• This topic has 12 replies, 11 voices, and was last updated 4 years ago by Anonymous.
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    • #167804

      Hi I’m looking to take my first shopping trip in drab, definitely not ready to go enfemme. Looking for any advice/help.  I live in the ny/nj metro area. Thanks in advance ladies

    • #167808

      What advice are you looking for? For me, I shop in drab a lot. And, sometimes en femme. Usually hit Target, Wal Mart and for shoes DSW.  Used to go to Fashionbug till they went out of business.

      • #167809

        Mainly looking for stores, maybe any experience with helpful sales associates, especially if anyone is in my local area

    • #167855
      Anonymous

      So I mostly shop online for whatever I’m looking at, though in college I used to go to Target to buy panties and one time I picked out a pack and got to the register and the girl checking me out (was around my age) looked me up and down then said, “those are some pretty panties you have there” and gave me a VERY knowing smile.

      I was not prepared for that haha! Made me go beet red and I just mumbled something about them being for a school project (like wtf why did I think that was a good reason to give?) and just got the heck out of there.
      I actually walk around NYC a lot as part of my job (construction management going to different sites in Manhattan) so I’m always passing by shops with the most beautiful outfits and dresses and I would love to dive in if I had a break during the day to try something on, but between my nerves and schedule I never do. Definitely slow-walk past them window shopping though 🙂
    • #167887
      Anonymous

      Michelle, I know that it may be hard to believe… but stores love your money the same they love everybody’s money!

      Been there, done that, wondering what they may think. Other than suggesting you to shop as far away from home and work to minimize the risk of somebody recognizing you, why should you care about what a perfect stranger may think about you. Being able to tell them “It is for me” if they ask is very liberating.

      Good luck!

      Gaby 💜

      • #167922

        As for helpful stores I would recommend Chico’s and Maurices. Both are welcoming and personally assist shoppers. Chico’s was amaze-ballz when I tried them once. I picked out two outfits I liked and was given a changing room. Then the sales lady picked out half a dozen more outfits all in similar style to the ones I picked out. I had a lot of fun. Also…a delectable caveat for you…if you become a member of their free store club one could invite a bunch of friends, they’ll close the store all for you all, and you could try have the run of the store. Chico’s is fairly expensive and more dressy while Maurices is averagely priced and casual.

    • #167955

      If you are worried about being recognised go on a shopping trip somewhere you will not be recognised.

      I started in superstores with self service tills, and untagged (security tags)items of clothing, so no interaction with staff.

      I then resolved to widen my choice of shops, and have never experienced any problems at the tills. I also decided that if I was asked, I would admit the items were for me, thinking the shop assistant would think it a joke !

      As for trying items on, I only go to certain shops which sell male and female clothes, and go to the male changing rooms. I have to admit I usually try to cover any feminine clothes under a male shirt/jacket, and again have never encountered a problem. A couple of times a shop assistant has asked how many items I am taking into the changing rooms, and have been satisfied counting the hangers, but again would not have a problem if  it was noticed.

      I have come to the realisation the biggest obstacle is in our head, and if you go somewhere you will not be recognised what is the worst that could happen? It is actually exciting, and after the first time I started to relax and enjoy it. More than once I have tried something on and realised it did not fit or didn’t look good on me, but when you slip into something that fits and looks good it is a bit of a thrill.

      This is just my experience, hope it helps.

      love

      Bianca

    • #167959
      Becka
      Lady

      Just go about it naturally.  On one seems to care one way or the other.  Least that has been my experience.

      The only difficulty about an established department store, as opposed to a “vintage” (thrift or second hand store), are the dressing rooms.  If I find something I really like in a department store and want to try on, I have to take it to the mens department and in some cases, the “mens department” is a physically separate store!

      Sigh!

    • #168026
      Marianne
      Ambassador

      I do virtually all my clothes shopping in stores, having visited everything from good will to high street fashion boutiques and formal wear specialists in both male and female mode. In a new store I always politely ask a sales assistants if it is ok to try the things on and I have only once been denied and twice been adviced to use the men’s section. All other times the store has either had unisex dressing rooms, which usually means  a row of cubicles along a wall, or I have been welcome to use the ladies. Once cleared, I do not bother to ask the next time.

      The staff has many times been helpful, asking if I need help with back zippers or would like them to find another size for me. On many occasions I have modelled the clothes for sales assistants to get their input on fit and style and I must say several have been surprised how well I wear them. One even once asked me to model a brand new line of dresses for her as she hadn’t yet seen how they looked on someone.

      My bottom line is that if you are open and polite about your intentions it is very rarely a problem to try things on before deciding what to buy.

    • #169812

      If you have a “GARAGE” Ladies Wear store I’m your area try them in full ENFEMME mode.

      I happened upon one by accident a few days ago and had no problem getting a new bodysuit I’d seen in their display window.

    • #169892

      PS for Bras and panties etc go to a SOMA INTIMATES STORE, have always had no problem with either of the 2 stores I patronize. Never any problem etc once a sales person during checkout put the small size of one panty in my shopping bag instead of my medium size by accident, didn’t discover the mixup for two months  as I still had original sales receipt that had it list as size medium , mgr said obviously clerk put the wrong size one my bag with my purchases by accident.  As I had purchased several different styles of panties.  In one style I need small vs medium in the other styles

      SOMA also haS an online website but I have never used it for purchase, prefer brick and mortar store.

      I say stay away from Victoria Secret  both online and B&M VS stores, I’ve been treated badly by both a number of years ago.

      I purchased several Underwire bras they all within a month of purchase,  the end seams of the underwire fabric failed exposing the underwire ends.  Both the online website I purchased them from. Went to a brick & mortar store 40 miles away from me at that time, they exchanged for new duplicates but they did the same thing again,  went back to the same store this time no xchange nor refund saying since online and retail stores a two separate businesses entities except for exchange of defective online purchases products. As exchanging defective exchanges was a not allowed. Don’t know if that was a policy of the retail franchised store or the parent company

       

    • #172001
      Anonymous

      It is a bit hard to tell what u r asking for.  If u go shopping in drab but try it in r u still i drab?  I have never gone shopping en femme but have tons of experience shopping online or in drab (mot trying it on).  Message me if that would be helpful

    • #169917
      Anonymous

      Like Stephanie I use UK supermarkets with the self service option but if you are confident enough you could try stores that require face to face contact you will probably never meet the assistant again and it it must be exiting.but I am not there yet.

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