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Do you find that crossdressing is always on your mind? I certainly do. This mental pervasiveness can make it very difficult to achieve a balance between our male and female personas but the side effects of this integration can be very positive. In what ways have the side effects of crossdressing had a positive effect on your life as a whole?
I’ll go first. Foremost for me has been motivation toward fitness and physical health. I pretty much ignored this aspect of life, but now I have strong motivation to stay in shape, eat more healthfully, and take care of my body. I’ve got to stay in a reliable size 10 to fit into the clothes I like, and in so doing my fitness regime helps both of my personas stay in good physical health.
Second on the list would be the rekindling of old interests. As a younger person I was very interested in photography, and I got away from it as I became older. With photography such an integral part of my CD experience this interest has come back stronger than ever, and I find it is not just limited to CD photos. I am working hard to improve my artistic skill in this area, which is enjoyable in itself. I am enjoying photographing images from nature as well, seeing appreciating the natural beauty around me as never before.
Third would be improvement of my social skills. I’ve always been a rather shy individual, not too much into the socialization aspect of life. CDing though seems to bring it a desire to reach out to others and make friends, and I have done that and continue to do that now in all aspects of my life.
So, how about you? Do you have positive side effects from CDing beyond Cding itself? Let’s share!
Kris
Easy answer.
Crossdressing….and more specifically socializing….put me on the path to discovering my authentic self. I’m trans and life has never been better. My wardrobe has changed significantly. And I’m not crossdressing….
/EA
If I’m honest with myself I think about crossdressing constantly, I’m still more or less in the closet but I’m always checking out outfit options online or thinking about when I will next get a free day to dress
I feel like my crossdressing improves my mood and makes me more conscious about keeping up with my appearance when not dressed
I love that when I visit my GG friend she calls me by my chosen name and always helps me out with outfits or makeup tips….. she often says to me when I turn up at her door all dolled up that “ your a better girl than me” it confirms to me that I am Jem and Jem is me and I have no plans to change that anytime soon
Jem xxx
I realize that I have a female alter ego. Crossdressing allows me to let her out. I am thrilled to go out in public in a skirt and heels. For the most part, nobody pays me any attention. A couple of hours dressed as a woman eliminates any depression and lets me get through the week on an even keel. I’m sure a lot of you feel the same way.
hugs,
Kerri
The side effects of dressing is that I am more aware of fashion and always aware of how I present when going out. The sameness of male attire is in stark contrast to the female where each day sees something different worn and even if the same dress is worn the next day it is accessorised giving it a different style. I am proud of my appearance and am always adding to the wardrobe with more thought to the purchase where the male didn’t.
Another positive is that family and friends have not turned their backs but embraced the female.
Great question Kris. As others have already mentioned mood improves for the better when I get some time to dress. I also find it has given me an even greater understanding of what the females in my life go through on a regular basis.
I also find it has given me an even greater understanding of what the females in my life go through on a regular basis.
Absolutely Megan! That’s an important one!
Well said Megan, for me it provides a better understanding of what women go through and has brought more women related topics of conversation with my spouse and GG neighbour, the only two people I have told. When dressed en femme, I feel more liberated and with more freedom to express the way I feel through my mannerisms or clothes I wear. I do not feel that competitive pressure or stress of watching what I say or do, especially around GG when dresses as a male.
I’m right there with Emily. After a full year of living as my real self, the girl I was born as, the side effects, if you call it that, are so amazing it is hard to believe. The women I work with tell me I’ve changed so much since I transitioned that they refer to it as my transformation. What they say is they viewed me as a trans woman a year ago, and now they see me, as a woman!
What they say is this: “Lauren, you’ve become so comfortable as Lauren, your speech, your mannerisms, how you dress, your hair and makeup, you put a lot of us to shame!”
I am truly blessed and amazed!
Hugs girls,
Ms. Lauren M
For me Caty has always been and always, (for well over 40 years), will be my “other me” who, (as a therapist once told me) “takes me to another place”.
A broken marriage, various other relatives giving me a hard time, stress of a career that lasted (again) nearly 40 years. And to cap that all off, a severe mental illness about 7 years ago.
But when the dust from “all the above” settled/settles, there she is. Waiting to take me to that special place of calm and contentment and living as the woman that lives deep within my soul. Does not happen “full time” all that often, but I underdress 24/7 and sleep femme every night. Just feels so natural, especially when I sleep on my side and my arms fall down onto “my breasts”.
Another very positive aspect is, “when I was young”, I had some lovely and very helpful older CD mentors. It has been my privilege to return that favour with the “younger generation”.
Happy dressing,
Caty ( The Mature One!).
I consider myself transgender. Earlier in this journey, I did think that I was a crossdresser and I did the occasional dress up. I didn’t know about the part of the iceberg that was underwater, which I have only begun to explore (in all honesty, I will explore for the rest of my life). I originally started this to heal some baggage from my childhood that has been holding me back in life. I now equate healing my life and being transgender as the same path. One would not exist without the other. It would take several pages for me to describe the emotional healing benefit of this path. And as others have mentioned, I am taking better care of my health with diet, supplements and exercise.
Thanks, Autumn. My path is going down a similar road, when I first came back to CD I was terrified of the idea I might be Trans. BUT the more I get into all this dressing and being out in the world the more I want to present as a woman all the time.
