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Eleven months ago, my wife and I had “the talk.” I was already underdressing with her permission so I asked her if I could start Crossdressing before I ever started. Her only limitations were extremely reasonable and quite acceptable. One, was that I couldn’t crossdress on a day that we were going to be intimate later. That has eased up because I have worn my women’s skinnies, women’s cut shirts, and the only thing I had to do was change out my big hoop earrings for something less feminine.
But the only other limitation was that she did not want to go out with me while I was dressed. That wasn’t a biggie either. But now, 11 months later, she went out to a drag show with me.
We didn’t know until the day before that we were going to have a sitter for our special needs kid. So, when we found out that we could both go out, I had to rethink my outfit and not dress too over the top. I chose a cute blazer/skirt combo.
We met @Philma Bierstein and her wife there. My wife and I came in separate cars because she was picking up her bestie for the show too. While waiting for my wife, I bumped into Molly who was the girl that I danced with for hours at the Rainbow Rave (sometimes quite raunchy). She was there alone so I told her she could join our group. After all, when I was alone at the rave, her group took me in. I did tell her my wife was coming and she didn’t know the extent of our night at the rave. Luckily, Molly didn’t blurt out about the dirty dancing or anything about us dancing together.
My wife isn’t used to late nights and left around midnight. Molly was getting cold because of the lace dress (and it really was chilly) so I put my arm around her and gave her some body heat as we watched the show and danced a bit. Eventually, I gave her my blazer which kinda threw off my outfit a bit. But no worries. It was worth it.
Even when my wife was still there, I ran into Cassie who was in a group of girls that took me in at the Show Me Pride Drag Show. She was hugging all over me, we took selfies, and I stopped by her several times for a few words during the night and my wife never even noticed because we were kinda behind her. I was a little concerned that she might get a little territorial because Cassie is hot. But, like I said, she really didn’t notice.
Interestingly, the next day, she said, “Your friend Molly is weird.” I just said, “Yeah, but she’s nice to have brought me into her group when I was alone.” Maybe, my wife was just pooing on her because she was a cute girl 20 years younger than us. I did know. But nothing else was really said. The day after that, I asked my wife if she would want to go out with me again sometime and she agreed. So, apparently her restrictions are easing up as she has gotten used to seeing me in women’s clothes and in full femme before I go out. Who knows? Perhaps, she might be wanting to go out with me to keep the girls off me a bit.
It was a great time. My wife had fun and wasn’t too worried about my “girlfriends.” Maybe, she’s motivated to go out with me because she wants to keep the girls at bay. Regardless of her motivation, it was a big step for her to go out with me dressed and I am grateful for the chance.
Here are some pictures from the night with Philma, Mollie, Cassie, and the drag queens (several are becoming good friends).
https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/members/trailgirl/mediapress/a-night-out-with-my-wife/
So FUN!! And SUPER cool that your wife was willing to go out with you dressed. That is such a big step and hopefully eases her mind a bit. You all looked GREAT!
*kisses* tara 🙂
That is a great step forward for you and your wife. When this works between couples it can bring them closer together and I’m glad it is going that way for you and your wife.
Amy
Sounds like a great night, I’m hoping my wife will get to this point too. Congrats!
— Abbie 🥰
Thanks, Abbie. The most important thing to remember is baby steps. I eased her into seeing me in women’s clothes gradually after we had the talk. Now, I wear women’s clothes every day. And I suppose she saw me enough times getting ready to go out that she got used to that as well. But yeah, it took 11 months to get to this point.
Hugs
I suggested both of us getting dressed up fancy to watch Drag Race and she’s in. So hopefully we’ll have a good night and I should seem relatively normal compared to the show :-).
— Abbie 🥰
Wow, Mika. Your story sounds somewhat similar to mine.
