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Holly usually hibernates from early February to about the end of May; this year, I really thought she had gone away for ever – so much work to do, so little time and no great desire to put on anything in the way of cute clothing. Yup – I thought Holly had left the building and would never be returning – and then… I went to fetch my morning paper, and on the way back I saw a girl walking down the street – I didn’t really fancy her that much and most of the time I woud have paid little or no attention, but today… Oh, My Goddess! I JUST LOVE HER SHOES! Within a few milliseconds, everything changed; Holly was back – and totally in control! Five minutes later, my cutest mini skirt and my black, lacey tights were on and I felt totally like the lady I always wanted to be.
Does anyone else know this phenomenum? That sudden burst of connection with your feminine side, plus the realisation that she never really should have been allowed to slip away? Am I unusual? (Daft question – now-one ever claimed I wasn’t!) I’m afraid you are all now going to have to put up with a few days of frenetic Holly activity – but please let me know if you recognise the symptoms – it would be interesting to know if I’m not alone in this… Love you all: Holly XXX
Absolutely. I can be him for days and then all of a sudden, a pair of shoes, a skirt, a hair style, and all I want is to be her.
I have been him for family vacation for 5 days now. We were out today and saw the most beautiful dress. All I want is to buy it, and get changed. Vacation with family that don’t know keeps him up front for now. When I get home I hope she is still ready to drive.
Paula
Holly,
Oh Gosh Yes! Whatever euphemism you want (zero to 60, turn on a dime, gone in a flash…) I’ve had those moments!
If I’m fortunate to be at home, close to home, and alone it’s up to my bedroom and change as fast as I can!
If I’m not somewhere I can change, it’s like having an itch and not being able to scratch it! I get kinda absent minded and go into my head imagining what I can/will/want to wear at that particular moment.
Leah
Hi Holly,
For me it was a bit different, but yes I know what you are talking about.
Lara was hibernating for the first 59 of my life. Looking back there were a few signs, but nothing obvious. After never really thinking much about being feminine in any way, one day I saw a clothing add with a beautiful woman in a mini skirt. Within a very short time I was wearing one, and shopping for a bra, and forms. The wardrobe has been growing for four years now, and I’m always thinking about what I am going to wear next time I get the chance. Especially after seeing a pretty woman wearing something that I would love to wear!
So far since this started the feelings have been fairly constant though. If anything they continue to get stronger.💕Lara
Absolutely. I can go for many days without the fog, and then , as you say you see something that triggers you back to your feminine world. I noticed the pull strongest after my first makeover and 2 days out in the world. I’m still trying to figure it out just what it was when I got back. Before that , I had an episode when moving and all Lorraine’s clothes were packed up. I don’t remember what tripped it but she became a maniac, raided the SO closet ( not yet packed) paraded fully dressed in front of the camera. Even at 75 , she is at times beyond control . LOL
Hi Holly you are not alone,
When I’m walking down the street I’m always looking what the girls are wearing and wondering if i would look good in what they are wearing, I’m always buying shoes and clothes for Roz, some i have not had time to try on only last week i bought a pair of shoes and they were yellow all i need now is a yellow dress 👗 to go with them, i can’t find a yellow dress emoji X
Hugs Rozalyn X
I fall into this category as well. I go months without giving it much thought. Then something seemingly trivial will ignite the fire, or maybe more accurately cause the fog to descend. There are periods of middle ground where I’ll do a lot of window shopping on the internet if that’s the right term. Maybe “favoriting” shopping is a better term. Anyway, yes, long periods of drought followed by something small suddenly sparking an overwhelming urge to dress up is definitely the way it is for me.
Hi Holly, of course it hits me more often now, like when I was a kid looking through the thick catalogs at grandmas house or the Sunday sales papers. You know the ones.
It’s just bad when it hits me these days. Most of the time I’m usually in a position that I can’t do anything about it and I wouldn’t be able to do anything about it for some time. I guess that’s one of the worst things about being in secret. I usually try to find something else I’m interested in to think about. It takes a while, but most often than not, it works. At least for a little while.
Rose
Lol, I get it. This happens to me also. I go from meh to pink in a snap. I used to think it was stress or boredom but now it’s not that simple. Lots of “triggers” I guess. 🤷♀️
I’m 90% of the time in pink mode, but can’t do anything about it because of personal circumstances, work etc. there are times though when I will go to the end of the earth to dress, and I’m not sure why that is. I guess like others have said, there must be triggers, no idea what drives the urge so much though
Yep. This happened often. In my case, gender dysphoria triggered the need to wear something girly. The last time it happened, I hadn’t dressed in years. Even thought I was “cured”. I white knuckled it for about a month. Driving past a Target was more than I could resist. I was in the Pink Fog 10 minutes after I got home. That was the turning point when I realized this is who I am. My journey of discovery began that day. Lots has changed in 7 years. Now I’m living in Pink Reality!
/EA
Oh yes. It’s like this ying/yang thing with Dani and the “boy”. Like most CD’s my female persona is strong, outgoing, adventurous and always wants to push the envelope. And she would also like to be in control. And sometimes she is. Of course being closeted (as Brina just said in her latest post – doors locked barred and nailed shut) Dani can’t go too far.
And a good deal of those times that Dani is in control – life is fantastic. Now some would say that’s because she should always be in control and that’s who I really am. At least for me I don’t think so. Life is always a compromise and there are always consequences for our actions.
We just have to walk the tightrope carefully (in our favorite shows, with our favorite outfit on).
(Dan is giggling at my reply) 🙂
Yep, they are called triggers. We all have them not just regarding gender but lots of things. I have an affection to sports cars. If I happen to see a particular one in a particular color, within minutes you’ll find me looking online at cars.
Never really made that connection before, but yeah- except that for me it’s motorcycles. Every so often I’ll see a particular Ducati, Norton or (especially) Royal Enfield and suddenly there’s a huge rush and I can’t stop looking at all the books, magazines and internet articles… Thinking about it, the two experiences are very, very similar – just a reminder of who we really are behind all the socially acceptable facade? And now I’ve just seen a video featuring a particular mini-skirt… guess what I’m doing to do now?… Holly XXX
I understand completely! It comes and goes with me now, and I like it that way. Sometimes I find I’m happy enough in drab, another time I need a new nightie! Having this duality makes life a little more fun. I’ve not been dressing as much so far this year, for various reasons, but the fog is definitely getting thicker again… 🙂
I try to put my feminine feelings aside from time to time in order to find a balance. The past two days I was doing this and getting my guy on, then this morning I woke up feeling so feminine and bursting with girly feelings. So yes, what happened to you happens to me also. Sometimes I’m triggered by seeing a woman with expertly done makeup, sometimes it’s seeing pretty clothes and sometimes I just wake up that way. Whatever the trigger, it’s a wonderful feeling.
Hugs, Liara
I pretty much have the Pink Fog all the time. As I’ve gotten older, the male side of me is reducing and the female side increasing – perhaps related to declining testosterone as I age. I feel it’s the real me coming out. If it wasn’t for being married with kids, I would dress up every day and get fat injections to increase my breast size.
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