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    • #603173

      One of the most back handed compliments I ever received was that I have a ‘distinctive face’, my real life nickname is also derived from my looks. I like the name though, all my friends know me by it. And don’t get me wrong, there are no people pointing at me in the street (in drab obv).
      The problem is, as much as I love wearing my new clothes I can’t abide the sight of myself in the mirror. It’s a source of great embarrassment to me but as long as I don’t look I feel great.
      Wearing a long wig helps, and though I’m not nearly ready to wear makeup I know I’ll be working with a dodgy canvass. C’est la vie.

    • #603176
      Tara Ryan
      Lady

      Hi Amy,

      I think a lot of us have been where you are.  It takes time to develop a look (or looks) that we are happy with, often we are own worst critics.  My advice is try and enjoy the journey, they are so many nice clothes out there to try, you will then be able to decide what suits you.  When you are ready to move on to make up, I would look at going to a dressing service or a make up professional, there are lots of tips to take on board when it comes to make up and also advice about shading, foundation and the range of make up techniques out there.  YouTube is also a good place to start learning about make up.

      Just have fun, this is a journey and it is about small steps, eventually you will arrive at where you want to be.

      Love,

      Tara x.

       

       

    • #603194
      Anonymous
      Lady

      We are our worst critics and perfection doesn’t exist in our universe or at least not in my world. Its a constant struggle to get things “right” so don’t worry it will come in time through trial and error… with lots of error. Its important to achieve some level of confidence in yourself whatever that level is. Its not easy being a CD but its thrilling, fun as all h@ll, and a never ending journey.

      • #603196

        I’m beginning to realise that. It will be interesting to see where I’m at by the end of the year.

    • #603206
      ChloeC
      Duchess

      Hi Amy,  I can understand a little.  Mirrors themselves don’t bother me that much (although I really don’t want to look at myself too long). It’s photos of myself that I absolutely cannot stand.  I mean, there have only been a very select few of me in drab that I’ve looked at just after they were taken (either from instant, cameraphone, or just back from the drugstore…ages me, doesn’t it), or even years later that I can even peek at without feeling embarrassed.  I just don’t photograph well…in male drab.  Now dressed! I actually like a few of those somewhat better.

      I will mention (as I did a time ago) that I had a semiprofessional photographer friend of mine take portraits of me back in college and I actually liked them. I had wallet copies made (for a cost), and within a week, they were all demanded of me from women friends on campus…and the daughter of one of my profs. And that was the exception that proved the rule.

      I mean, for most the rest of my photos I would have been too embarrassed to even pay people to take them.

      Hugs, CloeC

      • This reply was modified 2 years ago by ChloeC.
      • #603209

        I think I’ve been trying to do too much too soon. I’m going to have to slow down and take things step by step. And not aim for the unattainable. x

    • #603219
      Brielle
      Lady

      Hi Amy, you have the key – do what makes you feel whole. I didn’t shave body hair until recently, and felt I wasn’t able to be free (going out, etc.). It used to bother me a bit, so I just focused on the rest of my presentation and tried to ignore it.

      If looking in the mirror is an issue, then just don’t – once you get the wig set right (giggle). I hope I’m not speaking out of turn, but if you are not happy with your image in the mirror and makeup isn’t an option to enhance your experience, I have a suggestion. What about a lifelike silicone mask? They can be pretty pricy, but the better ones really do look realistic. I have no idea about comfort, but for short stints and photo sessions, it may give you added benefit. Maybe some other girls on the site have experience with them.

      Anyway, just a thought. You are beautiful inside and out just as you are, GF.

      Hugs and kisses,

      Brielle

      • #603224

        Cost is an issue at the moment, I’ve already spent too much since the flood gates opened! Calming down now. x

        • #603240
          Brielle
          Lady

          I definitely understand that, GF! I really like Andrea’s reply. She is so right, that over time you will like Amy the more you spend with her. Just like any loving relationship, physical attributes that will change over time aren’t what draws you to someone so much as how you enjoy each other’s company.

