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First off, I want and NEED to thank all you wonderful, inspirational, courageous, and supportive ladies for all that you’ve done, whether directly or indirectly, to make me feel like there is nothing wrong with me for being a man who loves to wear women’s clothing. It has been through your kindness to me and to other girls on here, and your amazing examples of courage that I took a huge step today out of my comfort zone and into a whole new world. Thank you all.
The past two months have been very busy for me, to the point that I haven’t had any time to dress up beyond my panties that I wear every day, and my night gown or nighties. That means no wigs, no dresses, and no shoes, despite the fact that I bought a new dress and belt last week at Walmart and a beautiful black purse and a pair of women’s jeans at a thrift store. But today was different. VERY different.
After deciding that I was going to get dressed and showered and did everything I could to be as feminine and lady-like as I could be, I grabbed my new purse, a sweater/jacket of my wife’s, and walked out the door at 11:30 this morning. As I was driving to the gas station, I realized I forgot two elements of my female persona: nail polish and my black tights to hide my scarred knees. Oh well, the best laid plans of mice and men… So, I arrived at the gas station, and it was as busy as it usually is but that didn’t stop me. I got out and pumped my gas in the freezing cold wind, which by the way, was a thrill to feel blowing up my dress. I did notice that a woman was watching me pump my gas, but what her thoughts were I couldn’t tell, or care.
With my gas tank full, I decided to go to Starbucks for a chai tea (I hate coffee) and a croissant. But this location doesn’t have a drive through so I had to go inside if I wanted anything. Driving around the parking lot to see if I recognized any cars or anyone, I parked and mustered up my own courage to walk in. This is where your stories of overcoming your own fears on your first trips out, inspired me to believe I could do it too. And I did! I grabbed my purse and walked in there like a boss! Well, a nervous and maybe a little bit scared boss, but I went through with it.
Walking in, I noticed that there were about five other customers inside but no one in line, so I walked right up and made my order. The cashier was a young man in his late 20’s or early 30’s I’d have to guess, and he was very pleasant and genuine. He complimented the necklace I wore (it too belongs to my wife) that has an purple amethyst stone, saying he liked it. Now, here’s where it gets a little strange but not in a bad way. He tells me that he needs lots of luck so he bought a piece of jade. Of all the stones he could have mentioned, and there are tons of them, he says the one stone that is also my wife’s name! Was that and omen? A sign from above or from the universe that what I was doing was alright? Who knows, but it made me feel even better about going in there.
When my drink and snack were ready, rather than making a beeline for the door and safety, I sat down at a table and took a few small bites of my croissant and sipped my tea. I even took a shameless selfie to show a friend what I was doing. After fighting with my wig to stay out of my mouth, I gave it up and placed most of the croissant in my purse (I still can’t believe I own a purse!) picked up my drink and went to my car and drove home. The last thing I did as Jill before calling it a day, was to grab my mailbox key and go get my mail. It was an amazing and wonderful day! And again, thank you all for everything!
Hug, Jill
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