What you described as the ‘healing my life and being transgender’ might make a great article here.. Cassie
For me, crossdressing has always been about the thrill and excitement of wearing the clothes. I loved how they look and feel and the excitement and thrill of wearing them. That led to me eventually creating Patty.
Patty enabled me to be fully femme and go out dressed. It was often very scary, but the more scared I was, if I got through the fear, the excitement and thrills were even greater.
The more bold and adventurous I became, the greater the fear, but the more intense and exciting the thrill were. It’s nuts to go through that, but the experience and feelings is amazing. Just can’t feel that way doing anything else.
In 1999, we enrolled our daughter in martial arts and after I signed, I was asked, “What about you?”. I signed up too, since I had to take her to classes anyway.
That changed me forever. It was such a confidence builder.
Daring to go outside while crossdressing, to whatever degree, is having the same affect on me. I love it!
Thanks for this topic and your thoughts. I think crossdressing has definitely helped me with my social skills. I am also more comfortable and confident in myself. I don’t pass particularly well, so going out requires a boldness that I think has been good for me. I think my attitude towards what others think is healthier. I’ve also felt my relationship with my religion strengthened. Crossdressing has helped me think about my religion in new ways that have lead to important spiritual growth.
Most importantly, I think, I find I am much more patient and accepting of others, more gracious and more kind.
For me, crossdressing was always on my mind until the last few months when it wasn’t. But that turned out fine because, when it wasn’t, it was because it felt so natural being me that I kind of forgot I’m dressed. So whether it’s on my mind or not – it’s all good.
And I agree with you that many CD’s find themselves more socially active. I am more so now than I ever was as a male. And I find it to be a very pleasant experience.
Fiona
Crossdressing has had and continues to have numerous positive effects on my life.
Probably what I would consider the single most important positive item is the continuing effect it has on my program of recovery from alcoholism. Crossdressing is an important part of my program of recovery from alcoholism. For sure, there are other parts to my recovery program, but crossdressing ranks right up there at the top.
Moreover, I found I am not alone. At our CDH Atlanta Girls Group support meeting, I met a girl who also considers crossdressing as part of her recovery program from alcoholism.
It gives me something to look forward to. I reserve Friday afternoons for cding. If I think I look ok I’ll go out in public. It is such a rush to walk into a store wearing a skirt and heels. So far I haven’t had any trouble with people, even though I’m over six feet in heels. Since I’m alone in the world there is no SO to care about what I’m doing. I buy almost all my clothes at thrift stores so I’m not spending a lot of money on Kerri’s wardrobe. Is there a downside to this?
Thanks Kris, another great topic that has really given me pause for thought.
I do really enjoy the feel of feminine clothes, and love being able to dress as a woman. I am now starting to explore the outside world as Helen, when it is safe to do so, and thoroughly enjoying it.
A couple of girls on here have mentioned the emotional healing effects of dressing, and this is something that is especially true for me. I’ve noticed that when things go down the pan emotionally for me (I’m a very emotional person, male or female) then being able to become Helen really gives me solace and comfort.
And that is what has brought this latest outburst of “Helen-ing” about, and given me the courage and drive to join this site and to go out dressed. For the very first time in my life, after 20 plus years of very happy marriage and completely out of the blue, I very, very nearly had an affair with a woman. She has also been married for 20 plus years. It got very intense very quickly, and it was only at the very last minute that she lost her courage and ended it. Crazy I know but my heart was shattered, and of course I could tell no-one. My wife was away, and being able to be Helen really helped me get back on my feet.
I’ve always been conscious of the latest female fashions, having seen the girls on my commute for over 30 years. Helen is a fashionable lass, but now she’s older its much more age appropriate.
I’ve not really been able to share that with anyone before. Hope you understand.
Much love
Helen xx
I find this difficult to explain but I am calmer, I don’t feel the need to rush through things. I am taking the time to smell the roses.
As a guy I hated grocery shopping. Go to the store, rush down the aisles get my stuff and rush back home. No idea why I was in a hurry.
Today I go out I may never get to the grocery store and not worry about it. I go MAC’s, Sephora’s , lingerie store and I may just get to the groceries.
I take better care of my skin.
I find it very therapeutic when I dress in the morning and put on my makeup.
When I am out say walking through a bookstore I don’t think about being out dressed as a woman and that is a great feeling because I have reached that level of confidence.
As a guy I probably wouldn’t have even made it to the bookstore.
Alanna
I would the most positive impact is on my self-aacceptance. I was never very secure in my self and always had a bit of an inferiority complex. I wss the youngest of three brothers by several years, so got picked on a good bit. I was never great at sports, and was nearly last picked for teams often. I never thought of myself as good looking, and was just over all a mediocre kind of guy.
Then I started dressing, lingerie at first, then years later fully en femme. When in lingerie, I liked they way I looked and like to take pictures. Now I know I still looked like a guy in lingerie, but I felt so sexy that it just boosted my confidence. The same applied to when I started to fully dress en femme. I just felt great and I liked my look, even though I knew that I still looked like a guy in a dress. I felt empowered and had a huge confidence boost.
while I do not enjoy being in pictures at events, and am never satisfied at my appearance, put me in a dress and take pictures and I am happy as can be. In guy mode I still have low self-esteem, but improved, but put me in a dress and apply some lipstick and I am super confident and empowered.
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