more weight?  Still Overweight Inga…

    • #468194
      Vanessa ?
      Lady
      Registered On: September 26, 2020
      Topics: 5
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      Me personally, I’ve never had much difficulty sitting with my knees close together.  Either with legs tucked back a bit under the chair or legs crossed at the ankles, I can keep my knees either touching or within an inch of touching without any problem.

      I don’t “spread” much at all when sitting even when I’m in guy-mode.  My usual then is to sit with legs crossed (if on the ground or a similarly flat surface) or with one leg crossed over the other, though not in the standard feminine way.  My legs are slightly apart when I sit that way, but not to the extent that panties would be visible unless I had on a very short skirt.  And I lean toward longer flowy skirts and dresses so accidentally giving observers a panty-shot is not really a problem I’d have to worry about much haha.

      So I’d have to say some people really do have their anatomy (maybe pelvic bones and such?) set up in such a way that makes it harder or easier for them to sit in certain positions… but it’s not an easy “biologically male vs. biologically female” divide to make, there are people who fall into one category whose sitting ability is closer to the other.

      • This reply was modified 3 weeks ago by Vanessa ?.
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    • #468191
      Amanda Burton
      Baroness - Annual
      Registered On: January 15, 2020
      Topics: 26
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      Well I cross at the knee, also sit with one leg tucked under the other ie on the settee. Or both legs together at a 45%angle. Can’t see how these tucking devices make for pleasant sitting. 

      5 users thanked author for this post.
    • #468162
      Stevie Steiner
      Ambassador
      Registered On: June 11, 2020
      Topics: 47
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      ….. Hi, my name is Stevie… and I’ve been a crosslegger since my teens….  Left over right above the knee, for as long as I can remember.  😊

       

    • #468155
      Paula F
      Duchess
      Registered On: August 7, 2019
      Topics: 13
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      Stephanie, I have spent a very long time learning to sit in a mini (NOT a Cooper, btw) and not let anyone share in family secrets.  When younger, the ‘Europen leg cross’ worked best for me, until mild damage to my knees finally accumulated to make that uncomfortable after very long.

      A comfortable position I have found is to sit in the chair all the way back, body and legs turned approximately 45 deg, knees together, then place the foot of the inside leg slightly in front of you other foot.  Don’t know about other girls legs, but this actually helps press my thighs together, and is not uncomfortable like other positions.

      When I was with my first boyfriend Vincent, he and I  both loved me in short skirts and mini’s.  He worked with me diligently to correct my sitting without showing postures.  His best advice to me in gapping a mini was:”I you are going to let a man see your pretty panties, at least get a nice dinner and a bottle of wine first.”

      PaulaF

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    • #468146
      Bridgette VonSmirff
      Lady
      Registered On: October 18, 2020
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      I’ve been teaching myself to cross legs at the knee. Used to be easier when I was thinner!

      Bridgette

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    • #468130
      Krista
      Duchess
      Registered On: January 24, 2017
      Topics: 8
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      Hi Stephanie – I was surprised when you wrote that crossing the ankles was a manly way of sitting, so of course I had to Google it.  I went to a lady’s etiquette site and copied the text – see below.

      Hope this helps.   Hugs, Krista.

      “Here are the two only acceptable ways we feel a woman should sit in public. Crossing the feet at the ankles is the loveliest and most noble way to sit, as long as you don’t let you arches drop. You should aim to have your toes and knees form a straight line. Position your legs at a slight angle, as to avoid looking too boyish. This method does necessitate more delicate inner thigh muscle development though, but it is truly worth it.

      The most popular sitting technique for a woman is the European leg cross, which requires placing one knee on top of the other. While this position is perfectly acceptable, do note that it encourages bad posture and could potentially also trigger the formation of spider veins.

      Regardless of the sitting position that you choose, it is imperative that you keep your back straighthead up and shoulders down – all the while being relaxed. Avoid looking too tense, as you want to put people at ease, and always keep your hands placed on your thigh. All you need is a bit of practice!

      And Remember:

      • Always smile and be graceful
      • Don’t Sit with your feet and knees side by side
      • Don’t Fidget. It’s best to stay still and focused
      • Don’t Slouch: You’re a lady, not a child
      • Don’t hang your arms over the back of your chair
      • If your legs are heavy, always cross them at the ankles and not at the knees
      • This reply was modified 3 weeks ago by Krista.
      • #468390
        stephanie plumb
        Baroness - Annual
        Registered On: November 17, 2018
        Topics: 146
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        Thank you Inga for taking the trouble to help.  I suspect your article was written pre the short mini-skirt era.

        The ankle cross is a pose used by both sexes I admit. It is a male typical pose that we obviously find comfortable because we do it all the time.  Etiquette is correct if its done in the way the article points out – but that’s not how a man does it – and neither do most women.  No, they just cross at the ankle and unless you have excellent muscle control your knees relax to about 12″ apart!  Try it!

        Very ladylike! Isn’t it?  Time and time again I have observed women sitting like this.  Women have hi-jacked man-spreading!  This position in a short skirt is a favourite of up-skirters!

        Hugs

        Steph xx

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        • #468489
          Krista
          Duchess
          Registered On: January 24, 2017
          Topics: 8
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          Hi Stephanie, You called me Inga?????  That was my Mom’s name; how did you know?

          Anyway back to sitting.  You are right with your assumption, our bodies must be quite different (probably something to do with the angle of the hips).  I find sitting with my ankles crossed underneath my chair very comfortable.  My knees are only two inches apart at most and I find that my hands automatically want to fall onto my lap when I’m sitting up straight, head up.  This is how I’m sitting right now and typing.  It is also better for your typing style.  I took typing in High School many, many years ago (only two guys in a class full of young ladies) and I type around 60 words per minute so I could be someone’s secretary if needed.