My wife has known about my little “hobby” since shortly after we got married. For most of our marriage, while raising our kids, I rarely was able to actively enjoy it. But over the past five years, that has dramatically changed. She’s not happy about it, but is somewhat accepting, She also had some restrictions. First, I was never to leave the house, dressed like that. At least, not without her. She said that she wanted to be with me to “protect” me.
Well, that’s changed. Now, I routinely go out to CD/TG events. I attend parties, I meet with friends. I go shopping & clubbing. She & I have even had Girls Days Out. We had makeovers, got mani-pedis, had lunch, went shopping, etc. Her main concern was other people discovering my “shameful little secret”. She worried about the neighbors seeing me. Well, this past weekend, while dog-sitting our son’s dog & she was at work. I had to take the dog out to do his business around noon. I wasn’t about to go drab just to do that, so I took him for a walk, en femme. I told my wife & she was cool with it. In fact, when she got home, she asked me to take some trash around to the side of the house– in plain view of the neighbors.
She also does not like to be intimate, if I’ve dressed earlier that day. That is different than a few years ago when we’ve actually made love while I was full en femme– lingerie, heels, everything. She would tell you it was some of the best we’ve ever had, but as of the past year, she wants no part of it.
My wife seems to have become more accepting– even a bit encouraging. Maybe it’s time for another Girls Day Out & to offer her another chance to be intimate with Dawn.
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Thank you for sharing that, Dawn. I can definitely see some similarities in our stories. My wife has suggested that we get our nails done together. I don’t know if she intends that I be drab or dressed since I always sport fabulous nails in my everyday half drab work appearance.
I would love for my wife to flip on the intimacy thing. But since we did do stuff recently when I was dressed earlier in the day, who knows. Granted, I didn’t do makeup or a wig that day. Baby steps.
Hugs
Doing nails together is so much fun! My wife had those same issues. She didn’t like to kiss me when I had lipstick on, and she didn’t like when the hair from my wig got in her face. But now, my own hair has grown out a bit & I’ve yet to hear her complain.
my wife wants to do pedicures together but I have a thing about people messing with my feet. I’m definitely open to a manicure. But I have been doing my nails for a while and the nail artist better be a good one. Here is a link to the stuff I have done so far.
https://www.crossdresserheaven.com/members/trailgirl/mediapress/my-nail-art/they all look great Mika nails. Was kinda wanting to go with something did on the 2nd pic. Oh good luck with the manicure and pedicare. Know they will do a good job.
Donna
HI Mika sounds like a interesting night. Hopefully all is working after. and no static. Know when was marrried several years ago x wife was the jealous type. When we use to go out dance with unknown woman and guys. She would do the same but knew we always leave together. Loved your friends pumpkin dress and your outfit was nice too. Oh the tuck and untuck sounds like someone testing the water somewhat.
Donna
Thanks, Donna. So far, almost a week later, everything seems perfectly fine. If she does have something to say, she might be waiting for my next night out. I am getting out dressed this weekend but under completely different context. So, whenever I go to the next drag show or rave will be the moment.
You might be right about Molly testing the waters. It’ll be interesting the next time we run into each other. I would never cheat on my wife but Molly and I really haven’t talked a ton for any serious questions to come up. It’s just been a lot of dancing.
Hugs
Wishing the best Mika on next outing.
Donna
Oh wow sounds like be fun time. Any idea on the beer be serving.
Hugs
Donna
I have no clue! LOL. @Philma Bierstein has a home brewery called Inclusion Brewing and I am going to be pouring samples in her booth. She’s not going full femme because she’s not as out as I am. But in the spirit of inclusion, I’m gonna do the total package.
I’ll definitely post about it considering some friends that haven’t officially met Mika yet will be there. And, of course, there will be pictures.
Hugs
Have fun and looking forward to pic.
Donna
Mika, your post prompted me to take another look at your public pics. It is indeed a brief history of Mika Malone. My, what a transformation! From those first shy, from-the-neck-down photos to the very glamorous present. It’s been a treat to share your journey with you.
Best always,
Clara❤️
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