Repeal on separate bathrooms for TGs in the schools

[cdheaven]

I apologize for discussing politics but the repeal of Obama’s decision on separate bathrooms for transgender really bothers me.  Yes, I did vote for him.  No, I didn’t vote for Obama.  So, I probably don’t have any right to say anything, but I don’t think I have to agree with the President on everything. This sets back TGs getting fair treatment so much.  I am so tired of society on both the straight and LGBTQ+ community treating us so poorly.  Why is wanting to dress and/or identify as the opposite sex such a big deal????  It’s this small minded thinking that kills our self image and results in such a high suicide rate for TGs.  Sorry for the rant and I will understand if this is removed from CDH.

[Pattie]

All I am going to say is this:

1) NO ONE should be forced to accept anything.

2) I do feel that transgender should have their own bathrooms and will support schools in that regard.

3) Do I want boys in girls rooms or gyms? NO. Do I want girls in boys rooms or gyms? NO.

That is all I’m going to say unless something deserves a response 100%

[Rose]

This is touchy, because of the intersection of politics. Even on forums that allow open political (or religious) discussion, I tend to avoid it as much as possible. That said, I’ll try because the ladies here are so wonderful.

It’s easy for those who choose to do so to ostracize the TG community, because our media makes them out to be either dangerous, weirdos, or (at best) the punchline of a joke. Seriously. Think about the portrayal of transgender characters. You get the “villain” from Ace Ventura, played up for yucks. You get Rocky from Rocky Horror Picture Show, played for yucks and the weirdo factor. You get the Crying Game, played for shock and disgust. Off the top of my head, the only semi-positive portrayal I can think of is Orange is the New Black – and even then, the character in question is in prison. (Full disclosure: I think it’s possible to view Caitlyn Jenner as a positive or “for yucks” portrayal in the media, so I intentionally didn’t mention her.)

So, for a lot of people (unfortunately), when they hear “transgender” that is who they think of. They think of freaks, weirdos, perverts, and so on. It’s an uphill battle from the start – and that’s without also dragging religion into this hot-button political issue. There also seems to be very little consideration for FtM transgender; most people complain about “men in the bathroom with their wives and children” but there’s very little about the opposite. They’ve never met a transgender person; or, at least, they don’t know if they have. Hell, until about 8 years or so ago when a co-worker came out and transitioned, I had never met one either. I’m lucky enough to count her as a friend, and I’ve since become friendly with several other TG women – some who transitioned before I met them, and one that transitioned after.

I don’t really have answers, unfortunately, other than we need to do whatever we can to help make everyday people realize transgender people are just people. For some, that means coming out so their friends and family see; for many, though, that’s not a safe option. Those of us who choose to remain closeted, for whatever reasons, still need to do our part. We need to shoot down bigotry when we see it – such as if our ultra-conservative uncle posts something degrading on Facebook. Sometimes, that’s an uncomfortable confrontation, but it’s important.

We need to ensure our politicians – local, state, and federal – know how we feel about issues that touch the TG community (and the LGBTQ+ community at large), and they need to know that such issues will sway how we vote going forward. Calling is the best way to get your voice heard, but if you can’t call your senator, representative, governor’s office, mayor’s office, etc, then write a letter. A letter you send through snail mail is far more effective than email. I’ve heard from several sources that politicians mostly ignore emails, other than as a way to cull valid email addresses for building mailing lists of their own. There’s really very little thought or effort involved in sending an email; there is thought and effort – and minimal expense, too – in sending a snail mail letter. Raise your voice, often, around the issues. (And that advice is true for any topic that’s important to you, not just LGBTQ+ issues; if you want your politicians to really know how you feel, call their offices and tell them. There are scripts you can find online that will walk you through how to say your piece briefly and succinctly so it makes an impact.)

And we need to have one another’s backs. Even if you’re in the closet, if you see somebody bullying another person for using a bathroom – whether or not the person really is TG – stand up for them. Make a scene. Take the heat off the person being bullied, and let him or her know there are allies out there.

The rights gained by the LGBTQ+ community over the past 20 years or so is incredible, frankly. Honestly, 20 years ago who would’ve thought gay marriage would be legal, for example? But sometimes in a war, you lose a battle but still win the war overall. That’s where we are now. It’s a step backward, but only a small one. We need to focus on moving forward, regaining the little bit of ground that was lost, and then pushing onward from there.

[Anonymous]

I agree with Rose about all the positive changes we’ve seen in recent times. On that note, I just read about a girl’s school in west London that allows pupils to adopt boys names and wear boy’s clothes if they request it, or be known as gender neutral. The head teacher says «we are moving to the point where your gender is a choice». The school has had an LGTB society for a long time. Apparently the pupils’ main concern is to look after people who don’t want to identify as one gender or another. The article also mentions a trend for young people to question their gender identity.

Ok, it’s just one example, and it’s a private school, an oasis of enlightenment! But 20 years ago I don’t think this could have happened. Things are changing. And some of the young people who are leading those changes may  be politicians tomorrow. The fast growing CDH community is doing it’s bit, too. So many things I have read here lead me to believe that dignity, self respect and confidence in ourselves leads to the acceptance and respect from others.

 

 

[cdheaven]

i totally agree with all of you girls it’s time for the world to just accept the facts transgender people have been around for thousands of years . deal with it people! i’m real and i have purpose! i am as valid as anyone else in any community,the world needs to come to terms with me, iv’e done so CATCH UP WORLD

[Author]

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