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    • #573823
      Lucinda Hawkns
      Registered On: September 1, 2015
      Topics: 6
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      since you are there you might as well enjoy the time there and say you look pretty, what kind of perfume are you wearing or some thing to that matter, then see what goes from there. you went there  to have a good time i suppose. so why not join in and talk to other cross dressers i know i would of.

      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #573818
      Barb Wire
      Duchess - Annual
      Registered On: September 16, 2021
      Topics: 12
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      I’m not sure what I’d do.


      Cassie, posts like yours are encouraging me to get out more often. I did last night and even mingled with the crowd on the outskirts (ahem..) at a sporting event with botched make up and clearly visible hosiery. Heels were out of the question since the event was on gravel and grass, so tasteful hiking boots were best. I looked okay, I guess. No looks or anything. Boo…

      If I did see a sister, I would have smiled with a slight and modest wave and then see what happens.


      🥂 Barb

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    • #573810
      Dani Grand
      Registered On: October 9, 2018
      Topics: 1
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      Hopefully like any other conversation I would start with someone I have never met…”Hi, it’s a pleasure to meet you…who are you and where are you from?” Or, “I love your ___ (shoes, skirt, etc., pick 1 or more), where did you get them?”

      In fem mode, I am a touch more conservative with conversations with new people, but the basics are still the basics. Make eye contact, smile as best as you can, a polite greeting, clasp/shake hands/hug, introduction, etc.

      Sometimes, I think we (collectively – humanity, not just CDs) make being social far more awkward that it really needs to be.

      Next time, just say ‘hi’…you’ll be surprised what happens…


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    • #573788
      Registered On: April 4, 2021
      Topics: 2
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      Assuming that loud music was playing, it is a great option to go up close to speak, like speaking directly into her ear. 🤭 It’s not possible to do that in a normal conversation. I would have just said that you look great. Personally, I have realised that it is better to be brave (and even sometimes get a -ve reaction) than just wondering later on what i could have done.

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    • #573685
      Mia Mor’e
      Registered On: June 27, 2021
      Topics: 7
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      I would compliment something about her appearance and try to get a feel for how receptive she is about conversing.

      6 users thanked author for this post.
    • #573497
      Paula F
      Registered On: August 7, 2019
      Topics: 17
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      The best ice breaker would be to smile as soon as eye contact is made.  Compliment her on her ensemble or just part of it, like her blouse or necklace or purse.

      It is important, if you are endrab, to let  her know you are a sister and not an admirer trying to make a score.

      Once you have given her that compliment, let her react.  Body language will be the first ‘tell’ as to whether she wants to chat or is unsure, both of herself and meeting new people unexpectedly.

      By all means though, if you can, at least try and make a connection.


    • #573477
      Jeannie Jones
      Registered On: October 9, 2020
      Topics: 14
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      I would have gone over and said I am on my own too. Is it ok if I sit with you and chat?

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    • #573453
      Michelle McQueen
      Registered On: June 14, 2021
      Topics: 16
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      I’ve always thought that an opening line could be “Hello sister”. If the person wants to talk she will respond and if not you will know in a few seconds where the situation stands. I think you should have approached her and it could have turned into a fun interesting night making a new friend.

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    • #573444
      Deborah Sullivan
      Registered On: February 27, 2020
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      I am very sure she would have enjoyed you approaching her with the said lines given above. She wouldnt have been there if she didnt want to meet others like us. A simple hi and a compliment would break the ice since she may have been as nervous as you. I would have been delighted if I were her .

    • #573368
      Rozalyne Richards
      Registered On: September 20, 2021
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      Hi Cassie,

      Just go the direct root hi my name is Cassie is it ok if i sit down, then just say I’ve never been to this bar before how about you do you come here often, then just see how the conversation goes, she can only say sorry I’m off or she will start talking to you,

      Hugs Roz X

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    • #573357
      Bobbisue Jones
      Registered On: May 24, 2021
      Topics: 11
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      Hi Cassie, thank you for post this question as I am going to attend my first drag show this coming Saturday. I also wish to thank sisters for very helpful information. Love and hugs Bobbisue J

      • #573811
        Dani Grand
        Registered On: October 9, 2018
        Topics: 1
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        Love it! You be you. Everyone else is already taken so Oscar tells us.

        3 users thanked author for this post.
    • #573310
      Birel Galanodel
      Registered On: May 3, 2020
      Topics: 22
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      Laura, you got me thinking about my own category now. I guess I’m a shrinking violet. I both want to be invisible, yet crave the conversation and human interaction at the same time.

      Stephanie, ironically, the bar in question just opened up a couple weeks ago, so that line might be an amusing conversation starter. 🙂

      Cassie, I hope to join you there later this week. Ironically, I think I saw a fellow sister walking through Walmart last night… but if she was a CD, she was so good at it that I couldn’t be 100% sure. I didn’t have the opportunity to talk to her, she looked like she was on a mission as she passed by. I’m not sure if I would have had the courage to say anything anyway, but, “Those are fabulous boots, where did you get them?” comes to mind. Come to think of it, I wonder if having a local gay/drag bar will help bring more of us out?


    • #573284
      Connie Twirl
      Registered On: August 18, 2021
      Topics: 14
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      I’d guess that a compliment would be the best ice-breaker. “Hey, I love your shoes!”.

      Avoid “Hey, nice tuck!” unless you’re 100% sure…………



    • #573278
      Laura Lovett
      Registered On: March 26, 2020
      Topics: 37
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      I have met several sisters when out en femme – these tend to fall into 3 categories:

      1. The excited supersister. As soon as you see her, her eyes light up – no need for explanations, you’re already bezzie mates. With this type you can be like “Hi, Darling, how are you? Oh, my – you look gorgeous!! I love your (insert most fabulous aspects here) – can I get you a drink, and other no holds barred gushiness. From the reciprocation, you gauge whether you need to tone it down a bit for comfort, or let the world know how amazing the sisterhood is.

      2. The reluctant shrinking violet. This type looks a bit lonely, and gazes around, hopefully. Generally, the clothes are a little poorly thought out and the makeup skills are next to non-existent – but she is trying, and she is there, and she is my sister. My introduction will be along the lines of “Oh, hi! Are you a sister? What’s your name, honey?”, and I will see if she opens up, using a compliment to get the feelings flowing. If she doesn’t want the company of an outrageous hussy like me, I will know, and not be an over-sensitive drama queen – usually this type warm to you as the evening goes on, and they see you mingling with all sorts of other people, and are not specifically picking on them!

      3. The ignorant beyatch. Sorry, girls, but there are members of our sisterhood who think their look is super-convincing, and they don’t want an obvious bloke in a frock outing them with air-head conversation. I find this ignorant – in the literal sense of the word, as this type will pretty much act like you’re not even there and look around as if looking out for someone else, building a wall of “Do not approach me”.

      Huh! Who wants to talk to someone else when they could be talking to Laura?




    • #573274
      Diane Rakers
      Registered On: August 18, 2019
      Topics: 4
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      Hi, I’m Cassie. may I join you?


      4 users thanked author for this post.
    • #570965
      Liara Wolfe
      Registered On: August 14, 2021
      Topics: 3
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      I guess the best way would be to casually introduce you self as a CD and go form there. With that said, I would actually probably start to stammer and stutter like I did when I was a teenager asking a girl out, LOL.

      Hugs, Liara

    • #570936
      Stephanie Bass
      Princess - Annual
      Registered On: November 30, 2019
      Topics: 16
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      Hi Cassie the easiest way was to ask her if she comes there often and ask about the shows on the weekends and go from there you got this girl easy as pie ..he he ..

      Stephanie Bass

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