    • #603237

      Amy, the trick is time………. As time goes on you will ‘grow into Amy’…….. By that I mean you will accept yourself, you will find ways of changing your appearance with makeup and wigs and you will begin to become the woman of your dreams. I used to look in the mirror and think I look like a bloke in a dress and would never be able to go out into the world, but given time, that changed and now I have no worries about going out for a meal, shopping or a day out. Take your time it will happen, ok it will take work, learning different makeup techniques and finding what works for you, but you will get there, trust me, I know!……………..

      • #603242

        Thankyou, Andrea. Yes, I’m very much at the ‘bloke in a dress’ stage and with no idea how far this will take me. This is all very new, but for the most part I’m enjoying the journey.

    • #603241

      More support coming your way. I’ve been there and still am there to some degree. Your look should be ever changing. Be adventurous and incrementally try new things. I encourage you to find a local makeup artist. I messaged several in my home town and told them up front who I am (well, not my real name) and attached a couple pics of the makeup look I was trying to achieve. Several did not respond, but one did. My time with her and was very instructional and worth the cost, time and effort.

      Find your way, enjoy and adventure.

      • This reply was modified 2 years ago by Ciao Topaz.
    • #603274
      Angela Booth
      Hostess

      Mirror Mirror, On the wall – Why are you laughing???

      You have the canvas and that’s the start Amy. As the girls have said already — we have all been there. It takes time to sort out the paint, crafting out the flaws and creating the finished article. It is doable for all of us. Take your time and never be afraid to ask here.

       

    • #603279

      For me personally: The feeling of being her is more important than what she looks like in the mirror.

    • #615213
      Anonymous

      Hey Amy, I m very much the same. I was once told I have a handsome face as it speaks volumes…hmmmm, should I be worried lol? I have a classic square face, very male, and well weathered thanks to my work grrrrrr, but my body is more female. Small feet, tiny ankles, for a male form, basically everything is Ash apart from my face lolol. As for make up, hmmmmm, I ve not really managed to perfect that yet. OK ish with eye liner, so long as I don t poke myself in the eye and lipstick is ok but thats about it. I did do a full make up and dress one day, BUT IT TOOK ALLLLLLL DAY lol. So yup, can understand your musings. xx

    • #615379

      Let me tell you, if you are still young do not waste those wonderful youthful years procrastinating. Make-up can work wonders and you may be shocked at how feminine you look once you get to know how to do it right.

      I was fortunate to be very passable in my younger years and I regret not taking better advantage of it when I had the chance.  I don’t feel I can pull off that young girl appearance that I once was able to anymore.

      I find it very frustrating that those days are gone. I’m thankful I still have my girly figure. The best I can do today to keep those girly feeling live is I make many videos of myself while dressed but shoot them from behind. I watch them and can still visualize how girly I once looked. I so wish I would have taken more pictures and made more videos when I was proud of my feminine appearance.

    • #615610
      MelanieElizabeth
      Ambassador

      Amy I think we have all been where you are with our reflections. I have a love/hate relationship with my mirror at times, especially before I started experimenting with makeup. I used to love dressing simply for the feeling of it, but using makeup really has helped me to get to a better place in a couple of ways. First thing, looking our best in drab or en femme makes us feel better about ourselves. Makeup will help you accomplish a more femme appearance. Fully dressing with makeup and wig was a game changer for me. Not because I thought I looked beautiful(quite the contrary actually) but because seeing that pseudo female looking back at me  made this “hobby” make more sense to me. I used to feel so silly looking at myself in the mirror but now I look forward to it. It’s kind of a payoff for the work and guilt I’ve put myself through over the years. As I improve my appearance with practice the better I feel about myself and what I’m doing. That’s my take on it Amy but you be you and just enjoy yourself!

    • #616148

      Hi amy, looks can be important, but if you contentment, and a loving and caring nature that is everything. You certainly rock the planet, so do what you love.

      Best wishes
      Jane Stewart

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