          You are correct that the knees come apart when one slouches back into the chair, so no slouching girlfriend.  Unless one wants their panties to be a bit visible.  Each to their own.

          Stay safe, stay healthy, All the best, oh I’m going to my appointment for my COVID shot in a few hours. Yahoo.  Hugs, Krista.

          4 users thanked author for this post.
          • #468517
            stephanie plumb
            Baroness - Annual
            Registered On: November 17, 2018
            Topics: 146
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            Ooops! Sorry!  Doh! “There’s nae feel like an auld feel” – as they say in Scotland. I just got the name wrong.  A midnight blonde moment.   We do have an Inga on this site as you know.

            Hope your shot went okay, and any after effects are minimal.  I had slight tenderness at the injection site for a couple of days.  You are supposed to get a reaction – it proves your immune system has kicked in.

            Stay safe and well, hugs , Steph  xx

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      • #468294
        James Brine
        Lady
        Registered On: October 13, 2020
        Topics: 15
        Replies: 77
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        Something about this etiquette post just reminds me of Mary Poppins. Not good or bad, just reminds me of her.

        3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #468093
      Beth Green
      Lady
      Registered On: February 24, 2021
      Topics: 12
      Replies: 177
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      You are absolutely correct about our inability to naturally hold our knees together or cross our legs for any length of time. Our hips don’t work that way. Crossing at the ankle but with knees still tight is the least uncomfortable but in order to sport a nice short skirt we must endure.

      Note the Royals. Crossing the legs is forbidden for a Lady but they are born and raised that way so it is natural for them. We, on the other hand, were born as men, unfortunately, i.e. slobs. Only a lot of uncomfortable practice or abandonment of short skirts (NO, NEVER, UH UH, NOT) will make us demure ladies.

      In the meantime we will reveal some thigh or panties. Just make sure they are sexy pretty.

      👗❤

      Beth

      • #468110
        stephanie plumb
        Baroness - Annual
        Registered On: November 17, 2018
        Topics: 146
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        Thanks Beth.  Sitting with legs crossed at the ankle is taboo. It is in the list of man-spreading postures. There is a tendency for the knees to move apart , opening up the scenery to all and sundry.  So crossing the legs with one knee on top of the other is the least uncomfortable, and most modest way.   Too many women forget they have changed out of their pants and sit as if they were still wearing them.   So women have not only hi-jacked pants, they are now hi-jacking man-spreading postures too!

        Stephanie xx

        • #468120
          Beth Green
          Lady
          Registered On: February 24, 2021
          Topics: 12
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          Yes, daily it becomes more apparent that women are abandoning femininity. The androgynization of the sexes.😤 As a subset of femininity we cd’s must pick up the banner of women and march on. (Oh, there I go again, writing speeches!😇)

          Beth

    • #468063
      Grace Scarlett
      Baroness - Annual
      Registered On: February 16, 2021
      Topics: 51
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      Stephanie….

      I think I prefer number 3…

      Sit with knees pressed together and legs bent, one with foot flat on the ground, and the other leg bent backwards behind you “..

      It’s very comfy..

      I just can’t understand why my car keeps mounting the pavement!!!

      Just like to say, with all that scaffolding, rubber and ribbon used for tucking…..just maybe position number 5 should be called ” the Squash”!!!

      out of control, grace ❤️❤️

       

       

      • #468103
        stephanie plumb
        Baroness - Annual
        Registered On: November 17, 2018
        Topics: 146
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        Yes…. but do you get a kneetrembler if you keep your knees pressed together!

        With either one of Rei’s tucking  contraptions or a “gaff with hiding tube”  it doesn’t matter about being ladylike. With all that lot in place it will be impossible to shut your legs anyway.   All anyone will get is a glimpse of metal rings, tubes, gaffer tape, pantyhose and ribbons!  Not a turkey, or anything else in sight!

        Your car mounts the pavement?   Its not a Volvo is it?  2poos mounts her Teddy Bear – apparently its not sexual.

        modestly, Steph xx

        4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #468045
      Effie Fulk
      Duchess
      Registered On: February 7, 2021
      Topics: 21
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      As I practice sitting like a lady, I know what you mean Stephanie! 🦋🧚‍♀️ It’s difficult to maintain a basic knees pressed together, for a long period of time..🌼 so crossing the legs at the knee is easier, but if the skirt is extra short, well, there will still be a good bit of upper thigh showing 😅

      🦋🎀🧚‍♀️

       

    • #468034
      Bettylou Cox
      Duchess
      Registered On: May 26, 2019
      Topics: 19
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      I hadn’t thought about this subject before; I naturally cross my legs when I sit, even in guy mode. But sitting with legs uncrossed and leg muscles relaxed, the “manspread” is the natural position. So I would say, no, it’s not just you, and unless you at least cross your ankles or avoid short skirts, you are going to show your panties.

      Hugs,
      Bettylou

      • #468114
        stephanie plumb
        Baroness - Annual
        Registered On: November 17, 2018
        Topics: 146
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        I can’t possibly avoid short skirts. And I refuse to cross my legs at the ankles ; that is a man-spreading pose.  Cross at the knee it will have to be.   But I will ensure I am wearing pretty panties.

        Hugs, Stephanie

        5 users thanked author for this post.
        • #468244
          Bettylou Cox
          Duchess
          Registered On: May 26, 2019
          Topics: 19
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          IMO, a girl should always wear pretty panties; it’s a morale booster, whether they’re seen or not.

          Hugs,
          Bettylou

          2 users thanked author for this post.
    • #468111
      stephanie plumb
      Baroness - Annual
      Registered On: November 17, 2018
      Topics: 146
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      Are you sure I can’t persuade you to reveal all?

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