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Hi all and I’m happy to say I did it , Last Wednesday was my first time ever being out in public. I went to a beautiful gathering of ladies who meet for a fun pub night in Toronto . Some of our gals who reside here were there and was so exciting to meet in person ladies like myself who made me feel most welcome . Stories that I have read from others and have only dream of doing . Highly charged and a very emotionally experience, truly a nervous time . The feeling of standing there with others fully dressed as a woman . the shivering of emotions running through ever part of my body , my heart beating so hard. And yet the calmness and warmness I felt from everyone there revealed a confinance inside me and soon I enjoyed a night of memories . I must mention a special lady who help in many ways . Josie your wonderful and beautiful in taking my hand and leading me to this wonderful time. With many of our ladies here at Cdh and their love and support one never knows where a path my lead. Were all moving forward in our love of womanhood. I just wanted to share this for the next soul whos dream may become reality. thankyou all……….. Stephanie………
Thanks, Stephanie – that must have felt beyond wonderful!
To go out alone is quite scary, but a real thrill, and a life-affirming experience, but to share the experience with others magnifies it many times!
In the past few weeks I have learned that we not only can, but should be everything we have the potential to be, that we should set goals and do our best to achieve them – and above everything, share the love, because dressing fills me up with so much love it feels like I’m erupting with it – don’t let it go to waste!!
I’ve seen so many smiles on people’s faces as they see me and see through the makeup, clothes and wig – seems people really accept this form of self expression nowadays.
If I can put a smile on someone’s face, then the performance artist in me is satisfied – the performance is ultimately about making the audience feel good, or at least making a connection that registers in their hearts.
The ultimate goal is to make audience and performers feel like one entity, so your experience at the club must’ve felt like that – both a performer and part of an audience, all performing.
Enough of my rambling – I’m on cloud 9 currently, and stories like this only serve to lift me higher.
Thanks again!
Love
Laura
Well done, such an enjoying time for you!
Lisa
Going out for the 1st time is a big step. The first time I went out was in 1978 to a private house. I was afraid but I knew I wanted to do it. There was a place to change and do your makeup. I got dressed and sat at the bar that was in the middle of a large living room. Another girl sat next to me. I said hi and she said the same. We were both nervous. We started talking and after a while, I felt so relaxed. I felt like I was talking to myself. I felt like she was reading my mind. I said to myself that there was a person just like me. I no longer felt alone. That was a long time ago, but I feel like it was yesterday. Over the years I have been out to many places. I have met other girls like myself from all over the world. The feeling of meeting others just like yourself is the best therapy.
Yours Terri
Stephanie,
Thank you for a very memorable evening! It was truly my pleasure (not just saying that) to have walked with you down Gerrard & Wellesley Streets, past other ordinary people in their every day lives. We were not dressed like them and we are not ordinary people! We are extraordinary people seeking out and living our inner most feelings!
The pub was full of us girls and it was nice to see you talking with them all. For many of them, it was just another night out, but having a new comer is a great reminder that every night is special!
For the record, my favorite parts of our great night out were painting your nails and taking that walk to see Paddy at the hospital.
Hugs,
JosieSo I had another “first time out” yesterday – went Christmas shopping in a very busy, big town.
It was totally amazing – I felt so special and blessed, yet also like I was doing nothing out of the ordinary.
Not a catcall or jeer, barely an odd look, but a lot of smiles, particularly from women, and the first shop I went into, I had lovely, friendly assistance from a trans girl!
This made me feel so validated – it was beyond acceptance – I was treated like spmeone special, which is why I felt special.
In return, I allowed myself to be bubbly and girly, in ways I never knew I could be.
I wssn’t in a club, I was in ordinary shops and malls in a town I’ve lived in or near for nearly 50 years.
I still haven’t come down from the high, although it actually feels wrong to be wearing male clothing right now!
Love
Laura
Congratulations Stephanie, what a wonderful time you had. I can only imagine how exciting it was for you. Thanks for sharing, as it gives us all courage to step out there.
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